The Reinvention of Janey Quotes

“He stares at me, not saying a word. I stare right back, lost in his eyes and determined to get my point across. If he wants to have a staring contest, he’ll lose, hands down. I know a good thing when I see it.”
― J.C. Patrick, The Reinvention of Janey

“I sneak quietly up the stairs and toward my door. It’s not very late, but I don’t want to arouse Cyclops Eye next door. I’ve stopped looking as I walk past, but it’s difficult not to notice her window open just a few inches and her sitting right next to it, ready at a moment’s notice to give me her big one-eyed look. Maybe I should get her a monocle for Christmas, so she can make more of a statement.”
― J.C. Patrick, The Reinvention of Janey

“The old Janey only drank cheap wine and light beer. The new Janey is classy, prefers cocktails, and even drinks alone.”
― J.C. Patrick, The Reinvention of Janey

“I notice being noticed immediately – I’m a freeway goddess! In the past five minutes of gridlock, I have been checked out by a bald man in convertible Mustang, a cowboy in an F-150, and a body-builder in a Lincoln Navigator. Watch out road warriors! I don’t want to be responsible for any accidents. If only I had a car decal that advertised: Available – if you meet my eligibility criteria!”
― J.C. Patrick, The Reinvention of Janey

“Unforgettable…that’s who you are... I have always loved this song. But I am forgettable to anyone - I even try to forget myself, at times. But I have hope that the new Janey will become more beautiful,motivated, and intellectually stimulating. Need I go on? My wish list of attributes is so long that it would qualify for a Guinness World Record, if they have a category for number of fanciful ideas about oneself.”
― J.C. Patrick, The Reinvention of Janey

“Professional is an apt definition for me, professional slouch, that is. I can be very professional at seeming to do work, but the real work is trying to do as little as possible, without getting caught by Trip or any nosey busybodies.”
― J.C. Patrick, The Reinvention of Janey

“I'm overweight, despise change, and rarely, if ever, initiate anything. Unlike my friends, I’ve had no drama in my life which might qualify as box office material. If a little more drama came my way, however, I would probably need to purchase some courage in order to withstand it. Oh well, if a bit of change equals a bit of drama, I’m willing to risk it.”
― J.C. Patrick, The Reinvention of Janey

“After a few more minutes of daydreaming about how fabulous I could become, I look down at the heading on my paper: Janey's Reinvention Plan. It appears lonely at the top of the page. I should probably add some bullets beneath, but I've never been much of a list maker.”
― J.C. Patrick, The Reinvention of Janey