Option B Quotes

“While it seems obvious that friends want to support friends going through a crisis, there are barriers that block us. There are two different emotional responses to the pain of others: empathy, which motivates us to help, and distress, which motivates us to avoid.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“Two out of ten U.S. children of all backgrounds live in poverty, and one-third of black and close to one-third of Latino children are poor. Forty-three percent of children of single mothers live in poverty. More than two and a half million children have a parent in jail.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“I promise I will raise your children as Vikings fans even though I know nothing about football and I’m pretty sure that team never wins.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“Resilience comes from deep within us and from support outside us. It comes from gratitude for what’s good in our lives and from leaning in to the suck. It comes from analyzing how we process grief and from simply accepting that grief. Sometimes we have less control than we think. Other times we have more.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“Counting blessings can actually increase happiness and health by reminding us of the good things in life.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“Life is never perfect. We all live some form of Option B.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“All over the world, there is cultural pressure to conceal negative emotions. In China and Japan, the ideal emotional state is calm and composed. In the United States, we like excitement (OMG!) and enthusiasm (LOL!). As psychologist David Caruso observes, “American culture demands that the answer to the question ‘How are you?’ is not just ‘Good.’…We need to be ‘Awesome.’ ”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“He explained that our amount of resilience isn’t fixed, so I should be asking instead how I could become resilient. Resilience is the strength and speed of our response to adversity—and we can build it. It isn’t about having a backbone. It’s about strengthening the muscles around our backbone.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“Men who start new relationships are judged less harshly. Women are expected to carry the torch of love, and when the flame is extinguished they are supposed to mourn for it longer. The weeping widow lives up to our expectations. The widow who dances and dates does not. These differences reflect a double standard rooted in a range of issues, from women feeling more guilt and anxiety about new romances to a greater cultural acceptance of men marrying younger women to the demographic reality of women living longer than men.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“How soon is too soon to date? I heard about a woman in England who lost her husband and began dating his best friend four weeks later. People were shocked at how quickly her new romance started. Her mother-in-law cut off communication with her and many of her friends did too. "Blame me if you like," the woman said, "but grief hits people in different ways and I have no regrets." When you are widowed, people pity you and want your sorrow to end. But if you start dating, sometimes they judge you and think maybe your sorrow ended just a wee bit too soon. A childhood friend of mine who is now a rabbi told me that in the Jewish religion, mourning for a parent, child, or sibling is a year, but mourning for a spouse is just thirty days. "The rabbis wanted people to move forward," he said.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“[Caryn Marooney] has led the global communications team and made it through radiation. On her first day of treatment, I gave her a necklace with the letters "YGT." She was confused at first since her initials are "CLM." I explained that it was a symbol of my faith in her and stood for "You've got this.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“To help the conversations go well, I reminded everyone that feedback should always go both ways. I talked about how a single sentence can make people more open to negative feedback: "I'm giving you these comments because I have very high expectations and I know that you can reach them.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“Adam wondered where Tim got his resilience. Tim said it began with his parents. Tim's dad had a knack for reframing painful events. One day Tim came home from school upset that kids were staring and asking what was in his ear. His father gave hijm a tip: next time it happened, Tim could press his hearing aid, throw a punch in the air, and shout, "Yes! Cubs are now up two to one in the ninth." Tim gave it a try,and the kids were jealous that he was listening to the game during a boring class. In high school, Tim leaned in for a kiss at the end of a date and his hearing aid started beeping loudly. His father told him not to worry about it: "She's probably saying to her mom right now, 'I kissed boys before tonight and I've seen fireworks - but I've never heard sirens.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“When a company lays off employees, those who keep their jobs often struggle with survivor guilt The thought process behind with "It should've been me." This is followed by gratitude - "I'm glad it wasn't me" - which is quickly washed away by shame: "I'm a bad person for feeling happy when my friends lost their jbs."o”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“What triggered resilience for me," [Vernon Turner] said, "was God giving me strength and my mom telling me, right before she died, that no matter what happens, you keep the family together. I turned to football to save my family. When they measured my stature, they failed to measure my heart.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“As time passed, I felt especially grateful to my family and friends who continued to check in and show up. On the six month anniversary of Dave's death, I sent them a poem, "Footprints in the Sand." It was originally a religious parable, but to me it also expressed something profound about friendship. the poem relates a dream of walking on the beach with God. The storyteller observes that in the sane there are two sets of footprints except during those periods of life filled with "anguish, sorrow or defeat." Then there is only one set of footprints. Feeling forsaken, the storyteller challenges God, "Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?" The Lord replies, "The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my child, are when I carried you." I used to think there was only one set of footprints because my friends were carrying me through the worst days of my life. But now it means something else to me. When I saw one set of footprints, it was because they were following directly behind me, ready to catch me if I fell.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“In classic experiments on stress, people performed tasks that required concentration, like solving puzzles, while being blasted at random intervals with uncomfortably loud sounds. They started sweating and their heart rates and blood pressure climbed. They struggled to focus and made mistakes. Many got so frustrated that they gave up. Searching for a way to reduce anxiety, researchers gave some of the participants an escape. If the noise became too unpleasant, they could press a button and make it stop. Sure enough, the button allowed them to stay calmer, make fewer mistakes, and show less irritation. That's not surprising. But here's what is: none of the participants actually pressed the button. Stopping the noise didn't make the difference...knowing they could stop the noise did. The button gave them a sense of control and allowed them to endure the stress.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“That’s why the survivor clubs formed. The only people who really understood were the people who had been through those experiences.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“psychologists coined the term “mum effect” for when people avoid sharing bad news.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“We all deal with loss: jobs lost, loves lost, lives lost. The question is not whether these things will happen. They will, and we will have to face them.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“I thought I was terrible at everything, but it turns out I was only terrible at spreadsheets.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“The first noble truth of Buddhism is that all life involves suffering. Aging, sickness, and loss are inevitable. And while life includes some joyful moments, despite our attempts to make them last, they too will dissolve.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“turning to God gives people a sense of being enveloped in loving arms that are eternal and ultimately strong. People need to know that they are not alone.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“Option A is not available. So let’s just kick the shit out of Option B.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B

“Resilience is not just built in individuals. It is built among individuals—in our neighborhoods, schools, towns, and governments. When we build resilience together, we become stronger ourselves and form communities that can overcome obstacles and prevent adversity. Collective resilience requires more than just shared hope—it is also fueled by shared experiences, shared narratives, and shared power.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“Moral elevation" describes the feeling of being uplifted by an act of uncommon goodness. Elevation brings out what Abraham Lincoln called "the better angels of our nature." Even in the face of atrocity, elevation leads us to look at our similarities instead of our differences. We see the potential for good in others and gain hope that we can survive and rebuild. We become inspired to express compassion and battle injustice. As Martin Luther King Jr. said, "Let no man pull you so low as to hate him.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“Blaming our actions rather than our character allows us to feel guilt instead of shame.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“When you’re faced with tragedy,18 you usually find that you’re no longer surrounded by people—you’re surrounded by platitudes.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

“be asking instead how I could become resilient. Resilience is the strength and speed of our response to adversity—and we can build it. It isn’t about having a backbone. It’s about strengthening the muscles around our backbone.”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy