Lily and the Octopus Quotes

“It's natural, as our loved ones age, to start grieving their loss. Even before we lose them.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“To focus, I think of how dogs are witnesses. How they are present for our most private moments, how they are there when we think of ourselves as alone. They witness our quarrels, our tears, our struggles, our fears, and all of our secret behaviors that we have to hide from our fellow humans. They witness without judgment.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“A heart is judged not by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Because dogs live in the present. Because dogs don’t hold grudges. Because dogs let go of all of their anger daily, hourly, and never let it fester. They absolve and forgive with each passing minute. Every turn of a corner is the opportunity for a clean slate. Every bounce of a ball brings joy and the promise of a fresh chase.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Someone once said give a dog food and shelter and treats and they think you are a god, but give a cat the same and they think they are the god.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“If you spend your entire life trying to cheat death, there's no time left over to embrace life.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“The very best thing about dogs is how they just know when you need them most, and they’ll drop everything that they’re doing to sit with you awhile. I”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Most of all, I am thankful for Lily, who, since she entered my life, has taught me everything I know about patience and kindness and meeting adversity with quiet dignity and grace. No one makes me laugh harder, or want to hug them tighter. You have truly lived up to the promise of man’s best friend.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Dogs are always good and full of selfless love. They are undiluted vessels of joy who never, ever deserve anything bad that happens to them.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“I have to be better about living in the not knowing.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“After a pause Lily looks up at me. “Sometimes I think of you as Dad.” My heart rises in my throat. That’s the only term of endearment I need.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Yours is by far the harder lot, but mine is happening to me.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“To die would be an awfully big adventure. But it’s not true. Life is the real adventure. Having the hurricane inside you is the true adventure. And then I think not of Cate Blanchett as Queen Elizabeth I, but of Mel Gibson as William Wallace. Everyone dies. Not everyone really lives.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Grief is a pathological condition. It’s just that so many of us go through it in life that we never think to treat it as such.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“She taught me everything I know about patience, kindness, strength, and unconditional love. For that, I am forever in her debt. Lily, you were, quite simply, the greatest to me.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“The distribution of loss is inequitable. That's just the way it is. That's just the way the world works. There's no one handing it out. There's no one making sure everyone gets a fair share.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Somewhere, sometime, I stopped really living. I stopped really trying. And I don't understand why.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Okay.' I can feel the letters vomit off my tongue.
O.
K.
A.
Y.
I watch the vet insert the syringe into the catheter and inject the second drug. And then the adventures come flooding back:

The puppy farm.
The gentle untying of the shoelace.
THIS! IS! MY! HOME! NOW!
Our first night together.
Running on the beach.
Sadie and Sophie and Sophie Dee.
Shared ice-cream cones.
Thanksgivings.
Tofurky.
Car rides.
Laughter.
Eye rain.
Chicken and rice.
Paralysis.
Surgery.
Christmases.
Walks.
Dog parks.
Squirrel chasing.
Naps.
Snuggling.
'Fishful Thinking.'
The adventure at sea.
Gentle kisses.
Manic kisses.
More eye rain.
So much eye rain.
Red ball.

The veterinarian holds a stethoscope up to Lily's chest, listening for her heartbeat.
All dogs go to heaven.
'Your mother's name is Witchie-Poo.' I stroke Lily behind her ears the way that used to calm her. 'Look for her.'
OH FUCK IT HURTS.
I barely whisper. 'She will take care of you.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“How do you stand?
How do you breathe?
How do you go on?”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Today me will live in the moment, unless it’s unpleasant, in which case me will eat a cookie.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“And then on the very last night of my twenties, when I held my new puppy in my arms, I broke down in tears. Because I had fallen in love. Not somewhat in love. Not partly in love. Not in a limited amount. I fell fully in love with a creature I had known for all of nine hours. I”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“I don’t understand how my life got so empty, or why the octopus came, or why everyone eventually goes away.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“When I held my new puppy in my arms, I broke down in tears. Because I had fallen in love. Not somewhat in love. Not partly in love. Not in a limited amount. I fell fully in love with a creature I had known for all of nine hours.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“I don’t know the derivation of this comfort craving, but there’s a quote from Cookie Monster that’s always inhabited my head: 'Today me will live in the moment, unless it’s unpleasant, in which case me will eat a cookie.' While I don’t take all of my mantras from goggle-eyed blue monsters with questionable grammar, this one has taken root. Lately I’ve been craving cookies a lot.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Jenny and I once talked about how we manage to live despite the knowledge that we are all going to die. What's the point of it all? Why bother getting up in the morning when faced with such futility? Or is it the promise of death that inspires life? That we must grab what we can while there's still time? Is it the not knowing if today is the day that keeps us going? But what if this is the day? What if the hour is here? How do you stand? How do you breathe? How do you go on?”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“But until this night, she had never once actually wet the bed. And now that she has, we just lie there in the accident, and the minutes of the clock keep changing, and the love I have for her keeps growing, and we both keep drawing breath.
What was so horrible about it? Why had I always been so angry? What was my need to always be right? To win every argument with her? To out-stubborn a dog?
And just like that, all the anger is gone. Released like the emptying of a bladder into soft cotton sheets as we lie in the wetness.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“I think of how dogs are witnesses. How they are present for our most private moments, how they are there when we think of ourselves as alone. They witness our quarrels, our tears, our struggles, our fears, and all of our secret behaviors that we have to hide from our fellow humans. They witness without judgment.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“There's no shame in surrender when it's time to stop fighting.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“Since I am in this pain, the pain of having what is special taken from me, I look inside myself and I don’t like what I see: a man who is broken and alone. I think of all the time Lily and I spent together, just the two of us—the talks about boys, the Monopoly, the movies, the pizza nights—and I wonder how much of it was real. Dogs don’t eat pizza; dogs don’t play Monopoly. I know this on some level, but everything feels so true. How much of it was an elaborate construct to mask my own loneliness? How much of it was built to convince myself the attempts I made at real life—therapy, dating—were not just that: attempts?”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus

“What’s wrong with Tuesdays?” Trent asks. “Everything. Monday’s always Monday, but at least it’s the start of something new. Wednesday is hump day, Thursday’s almost Friday, and Friday brings the weekend. But Tuesday? Nada.”
― Steven Rowley, Lily and the Octopus