I Want to Go Home! Quotes

“I have it all figured out scientifically,” said Rudy, his eyes gleaming. “Biologically, in fact. You see, Silver Lake is a girls’ camp. Therefore, they have girl clones. Once the dancing starts, our clones, being of the male persuasion, will devote all their attention to the female clones. With the loud music and everything, we could probably stand at the door and wave and yell ‘toodle-oo’ and they’d never notice us. That’s if we go at all. I have a feeling Chip won’t let us.”
― Gordon Korman, I Want to Go Home!

“Dear Mom and Dad,
This place is terrible. Each day I am subjected to countless atrocities. The food is spoiled and poisonous, and the drinking water is contaminated so there is an outbreak of typhoid. Our cabin collapsed last night in a typhoon, but don’t worry. Only one guy was killed.

It’s not all bad. I do have one friend, named Mike. He’s the one who pulled me out of the quicksand. I have to haul garbage every day, but there aren’t too many wild animals at the dump and I’ve only been bitten twice.

Mr. Warden, the director, is very nice, and he has a real social conscience. He hires only desperate criminals as counsellors. Our bunk counsellor, whose name is Chip, is a reformed axe-murderer on parole. He has red eyes and yells a lot and keeps an axe under his mattress.

Tonight is going to be really fun. Our cabin hasn’t been fixed yet, so we get to sleep in trees. I sure hope the typhoon doesn’t start up again.

I’ll be safe and sound so long as Algonkian Island doesn’t sink any further. …

P.S. If this letter looks messy it’s because I’m writing it while being chased by a bear.”
― Gordon Korman, I Want to Go Home!