Kat

“Hell needed horribly bright, self-centered people like Eric. They were much better at being nasty than demons could ever manage”
― Terry Pratchett, Eric

“We may perhaps go even further, and save both Holmes' responsibility and Watson's Hippocratic oath, by speculating whether perhaps Dr Grimesby Roylott did not die from snake poison at all, but from apoplexy brought on by his herculean efforts to whistle back a deaf and unresponsive reptile, aided by general exhaustion caused by too frequent indulgence in poker bending.”
― D. Martin Dakin

“The key to excellent report writing' he said between chews, 'is to take every bit of passion out of it. Use an extra heaping portion of superflously extraneous tautological redundancies in order to make it mind-numbingly boring. So that when one's superior officers read it, they zone out and start skimming and maybe don't notice the fact that one has been spinning one's wheels since the body turned up and hasn't solved a goddamn thing.”
― Jonathan Kellerman, Private Eyes

“Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.”
― Terry Pratchett, Hogfather