Ely

“It turned out I was pretty good in science. But again, because of the small budget, in science class we couldn't afford to do experiments in order to prove theories. We just believed everything. Actually, I think that class was called Religion. Religion class was always an easy class. All you had to do was suspend the logic and reasoning you were being taught in all the other classes.”
― George Carlin, Brain Droppings

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
― Oscar Wilde

“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?”
― George Carlin

“The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
― George Carlin