John Lackore

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Eoin Colfer
“Who are you?" he asked.
I am the future queen of this world, at the very least. You may refer to me as Mistress Koboi for the next five minutes. After that you may refer to me as Aaaaarrrrgh, hold your throat, die screaming, and so on.”
Eoin Colfer, The Time Paradox

Eoin Colfer
“Artemis: (shocked) Why, Doctor? This is a sensitive area. For all you know I could be suffering from depression.
Doctor Po: I suppose you could. Is that the case?
Artemis: (head in hands) It's my mother, Doctor.
Doctor Po: Yes?
Artemis: My mother, she...
Doctor Po: Your mother, yes?
Artemis: She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy when the school's so-called counsellors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees.”
Eoin Colfer, The Arctic Incident

Eoin Colfer
“If I win, I'm a prodigy. If I lose, then I'm crazy. That's the way history is written.”
Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

Eoin Colfer
“Listen to me, goblin. You're stupid, let's accept that and move on.”
Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code

Eoin Colfer
“I am unarmed. But Butler here, my ...ah...butler, has a Sig Saucer in his shoulder holster, two shrike-throwing knives in his boots, aderringer two-shot up his sleeve, garrotte wire in his watch, and three stun greanades concealed in variouse pockets. Anything else, Butler?”
Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

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