Mrscaleb

“Do you ever get moods when life seems absolutely meaningless? It's like a badly-constructed story, with all sorts of characters moving in and out who have nothing to do with the plot. And when somebody comes along that you think really has something to do with the plot, he suddenly drops out. After a while you begin to wonder what the story is about, and you feel that it's about nothing—just a jumble.”
― P.G. Wodehouse

“It ought to be a criminal offence for women to dye their hair. Especially red. What the devil do women do that sort of thing for?”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Indiscretions of Archie

“A dog without influence or private means, if he is to make his way in the world, must have either good looks or amiability.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, The Man with Two Left Feet and Other Stories

“You won't mind my calling you Comrade, will you? I've just become a socialist. It's a great scheme. You ought to be one. You work for the equal distribution of property, and start by collaring all you can and sitting on it.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Mike and Psmith