Mrscaleb > Mrscaleb's Quotes

“You're one of those guys who can make a party just by leaving it. It's a great gift.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, The Girl in Blue

“Do you ever get moods when life seems absolutely meaningless? It's like a badly-constructed story, with all sorts of characters moving in and out who have nothing to do with the plot. And when somebody comes along that you think really has something to do with the plot, he suddenly drops out. After a while you begin to wonder what the story is about, and you feel that it's about nothing—just a jumble.”
― P.G. Wodehouse

“It ought to be a criminal offence for women to dye their hair. Especially red. What the devil do women do that sort of thing for?”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Indiscretions of Archie

“If she ever turned into a werewolf, it would be one of those jolly breezy werewolves whom it is a pleasure to know.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Aunts Aren't Gentlemen

“You won't mind my calling you Comrade, will you? I've just become a socialist. It's a great scheme. You ought to be one. You work for the equal distribution of property, and start by collaring all you can and sitting on it.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Mike and Psmith

“Have you ever seen a man, woman, or child who wasn’t eating an egg or just going to eat an egg or just coming away from eating an egg? I tell you, the good old egg is the foundation of daily life. Stop the first man you meet in the street and ask him which he’d sooner lose, his egg or his wife, and see what he says!”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Love Among the Chickens

“A dog without influence or private means, if he is to make his way in the world, must have either good looks or amiability.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, The Man with Two Left Feet and Other Stories

“she was usually keenly susceptible to weather conditions and reveled in sunshine like a kitten.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Something New

“It was one of those still evenings you get in the summer, when you can hear a snail clear its throat a mile away.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Carry On, Jeeves

“As an energetic Socialist, I do my best to see the good that is in him, but it's hard. Comrade Bristow's the most striking argument against the equality of man I've ever come across.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Psmith in the City

“But a thing I’ve often noticed is that when I’ve got something off my mind, it pretty nearly always happens that Fate sidles up and shoves on something else,”
― P.G. Wodehouse, The Jeeves Omnibus Vol. 4