sof ♡

“Remember the first time we kissed? he said. At the party. And I said I didn’t think the utility room was a good place to be kissing and we left. You know I went up to my room and waited for you, right? I mean for hours. And at first I really thought you would come. It was probably the most wretched I ever felt in my life, this kind of ecstatic wretchedness that in a way I was practically enjoying. Because even if you did come upstairs, what then? The house was full of people, it’s not like anything was going to happen. But every time I thought of going back down again I would imagine hearing you on the stairs, and I couldn’t leave, I mean I physically couldn’t. Anyway, how I felt then, knowing that you were close by and feeling completely paralyzed by it, this phone call was similar. If I told you where my car was right now, I don’t think I’d be able to leave, I think I would have to stay here just in case you changed your mind about everything. You know, I still have that impulse to be available to you. You'll notice I didn't buy anything in the supermarket.”
― Sally Rooney, Conversations with Friends

“I need to be whole again. Even if it doesn’t last.”
“It can’t last,” she said, staring at him, because how could it, when they could never keep what they had? “It’ll break our hearts.”
He caught her by the wrist, brought her hand to his bare chest. Splayed her fingers over his heart. It beat against her palm, like a fist punching its way through his sternum. “Break my heart,” he said. “Break it in pieces. I give you permission.”
― Cassandra Clare, Lord of Shadows

“There's something about a place you've been with someone you love. It takes on a meaning in your mind. It becomes more than a place. It becomes a distillation of what you felt for each other. The moments you spend in a place with someone... they become part of its bricks and mortar. Part of its soul.”
― Cassandra Clare, Lord of Shadows

“You can keep walking away from this, and I’m going to keep letting you, because even when you think you leave, your heard always stays, and it’s something I carry with pride, and it’s something I don’t…” He paused, his gaze tearing away from mine for a second, his voice thick with emotion. “It’s something I don’t fuck with. Ever. So if you feel like you need a break, I’ll give you a break, but don’t think for a second I’m not coming after you again, Mia. And I swear to God, the next time I do, it’s forever.”
― Claire Contreras, Paper Hearts