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Mark Twain
“Often, the less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it.”
Mark Twain, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer

Randall Munroe
“what year did a single typical desktop computer surpass the combined processing power of humanity? 1994.”
Randall Munroe, What If? 10th Anniversary Edition: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions

Oscar Wilde
“Humanity takes itself too seriously. It is the world's original sin. If the caveman had known how to laugh, history would have been different.”
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

Suzanne Kelman
“He squinted and said, “Hmmm,” which translated from “male” means, “I don’t actually agree with that idea, but I don’t have a comeback line to common sense.”
Suzanne Kelman, The Rejected Writers' Book Club

Oscar Wilde
“Even when one has been wounded by it, Harry?" asked the duchess after a pause. "Especially when one has been wounded by it," answered Lord Henry.”
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

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