This is not The Haters Club You're Looking For discussion
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I hate that I’m going thru a hate dry…
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Well at this point I suggest sleeping medication if your going that crazy, Alfonso. As for the sweat dripping down your ass crack...
Ooohh... that's cold Seth... cold... I've been in the position where my new boss fired me (and the whole dept.) so that he could bring his own people to fill in the positions.
We didn't care because we didn't want to work with him anyway. We just smiled as his "people" and eventually him, got fired one by one because the "whole team" didn't perform.
Isn't German porn mostly scat videos and old guys getting it on with young girls? (Or so I've been told.) Dutch porn is a much better choice. (Again, I've been told.)
whoa its like christmas is coming twice this year
Until he gets here I can tell you about my crappy day. I had to drive to San Bernardino and my car A/C broke. This is the second car this has happened to. Is it something I'm doing? Why do the gods of automotive A/C hate me?
UGH! You can't be serious! AGAIN with the A/C? Something is up dude. And you don't have to STAND for it! You'd better be calling up ALL CAPS! GRRRRR!
It's a Honda, but thanks for the support.
No problem.(I started Message 18 as "Did you ever consider the fact that it might be an operator error?" but then I thought that was too mean.)
You think he's on a date?Alfonso! You'd better speak up, pal!!!
i'm writing a report give me a sec!
Alfonso’s report on Alfonso’s crappy day:So I mange to sleep for like2 hours when that evil machine known as the “alarm clock” started screaming at me for no damn reason… so I do the traditional fuck you! You stupid piece of shit!!! don’t tell me what to do… and hit the snooze thingy… 2 minutes later it started screaming at me again!!! I hate that little shit!!! is like a pocket bitch!! So I decided to wake up… when I was shaving looking at my pretty but tired face in the mirror I decided that if I was going to a new store… I should look “pretty” so after I finish doing my hair I put on my “sexy” taco bell pants my good shirt, and I even throw some of that cologne that my aunt gave me!!!
I went to the bodega in the corner and ordered my traditional “holy shit I’ma have a bad day“special…. Meaning one pack of Marlboro red, one energy bar, and one can of monster (you should see people’s faces when they see me buying that, is hilarious!!)…. So after eating my breakfast special I take my bus and started reading…. When I saw my stop and got off… only that it wasn’t my stop… I was still kind of sleepy so I got off in the wrong stop!!! (It took me like 10 mins to figure this out!!) So back to the bus and to my true stop… (I set the alarm 30 minutes early anticipating this…)
So I get to the store with 2 minutes to spare!!! But there was nobody there yet… and I still don’t have a key… I’m like oh fuck it! I’ma just sit and wait for the guy to get here… I’ma sit next to that hot chick and read my book…(in my delusional world chicks dig readers) ( when I sit there she like yeah the manager is going to be late… and I’m like I’m sorry? and she says: he is usually 10-15 minutes late all the time… ok this is the part where I explain how yesterday Jazzy attached something to my name tag… something like “Alfonso you rokk + I <3 you. Jazzy.”* Now the reason why I explain his is to let ya’ll know what an ass hole I am… as soon as she says that she works there… I started to turn my name tag so she didn’t notice Jazzy’s little note.(I hated myself for like 3 seconds then I looked at her beautiful hands and I changed my mind…)
Ok so after 14 mins the manager shows up… We get in and well I was freaking out… nothing was shiny… I could not see my reflection on the soda machine… there were yellow rags on the back!!!!!! ON THE BACK!!!! Only one 3 ounces scoop… no dates on some of the food!!!! I grabbed the prep guide and it said Monday!!!!!! I was hyperventilating… completely freaking out y’all!! And then something beautiful happened I was informed that the inspection that they were waiting for happen the night before… and they didn’t score high… I was supposed to go there and train this people so that didn’t happen… but alas! I was too late!!! So my GM called from my store and said that he needs me… and I was like OHHH GOOGLE YES!!! I’m out of here… I mean I wanted to work with the hot chick… but so much shit wrong…. Was just driving me insane… so they offer a cap and I refused… cuz well I like my bus!!! I grabbed my book and I was out of there!
I get to my store… when everything was going down to hell!!! 2 call outs and the rest of the people coming that day were trainees…. But I was there so there was nothing to worry about after all I’m The fucking Takonator… and then the phone rings…. And is the RGM… who is in the other store… and really piss off! Cuz well he wanted me there… and I was not!!! I didn’t listen to the conversation… but his what I think they said: RGM: WHERE THE FUCK IS THE TAKONATOR? GM: he is here… they don’t need him any more over there… and I’m short on people here… and he is the best man… RGM: I WANT THE TAKONATOR HERE!!! NOW!!! GM: sure… The Takonator is on his way…
So after that I was sent on a fucking cap… (Caps drivers always want to talk… and I want to read my book…. So I don’t get car sick) so after hearing the traditional I have more than one women story from the Dominican cap driver…. I got there… and it was sad… the fired the GM… I left for 2 hours and when I came back nothing was shiny!!! This people don’t seem to know what procedure is… they don’t know why we are suppose to follow it to the letter… so long story short… I still going to be working there for 3 weeks and in my store… so my life is so sad!!! But the hot chick is there so who knows what my happen!!
*: I ain’t dating Jazzy she was just being cute… but hot girl didn’t know that!
So I'm trying to translate this. You will with new hot chick for 3 weeks only and during this 3 weeks you have to still go to your own store and hang with Jazzy?And you still need to watch German porn with your sock puppet? Alfonso, Alfonso my boy. You're too busy shining up those counters!
Ok so this was 23 days ago... what came of it anything?
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This is not The Haters Club You're Looking For
Books mentioned in this topic
The Elegance of the Hedgehog (other topics)The Unbearable Lightness of Being (other topics)
When Nietzsche Wept (other topics)
I hate that drop of swet that runs thru my back all the way down to my ass crack!!! Is uncomfortable and there is no way in hell that you can stop it without making people look at you funny!!! Especially when you making their food!!! But hello people is fucking 90 degrees and I’m standing in front of a giant thermalizer that is boiling at 200 fucking degrees!!!! Stupid summer!
I hate those soft-core porn movies on HBO… they make my penis softer!!! And the sex specials… wtf is 3 am I don’t want to see ugly old people wearing diapers… is wrong!!! Wrong I tell you!!!
And finally I hate the fact that I accepted my promotion…. Now I’m supposed to go to this other store and fix everything that is wrong with it…. it never pays off to be good at something!!! I don’t wanna go there! I don’t know em… and I’m scared as hell of failing!!! Buaaaaaaaaaaaa I’m so nervous that I can’t even fucking sleep and I need to be up at 6!!!!