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Polls for This is not The Haters Club You're Looking For. Showing 1-30 of 523
created Dec 18, 2011 08:10PM PST poll #1
58257
In 2011, I spent my money on...

Books
 
  12 votes, 48.0%

Electronics
 
  5 votes, 20.0%

Tobacco
 
  3 votes, 12.0%

Alcohol
 
  3 votes, 12.0%

Firearms
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

Movies
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 15, 2011 10:29AM PST poll #2
The following are titles that will be released in January. Which are you most likely to read?

The Shirtless Cowboy Who Alternates Between Holding Babies And Giving It To The Hot, Lonely Wives Of Other, Emotionally Distant Men, Usually Out Of Doors
 
  8 votes, 32.0%

The Unabridged, Unedited Tome Of Something Spooky That Took Place In A Small Town In Maine
 
  4 votes, 16.0%

The Flaming Sword of Revn-T'aherrill And The Half-Man, Half-Badger
 
  4 votes, 16.0%

The Girl Who Spit On A Cop In Riot Gear, Took A Baton To The Kidneys, And Pissed Blood For A Week
 
  3 votes, 12.0%

The Handsy Proctologist's Daughter
 
  3 votes, 12.0%

The Cat That Likes To Watch Her Owner Doin' It As She Licks Herself
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

N Is For "No Way, You Guys Are Still Paying Me To Write These Shitty Alphabet Mystery Books?"
 
  1 vote, 4.0%


created Dec 14, 2011 01:01PM PST poll #3
Most disgusting bizarro Kit-Kat flavor. Thanks a lot, Japan.

all of them! the fuck is wrong with the japanese!?
 
  9 votes, 36.0%

Apple Vinegar
 
  4 votes, 16.0%

Wasabi
 
  3 votes, 12.0%

Soy Sauce
 
  3 votes, 12.0%

Yuzu and Pepper
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

Camambert Cheese
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

Grilled Corn
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

Baked Potato
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

Earl Grey Tea
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Fruit Parfait
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 13, 2011 08:48PM PST poll #4
What is it about the GREEN BAY PACKERS that makes them so awesome?

What sport is this?
 
  7 votes, 36.8%

They're the only publicly owned sports franchise in the US.
 
  3 votes, 15.8%

They're not Dallas.
 
  2 votes, 10.5%

Clay Matthews looks like a Norse god.
 
  2 votes, 10.5%

All of the above, except the "what sport is this" one.
 
  2 votes, 10.5%

GO COWBOYS!!
 
  1 vote, 5.3%

Da Bears!
 
  1 vote, 5.3%

Because their fans choke their children.
 
  1 vote, 5.3%

Aaron Rodgers is a MACHINE. Brett who?
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

They're gonna win another Super Bowl this year.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

COWBOYS suck!!!
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

They're AMERICA'S TEAM.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

The history. They won the first Super Bowl! And the last one! And more in between, and NFL championships before that.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Lambeau Field. Frozen Tundra, baby.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 13, 2011 10:19AM PST poll #5
Best animated film. Submit write in suggestions in the comments, cause I ain't allowin' none of that anime crap.

How to Train Your Dragon
 
  3 votes, 42.9%

The Iron Giant
 
  2 votes, 28.6%

Toy Story
 
  2 votes, 28.6%

Snow White and the Seven Dwarves
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Beauty and the Beast
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Up
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

The Lion King
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 12, 2011 09:45PM PST poll #6
57974
Smetchie "aspirated" a small piece of hot sausage this evening and then came here to tell us about it. What is the appropriate response?

Stunned silence.
 
  5 votes, 50.0%

If it's small enough to aspirate, you shouldn't have had that sausage in your mouth in the first place.
 
  2 votes, 20.0%

And you thought spit and swallow were the only options.
 
  1 vote, 10.0%

Was it carefully aged 15 year old sausage?
 
  1 vote, 10.0%

why?!?
 
  1 vote, 10.0%

Choke on sausage often?
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Don't gobble so much at once.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 10, 2011 04:14PM PST poll #7
Ok! Time to show some love!!

Who is your favorite MOD??

Smetchie!
 
  6 votes, 33.3%

Kristina!
 
  4 votes, 22.2%

Alfonso!
 
  4 votes, 22.2%

Rusty!
 
  4 votes, 22.2%


created Dec 10, 2011 07:49AM PST poll #8
Fuck those love nazis from the other poll!! I'm making a real one! That will be free! Like love!! Which movie you think is the greatest love story!?

The first 20 minutes of Up.
 
  4 votes, 33.3%

Brokeback Mountain
 
  2 votes, 16.7%

Zombieland
 
  2 votes, 16.7%

The Human Centipede
 
  2 votes, 16.7%

Wall-E
 
  1 vote, 8.3%

The Passion
 
  1 vote, 8.3%

Evangelion Death and Rebirth
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

"The Dirty Thirty"- Poolside Orgy #7
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 09, 2011 08:28PM PST poll #9
Greatest love story of all time.



No write ins. This is my poll fuckers and the only options are movies I've seen. Vote for one of the choices I give you or abstain and bitch in the comments section. This isn't a goddamned democracy.

Brokeback Mountain
 
  7 votes, 31.8%

Pride and Prejudice
 
  6 votes, 27.3%

Dirty Dancing
 
  6 votes, 27.3%

Sleepless in Seattle
 
  3 votes, 13.6%

Romeo and Juliet
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Tin Cup
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Return to Me
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 09, 2011 10:19AM PST poll #10
Who wins in November 2012?

Barack Obama. He is the black FDR, Lincoln, JFK, Teddy Roosevelt, Ronald Reagan
 
  9 votes, 45.0%

Listen, I'm being very serious right now. We need to leave Obama in the White House. All he needs is another 4-12 years to achieve what he has set out in his agenda.
 
  3 votes, 15.0%

I still want Hillary, dammit!
 
  3 votes, 15.0%

Bah! I care nothing for your American politics.
 
  2 votes, 10.0%

Gingrich. He's smart, aggressive and he probably hasn't cheated in years.
 
  1 vote, 5.0%

Ron Paul. He sticks to his guns, adheres to the Constitution, and I'm sure there's a White House staffer who can make him look less like a claymation packrat.
 
  1 vote, 5.0%

Romney. He is well-spoken, experienced and pretty.
 
  1 vote, 5.0%

Michelle Bachman. She's smart and she's tough.*


*For a woman.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

For the love of Xena, please people, anybody but BO. He is the black Jimmy Carter and the economy is his water-born rabbit.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Huntsman. He has experience reaching across the aisle and has experience working with the Chinese, who will undoubtedly play a part in the nation's future, and uuuuuuhhhh....his teeth are really white.

Sorry, don't know much about this guy.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 07, 2011 01:52PM PST poll #11
Who (besides Nick) has gone soft?

all of the above
 
  4 votes, 20.0%

Alfonoso. He comes around to play cyber grab-ass with his nerd blood brother.........errrrr sister, then returns to his real-life circle jerk.
 
  4 votes, 20.0%

Gretchen. She logs in mainly to jump in on her virtual sewing circle jerk, where she can swap nasty-ass recipes and express her sloppy love for everyone. I keep expecting her to start ending posts with "xoxo". It's probably just a sign of old age.
 
  3 votes, 15.0%

The new kids. I need to see more bile, more instability, more twitching and gnashing.
 
  2 votes, 10.0%

RUSTY. For whining about everyone going soft. Whining is for kindergarteners my friend, quit being a pansy!
 
  2 votes, 10.0%

Oddrun. All you can think to hate on is Christmas trees and the weather? I might as well call grandma.
 
  1 vote, 5.0%

Esteban. That's not fair though, because I can rarely decode his garbled posts, with their occasional racial epithets and frequent references to things that probably don't exist.
 
  1 vote, 5.0%

Rusty. Bitching about your milktoast suburbanite existence, and occasionally calling a hippie a hippie does not cut it.
 
  1 vote, 5.0%

Brokeback Mountain
 
  1 vote, 5.0%

Tom. Come on. The guy tried to give up THC for Lent, hoping that his positive vibes would power his Prius.
 
  1 vote, 5.0%

Kristina. She has definitely gone soft, but at least she's not going on and on about her epidermal STD anymore.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Megan. Well, I suppose she does okay when we can drag her away from the dude on dude erotica. Apparently she's trying to keep Cristy in business single-handedly.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 07, 2011 01:00AM PST poll #12
Which hypothetical movie would you most want to watch?

Harry Potter 957: Mecha Godzilla and the Rechargeable Battery of Plenty
 
  5 votes, 31.3%

Saving Private Ryan II: I've Got Your GI Bill Right Here, Washington
 
  3 votes, 18.8%

Batman: Dark Knight Whatever
 
  2 votes, 12.5%

Godzilla vs Gamera
 
  2 votes, 12.5%

Hannibal Lecter: The Rest Home Years
 
  2 votes, 12.5%

Star Wars VII: Now With More CGI!
 
  1 vote, 6.3%

Star Trek 90210
 
  1 vote, 6.3%


created Dec 07, 2011 12:38AM PST poll #13
What is the best Movie for the Holidays/Christmas?

A Christmas Story
 
  4 votes, 22.2%

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
 
  3 votes, 16.7%

Scrooged
 
  3 votes, 16.7%

Home Alone
 
  2 votes, 11.1%

It is a Wonderful Life
 
  1 vote, 5.6%

Bad Santa
 
  1 vote, 5.6%

White Christmas
 
  1 vote, 5.6%

The Snowman
 
  1 vote, 5.6%

Nightmare Before Christmas
 
  1 vote, 5.6%

Movie? There's football on!
 
  1 vote, 5.6%

A Christmas Carol-version your choice
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Dinner For One (Tradition in Germany)
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Miracle on 34th Street
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Die Hard
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Trading Places
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

1941
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Elf
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Seven Samurai
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Joyeux Noel
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 06, 2011 07:19PM PST poll #14
What new hater thread would you most like to see?

Nick returns to give everyone a proper hazing and all this nicey nice shit is finally put to an end.
 
  11 votes, 52.4%

Myles graphs the Twilight love triangle.
 
  5 votes, 23.8%

Melons finally admits that she's actually a man and Alfonso likes it.
 
  2 votes, 9.5%

Brokeback Mountain
 
  2 votes, 9.5%

Crusty, Christine, and Charity fight about the best C name and debate traditional vs. non-traditional spellings.
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

Charity talks about writing erotica and Greg acts like a creeper.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 05, 2011 10:01PM PST poll #15
Best war movie.

The Dirty Dozen
 
  5 votes, 23.8%

Saving Private Ryan
 
  5 votes, 23.8%

Glory
 
  3 votes, 14.3%

I don't care, really, but i'm still going to bitch because ________ was left off this list.
 
  2 votes, 9.5%

Apocalypse Now
 
  2 votes, 9.5%

Inglourious Bastards
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

shit this is hard!! (twss)
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

Bridge On The River Kwai
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

We Were Soldiers
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

Sands of Iwo Jima
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Patton
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

The Great Escape
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

300
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Where Eagles Dare
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Kelly's Heroes
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Brokeback Mountain
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

All Quiet On The Western Front
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Sargeant York
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 05, 2011 10:26AM PST poll #16
57627
Which movie franchise took the biggest nosedive in quality?

The Matrix
 
  10 votes, 40.0%

Star Wars
 
  8 votes, 32.0%

The Godfather
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

Hellraiser
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

The Land Before Time
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

Some long list of movies that are vastly more appropriate for this poll.
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

Star Trek
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

Jaws
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Rocky
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Hannibal
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Dec 02, 2011 02:36PM PST poll #17
Best chick flick.

Love Actually
 
  6 votes, 24.0%

When Harry met Somebody or other. Hell, I don't know any chick flicks.
 
  4 votes, 16.0%

The Princess Bride Tomisadouche
 
  3 votes, 12.0%

Seriously? That's like asking what's the best flavor vomit.
 
  3 votes, 12.0%

The Notebook
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

Clueless
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

How the fuck would I know?!!!
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

Bridget Jones's Diary
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

As Good As It Gets
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

black swan!
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

Thelma and Louise
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

Naughty Reunion
 
  1 vote, 4.0%


created Nov 30, 2011 08:38AM PST poll #18
What's the best reason to hate Americans?

Their awesomeness is so intimidating and overpowering, that beholding it is akin to staring into the white hot heart of a supernova.
 
  8 votes, 32.0%

Jersey Shore. Kardashians. Lady Gaga. Need I say more?
 
  6 votes, 24.0%

All of the above, without counting nr 3.
 
  4 votes, 16.0%

"American" food is just food from other places, with less flavor and more grease.
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

They refuse to learn a second language.
 
  2 votes, 8.0%

They're fat and loud.
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

They are not the French!
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

They take culture and customs from around the world and bastardize them.
 
  1 vote, 4.0%

They all think they're fecking cowboys.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

They think they're awesome.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

They're always throwing up good liquor.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 30, 2011 06:16AM PST poll #19
Best Cowboy movie.

Tombstone
 
  8 votes, 36.4%

Unforgiven
 
  4 votes, 18.2%

The Magnificent Seven
 
  3 votes, 13.6%

3:10 to Yuma
 
  3 votes, 13.6%

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
 
  2 votes, 9.1%

The Outlaw Josie Wales
 
  1 vote, 4.5%

For a Few Dollars More
 
  1 vote, 4.5%

Rio Bravo
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

A Fistful of Dollars
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Pale Rider
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 28, 2011 10:59AM PST poll #20
What is the best impersonal gift I can give family/friends/coworkers/employers this joyous Christmas season?

Candle
 
  3 votes, 18.8%

Butt plug / anal beads
 
  3 votes, 18.8%

Lotion
 
  3 votes, 18.8%

Any gift basket from Wal-Mart or Target that is under $15.
 
  3 votes, 18.8%

Gift Card
 
  2 votes, 12.5%

pocket knife
 
  1 vote, 6.3%

Tie
 
  1 vote, 6.3%


created Nov 23, 2011 06:49AM PST poll #21
Most epic eyebrows:

[image error]
 
  6 votes, 20.7%

[image error]
 
  5 votes, 17.2%

[image error]
 
  4 votes, 13.8%

[image error]
 
  3 votes, 10.3%

Brooke Shields
 
  3 votes, 10.3%

[image error]
 
  3 votes, 10.3%

[image error]
 
  2 votes, 6.9%

[image error]
 
  2 votes, 6.9%

DeForest Kelly aka Dr. Leonard "Bones" McCoy MD
 
  1 vote, 3.4%

[image error]
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

[image error]
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 22, 2011 10:53AM PST poll #22
Does fruit or fruit bits belong in stuffing?

Nay
 
  16 votes, 76.2%

Yay
 
  5 votes, 23.8%


created Nov 22, 2011 07:00AM PST poll #23
Best Southern food that has yet to achieve widespread popularity outside the South.

Fried okra.
 
  7 votes, 31.8%

Collard greens.
 
  5 votes, 22.7%

Grits and shrimp.
 
  4 votes, 18.2%

Pimento cheese.
 
  2 votes, 9.1%

Chitlins.
 
  1 vote, 4.5%

Pork rinds.
 
  1 vote, 4.5%

Jambalaya?
 
  1 vote, 4.5%

Boiled peanuts.
 
  1 vote, 4.5%

Grits and gravy.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 17, 2011 08:35AM PST poll #24
Best Quote?

"Freedom of speech should be tempered by the right to punch jackasses in the face.”
 
  5 votes, 23.8%

"Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened."
 
  5 votes, 23.8%

"Life's hard. It's even harder when you're stupid."
 
  5 votes, 23.8%

"Facts are stubborn things."
 
  2 votes, 9.5%

"People are not like chocolates. Most people are just bastard-covered bastards with bastard filling."
 
  2 votes, 9.5%

"I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally."
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

"I'm not just anti-hippie; I'm the Anti-Christ of hippies."
 
  1 vote, 4.8%


created Nov 16, 2011 09:34AM PST poll #25
Explain yourself!

I thought you'd be into it.
 
  5 votes, 35.7%

What the hell are we talking about?
 
  4 votes, 28.6%

I took my pants off to decrease wind resistance. I don't know what the big deal is.
 
  2 votes, 14.3%

Those hookers were already in the trunk.
 
  1 vote, 7.1%

I'm not pregnant; I'm just fat.
 
  1 vote, 7.1%

That shit was all supposed to be sealed in my juvenile record. I'm not having this conversation.
 
  1 vote, 7.1%

I............can't read.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

I heard "job", not "shake".
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

I could have sworn he was a she.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

There is a fair amount of anecdotal evidence which would seem to indicate that my parents are in fact cousins. And by cousins, I mean siblings.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

I woke up coated in the stuff, and one thing lead to another.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

I'm not fat; I'm just pregnant.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 14, 2011 08:54PM PST poll #26
56661
?

Cats
 
  5 votes, 41.7%

Bulldogs
 
  3 votes, 25.0%

Mastiffs
 
  2 votes, 16.7%

German Shepherds
 
  1 vote, 8.3%

Beagles
 
  1 vote, 8.3%

Labs
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 12, 2011 06:48AM PST poll #27
56536
KNOW YOUR GEOGRAPHY SERIES

Which nation is populated with the most attractive people?

Way to keep it classy, asstard! We couldn't do a poll on "most innovative people" or "most progressive people", with an eye to celebrating important traits and accomplishments?
 
  5 votes, 29.4%

Brazil
 
  2 votes, 11.8%

Czechoslovakia (according to my extensive Maxim research)
 
  2 votes, 11.8%

Sweden
 
  2 votes, 11.8%

the dominican republic!
 
  2 votes, 11.8%

Russia
 
  1 vote, 5.9%

Italy
 
  1 vote, 5.9%

Canada
 
  1 vote, 5.9%

Norway. The beautiful sweedes are in fact norwegian.
 
  1 vote, 5.9%

Andorra
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Sri Lanka
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Columbia
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Japan
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

U.S.A.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 11, 2011 09:28PM PST poll #28
56526
We've conclusively confirmed that Batman can beat Superman. Who else can beat Superman?

Wonder Woman
 
  5 votes, 33.3%

Nobody else gets to beat Batman's bitch
 
  3 votes, 20.0%

Your mom beats him all the time
 
  3 votes, 20.0%

Darth Vader
 
  2 votes, 13.3%

The Hulk
 
  1 vote, 6.7%

Jesse Custer
 
  1 vote, 6.7%

Aquaman
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

My Grandma
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Mr. Mxyzptlk
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 11, 2011 08:25AM PST poll #29
56492
Continuing with the superhero theme, there have been some pretty awesome superhero movies in the last few years. However, there have been some really craptastic ones too. Which crap superhero/comic book movie do you hate the most?

Ghost Rider. Nicholas Cage. Do I need another reason?
 
  7 votes, 33.3%

These are all pretty fucking lame.
 
  4 votes, 19.0%

The Fantastic Four.No need to distinguish between 1st and 2nd.
 
  2 votes, 9.5%

Alucard
 
  2 votes, 9.5%

Daredevil. Words fail to describe the horror.
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

Catwoman. Admit it, guys still watch this mess to see Halle Berry in that catsuit.
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

This is too hard
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

Elektra. Both words and American Sign language are inadequate to describe the horror.
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

The 1994 Roger Corman Fantastic Four flick.
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

X-Men 3: The Last Stand. This is the best vehicle you could give Phoenix? And you didn't even get it right.
 
  1 vote, 4.8%

X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Even Hugh Jackman, a truly awesome Wolverine, couldn't save this steaming pile.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Green Lantern (however, this does not mean I didn't enjoy Ryan Reynolds in that suit)
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Captain America. The one with JD Salinger's kid as Cap.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Batman & Robin. Batnipples and hormones.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Batman Forever. Val Kilmer before he got fat.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Spiderman 3. Too much angst. Too much dancing. Too much everything.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Superman Returns. Snore.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

Supergirl I think I vomited in my mouth a little just now.
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


created Nov 10, 2011 09:17PM PST poll #30
Best "Groo-ism."


Cheese Dip.
 
  3 votes, 33.3%

Groo does what Groo does best!
 
  2 votes, 22.2%

This is the hidden message.
 
  2 votes, 22.2%

I can plainly see that!
 
  1 vote, 11.1%

A fray!
 
  1 vote, 11.1%

Did I err?
 
  0 votes, 0.0%


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