This is not The Haters Club You're Looking For discussion
The Prodigal Son has finally returned and now it's time for him to take his medicine. (Smetchie Interviews Alfonso)
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smetchie
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Dec 01, 2010 01:30PM
Hi Alfonso!
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Are you ready to be interviewed? Let's get started. What does "The Fish Master" mean?
hehehehe... you know what a misheard lyrics video is? you grab one of those metal songs where you can't understand shit of what's being said! and then you write what you think you heard! and make a video showing images of whatever train of though you got while listening to the song... it's fucking hilarious what some of these people do with those videos!! but anyway! there is a misheard lyrics video for a Nighwish song that i specially like... it is called the The Wish Master... but the chick who did the video hears Fish Master! an di love the image! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gg5_ml...
that's the video of it =) i love it!!!
Well that's not nearly as meaningful as I thought it might be.OK. Here's one for Eh and Brian:
Who was your stupid angel helping you with questions when you were doing all those interviews?
that's easy! it was Brian! he was amazing! you should seen the ones he had in store for Kasia! and Charissa!!! the man got skills! i can't thank him enough! if it was left to me all the questions will be about farting! and sex! and farting during sex!
OK. So now we know who was behind that I'd like to take a moment to say that we're very glad to have your primary focus back here at Haters! It's been strange. Welcome Back!
oh i see... i think the questions made the Guest happy... people here love to talk about themselves =) and those questions gave em the chance to tell the world about how they think =)
Oh I agree with you! 100% Just boring as hell for the rest of us to read.Name the one goodreader you'd most like to impress. What would you like him/her to think of you?
hahahah! i asked all my interviewees to give me a list of "nonos" before the interview... if you would have ask me that... you wouldnt be asking me this question =)i tell you what! let's compromise on this one! i'll answer 50% of it!!!
i'll give you the answer to the second part... i want her to think of me as a person she can have a regular conversation with =) not only to discuss stuff that's "funny" =)
i'm sorry... but i wont give you her name... but she knows who she is!
Yes I do. And you don't need to worry at all, Fooz, because I totally think of you as a person I can have a regular conversation with!You asked a lot of questions about the Portland meet-up, hinting around that you thought something sexy went down. But what do you REALLY think happened at that meet-up?
guahahahah! i am impressed with your detuctive skills!!! well.... that's a hard one! (TWSS)!!! lets see! they got together and posed for some pictures... then they talked a lot... and then they went home... i wasen't really that interested... i knew about it way before it happened and to be honest... i was just playing my character... if you ask them you'll notice that i didnt ask any of them what went down... i honestly dont care =) it was just my character having fun...
red and black square boxers and a black shirt that reads "i'm just like you only cuter and smarter" you?
I'm wearing an adorable cowl-neck sweater dress and black leggings.What is your first name?
My first name is MIguel, my second name is Alfonso, and my third name is De Jesus... plus 2 last names =)
How did you become so scared of frogs?
hahahah, good one!!!wayyyyyyy back in the days i joined a group of kids into stoning one to death... and my uncle found us... he then spent the rest of the year telling me how the spirit of the frog was coming back to hunt me... every time there was one around he'll tell me it was the dead frog coming to get me... it sounds silly now... but when i was a kid it used to fucking scare the shit out of me!also.. they are slimy!!!! i hate that feeling when they touch you@!!! I HATE ITT!!!!!
Tell me one of your happiest childhood memories.
You know that thing about the frog actually makes sense. I couldn't think of a single good reason for being afraid of frogs but that one does it! I'd be afraid too!
the fuck! if i had any selfsteem left in me i'd get depressed right now!!! i can't think of any!!! i try to avoid thinking about my childhood as much as possible!!! i hated it!!!!next question please!!!
Oh man! I'm sorry Fooz! *Big hug and a pat on the ass*
Ok let's move on to something happy.
Have you ever had an experience with a vibrator?
Describe.
its all good! ummm.... i went with a friend to buy a vibrator for her... she was just a friend... nothing kinky! the thing is that she got in there and started talking with the chick who worked there about the diferent vibrators and their pros and contras... and WOW! that woman really new her busyness! i didnt know there were so many! with different qualities!!! it was weird!!! but besides taht... i never used a vibrator... nor played with one in bed...
Interesting. Well, just between you and me: you might wanna do yourself a favor...Ahem. Anyway.
Have you ever had an imaginary friend?
had? i still have em!!! when i'm bored and there is nobody to entertain me i create different personalities and talk with them! it amuses me!!! and for the last time! i ain't putting nothing up my butt!!! what is it with women and trying to get me to put stuff up there!!!!! i dont care about any glands that will give me pleasure... i aint care if it sounds homophobic if i dont try it... i'm just not trying that!!! it's weird!!!
Did I say anything about putting something up your butt? I don't believe I did.
Ok. I have an endless supply of questions for you but lots of them are about your childhood and I can see that's not an area you really wanna get into. Would you like to move on to the next phase of the interview where I ask questions that were submitted by others?
dude! don't hold back! i'll answer anything you got!!! if you into screw ball comedy my child hood can be funny....
Ok then a few more of mine first.Did you bathe with your siblings as a child? What games do you remember playing in the tub?
hahah! well i did!!! me and my big sister used to fill up the tub (we were really poor it was not actually a tub... and in order to fill it up some rags had to be stuffed in the drain of the "shower" to make it happen" and i do remember the last time i went inthere with my sister! i asked her if she wanted to see a fountain... and for some reason she said "yea" (she should have known better!) then i proceeded to pee! she got mad and kick me out! and never again! was i allowed with her in the bath!!!
HAHAHAHA! Yeah how old were you two that last time?I sometimes wonder what age you should stop your children bathing together but it sounds like things sort of figure themselves out.
my sister died when i was 9... so i guess i must have been 6 or 5 cuz it was even before she got sick.
That's sad. That's very, very sad. I can't imagine losing a child. Or one of my children losing her sister. Let's not get bogged down here, though.I'm drinking for the first time in a week of illness and not eating so things could get ugly quick.
I'm gonna shake off that last one. I'm going to give my girls a hug and kiss and then I'm moving on.
If you could take back one thing you've done or said on goodreads, what would it be?
My interview with MFSO... i really hate myself for that one =)of everything else i'm proud!
Are you ready for some questions submitted by others?
please!!! you want me to guess who wrote em?
That's up to you. You may try to guess if you like.What type of Papaya is best for fucking?
Oddrun!i've never fucked a papaya... i guess the best ones are the ones that are not rip yet... but are almost there... i'm planning on one day putting one in the mircrowave and fucking it!!! but there are many issues that need to be addressed first!!! like how hot i want the papaya to be... imagine me going to the ER with a burned out dick... what would i tell the doctor?? yeah.. iw as experimenting with fruit... and it went horribly wrong!!! hell no!! also the fact taht i think is really really really weird for a man to fuck a fruit!! and as much as i wish i could do it... i will restrain myself... cuz what if i like it!!! that'd be weird!!!
Right Oddrun.Moving on.
Are your immigration papers up to date?
Rusty. and yes they are. my father came here a long long time ago... by plane! not jumping a fence! i am legal! and i pay my goddamn taxes!
What was the biggest surprise when you first got to the U.S.?
The mail system... IT WORKS!!! you can send a letter to the person next door! and it goes though all the whole god damn system!!!! it's awesome!!!!! although i'm afraid of the post office... i do love the mail system!!! i wish i could get more letters tho! i like getting mail!!! i just dont like it when i have to go pick it up to the mail office! cuz i never walk around with ids (i dont use wallets and i always wear the wrong pants) and its weird!!! i also love the holidays cards!!!!
Alright Alfonso this is the second time you've mentioned that and I'll send you a fucking Christmas card alright?! PM me your address.What was it about Seth that caused you to be so submissive/subservient toward him?
Seth is a great guy! he just have issues... i always assumed that we were joking all the time he was being "mean" and i took everything as a joke... my people role play like that... for example... my sister will tell me to go get her a glass of water and to put 3 cubes of ice on the glass! or else she slap me!! then i will complain about me not being a slave! and that i ain't doint that shit! i do this while setting up the glass! then i will say something mean like "here you lazy bum" and it's all joke! when i realized that he was not joking... well you know what went down =)
Thanks for that thrilling recap of the rise and fall of your relationship. I know you like to skim and you're probably doing several other things at the same time as this interview but I'm still going to have to deduct a point for NOT ANSWERING THE QUESTION. I shall repeat it:What was it about Seth that caused you to be so submissive/subservient toward him?
um wait. Maybe you did answer it. Are you saying you are subservient/submissive to everyone because that's just the way of your people?
i checked both words in the dictionary... i think i gave you the answer... because i use to think he was cool... and joking...
