This is not The Haters Club You're Looking For discussion
I hate doorknob locks
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smetchie
(last edited Jun 11, 2010 07:57AM)
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Jun 11, 2010 07:56AM
What's the point of having a lock that you don't have to engage with a key? Isn't that just a recipe for disaster? I'll answer for you. YES! IT IS! There's no point! If you don't have the key in your hand you shouldn't be able to lock the door! We NEVER use the doorknob locks in our house. (mostly because we don't even have keys that open them.) But while I was on vacation the pet-sitter apparently decided it was a good idea to lock them. I found out about this yesterday when my daughters and I went out to the backyard and locked ourselves out. I hate locking myself out, especially when it's over 90 degrees. I climbed up to the top deck in my useless-for-climbing flip-flops, to the delight of my children (you could see their little brains thinking: "I didn't know our maid could perform amazing feats! I thought she just made PBJs and drank beers."), but that stupid door was locked too. I got sweaty. I hate being sweaty. There was an actual sheen of sweat on my face. This should never happen. Down with doorknob locks!
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For that matter - why have a doorknob? I don't as of a few days ago. I find the gaping hole a lovely way of inviting the outdoors in. I also find it cheaper than replacing it.
They've got these people...they're like doctors for locks (they even make housecalls!)... who can actually re-key your doorknob locks to match your deadbolt locks.
Doorknobs are also remarkably easy to install.
who does that installing? also a locksmith? and can I buy any doorknob?
Can you remember "lefty loosie / righty tighty?" Do you own a screwdriver (hint: it's not an alcoholic beverage)? If so, you can probably install a doorknob yourself. The bolts are pretty standard, so for the most part any doorknob will do, though you might want to ask someone at your local big box home improvement store to be sure. Of course, this all assumes that there wasn't any damage done to the door or the frame when the original doorknob came out.
Marie wrote: "you guys are making me feel bad."Then my job here is done.
Tom wrote: "They've got these people...they're like doctors for locks (they even make housecalls!)... who can actually re-key your doorknob locks to match your deadbolt locks."I'm vaguely aware of this but certain they'll want money better spent on a new handbag.
That's true...and handbags are excellent places to keep housekeys. Then, you can leave the handbag in the house while you go out in the back yard and lock yourself out, with your keys safely secured in the handbag.
Gretchen wrote: "you could see their little brains thinking: "I didn't know our maid could perform amazing feats! I thought she just made PBJs and drank beers."I love this line. You're my model of motherhood.
Tom wrote: "That's true...and handbags are excellent places to keep housekeys. Then, you can leave the handbag in the house while you go out in the back yard and lock yourself out, with your keys safely secur..."Yeah. I need to have the lock re-keyed. Or maybe I'll just hide the front door key somewhere. I had the back door key hidden but it didn't help because the petsitter had locked the stupid pointless doorknob lock!! Which brings me back to my original point.
Doorknob locks on bathroom doors - a good idea
Doorknob locks on outside doors - retarded
And note the fact that especially the ones on outside doors are hard to turn. So consider that - your pet-sitter actually had to do some work to get that stupid, useless door knob lock to lock. This, of course, assumes that your door knob locks are like mine. Bun, you need to switch out that lock. Or buy one of those hook dealios that they have in bathroom stalls. That would be very classy, no?
For right now I'm finding that a towel shoved in the hole and the dead bolt holding the door closed is working out just fine. I might try to install a knob next week but I'll most likely do is call my step-dad and ask if he has a screw driver I can barrow which will hopefully lead to him asking "what for...." and so on and so on and doobey doobey do.
Leaving aside for the moment that you spelled "borrow" wrong--- You don't own a screwdriver? Seriously?Or did you mean you wanted a screwdriver to place in a barrow, perhaps as grave goods for a mighty chieftan?
So, you ladies can't figure out door knobs and screw drivers? This is a sad day for feminism.
I was referring to Gretchen, you can't figure out how to operate her own door, and Marie, who apparently removed a door knob (or let it fall off), and let the door flap in the wind instead of putting on a new one.
I know perfectly well how to operate a doorknob AND a screwdriver thankyouverylittle. I didn't check to see if it was locked before I went outside because we NEVER lock it. My kid followed me out there and shut the door. We have since had a discussion about making sure you check the knob before you close a door so now SHE knows how to operate a doorknob as well. What I don't know how to do is motivate myself to get a locksmith over to the house and rekey the lock.
Calling a locksmith seems boring. I much prefer the idea of you climbing to the top deck and sweating.
I think I would prefer my door to flap in the wind rather than just stand there closed. What fun is a closed door?
Tom wrote: "Leaving aside for the moment that you spelled "borrow" wrong--- You don't own a screwdriver? Seriously?Or did you mean you wanted a screwdriver to place in a barrow, perhaps as grave goods for ..."
I might own a screw driver, but I also own a 10 year old son which means anything that can be used to destruct, construct, burn or throw is pretty much gone within 30 seconds of it appearing.
Also all the contents of my house are literally piled into one small area or under the eaves of my house while I have my wood floors re-done. So who the hell knows if I have a screw driver or not?!
I know I have a headache from the fumes, that's for sure.
BunWat wrote: "I agree with Tom. Purchase a screwdriver. Also say high to the widow of the mighty screwdriver chieftan for me.I am a little bit curious about where the doorknob went now. Did someone steal y..."
The doorknob is in a looooooong list of things that broke when my brother his wife and their four kids were living with me for 9 months, WHICH JUST ENDED 3 DAYS AGO - YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
At first I repaired things when they broke but after the 3rd coffee pot, the 3rd breaking down of the dishwasher I just stopped. The door knob was okay for a while (with duct tape) but then it got stuck and the door couldn't open or close at all so we had to walk around the house to the back door (where there are 2 broken panes of glass on the french door). One day my ex-husband came over, was irritated with the door and just took the knob out all together (hence the hole). The end.
Rusty wrote: "So, you ladies can't figure out door knobs and screw drivers? This is a sad day for feminism."Hey butt head!!! I can "figure out" a screw driver. My dad was a framer for years so I'm very familiar with the tools of the trade. I've just never found a need to install a door knob before. Add that to the fact that I'm as lazy as all get out and my aesthetic sensibilities have been severely diminished over the past 9 months (see previous thread regarding 9 month long house guests)and what you get is - one hole in place of a door knob.
Rusty wrote: "I was referring to Gretchen, you can't figure out how to operate her own door, and Marie, who apparently removed a door knob (or let it fall off), and let the door flap in the wind instead of putti..."no flapping Rusty, there is a dead bolt above where the knob used to be. duh.
Gretchen wrote: "I know perfectly well how to operate a doorknob AND a screwdriver thankyouverylittle. I didn't check to see if it was locked before I went outside because we NEVER lock it. My kid followed me out t..."I like this parenting idea of "discussing" things with your kids, I'm curious about the follow through part. Can't wait to hear how that works out. How old is she?
It wasn't really that they were from hell (they're from my family. My house is just small and not equiped to serve 9 people on a daily basis. My floors were actually crap before,so it seeEd line a good time while all the furniture was out.
good Lord. I typed that while at the beach with my kids on my phone. It looks like I was drunk.for the record. I was not drunk!
