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Definitely. Not only two, but multiple. Sometimes they converge, sometimes they don't.

I didn't know GR had such an option. Yeesh. Whoever put these options in was definitely too lazy to actually think of something sensible.

With Christmas coming up and everything, I kind of feel a little sad. I kind of miss my grandparents. Around this time last year, I was such a wreck that I just tried to stop thinking as if that would make me stop feeling anything. Not having them around has not felt quite as real until the last couple months or so.
Sometimes, everything reminds me of them. Working for my mom, seeing big carrots in grocery stores, waiting in the car for an hour downstairs just to have lunch with my grandmother, the way the old coaches had sewing pins sticking out of them, the way my grandmother kept making my grandfather chicken and my grandfather finally telling her that he hates it after thirty years together.... Heh. I think my earliest memories of my grandfather and dancing and running around the living room and dining room. I miss them. :'(
Sometimes, everything reminds me of them. Working for my mom, seeing big carrots in grocery stores, waiting in the car for an hour downstairs just to have lunch with my grandmother, the way the old coaches had sewing pins sticking out of them, the way my grandmother kept making my grandfather chicken and my grandfather finally telling her that he hates it after thirty years together.... Heh. I think my earliest memories of my grandfather and dancing and running around the living room and dining room. I miss them. :'(
Jacqueline (Granddaughter of Apollo and Hades)(Goddess of Misunderstood Sarcasm) wrote: "With Christmas coming up and everything, I kind of feel a little sad. I kind of miss my grandparents. Around this time last year, I was such a wreck that I just tried to stop thinking as if that wo..."
Awwwww I hope you're okay <3 If you need to talk, I'm here...
Awwwww I hope you're okay <3 If you need to talk, I'm here...
Jacqueline (Granddaughter of Apollo and Hades)(Goddess of Misunderstood Sarcasm) wrote: "Fathers can be such f*cking *ssholes sometimes."
Oh god tell me about it *eyeroll*
Oh god tell me about it *eyeroll*

What did I do wrong?

Muffin, I'm sorry to hear that, hey if you ever need to talk I'm here alright? Just remember that though I tell you this in person, that I'm here and you've come to mean a lot to me over the past year or so, just remember that you can always talk with me.
This sucks. :( Lol I started falling back into not eating again for the last week. I ate a relatively big/normal lunch today and now I feel sick and moody. And I still have to eat another meal in a couple hours.
Lol Why do I keep posting in this thread anyway? Lol Sigh. I hate crushes. I hate the way guys get under my skin so easily these days. Lol Sigh. One of my best friends dared me to ask the next stranger I was attracted to, but besides my other reservations about doing that, I don't think I need another guy to make his way under my skin. I have two right now. So I guess for now, I will try to do what I usually do: Look for flaws in them and keep telling myself they are jerks- hopefully until it goes away.
Heh, so I am back here. God, this December is depressing. Lol Back on this thread again, because my dad can be really be a jerk sometimes. I say something upbeat and then he finds something wrong with it. He really stresses me out sometimes. Isn't there a saying? "The only guy a girl can depend on is her father?" Sometimes, I think he is the one person I can't depend on. I always feel like I can never be good enough.
For the most part, my depression was gone. Well, until about half a month ago. Except for the moments that I felt like strangling my dad- mainly when he was talking about politics. He kind of argues both sides, but in the end, he makes everyone out to just not know any better- which makes me feel even more depressed. Sigh. I don't know anymore.
For the most part, my depression was gone. Well, until about half a month ago. Except for the moments that I felt like strangling my dad- mainly when he was talking about politics. He kind of argues both sides, but in the end, he makes everyone out to just not know any better- which makes me feel even more depressed. Sigh. I don't know anymore.
Sigh. Think I might be going crazy? Lol The fact that I have names for my multiple streams of thought is crazy. I am probably should just leave goodreads, because my roleplay characters become too big of a part of me.
I don't know. Today kind of sucks. Barely slept any last night and I was in a bad mood for about half of the day. My day started earlier than usual with my mom yelling at me and my mood swings being effected by coming on here. Then, I had an orthodontist appointment that took forever and, earlier that day, there was a train accident below the mall nearby. At least, there were no one died in the accident. And I also stayed out, because I knew staying home would be worse. Being idle at home is worse than keeping moving.
I felt cynical, morbid, and sarcastic all day. Also, I felt something else, but I am not sure how to describe it. I felt it before maybe a few days ago when I was online. Maybe I have become too emotionally connected to my characters.
And then, on top of that, I think I am starting to like someone new (as if I needed more problems). He is not someone that I would normally like, but he is sweet and naturally, as he is one of the few guys that every girl ought to be interested in, he already has someone. Sigh. I should just sever all ties before I really do something stupid, because I have already made a fool of myself several times.
I don't know. Today kind of sucks. Barely slept any last night and I was in a bad mood for about half of the day. My day started earlier than usual with my mom yelling at me and my mood swings being effected by coming on here. Then, I had an orthodontist appointment that took forever and, earlier that day, there was a train accident below the mall nearby. At least, there were no one died in the accident. And I also stayed out, because I knew staying home would be worse. Being idle at home is worse than keeping moving.
I felt cynical, morbid, and sarcastic all day. Also, I felt something else, but I am not sure how to describe it. I felt it before maybe a few days ago when I was online. Maybe I have become too emotionally connected to my characters.
And then, on top of that, I think I am starting to like someone new (as if I needed more problems). He is not someone that I would normally like, but he is sweet and naturally, as he is one of the few guys that every girl ought to be interested in, he already has someone. Sigh. I should just sever all ties before I really do something stupid, because I have already made a fool of myself several times.
Lol Now, I have Crazy by Gnarls Barkley stuck in my head. Now, I just want to watch the movie Kick A** and eat Thai food. This is the problem with associating movies with music and food. Lol
Lol So I guess I am crazy enough to be back here in the rant chat, talking about my problems to no one in particular. *half-hearted smile* Sigh. This all stinks. :( Eighteen years old; taking a gap year while all of my friends- if I can even call them that- are away, busy; and I am stuck here. :'( Sigh. Sorry for making whoever reads these listen to these again. Just lonely, sad, and did I forget to mention that yesterday was my first rejection? *ironic laugh* I must have. Sigh. That is okay too, by the way. I have a feeling that the crush was only because the guy was nice to me and quite honestly I am lonely due to the lack of people I can talk to. I have a knack for falling half in love with guys that are nice to me. That, kids, is called infatuation; and no, I am not going into details anymore, because I am tired of talking about it.
I guess I just feel like everyone has grown up and done something and well, I haven't really. Funny, how humiliation becomes embarrassment and then eventually goes hand in hand with guilt. Everyone is in college, has jobs, has something to explore, has new friends and relationships. And this is all sucks. Well, not for them, obviously, but just for me. Am I overreacting and feeling self-pity? Probably. Maybe has something to do my mood swings this week and being let down. Seems silly I should let a guy get to me, doesn't it? I should be able to just get move past it and focus on what I need to. Sigh. I don't remember focusing and ignoring guys being so hard. You would think that after recovering from depression and anxiety that something as silly as a crush would not be problematic or maybe cut you some slack and not present itself. Lol I am going off topic again, aren't I? I will probably be right as rain by the next week. Just a little emotional setback. I have some plans for the near future that I am working on. I suppose the morals of the story are: studies first and possible boyfriends and girlfriends can wait or be hanged; stay focused on your plans for the future; and stay optimistic and yada yada yada. The end.
I guess I just feel like everyone has grown up and done something and well, I haven't really. Funny, how humiliation becomes embarrassment and then eventually goes hand in hand with guilt. Everyone is in college, has jobs, has something to explore, has new friends and relationships. And this is all sucks. Well, not for them, obviously, but just for me. Am I overreacting and feeling self-pity? Probably. Maybe has something to do my mood swings this week and being let down. Seems silly I should let a guy get to me, doesn't it? I should be able to just get move past it and focus on what I need to. Sigh. I don't remember focusing and ignoring guys being so hard. You would think that after recovering from depression and anxiety that something as silly as a crush would not be problematic or maybe cut you some slack and not present itself. Lol I am going off topic again, aren't I? I will probably be right as rain by the next week. Just a little emotional setback. I have some plans for the near future that I am working on. I suppose the morals of the story are: studies first and possible boyfriends and girlfriends can wait or be hanged; stay focused on your plans for the future; and stay optimistic and yada yada yada. The end.
The word of the week seems to be "okay," because of all the disappointed "that's okay" and "it's okay" statements and the silent "okay" sighs of resignation.
Have you ever... Looked at your newsfeed for Facebook or other social media and seen a show or movie that many people like from childhood, but... That show or movie brings back disturbing memories? I remember talking to my therapist about these memories briefly- back when my school still required me to see a therapist. I think those memories were one of the main reasons she wanted me to continue seeing her. I still do not think I can really bring myself to describe them to people. I used to be ashamed of missing how... It felt. I don't blame the person who did what he did. In fact, I still have never told my parents about what happened either, because I only stopped feeling ashamed a little bit a couple years ago when my entire family was going through a rough time. Probably would have complicated everything to mention what happened about five years ago. I am sorry I cannot be more specific about what I am talking about, because the subject is still not a very comfortable one for me.
Ever tried to keep your distance from a person you cared about, knowing that it would never work out, and you manage for a day and a half until you see someone else with that same smile you have when you talk to that person? Sigh. This stinks. :/
Lol Does anyone even read these; or do they see I posted, see I am in a b*tchy mood, and then ignore them? Lol
Sigh Probably for the best anyways. Right now I am in one of those moods where I will bite your head off if you do any of the following: talk to me, look at me the wrong way and, well, aggravate me in other ways. Sigh. Lol I don't remember being quite this much of a b*tch earlier in my teens.
Sigh Probably for the best anyways. Right now I am in one of those moods where I will bite your head off if you do any of the following: talk to me, look at me the wrong way and, well, aggravate me in other ways. Sigh. Lol I don't remember being quite this much of a b*tch earlier in my teens.

Mac wrote: "Well, I just joined, and I just read them. It's good to get stuff off your mind, to outlet it. If you find yourself back here wanting to talk to someone, I'm always open for a conversation."
Thanks, Mac. :) And welcome to the CHB group.
Thanks, Mac. :) And welcome to the CHB group.

Sigh Probably for the best anyways. Right now I am in one of those moods where I will..."
I just recently joined, and I did, in fact, read all those posts. And I getcha. Life is really hard sometimes (all the time), and sometimes the whole world seems to be against you and there's no one you can trust. I understand that from experience too. It's tough. :(
I don't want to say any cliché advice, but keep trucking through and hope for better times ahead. As a Lord of the Rings fan, my favorite quote ever is this, "'But in the end it’s only a passing thing, this shadow; even darkness must pass.'" (– Samwise Gamgee)
I'm always all-ears if you ever just want someone to talk to. I like to listen and share advice when necessary (unless asked not to).
I agree with Mac too: It's good to have a safe haven to outlet. We got your back.
@Nathan
Lol Thanks, Nathan. You even completed your advice with a cool quote. Lol I definitely think that I would do something like that.
Lol Thanks, Nathan. You even completed your advice with a cool quote. Lol I definitely think that I would do something like that.
Sigh. Lol I don't know what to say. What am I supposed to say? What am I supposed to feel? Lol I don't know. Sigh. What a terrible week. :'( Why do I always mess everything up? I don't know how to fix this one either. I don't even know if I should fix it. Maybe this just means I am not ready to deal with those emotions and problems. Maybe this means I need to focus on music, schools and work more and not on... I don't know anymore. That would be the smart thing to do. But... I can't just walk away without an explanation or a resolution...
Jacqueline (Granddaughter of Apollo & Hades)(Clown Princess of Crime) wrote: "Sigh. Lol I don't know what to say. What am I supposed to say? What am I supposed to feel? Lol I don't know. Sigh. What a terrible week. :'( Why do I always mess everything up? I don't know how to ..."
Wow, I sound so st*p *d and pathetic sometimes. 🤔
Wow, I sound so st*p *d and pathetic sometimes. 🤔
Hm, well, not the only thing I have wrong with me. 😇 You don't have to answer these silly posts. I know you don't like them.
I guess I just need to be away from the Internet. I kind of just messed up everything with someone I care about.
I don't know. How old are you?
I don't know. How old are you?
Not a really big DC fan, are you? Her name is Harley Quinn- like the word "harlequin-" and she was a psychologist turned accomplice/girlfriend of the Joker.
To like Harley Quinn, I don't have to like the Joker too. In her own comic book series, she actually goes off on her own and becomes a hero- in her own way.



Thursday: That is sensible.
Brooke: And very stiff. I don't really like the whole romantic option about fate, but the second is not so bad.
Thursday: @Brooke You mean, old-fashioned and private.
Brooke: Yeah, whatever. Call it what you want.