What I really hate in m/m romance stories

[[deleted user]]

I hate menage.

[Susan65]

I hate that I love cheating...I hate that I love the emotional roller coaster that cheater causes me.

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

I hate the use of terms of endearment, such as baby and honey

[Kim]

I hate the word prick. Unless you're calling someone said word because he is, in fact, a prick, I don't like it.

[Danni]

I hate 'the smaller man,' 'the dark haired man.'

[Danni]

I hate 'his lover.'

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

I hate his "pucker"

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

And I really hate when macho dudes turn all fluffy and sweet the instant they fall in love

[Kim]

*snort* pucker. Don't forget rosebud.

[Kim]

I also hate that Susan loves cheating. Bad, bad Susan!

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

OMG, Kim! Rosebud! Worst one ever! Even had to remark about it in a review. :(

[Macky]

I hate it when in the midle of sex they start to speak in staccato... Need. You....Want. now... It drives me potty!!

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

Or the most used "Mine"

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

Oh, and I hate when they always call each others names out. Do people really do that?

[Macky]

I also hate when they say "the blonde" " the brunet" etc instead of using their names.

[Danni]

JustJen wrote: "Oh, and I hate when they always call each others names out. Do people really do that?"

Oh, please, please, please head over to this thread and back up my assertion that this is cheesy and weird.
http://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/8...

[Macky]

Danni wrote: "JustJen wrote: "Oh, and I hate when they always call each others names out. Do people really do that?"

Oh, please, please, please head over to this thread and back up my assertion that this is ch..."

Just read Goestas last post on there... Funny! :D

[Jen4607]

Add "winking hole" to the list.

Kim wrote: "*snort* pucker. Don't forget rosebud."

[Macky]

I can add one, a book I read called it a bunghole.. How sexy is that? Not!

[Danni]

I hate the word 'seed' for spunk, unless it's in a historical. Seriously disturbing but oddly arousing!

[Danni]

Macky wrote: "I can add one, a book I read called it a bunghole.. How sexy is that? Not!"

I hate the fact that I'm such a pervert I know exactly which book you are talking about! I probably should get out more.

[Macky]

Danni wrote: "Macky wrote: "I can add one, a book I read called it a bunghole.. How sexy is that? Not!"

I hate the fact that I'm such a pervert I know exactly which book you are talking about! I probably shoul..."

Lol. Didn't we discuss it a few weeks ago? :D

[Macky]

Danni wrote: "I hate the word 'seed' for spunk, unless it's in a historical. Seriously disturbing but oddly arousing!"

What about spooge? Hahahaha!!! :D

[Danni]

We certainly did. I didn't get past the sample but I still encountered the bunghole.

[Danni]

Macky wrote: "Danni wrote: "I hate the word 'seed' for spunk, unless it's in a historical. Seriously disturbing but oddly arousing!"

What about spooge? Hahahaha!!! :D"

I LOVE SPOOGE.

[Macky]

Danni wrote: "We certainly did. I didn't get past the sample but I still encountered the bunghole."

Hee hee! I secretly want to read it again just to see how bad it was. It should be the poster book for this thread but Ive forgotten who wrote it! I'll have to troll my reviews.

[Macky]

Danni wrote: "Macky wrote: "Danni wrote: "I hate the word 'seed' for spunk, unless it's in a historical. Seriously disturbing but oddly arousing!"

What about spooge? Hahahaha!!! :D"

I LOVE SPOOGE."

It is an awesome word! Lol.

[Danni]

Macky wrote: "Danni wrote: "We certainly did. I didn't get past the sample but I still encountered the bunghole."

Hee hee! I secretly want to read it again just to see how bad it was. It should be the poster b..."

I'm really peeved that I can't remember author or title, so I can't look back and reminisce about the glorious bunghole.

[Macky]

I hate that I sent time looking for it but its :

First Love Forever by DianeSheridan

[Danni]

Thanks for that Macky! I forgot that there was also 'dickmeat' in the sample.

So now I'm just going to say it I HATE DICKMEAT.

[Danni]

Ooh, sorry I'm on a roll now, but I also hate 'fisted his meat.'

[Kim]

Danni wrote: "Thanks for that Macky! I forgot that there was also 'dickmeat' in the sample.

So now I'm just going to say it I HATE DICKMEAT."

I LOVE dickmeat! Oh, wait... that's probably not what you meant.

[[deleted user]]

I hate stories which read like they were heterosexual bodice rippers where the author just changed the pronoun from she to he and one guy is a short, thin, long-hared and effeminate total bottom and the other is big, tall, muscular, macho total top.

[Kim]

Lucas wrote: "I hate stories which read like they were heterosexual bodice rippers where the author just changed the pronoun from she to he and one guy is a short, thin, long-hared and effeminate total bottom an..."

I have run across one particular author who writes the exact same story twice - one M/F, the second M/M. There are probably more of them, but that's the only one I caught.

[Kendra]

The pet names are a pet peeve, but the one I REALLY hate is "lover." It reminds me of that scene from Dirty Dancing where the old cougar is talking to Johnny and calls him "lover." It has always just given me an ick factor that makes me want to vomit.

And really, who uses that? I could not imagine what my husband would say if I walked up to him and said "hey lover (in as sultry of voice as I can manage), come here so I can give you a kiss." He wouldn't be able to stop laughing long enough to kiss me.

[Ije the Devourer of Books]

I hate stories with evil pastors or religious leaders. Not all religious leaders are homophobic. Why can't we have some gay religious leaders in m/m books? I know plenty.

[Katharina]

I hate unrealistic lovey-dovey mushiness. When every other sentence is so cottoncandy sweet, it makes me want to brush my teeth. I'm totally okay with romantic moments and loving conversations. But it takes every romance out of a story for me if every spoken sentence is a declaration of the deepest felt love ever experienced. Seriously, if my husband had talked to me like that, I'd have dumped him after a week.

[Macky]

I hate it when the writer has their guys "giggling" -- men don't giggle, kids giggle, teenage girls giggle, women giggle but macho hunky men ( gay or not) do not giggle!! Chuckle I could go with at a pinch if they don't want to say " laugh" but purrlease.... don't make your men giggle!

[Goesta]

We do too giggle!!! When we're giddy with candy. Giddily giggling like a kid who just got showered in lollies. Erm.

[Macky]

Noooo its still not right... Giggling + man = arrrrgh!!!
You can giggle in RL but not in my m/m romance. Lol.
Now, that showering in lollies thing... That sounds interesting!

[Goesta]

Point taken I shall discover another word for it! Lollies=pure sugar rush

[Macky]

Goesta wrote: "Point taken I shall discover another word for it! Lollies=pure sugar rush"

YAAAY! :)

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

Good one, Shannon!

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

Ohhhh, I hate when the top orders the bottom to "Come!," and the bottom, of course, instantly does so.

[Kim]

I hate anything involving licking, sucking, tonguing, mouthing, or any other oral action in belly buttons. Calling them navels does NOT make it any less horrifying. Might actually be worse. lol

This is probably related to the images of my pasty white dad sitting around in his threadbare, gaping briefs and his man boobs, digging lint out of his belly button with his pinky finger. Gag. Hmm... judging by the shudder and the lip curl I just weathered, I guess there's really no 'probably' about it.

(You're welcome, BTW -- just wanted to make sure I took you all down with me. You know, in case anyone WASN'T on the same page with the belly button thing, which I find hard to believe, but you never know.)

[Kim]

JustJen wrote: "Ohhhh, I hate when the top orders the bottom to "Come!," and the bottom, of course, instantly does so."

I think this belongs in BDSM only, and in M/M only... I really, really can't buy it when a woman is ordered to come, 'cause we just don't work that way. On the other hand, I know several men who can come on command.

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

I don't mind it so much in BDSM, but for sure in a vanilla relationship, especially when they've only done the deed like one or two times, it just doesn't work for me.

[Kim]

JustJen wrote: "I don't mind it so much in BDSM, but for sure in a vanilla relationship, especially when they've only done the deed like one or two times, it just doesn't work for me."

Agreed. :)

[JustJen "Miss Conduct"]

I hate when guys cry at the drop of a hat. I never thought guys cried so much as when I started reading MM.

[Shannon]

Kim wrote: "JustJen wrote: "Ohhhh, I hate when the top orders the bottom to "Come!," and the bottom, of course, instantly does so."

I think this belongs in BDSM only, and in M/M only... I really, really can'..."

I wanna meet Kim's friends! :)