Subfertility Quotes

“Something profound happens when you wake up in a calm green pasture on the other side of the treacherous storm that you thought would end you. You discover who you are beyond the unimaginable. You discover what you are made of. Suddenly, the thing that may have broken you becomes the very thing that empowers and emboldens you.”
― Jodi Sky Rogers, Mending Softly: Finding Hope & Healing After Ectopic Pregnancy Loss

“It’s strange territory, this desertland between maidenhood and motherhood. I suppose it was ingrained from an early age that one stage naturally and effortlessly follows the next. Yet, here I stand, longing to make that transition, both ready and eager to enter an elusive place, the door to which remains tightly shut. So, I rest on the periphery, a wandering nomadic drifter waiting my turn. I am lost in an eternal dance of emotion, shifting between hopefulness, grief, frustration and fear. Some days I feel strongly that my time is coming soon and I will be a mother. Other days I am impatient and not so sure it will ever happen for me.”
― Jodi Sky Rogers

“I wish I’d fallen softly. Light and graceful like a feather drifting slowly to the earth on a warm and dreamy summer’s day. I wish that I’d landed softly too. But there is nothing soft or graceful about that devastating moment when the worst has come to pass. The unavoidable truth is that it is hard, cold and brutal. All that you know to be true and good in life shatters in an instant. You feel like a delicate pottery bowl violently tossed from your place of rest, watching yourself crash and scatter across the hostile dark earth. The sound is deafening. Time stops. Inside, the quiet ache of shock and heartbreak slowly makes its grip known. They cut deep, these jagged edges of broken sherds. You gasp for air hungrily, yet somehow forget how to breathe.”
― Jodi Sky Rogers, Mending Softly: Finding Hope & Healing After Ectopic Pregnancy Loss

“Is there any point in breathing if this is what the world is asking me to face?’ You think to yourself. Somehow though, whether through madness or magic, you find a way to. You keep breathing even when you don’t think you can. You surprise yourself.”
― Jodi Sky Rogers, Mending Softly: Finding Hope & Healing After Ectopic Pregnancy Loss

“The fall is hard – the crashing, the breaking, the scattering of your broken clay body. What I found however, is that the mending is slow, soft and although somewhat ungraceful still, you sense yourself being held by an unseen force, something greater than you wrapping you in its balm. Remember this on those days when it feels like healing will never come.”
― Jodi Sky Rogers, Mending Softly: Finding Hope & Healing After Ectopic Pregnancy Loss

“How does one navigate this territory in the interim? This tricky place of peripheral connection to motherhood? Also, considering that the partial or what I’ve taken to calling ‘perimatrescence’ triggers not only the desire to have a baby, but also awakens the need to express and share your nurturing or mothering qualities - How do you give yourself permission to nurture or embody your ‘mothering heart’, so to speak? In other words, how do you express the energy of the wild mother archetype in daily life while you are still journeying towards motherhood?”
― Jodi Sky Rogers

“I am fearful and hopeful and shameful. I worry that I am empty, or that I am full of the wrong things. I worry that I am disappearing, eroding, failing. I do not know what to do with all these feelings. I only want to be a mother. Why is that so easy for some people and so hard for others? Why is it so hard for me?”
― Emilie Pine, Notes To Self