Tabalus > Tabalus's Quotes

“A boy may be as disagreeable as he pleases, but when a girl refuses to crap sunshine on command, the world mutters darkly about her moods.”
― Scott Lynch, The Republic of Thieves

“What's the n-never-fail universal apology?"

"'I was badly misinformed, I deeply regret the error, go fuck yourself with this bag of money.”
― Scott Lynch, The Republic of Thieves

“You can knock down kingdoms on a whim. What you need is someone to make sure you don't get hit by a carriage when you cross the street.”
― Scott Lynch, The Republic of Thieves

“Someday, Locke Lamora,” he said, “someday, you’re going to fuck up so magnificently, so ambitiously, so overwhelmingly that the sky will light up and the moons will spin and the gods themselves will shit comets with glee. And I just hope I’m still around to see it.”
“Oh please,” said Locke. “It’ll never happen.”
― Scott Lynch, The Lies of Locke Lamora

“... It's perfect! Locke would appreciate it."

"Bug," Calo said, "Locke is our brother and our love for him knows no bounds. But the four most fatal words in the Therin language are 'Locke would appreciate it.'"

"Rivalled only by 'Locke taught me a new trick,'" added Galo.

"The only person who gets away with Locke Lamora games ..."

"... is Locke ..."

"... because we think the gods are saving him up for a really big death. Something with knives and hot irons ..."

"... and fifty thousand cheering spectators.”
― Scott Lynch, The Lies of Locke Lamora

“I cut off his fingers to get him to talk, and when he'd confessed everything I wanted to hear, I had his fucking tongue cut out, and the stump cauterized."

Everyone in the room stared at him.

"I called him an asshole, too," said Locke. "He didn't like that.”
― Scott Lynch, The Lies of Locke Lamora

“I don't have to beat you. I don't have to beat you, motherfucker. I just have to keep you here... until Jean shows up.”
― Scott Lynch, The Lies of Locke Lamora

“To us — richer and cleverer than everyone else!”
― Scott Lynch, The Lies of Locke Lamora

“Nanny Ogg knew how to start spelling 'banana', but didn't know how you stopped.”
― Terry Pratchett, Witches Abroad

“Any man can fart in a closed room and say that he commands the wind”
― Scott Lynch, Red Seas Under Red Skies

“Sind Sie eine Kussmamsell? Ich habe Betty doch gesagt, ich brauche keine Mädchen, die dafür bezahlt werden, dass sie mich besuchen. Dann doch lieber gar keine Mädchen"
Ich bin mir nicht ganz so sicher, von was er spricht. "Ich bin keine Kussmamsell."
"Es gab mal eine Zeit, da brauchte ich nur lächeln..."
Jetzt lächelt er, wobei er ein falsches Gebiss entblößt, das nicht richtig sitzt.
"Sir, ich bin nicht hier, um sie zu küssen."
Beim Klang meiner Stimme verändert er die Position seines Rollstuhles, so dass er mir fast gegenübersteht, und hebt das Kinn. "Weshalb klopfen Sie dann an meine Tür, junges Fräulein?”
― Victoria Schwab, The Archived

“Not all those who wander are lost.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

“How do you invent a religion?” Evie asked.

Will looked over the top of his spectacles. “You say, ‘God told me the following,’ and then wait for people to sign up.”
― Libba Bray, The Diviners

“There is nothing more terrifying than the absoluteness of one who believes he's right.”
― Libba Bray, The Diviners

“Some mornings, she’d wake and vow, Today, I will get it right. I won’t be such an awful mess of a girl. I won’t lose my temper or make unkind remarks. I won’t go too far with a joke and feel the room go quiet with disapproval. I’ll be good and kind and sensible and patient. The sort everyone loves. But by evening, her good intentions would have unraveled. She’d say the wrong thing or talk a little too loudly. She’d take a dare she shouldn’t, just to be noticed. Perhaps Mabel was right, and she was selfish. But what was the point of living so quietly you made no noise at all? “Oh, Evie, you’re too much,” people said, and it wasn’t complimentary. Yes, she was too much. She felt like too much inside all the time. So why wasn’t she ever enough?”
― Libba Bray, The Diviners

“Your mother and I do not approve of drinking. Have you not heard of the Eighteenth Amendment?”

“Prohibition? I drink to its health whenever I can.”
― Libba Bray, The Diviners

“I thought research would be more glamorous, somehow. I'd give the librarian a secret code word and he'd give me the one book I needed and whisper the necessary page numbers. Like a speakeasy. With books.”
― Libba Bray, The Diviners

“You can’t blame a fella for kissing the prettiest girl in New York, can you, sister?” Sam’s grin was anything but apologetic.

Evie brought up her knee quickly and decisively, and he dropped to the floor like a grain sack. “You can’t blame a girl for her quick reflexes now, can you, pal?”
― Libba Bray, The Diviners

“Gods, man, don't you start now,' I said softly. 'We're going to get a terrible reputation if we just keep travelling across the countryside crying all the time.”
― Sebastien de Castell, Traitor's Blade

“Nanny Ogg could see the future in the froth on a beer mug. It invariably showed that she was going to enjoy a refreshing drink which she almost certainly was not going to pay for.”
― Terry Pratchett, Maskerade

“What sort of person," said Salzella patiently, "sits down and writes a maniacal laugh? And all those exclamation marks, you notice? Five? A sure sign of someone who wears his underpants on his head. Opera can do that to a man.”
― Terry Pratchett, Maskerade

“Granny hesitated. "Agnes who calls herself Perditax?"
"Perdita X," said Nanny. She at least respected anyone's right to recreate themselves.”
― Terry Pratchett, Maskerade

“There was a bond, you see, when we were both young, but she wanted to be the best of all witches and I hoped one day to be Archchancellor. Alas for us, our dreams came true.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Shepherd's Crown