Ross Willard
asked
Jason R. Richter:
You reference 'the eye of god' in your novel. Two questions: 1. the eye of which god, and 2. If one of his/her eyes was in your bedroom, did he/she keep the rest of them with him, or should the rest of us worry that he/she's peeping on us as well?
Jason R. Richter
You are a steely-eyed student of subtext, sir. Well played. Well played, indeed.
I don't often talk about it in public anymore, but I was briefly in the seminary. It apparently still bleeds through into my writing. People that knew of my seminary stint from my former life and knew about my leaving assumed it was my propensity to giggle whenever someone wrote or said the word 'seminary.'
But it is a much darker tale than that.
My downfall was a comparative religion class. Basic, 101 level stuff. Who has the most available sizes? Best seating? Most afterlife amenities? Who saves people more on car insurance?
The paper I turned in was entitled "The Bro-ification of World Religions." I won't bore you with all the details, but the gist was when men turned religion into a corporation, they shunted all the women to the side relegating them to the roles of prostitutes and chattel. Before the "bro-ification," before white bearded Anthony Hopkins lifeguard god decided to count how many times I masturbated, women were the center of all religions. They are the sacred divine made manifest in all our lives.
This did not go over well and it quickly became the same, tired cliche.
Midnight, torchlit tribunal meeting in the quad.
The reading of the charges, chief among them being proclaimed a pantheistic goddess worshiper.
The stripping of my vestments.
The removing of my name from the rolls.
And the sticky buns.
The voiding of my parking permit.
The running me out of town on the ceremonial rail.
You know, the usual.
In certain parts of Nebraska, I am still referred to in much the same way as Voldemort. Except, I'm "The One who shall not date our daughter."
As "Identifying Deities and Trapping Them Safely" is a third year course, I am not 100% sure which goddesses were looking down on me. I have narrowed it down to the three most likely.
Aeval [pronounced "EYE-vull"], Celtic goddess of sexual relations. She was a known punisher of men that did not properly sate their women.
Nin-imma [pronounced as it's spelled], Sumerian goddess. She was the deification of the female genitals.
Tlazolteotl [pronounced incorrectly], Aztec goddess of death, filth, licentiousness, sex, uncertainty, intoxication, and pleasure. She would punish the unfaithful, but she was also a purification goddess and would heal people of maladies caused by sex and intoxication. This is what earned her the "Filth Eater" nickname.
Those are the most likely, as I said. As for the second part of your question, young squire, I will tell you only this:
You should not be afraid that the goddess looks down upon you. You should be afraid because the goddess looks down upon you in disfavor.
I don't often talk about it in public anymore, but I was briefly in the seminary. It apparently still bleeds through into my writing. People that knew of my seminary stint from my former life and knew about my leaving assumed it was my propensity to giggle whenever someone wrote or said the word 'seminary.'
But it is a much darker tale than that.
My downfall was a comparative religion class. Basic, 101 level stuff. Who has the most available sizes? Best seating? Most afterlife amenities? Who saves people more on car insurance?
The paper I turned in was entitled "The Bro-ification of World Religions." I won't bore you with all the details, but the gist was when men turned religion into a corporation, they shunted all the women to the side relegating them to the roles of prostitutes and chattel. Before the "bro-ification," before white bearded Anthony Hopkins lifeguard god decided to count how many times I masturbated, women were the center of all religions. They are the sacred divine made manifest in all our lives.
This did not go over well and it quickly became the same, tired cliche.
Midnight, torchlit tribunal meeting in the quad.
The reading of the charges, chief among them being proclaimed a pantheistic goddess worshiper.
The stripping of my vestments.
The removing of my name from the rolls.
And the sticky buns.
The voiding of my parking permit.
The running me out of town on the ceremonial rail.
You know, the usual.
In certain parts of Nebraska, I am still referred to in much the same way as Voldemort. Except, I'm "The One who shall not date our daughter."
As "Identifying Deities and Trapping Them Safely" is a third year course, I am not 100% sure which goddesses were looking down on me. I have narrowed it down to the three most likely.
Aeval [pronounced "EYE-vull"], Celtic goddess of sexual relations. She was a known punisher of men that did not properly sate their women.
Nin-imma [pronounced as it's spelled], Sumerian goddess. She was the deification of the female genitals.
Tlazolteotl [pronounced incorrectly], Aztec goddess of death, filth, licentiousness, sex, uncertainty, intoxication, and pleasure. She would punish the unfaithful, but she was also a purification goddess and would heal people of maladies caused by sex and intoxication. This is what earned her the "Filth Eater" nickname.
Those are the most likely, as I said. As for the second part of your question, young squire, I will tell you only this:
You should not be afraid that the goddess looks down upon you. You should be afraid because the goddess looks down upon you in disfavor.
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