Always Mine (Honey Mountain, #1)

by Laura Pavlov

Ashlan was the baby of the family. Dylan and Charlotte were twins and two years older than her, two years younger than me. Our oldest sister, Everly, was two years older than me.

His shoulder-length hair was tied back at the nape of his neck, and a few pieces fell out around his face. He was almost a foot taller than me at six foot four, with broad shoulders and piercing gray eyes. Every girl in town fawned all over him, but he’d always just been my best friend. My rock. He despised most people, but for whatever reason, we connected when we were young, and it had never changed.

Niko had been calling me Honey Bee since we were kids and I’d ended up naming my business after the silly nickname.

“You’re always fine, Honey Bee.” I nodded. Because he was right. I’d been through worse than Jansen Clark cheating on me and inviting me to his wedding. I would be fine. I had to be.

Vivian knew who I was, just like I knew who she was. It was no secret that I liked to fuck, but we didn’t talk about it because it wasn’t her thing. I mean, I knew she’d lost her virginity to that little pussy, and I knew he’d been the only dude she’d ever been with, and that was as much as she’d tell me. But I wanted more for her. She deserved more. She deserved everything.

Vivian Thomas was the best person I knew. There weren’t many people that I loved deeply… but she was one of them. Hell, she was at the top of the list next to my sister and Mabel.

I’d given her the name Honey Bee when we were kids because we’d learned about them in school. I’d always been amazed at the way the girl would buzz around spreading ...

Deep inside her lived a queen… but she hadn’t tapped into that shit yet. But I saw it. I saw the fierceness behind her dark gaze when it came to protecting he...

She was always in control. I recognized it because it was something that we shared. My need for control was born out of anger, while Vivian’s came from a place of loss. After losing her mother, she’d kicked into gear and stepped up for her younger sisters, while her older sister, Everly, went off to chase her dreams. I guess we had that in common—but neither of us cried about it.

“Pace yourself, Honey Bee. You’ve got to work tomorrow.” I thought about the first time I ever called her by that nickname. The first time I realized Vivian Thomas was my best friend. The first time I crawled through her window craving all her goodness…

“A lot of people don’t understand our friendship. But I don’t give a shit what anyone thinks.”

“You know you can talk to me about anything. I’m obviously not an expert on relationships, but I can tell you that sex should feel fucking fantastic. If you haven’t felt that way about it, it just means you’ve been with the wrong dude, which is what I’ve thought from the start.”

My best friend did not like many people, and I’d always been honored to be his favorite.

I was most definitely three sheets to the wind, because I’d never allowed myself to fantasize about my best friend. But tonight, I’d let my mind wander.

Vivian had been the only good thing in my life for as long as I could remember. My only constant. I’d never fuck that up.

Even if the thought of pleasing her was all I could think about now. That dip fuck ex of hers had never shown her pleasure. Never explored or tasted her sweet body. I wanted to beat him senseless, but at the same time, a small part of me was happy that he didn’t get to share that with her.

Like I said, I’m a dark fucker. A greedy bastard when it came to Vivian Thomas. I wanted the best for her, and I knew without a shadow of a doubt that it wasn’t me. But it s...

However, if you were to look up the world’s most unattainable man in the dictionary, there would be an eight by ten glossy of Niko West.

But maybe we could just have a short-lived fling, he could teach me the ropes, show me what everyone was talking about, and then we could return to normal. Was that not possible?

We came from two different worlds in so many ways… my heart hard and her heart soft and tender; yet we shared a lot of similarities as far as loyalty and loss and all the bullshit we’d both been through.

“You don’t have to be strong for me, you know.”

“Yeah. I still remember how you were there with me that day, and how you came and slept in my bed every day for a week after she passed. I’ll be grateful forever, you know that, right? I don’t think I would have slept, let alone pulled myself together if you hadn’t been there.” “Nothing I wouldn’t do for you, you know that.”

“You’re lucky I love you,” she said as she lay back again in the canoe. Don’t I know it. I’m the luckiest bastard around.

I’d talked to her this morning, and honestly, I’d learned at a young age that there was no keeping secrets from a Thomas girl. We were all in one another’s business, and it had just always been that way.

and I couldn’t deny Vivian Thomas anything. She was the one person I would walk through fire for. The one person I would cross any lines for. But I’d need to be clear. It would be a one-and-done deal. No sex. I couldn’t allow that to happen. But I could make her feel good. I owed her that much, right?

“I’m not going to have sex with you, Vivian, because you and I see sex differently.” She cleared her throat. “How so?” “I fuck. You make love. And you deserve that, but that isn’t me. But I can sure as hell manage to rock your fucking world without sticking my dick in you. And I want to be the first one to taste you.”

To me, Vivian Thomas was the most beautiful, delicate person I’d ever known.

“One time, Honey Bee. Then we go back to normal,”

…sure

Our differences impossible to miss. My fingers were rough from fighting fires and working at the firehouse, and everything about Vivi was soft. Her skin. Her hair. Her heart.

And just like that, we were acting completely normal. But being near her was challenging now. I wanted more. And that couldn’t happen.

Called it

We drove in silence to my house and the tension nearly killed me. He wanted me. I wanted him. What was the problem?

I already loved Vivi, I had my whole life. Wanting her wasn’t supposed to happen.

I shouldn’t have crossed that line with her, but now that I had, I couldn’t stop thinking about her.

What the fuck was I doing? How the hell was I ever going to walk away?

She deserved everything.

Niko was the only guy on the planet that I’d ever felt a comfort like this with. I could say anything to him, and I knew he wouldn’t judge me or make fun of me.

I knew this wasn’t his thing, but I’d always had a knack for convincing Niko to do things he didn’t want to do.

“You’re sweeter than people think, you know that?” “I’m not. Only with you,”

“You’re too good to hate anyone. I’ll hate him enough for the both of us.”

Niko wasn’t that guy. He didn’t whine about missing out on things or complain that life wasn’t fair. He was a doer. If he wanted something, he went after it. He grew up with a drunk father who beat him, so he didn’t drink, nor did he want a family of his own.

Niko was the sexiest man on the planet when he shined his light on you, and the way he was looking at me right now had me squeezing my legs together.

Niko didn’t care about keeping secrets. As long as I knew this was temporary, he was good with it. But I knew we needed to keep it between us because the town gossip would run rampant, and when it ended and I had to pick up the pieces, I didn’t want anyone to hate him.

His hand came up and caressed my cheek. He studied me like he was memorizing every curve on my face. His mouth covered mine, soft and sweet this time, and I got lost in the moment again. Because it felt damn good.

My oldest sister always knew when we were up to something or keeping something from her. She’d be home soon for the holidays and with Niko’s dad being released from prison soon, I knew things were about to change. And for the first time in my life… I wanted to freeze time right here. I didn’t want anything to change.

I’d barely slept, and I’d quickly realized that sleeping with Vivian was the best sleep I’d ever gotten in my life. I’d never slept with another person. Not when I was a kid or an adult, aside from her.

And there was a peacefulness that surrounded me when I was with her. Hell, it’s the reason I’d hung on to this one relationship like my life depended on it. And here I was fucking it all up. And I didn’t know how to stop. Now that I’d had a taste, I just wanted more.

I was a greedy bastard when it came to Vivian Thomas. Always had been. But this was next level. We’d been texting nonstop, which wasn’t totally out of the ordinary, aside from the fact that we were missing one another in ways we’d never experienced before. And we weren’t hiding it. A few of the texts...

“Oh. My. I see I’ve interrupted something. I would call the fire department to put out this fire, but it appears you’re already here,” Dylan said over a fit of laughter.

Dylan Thomas was a smart-ass most days, but she was salt-of-the-earth good to her core. She was a straight shooter, and she loved her sisters fiercely.

As I pulled away, I glanced in the rearview mirror and my gaze locked with hers and she waved. And my goddamn chest squeezed, which pissed me off. I needed to stay in control. I never allowed emotions to rule me, and I damn well wouldn’t start now. Losing control was not an option.