Always Mine (Honey Mountain, #1)

by Laura Pavlov

Niko was big and strong and there was a fierceness there. Vulnerability was not something he ever showed, but he’d given me a glimpse. A glimpse of the pain and the heartache and the sadness that came with the abuse that he experienced.

“I love you, Vivian Thomas.” He pulled away and his gaze studied mine. “I really love you. Do you know that? More than I ever thought possible.” My breath caught in my throat. “I love you too.”

“What is it that you think I need that you haven’t given me? Do you think I want to get married today? Is that what you’re afraid of?” “No. I think you want to get married someday, and to be honest, I’m not opposed to it. Never thought it was something I’d want, but I know that you’re my forever, and I don’t mind saying that to the world.”

“Niko, you aren’t fucked up. You survived something terrible, and you’re still standing. You are the best uncle to Mabel and the best boyfriend to me. My sisters love you. Everyone at the firehouse loves you. You’re the most amazing man I know.” I sniffed as the tears started to fall. It had been an emotional last twenty-four hours for us, and I was feeling it. Feeling all the things for this man.

“What does that mean? You’ll take me as I am?” “Always. I’m not in a hurry, because I’m happy for the first time in a very long time. You make me happy.” “You make me happy too, Honey Bee.”

With those words, I leaned forward and kissed him. I kissed him like it was forever. B...

Hawk and my sister had dated all through high school, and to say that us Thomas girls had loved him would be a massive understatement. He was part of the family until their relationship ended, and obviously when forced to take sides, we’d always have Everly’s back.

Everly did everything she could to avoid Hawk when he was home. He’d come by the bakery and ask about her, but she preferred to stay away from him. I knew it was because she still cared, but she’d never admit that.

My oldest sister put on a good front, but I knew she was dying to see that magazine. She’d called me after the Sports Illustrated issue was released and asked if I thought he looked happy. But then she’d quickly changed the subject and said she didn’t want to talk about him anymore.

“How are things going with Niko? I can’t believe how easily he adapted to being in a relationship. Never thought I’d see the day.” “It’s because he was always in love with Vivi,” Charlotte said, resting her head on my shoulder.

I peeled back the gauze on the left side of my chest and showed her the honeybee that now resided there. It stood out in great contrast to the angry ink covering the rest of my body, just the way this girl stood out in great contrast in my life. She was the light that shined through all of the darkness.

“Niko,” she said, and her word broke on a sob. “What is this?” “It’s my honeybee and my heart. They’re one and the same. I wanted to show you that you’re my forever in every way.”

I loved the way Vivian felt everything. So genuine and real and vulnerable. A way that I’d fought hard not to be, yet I longed for that kind of honesty in my life.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” she whispered. “You won’t hurt me.” I raised her hand and kissed the back of it. “You’ve only saved me.” “Niko,” she whispered as I shoved the bandage back into place and pulled her against me, wrapping my arms around her. “It’s the truth.” “You saved me too,” she said, tipping her head back to look up at me.

I leaned down and kissed her. I wanted her to know just how much she meant to me. I’d never cared much about showing people that side of myself, but w...

“Niko West. Who knew you were so chivalrous?” “Only for you,” I said, leaning down and claiming that sweet mouth. Just like I planned to do for the rest of my life.

But I didn’t need a blade to fight off Vivian’s ex-boyfriend. I’d be happy to use my fists if necessary. I had a hunch he wouldn’t be coming around for a while.

“What are you struggling with? Do you love her?” “Of course. More than anything. I just don’t know if I’m cut out for the whole white picket fence bullshit. I don’t know if that’s me. But I know I want to spend my life with her.” It felt good to say it to him. He’d been more like a father to me than anyone. I respected him. Hell, he was one of the most decent people I’d ever known.

You aren’t your father. He robbed you of your childhood. Don’t give him your future too. Go be all the things that you want to be.”

“I’ve seen you with Vivian, and I have no doubt that you make her happy. That’s all I care about. If you want to live together first, I’ll give you my blessing, as long as you make me a promise.” “What’s that?” I asked. “You don’t let fear hold you back from making my girl happy too, all right?” “I can do that.”

“I know you can. That’s the only reason I’m on board with this.” He raised a brow. “Thank you, Jack.” “Don’t thank me. Just do right by my girl.”...

He’d been the missing piece all along. I always thought maybe the empty spot in my heart had belonged to my mother. I’d never felt complete during my years with Jansen, and I’d written it off to the fact that I was grieving. But everything had changed since Niko and I had admitted our feelings for one another. That hole had gotten smaller. The loneliness that I’d often felt had gone away. I was the happiest I’d ever been, and happier than I’d ever thought possible.

“And who are you close to, Niko West?” “You, Honey Bee. Always you.”

“I’m looking for an engagement ring for Vivian,” I said, and I couldn’t wipe the ridiculous smile from my face. I never thought I’d be shopping for rings, but once we moved in together, I knew this was something that I needed to do.

didn’t know when I became such a sap, but I didn’t mind it. Not when it came to her.

Maybe we just had a gift for recognizing one another’s pain. But he’d call me more than usual, check in more, and help me out of the funk that usually followed.

He was here. He’d always been here when I needed him most.

Vivian didn’t live in darkness like I often did. It was an unfamiliar feeling for her, and I wanted to take it away.

“How do you always know what I need?” “Because I know you, Vivian Thomas.” “Better than anyone. You always have,” she said.

I’d been through some shit in my life, no doubt about it. But seeing Vivian hurt the way she did that day—it would stay with me forever. She’d put on a brave face for her family because it’s who she was. She was strong and fierce and protective. But she hurt like the rest of us. And if I could be here to take some of that away, I’d do it over and over again.

“Don’t let that freak you out,” Vivian said when we got in the car. “I’m not thinking about babies.” The weird thing—I was imagining a house full of little Vivis. And it didn’t freak me out at all. And that alone completely freaked me out.

“I wish my mom could see my sisters all grown up. How amazing they’re doing. The woman was giddy if one of us got a good grade on a paper or made a sports team. But Everly’s about to be a sports psychologist for a professional team. Dylan’s going to law school. Charlotte’s changing lives every day in the classroom. And Ashlan is out there conquering college like a rock star. I wish she was here to see it.”

“And what about you, Honey Bee?” I pulled up in front of Honey Mountain Café, and we watched as Jack led his daughters inside. I turned to face her as she unbuckled and looked at me. “What do you mean?” She tilted her head and smiled.

“Sticking around here and getting your degree nearby so you could keep an eye on your sisters. Saving every penny to buy the bakery and turning it into something everyone in this town loves. Buying your first home before the age of twenty-four. Employing your sisters when they need it. And rocking my fucking world every day by just breathing.”

“I love you, Niko West. Yesterday and today wouldn’t have been tolerable if you weren’t here by my side. Thank you.”

I’d never been big on birthdays, but Vivian always made it a big deal. She’d made me a cake every year since fifth grade. Always trying new recipes and making it special. This year would be different because we were together, and I couldn’t think of a better gift.

There was no life for me without Vivian. Without Mabel.

I’d been in hundreds of fires. But my heart had never raced like this. Because everything I loved was behind that door.

I don’t know if I ran down the stairs or jumped as the flames blazed beneath my feet, because adrenaline took over and I flew through the doorway with Vivian in my arms.

“I’ve got her,” I hissed. “Don’t you fucking touch her.” I laid her down and stroked her face as they pushed me back and secured oxygen over her mouth and nose.

“Come on, Honey Bee. Breathe. You’re okay, baby,” I shouted over their shoulders, and my voice was unrecognizable. Fear. Terror. It was all there. I couldn’t see through my tear-streaked vision.

Because that’s what family did. I realized as I looked around the hospital room and thought about everyone who’d gathered in the waiting room, that my family was here. Jack and his daughters, my sister and Mabel, and the guys from the firehouse. But the most important one was hooked up to tubes and lying in a bed after surviving a brutal fire.

“I love you, Honey Bee.”

I spent the rest of the night watching her sleep and thanking God that she was okay. Because I couldn’t exist in a world that Vivian Thomas wasn’t in. I knew it. She knew it.

And apparently God knew it because we’d gotten her out of there in time. And everything would be okay as long as she was okay.

“Since we decided to give this a try, I’ve realized a lot of things, Vivi.” “Yeah? What things?” “Well, us being together has made me look at everything differently. My life. My future. What I thought I wanted. Needed.”

“What do you want and need, Niko?” My voice was all tease. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a little black velvet box. My breath caught in my throat. “Only you, Honey Bee. I think you were mine the first time I met you. I think you’ve always been mine.” “And you’ve always been mine,” I whispered as tears streamed down my face.

“I want to spend my life with you. And I never thought I’d say this, I had a whole speech planned for my birthday when I asked you to be my wife. I was going to tell you that we’d figure the kid thin...

“But after that fire. I sat in that hospital room watching you sleep that night and I realized what a pussy I’d been. I’d been scared about having a family and failing, but I realized that night, that I’m not my father. I am capable of loving deeply and I know it because I swear to Christ if you hadn’t survived that fire, I wouldn’t have survived either, Honey Bee.

I would have died in those flames right along with you if I had to. I want you to be my wife. I want to put as many babies in you as you’re willing to have. And I want to start our future now. You and me, and a bunch of little Vivians running around.”