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January 26 - January 31, 2023
STRATEGY #2: IDENTIFY YOUR EMOTIONAL STATE
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Before we can let go of something, we need to know how it’s affecting our emotions.
It causes a ripple effect that extends to other areas of our life.
The ability to comprehend, evaluate, and manage our emotional state is known as emotional intelligence (EQ). It involves deep introspection into how we’re feeling, why we’re feeling this way, how these feelings are affecting us, and whether we need to take action to manage them.
first step toward doing this is to find a quiet place to sit and think.
Second, we should ask ourself a simple, two-pronged question: “What am I feeling and what is causing me to feel this way?”
Third, we reflect on how these emotions are affecting our behaviors — at our workplace, with our friends, with our loved ones, and even when we’re alone.
we write everythi...
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EXERCISE #2
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STRATEGY #3: FIND AN OUTLET FOR YOUR NEGATIVE EMOTIONS
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Having an outlet doesn’t resolve the emotions. But it gives us a way to release some of the stress and anxiety they create so that they don’t overwhelm us.
Many people find emotional solace in physical activity. They visit the gym. They participate in sports. They clean their house. They go for a run.
Others find comfort in talking to friends.
Still others find relaxing activities, such as reading, meditating, or painting, ease their stress
Forcing ourself to do things we enjoy short circuits the pattern of negative thoughts and emotions that dominate our headspace.
EXERCISE #3
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Identify five activities that make you feel good. They should be reliable and consistent. They make you feel happy, relaxed, satisfied, or inspired every time you do them. Make certain they’re simple and easy.
STRATEGY #4: DETERMINE WHETHER YOUR NEEDS ARE BEING MET
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When we have difficulty letting go of something, it’s often because we believe it was meeting one of our needs.
this misperception not only sabotages our ability to let go, but also prevents us from getting our needs actually met.
EXERCISE #4
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Find a quiet space and contemplate your personal needs. Ask yourself what you need in order to feel satisfied. Write down everything that comes to mind.
scrutinize every toxic relationship, unfortunate decision, or personal grievance you’re holding on to in light of them. Audit them one by one, asking yourself “does this thing actually meet any of the needs I’ve identified?”
STRATEGY #5: IDENTIFY WHAT GIVES YOUR LIFE PURPOSE
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Purpose gives our life meaning and plays a critical role in whether we feel fulfilled or dissatisfied.
When we’re clear about our purpose, we’re optimistic. We recognize that life has a lot to offer and want to take advantage of opportunities to enjoy it. We know what we’re supposed to do, or are at least confident that we can figure it out.
when we don’t know what gives us purpose, we feel bored, empty, and anxious. We m...
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what gives us purpose today may be different tomorrow.
EXERCISE #5
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Question #1: “What makes me happy?”
Question #2: “What moves me?”
Question #3: “What am I good at?”
Question #4: “What are my biggest fears?”
Question #5: “If I knew I was going to pass away in five years, how would I spend my remaining time?”
Question #6: “Who would I like to be 10 years from today?”
Question #7: “If I look back on my life near its end, how would I imagine having lived it successfully?”
STRATEGY #6: ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR EMOTIONAL PAIN
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But in order to let go of the pain, we have to confront it head on. We have to face it without distraction. Only then can we release it, grieve when necessary, and move on with our life.
EXERCISE #6
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start a journal. In this journal write down what you’re feeling. Be as specific as possible.
set your journal aside, close your eyes, and identify the event, circumstance, or source of these feelings.
Describe the origin of your emotional pain. Be concise. One or two sentences should be adequate.
start an entry in the format of a brief letter to yourself. In this letter, explain what happened and how it made you feel.
Writing this letter gives you an opportunity to acknowledge your pain and express your feelings. It makes them more tangible and palpable. This, in turn, makes it easier to accept what you’re feeling as authentic, embrace the pain, and understand why you’re feeling it.
STRATEGY #7: LOOK FOR IMPORTANT LESSONS
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Our mistakes present terrific learning opportunities. When we’re willing to examine them, they help us to identify our activities, behaviors, and decisions that resulted in undesirable outcomes.
we train ourself to consistently look for enlightenment in things that evoke our negative emotions, the practice will eventually become second nature to us.
EXERCISE #7
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“Why do I feel regret over this?”
Does your regret or remorse stem from something you did? If so, what was it?
