The Perfect Child

by Lucinda Berry

“I have to protect my family,” she said. “But she’s your family.” “No, Christopher. She’s not. I didn’t adopt her—you did.”

“Of course. I’d do anything for you guys.”

hadn’t wanted to take the kids but couldn’t bear the thought of saying no to Christopher. I wouldn’t have been able to sleep knowing I could’ve done something to ease his burden and chose not to.

I’d give anything to be breaking divorce news to her instead of what I was about to do. I felt so much responsibility for the moment of telling her.

but the Bauers were like family.

Janie’s feet never moved from their spot—not for seven minutes and thirty-two seconds.

But I could tell by Piper’s voice when I had called her afterward that she was lying when she said it didn’t mean anything and that it happened all the time. She’d had no idea she’d been removed from Janie’s case.

she seemed more like a soldier who’d been to war and returned home.

I loved Janie in ways I couldn’t describe or understand. I probably never would. Even after everything she’d done.

I was running out of steam. No one would ever see Janie through my eyes.

“His lawyers claim it was your duty to warn them about Janie’s problems. He says if you’d told them the things Janie did, like killing the cat or biting Hannah, then they never would’ve taken her into their home, and Allison would still be here.

“It’s a matter of public record once it’s filed. He just got ahold of it as soon as it was filed. He knows how much you guys mean to me.” She smiled warmly.

I let Christopher take him at night when he fussed and said nothing. That’s how I was supposed to parent now.

I’d expected coming home would be difficult, but it was harder than I had imagined. Our situation hung over us at all times. The walls were heavy with our story. Having Cole with us again didn’t make it any easier, even though I was grateful to have him back.

I hadn’t told Christopher yet, but I would when I was strong enough for the fight I’d be up against. He’d still trade his life for hers.

“‘Is this the devil child you were telling me about?’” Hannah had called her the same thing. A chill filled my insides.

Time and time again during the episodes, Becky tried to get close to her to comfort or calm her down, but Janie rejected each attempt, sometimes spitting at her, other times biting her arm.

I’ve been called to investigate abuse in foster homes almost as much as birth-parent homes. We have to operate within the system. Every social worker knows it’s broken, but it’s the only one we have, so we have to make do with it.” Luke raised his eyebrows. “So you’re saying you failed Becky?” “I’m saying the system failed them both.”

“The only thing I can tell them—the truth. Their daughter is a killer, and until she’s an adult, they’re responsible for making sure she doesn’t hurt another human being.”

Elaine had confided in me that Hannah had spoken with her about relinquishing her parental rights and rehoming Janie.

Unlike Christopher, I knew there were children who were too damaged to be fixed.

he would do it alone unless I was there for him.

I burst out laughing when he blew a spit bubble, then was immediately swallowed up by guilt because happiness felt like a betrayal to Allison.