Releasing 10 (Boys of Tommen, #6)

by Chloe Walsh

“Don’t tell Johnny,” he strangled out, chest heaving. “Please. I don’t want him to know anything about it.” “I won’t,” I promised, already knowing that Gibs didn’t want anyone outside of the family to know. “I haven’t told him anything before, have I?” “No,” he croaked out, sniffling. “But I haven’t told him about it, and I don’t want him to think badly of me.”

My poor baby :(

“Gibs, nobody could think badly of you,” I replied with a sigh. “You’re a good egg, lad, and Cap knows that.” “Liz does,” he sobbed. “She thinks badly of me.”

“Speaking of Liz,” I decided to add, knowing this could blow up in my face like it had on several previous occasions. “Have you thought any further about what she meant that day at the grave?”

“Liz wouldn’t say it if there wasn’t some truth to it. That prick definitely did something to Caoimhe that night.”

“I will always protect you,” I promised, locking eyes on his tearful, gray ones. “Do you hear me? I will always be here to look after you. And I know you haven’t done anything wrong, okay? So, don’t for one second think that I’m ever going to turn my back on you. Blood or not, you’re my baby brother and you always will be.” “But?” Gibs interjected with a sniffle. “But she needs me,” I forced myself to say, feeling my heart boom like a drum in my chest. “Do you understand?” Gibs shook his head, looking up at me like a lost puppy. “No.”

“I don’t want you to turn your back on Liz,” he croaked out weakly. “I don’t want her to not be my friend.” “Maybe Liz will come around,” Claire offered in a hopeful tone. “When she’s not so sad anymore.” “She’s never not going to be sad,” Gibsie replied, sniffling again. “Trust me, that kind of sadness never goes away. The world just stops seeing it.”

He is your boyfriend, after all.” “Shut up.” My eyes widened to saucers. “You’re lying.” Hugh chuckled down the line. “So, what do you say, milady. Will you house a brave knight for the summer?”

“I managed to talk my mother into it,” he confirmed, sounding smug. “Well, I managed to emotionally blackmail her into it, but a win’s a win.”

“I’m not Claire,” I strangled out, feeling too damn much in this moment. “I see. I hear. I observe. So don’t try to keep me from her when you would never leave him!” No matter how badly he drags the rest of us down. “I guess the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree, does it?”

The monster’s gone, a voice that sounded awfully like my sister echoed in my mind. You’re free now. No, I wasn’t. Because the monster might have been gone, but I would never be free of him. Of the things he did to me.

The Boys of Tommen

“Yeah, well, I’ll take dog shit any day over Carlton bleeding Banks,” Kav grumbled before he proceeded to physically wrestle the blazer off our friend. “No best friend of mine is walking around with a target on his back.” “You just called me your best friend.” “No, I didn’t.” “Yeah, you did.” “No, I bleeding didn’t.” “Yes, you did!” “Yes, you did, Jonathan, admit it.” “It was a minor slip of the tongue, Gerard. Don’t read into it.” “Say it.” “No.” “Say it or I’m putting the blazer back on,” Gibs warned, snatching the blazer back. Kav narrowed his eyes in challenge. “You wouldn’t dare.” “Oh no,” Gibs said loud enough to draw attention to us as he made an exhibition of feeding his arm through one of the sleeves. “If only I had a best friend to show me the way.” “Fine—fine!” Kav snapped, snatching the blazer back. “You’re my best friend,” he grumbled, balling the fabric up and stuffing it into his bag. “Are ya happy now?” “Ecstatic!” Gibsie exclaimed, and I swear if he had a tail in this moment, it would have been wagging. He turned back to us and grinned. “Johnny called me his best friend.” “He sure did, Gibs,” Feely and I laughed in unison, thoroughly amused by the horrified expression on Cap’s face. “He must love ya, lad.” “Yeah, well, it’s a coercive relationship status at best,” Kav grumbled, closing his bag and tossing it over his shoulder. “And loosen that tie, will ya?” he added, giving his best friend a final once-over. “You’re heading into a classroom, Gibs, not a c...

“See the blond over there, the one with the ponytail?” Feely gestured toward a group of girls sitting at the table opposite ours. “She full on grabbed my ass at the lockers this morning, and when I turned around, she didn’t even look away. She just stood there and winked at me.” “No shit,” I laughed. “What did you say to her?” “I didn’t have a fucking chance,” he replied, pulling at the collar of his shirt. “She laid it on me before I could get a word out.” “What do you mean she laid it on you?” “I mean she stuck her tongue in my mouth!”

“Look around ya, Biggsie,” Pierce replied, sounding genuinely confused by my reaction. “Why would you want to be tied down to the same girl you’ve been with since primary school when you could get with a hundred girls here?” “Because I don’t want any of these girls.” “How can you say that?” “Because I already have the girl I want.” “But how can you know for sure if you don’t at least test the waters?” he continued to push. “You’re a shoo-in for the number ten jersey, lad. You’re going to have girls falling at your feet, and you’re telling me you’re going to give that all up for—”

Pierce said all of that just to go for her when they broke up

“Why don’t you shoot your shot with her,” I challenged, locking eyes on the dopey bollocks in front of me. “Or are you too much of a pussy to actually walk up to a girl and speak to her?” “I’m not interested in your sloppy seconds, lad,” Pierce laughed. “Although, I would absolutely make an exception for that girlfriend of yours.” Waggling his brows, he teased, “Be sure to pass her over when you’re done.”

This asshole was really not joking when he said that

you shouldn’t have said that,” Feely groaned, dropping his head in his hands. “You really shouldn’t have said that, lad,” Robbie Mac added grimly. “Bad form.” “Yeah.” Roughly shoving my chair back, I jerked to my feet and moved for him. “You really shouldn’t have said that, asshole.”

“Liz.” There was a long pause down the line before he spoke. “I’m sorry, baby, but you know he’s my friend.”

She was out there. I could feel it. The monster had disappeared. But the scary lady was always watching.

“Thanks for staying with me tonight. It means everything to me.” “And you mean everything to me,” I reminded her, stroking her arm with the one I had draped over her. “Besides, we’ve rang in every new year together since 1994, and I have no plans for breaking the tradition.”

“Yes. Both Mrs. Allen’s stepson and biological son are listed as victims in her complaint.” Victims. Did I hear that right? They were victims?

“No, Liz.” Breaking our kiss, he pulled back to look at me, breathing uneven. “We can’t do things like that yet.” “Why not?” “Because we’re not ready.” Tears filled my eyes, and I choked out a pained sob. “I wish I could get you to understand.” “Then tell me,” he urged. “I’m here, Liz. I’m always listening.” I knew he was, and that broke my heart a little bit more because I didn’t want him to see and run. To turn away from me. To think I was dirty and tainted. Because I was supposed to be his. I belonged to him, but a part of me had been stolen. And I needed him to put it back for me.

My only reprieve was the fact that Gibs wasn’t staring at my girlfriend’s tits, but even that was a double-edged sword, because I knew if I followed his line of sight, it would lead to my sister’s tits.

“Don’t!” Roughly shaking her hand off, my girlfriend spun around to glare at my sister. “Don’t defend what you don’t know.” Tears streamed down her cheeks. “You don’t know what I know.” She sucked in a shuddering breath. “You didn’t see what I saw.”

“I’m not leaving,” I vowed hoarsely. “I’m staying right here with you.” Exhaling a ragged breath, she sagged forward and rested her forehead against mine. “N-no m-matter w-what?” “Yeah, Liz.” I clenched my eyes shut and exhaled a ragged breath. “No matter what.”

“You have a place in my heart and that will never change.” Tears trickled down my cheeks. Sniffling, I squeezed her hand back. “That’s my girl.”

“Have you always been this mistrustful?” No. There were moments in time, back when I was a little girl, that I thought I could be happy.

It had been two years, four months, and six days since they pulled my sister’s body from the water, and it had been two years, two months, and eight days since he left town.

Yeah, and I didn’t deserve it. Her pride was misplaced because if she knew the real me, she wouldn’t feel that way. If she knew about my bad thoughts or the things I craved, she would be repulsed.

“I have to say, I’ve missed seeing him around the house, too—although not nearly as much as your father has.” Yeah, I was quietly confident that my father loved my boyfriend more than he loved me. Things were tense at home, with my parents’ relationship on the rocks since the funeral, but Dad really seemed to snap out of his bad mood whenever Hugh came around.

“Do you think Shannon will be okay at BCS, Liz?” No. “Yeah, Claire, I do.” “Really?” “Absolutely,” I replied, even though my heart plummeted at the thought of Shannon alone in a new school. “She has her brother.” “Yeah, and he won’t let those mean bullies hurt her.”

“You’ve got this, Claire Biggs,” I promised, pulling her closer. “Give it a month, and you’ll be the school’s sunshine sweetheart.” “You really think so?” “I know so.” “What about you?” “Me?” “Yeah, what will you be?” “You can’t have sunshine without rain,” I offered with a shrug. “I’ll be the school raincloud.” That made her laugh, and I was glad because it was important to me that this girl never lost her shine. Like I did.

“Have you any idea how the other 99 percent of lads struggle?” “Says the fella sticking his dick in anything with a pulse since his fifteenth birthday.” “Hey! I never said I was part of the 99 percent, asshole,” he shot back with a laugh. “Besides, someone has to fly the solo flag.” “Yeah, and you do more than enough flag waving for the rest of us,” I grumbled, giving him the side-eye. Feely shrugged unapologetically. “It’s my hands.” He raised one for emphasis and wiggled his fingers. “Guitar fingers, lad.” “Get that thing out of my face before I puke on you,” I warned, slapping his hand away.

“Yeah.” Feely rolled his eyes. “Which means he’s had a lot of sex with a lot of different girls.” “What’s this about, Feely?” Kav snapped, sounding irritated. “If sex was off the cards, would you use fingers or tongue to get her off?” “Jesus Christ, Pa,” I choked out, appalled. “Hypothetically?” Kav offered, sounding mildly interested now. “Of course.” “In what context?” “You and a random girl.” “Fingers,” Kav replied without hesitation. “No tongue.”

“And if you were in a committed, long-term relationship with her?” Johnny frowned like he didn’t understand the question. “If we were in a committed, long-term relationship, then why wouldn’t we be having sex?” Feely cracked up laughing. “I’m confused,” Kav admitted, brows furrowed. “Don’t worry about it,”

“Nice one, Feely. Now he thinks we’re deranged.” “Don’t worry about it, Hugh. He probably thinks we’re fucking each other.” “No offense, lad, but I’m way too far out of your league for him to think that.” “Whatever you say, virgin.” “Right back at ya, whore.”

“You are the hottest Luigi I have ever seen.” “Yeah, yeah.” I rolled my eyes. “Right back at ya, Mario.”

Christ, I couldn’t even think his name in my head, let alone speak it. On the rare occasion I had to address him by name, I used the only word that seemed to come out: the childhood pet name I had given him. It hurt a little less that way, and I could manipulate my mind to separate the two. Because the monster never said the name Thor.

“But I think it had more to do with Hugh asking you to be his girlfriend and Gerard not asking me—which I know you probably don’t want to hear me say,” she added with a wince. “Sorry.” “It’s okay,” I forced myself to say because I couldn’t project my pain on her. “I can’t be the friend you confide in about Thor, but I will always be the friend in your corner.” Her eyes lit up with excitement. “And I can’t be the friend you talk to about my brother—because that’s just ew—but I will always be the friend in your corner, too.”

“And a relief to know my grandson had the good sense to hold on to you.” He winked again at Hugh. “Good lad, yourself.” “Like I’d be thick enough to let her go,” Hugh chuckled, tucking me into his side. He dropped a kiss to my head before adding, “Liz is the one, Granda.” Oh God. My entire body burned with heat. The way he so openly claimed me as his, even to his grandfather, made me feel like I might be actually worth something.

“Uh, a little privacy!” some random girl squealed, as she rolled around on my boyfriend’s bed with a vaguely familiar-looking boy on top of her. “Goddammit, Feely!” “My apologies, Hughie.” “Out!” Hugh ordered, leaning heavily against the door to support both our weights. “Now!” “Yeah, Feely,” I snickered, watching through bleary eyes as our friend grabbed a pile of clothes and hurried out of the room, with a semi-naked girl hot on his heels.

“Keep going, Hugh. Please, please! Make me better.” Make her better? It was a strange comment to make in the throes of passion, but I was too drunk and too fucking lost in the moment to care. Overcome by lust, I relished how tight and hot and wet she felt.

“Whoa,” she breathed as a smile began to spread across her face. “That was amazing.” Feeling proud of myself, I gently withdrew my fingers and smiled. “Look at that grin,” she teased, reaching up to squeeze my cheek. “You look like the cat that got the cream.” “Uh, Liz.” “Sorry. Bad analogy.”

It didn’t matter how well things went or how hard I tried. I would never be enough for them to be happy. I would never be enough for my father.

Patrick, the sneak, was already righting his wrong by hiding his drumsticks under the table. “Why thank you, Patrick, pet,” Sinead said approvingly. “In future, though, please refrain from using my solid oak table as a soundboard for your rhythm sticks.”

Turning my hand over, Hugh continued his mission of killing me with his touch, thumb tracing the jagged edges of every self-borne scar I had inflicted on my flesh. He didn’t falter and he didn’t recoil. He touched my skin with a reverence that could never be matched. Not in a hundred thousand lifetimes. That’s how I knew that I would never get over this boy.

“No, I’m the cute and endearing one,” my sister argued. “You’re the complete ride.” “You’ve got that right,” I chimed in, causing Liz to snicker and Claire to groan. “Ew, Hugh,” she snapped. “I’m legit right here.”

“We have a movie night to prepare for.” “Okay, okay,” Liz laughed. “I’m coming.” “Have fun,” I said, stretching up for a kiss from my girlfriend, only to receive a platonic pat on the head instead. Thanks, Claire.

“Today was a good day.” He rested his hand on my knee and sighed in contentment. “A good day, baby.” Yeah, it was. “I love being here,” I told him, feeling my body soften right along with my heart. “With you.” “Me too, Liz.” He gave my knee a reassuring squeeze. “Me too.”

“No, you weren’t caged in a cell to do your exams,” Gibs corrected with a bite to his tone. “Meanwhile, I was in a special little room all by my lonesome, with a man, who I can only describe as the reincarnation of Smithers, to write down my answers, and that freaky fucking guidance counselor Miss Moore chaperoning.” His gray eyes widened right along with his outrage. “And she’s pregnant, Patrick. You know how stressed pregnant bellies make me get.”

“Getting ready for what?” “Tonight’s disco in town.” “And before you even start the bullshit I can’t, I have training tomorrow protests, just know that you are coming,” Gibsie interjected. “It’s happening, Cap, get with the program.” “Because I can’t,” Kav urged. “I do have training tomorrow.” “Then clear your schedule,” Gibs replied, draping an arm over his shoulder. “Because tonight, you’re out with the lads.”