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February 5 - October 1, 2018
what he or she feels strongly about, and what his or her proudest achievements are.
If you are informed enough to step comfortably into their world and talk knowledgeably, their appreciation will be tangible.
everything you can to prepare, you still have to reach beyond the odd collection of data points that add up to our public identity and get to someone as an individual.
Food, I find, has a unique ability to facilitate conversation.
The idea is to find a point of common ground that is deeper and richer than what can be discovered in a serendipitous encounter.
“I always make a special effort to inquire about the people I’d like to meet.”
I wouldn’t have been able to reach out to these individuals, and truly connect, without doing my homework.
Once you’ve taken the time to figure out what your mission is and where you want to get to, the next step is to identify the people who can help you get there.
Clay Shirky summed it up in 2008, and he’s still right: “The problem isn’t information overload, it’s filter failure.”
establish a viable business model, and either find a major investor or sell the company to a well-heeled strategic acquirer.
First, I sat down and established ninety-day, one-year, and three-year goals in my Relationship Action Plan. Each goal required me to connect with and develop different parts of my network.
Take the time to list people such as:
The people who are on Crain’s “40 Under 40” aren’t necessarily the forty best businesspeople. They are, however, probably the forty most connected.
Remember, if you’re organized, focused, and a stickler for taking names, there’s no one who’s out of reach.
You’re never going to be completely ready to meet new people; there is no perfect moment.
Your fears will never be completely quieted, because inviting rejection is never going to be appealing.
You have to envision yourself winning to win.
Frequently, people won’t get back to you. You have to put your ego aside and persist in calling or writing.
used my four rules for what I call warm calling: (1) Convey credibility by mentioning a familiar person or institution—in this case, John, Jeff, and WebMD. (2) State your value proposition: Jeff’s new product would help Serge sell his new products. (3) Impart urgency and convenience by being prepared to do whatever it takes whenever it takes to meet the other person on his or her own terms. (4) Be prepared to offer a compromise that secures a definite follow-up at a minimum.
Credibility is the first thing you want to establish in any interaction, and, ultimately, no one will buy from you unless you establish trust.
When researching for a connection to the people you want to meet, first do some reconnaissance about the company and industry they’re selling in.
Don’t ever talk at someone. Give them time to come along with you.
Secretaries and assistants are more than just helpful associates to their bosses. If they are any good, they become trusted friends, advocates, and integral parts of their professional, and even personal, lives.
What does it mean to treat them with dignity? Acknowledge their help. Thank them by phone, or with flowers or a note.
Above all, never, ever disappear.
Building a network of friends and colleagues is about building relationships and friendships.
The point is, I’m constantly looking to include others in whatever I’m doing.
“The value of a network grows proportional to the square of the number of its users. In the case of the Internet, every new computer, every new server, and every new user added expands the possibilities for everyone else who’s already there.
Host a “virtual happy hour” once a month and organize it around a discussion topic.
Once a month, ask group members to bring a friend to introduce to the group.
When it comes to meeting people, it’s not only whom you get to know but also how and where you get to know them.
Shared interests are the basic building blocks of any relationship.
Race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, ethnicity, or business, professional, and personal interests are relational glue.
That’s why you have to pay special attention to where you’re most comfortable and what activities you most enjoy.
When we are truly passionate about something, it’s contagious.
It shows them that I think so highly of them that I’m willing to share such a deeply personal part of my life.
When our relationships are stronger, our businesses and careers are more successful.
Make a list of the things you’re most passionate about. Use your passions as a guide to which activities and events you should be seeking out. Use them to engage new and old contacts.
Fifteen minutes and a cup of coffee.
Conferences.
3. Invite someone to share a workout or a hobby (golf, chess, stamp collecting, a book club, etc.).
Volunteering.
When your day is fueled by passion, filled with interesting people to share it with, reaching out will seem less like a challenge or a chore and more like an effortless consequence of the way you work.
I can’t say this strongly enough: When you meet someone with whom you want to establish a relationship, take the extra little step to ensure you won’t be lost in their mental attic.
The follow-up I remember best is the one I got first.
Give yourself between twelve and twenty-four hours after you meet someone to follow up.
Why go to all the trouble of meeting new people if you’re not going to work on making them a part of your life?
Military strategists know that most battles are won before the first shot is fired. The side that determines where, when, and how an engagement is fought usually gains an insurmountable advantage.
Turning a conference into your own turf and setting goals ahead of time is what shifts a casual conference attendance into a mission.
They provide a forum to meet the kind of like-minded people who can help you fulfill your mission and goals. Before deciding to attend a conference,
