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Kindle Notes & Highlights
by
David Deida
Read between
June 13 - December 30, 2023
If you remain full and strong, humorous and happy, your truth unperturbed by her testing, then you pass the test.
It will last, perhaps, ten minutes. And then she will test you again.
It never ends.
A woman will always test her man for the pleasure of feeling his strength in loving, his capacity to transcend nuisance, his persistence in his own truth, and his capacity to share that truth in love with her, even wh...
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Her complaint is the beginning of her pleasure. It is not true criticism, but a test of your Shiva-hood. The criticism is entirely dissolved in love as soon as she feels you...
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Your woman is testing you because she loves you. She wants to feel your truth. She wants to feel your love.
The most loving women are the women who will test you the most. She wants you to be your fullest, most magnificent self. She won’t settle for anything less. She knows it is true of you. She knows in your deepest heart you are free, you are Shiva. Anything less than that she will torment. And, as you know, she’s quite good at it. Yet, if your purpose is to be free, you wouldn’t have it any other way.
Never base your plans on what a woman says she wants to do, unless she is in the full flow of love when she says it.
The masculine grows by challenge, but the feminine grows by praise. A man must be unabashed and expressed in his appreciation for his woman. Praise her freely.
Men grow by challenge.
When speaking to your woman, it is always better to call the glass half full than half empty.
you must learn to praise the very qualities you feel are not yet praiseworthy in order for them to become so.
Praising the things you really enjoy when she exercises will magnify her exercising.
Praise works. Information doesn’t.
Praise motivates. Challenge doesn’t.
Praise specific things you love about your woman 5 to 10 times a day. ...
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Intimacy is about growing more than you could by yourself, through the art of mutual gifting.
The feminine part of your woman is either opening in loving surrender (easy moments) or closing in what ends up being an emotional test of your capacity to open her (difficult moments). This cycle of the feminine is like all cycles in nature: it never ends.
A superior man sees his woman’s moods not as a curse, but as a challenge and an amusement.
She wants to be able to trust him in his direction.
One of the deepest feminine pleasures is when a man stands full, present, and unreactive in the midst of his woman’s emotional storms. When he stays present with her, and loves her through the layers of wildness and closure, then she feels his trustability, and she can relax.
The game of life is to find each situation workable, to transform each occasion through the magnification of love, to give your fullest gift in every moment, and to have no attachments to the outcome, knowing it’s all going to rise and fall and rise again.
You have mastered women and the world when no desire either to avoid or attain sways your loving or limits your freedom.
The feminine is an infinite source of love, inspiration, and power, both physically and spiritually.
This is what you get in a woman with a feminine sexual essence: A woman who is all over the place emotionally.
The more you seek a woman who gives you everything, the less you get of anything.
Other women are hot. They are fiery, tempestuous, and quick of temper. You might have spoken of a “fiery red-head” or a “hot-blooded Latina.”
If you are a particularly easygoing man, perhaps a man who has difficulty getting motivated, then a hot woman is probably better for you.
In the end, you must make your own choice.
Choose a Woman Who Chooses You
The priority of the masculine core is mission, purpose, or direction in life.
The priority of the feminine core is the flow of love in intimacy.
Sometimes a woman will make a request of her man in plain English, not to get him to do something, but to see if he is so weak that he will
do it.
If you are a weak man, this feminine trait of wanting one thing and asking for another will piss you off.
Your woman will ask you to do all kinds of things, every day. Do not allow yourself to be swayed from your truth, from the direction of your heart. Underneath your woman’s superficial request is her actual desire and need: she wants your passionate fullness to pervade her, she wants to be able to trust the unshakability of your loving, she wants to feel in her bones that your divine masculine presence is stronger than your distractibility.
Your woman is a form of the goddess, taunting you, testing you, seducing you, ready to chop your head off with her wrath if you are weak and ambiguous in your truth, and ready to surrender to the force of your loving if you are steady and brilliant in your loving consciousness.
And if she is disappointed by your deepest truth, you shouldn’t be with her.
The thing your woman is complaining about is rarely the thing she is complaining about.
When she complains about financial issues, she is usually feeling a lack in your masculine capacity to direct your life with clarity, purpose, integrity, and wisdom.
The deeper issue is that you didn’t do what you said you would.
it shows you don’t follow through with your word, with your purpose.
Your word is a demonstration of your purpose, of your masculine core.
You must listen to your woman more as an oracle than as an advisor.
She usually is speaking in a very tangential, but revelatory, style. She is revealing your unconscious habits that prevent your fullest awakening in consciousness.
Your unconsciousness cause...
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Hear her complaint as the universe giving you signs about your life.
Sometimes you need the recreation, but sometimes you are just being lazy, trying to forget the responsibilities you have created in your life.
If she’s got to remind you of the job interview or the mess in the garage, she’s supplying the masculine direction for the both of you.
A woman really wants her man to be totally dedicated to his highest purpose—and also to love her fully.
