David Deida


Born
in Cleveland, The United States
March 18, 1958

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David Deida is an American author who writes about the sexual and spiritual relationship between men and women.[1] His ten books have been published in 25 languages. He conducts spiritual growth and intimacy workshops and is one of the many founding associates at the Integral Institute. He has conducted research and taught classes at the University of California at Santa Cruz, Lexington Institute in Boston, San Jose State University and Ecole Polytechnique in Paris. He is the author of numerous essays, articles, and books on human spirituality including The Way of the Superior Man, Finding God Through Sex and Blue Truth and the autobiographical novel Wild Nights.

Average rating: 4.07 · 15,187 ratings · 1,062 reviews · 27 distinct worksSimilar authors
The Way of the Superior Man...

4.10 avg rating — 12,274 ratings — published 1997 — 41 editions
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Dear Lover: A Woman's Guide...

3.85 avg rating — 695 ratings — published 2002 — 14 editions
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Blue Truth: A Spiritual Gui...

4.13 avg rating — 438 ratings — published 2005 — 8 editions
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The Enlightened Sex Manual:...

4.03 avg rating — 463 ratings — published 2004 — 15 editions
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Intimate Communion: Awakeni...

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4.02 avg rating — 314 ratings — published 1995 — 10 editions
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It's A Guy Thing: A Owner's...

3.75 avg rating — 281 ratings — published 1997 — 11 editions
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Wild Nights: Conversations ...

3.92 avg rating — 230 ratings — published 2000 — 7 editions
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Finding God Through Sex: Aw...

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4.03 avg rating — 210 ratings — published 2005 — 10 editions
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Instant Enlightenment: Fast...

3.45 avg rating — 219 ratings — published 2007 — 7 editions
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Naked Buddhism: 39 Ways To ...

4.21 avg rating — 39 ratings
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“Everything you do right now ripples outward and affects everyone. Your posture can shine your heart or transmit anxiety. Your breath can radiate love or muddy the room in depression. Your glance can awaken joy. Your words can inspire freedom. Your every act can open hearts and minds.”
David Deida, Blue Truth: A Spiritual Guide to Life & Death and Love & Sex

“Austerity means to eliminate the comforts and cushions in your life that you have learned to snuggle into and lose wakefulness. Take away anything that dulls your edge. No newspapers or magazines. No TV. No candy, cookies, or sweets. No sex. No cuddling. No reading of anything at all while you eat or sit on the toilet. Reduce working time to a necessary minimum. No movies. No conversation that isn't about truth, love, or the divine.

If you take on these disciplines for a few weeks, as well as any other disciplines that may particularly cut through your unique habits of dullness, then your life will be stripped of routine distraction. All that will be left is the edge you have been avoiding by means of your daily routine. You will have to face the basic discomfort and dissatisfaction that is the hidden texture of your life. You will be alive with the challenge of living your truth, rather than hiding form it.

Unadorned suffering is the bedmate of masculine growth. Only by staying intimate with your personal suffering can you feel through it to its source. By putting all your attention into work, TV, sex, and reading, your suffering remains unpenetrated, and the source remains hidden. Your life becomes structured entirely by your favorite means of sidestepping the suffering you rarely allow yourself to feel. And when you do touch the surface of your suffering, perhaps in the form of boredom, you quickly pick up a magazine or the remote control.

Instead, feel your suffering, rest with it, embrace it, make love with it. Feel your suffering so deeply and thoroughly that you penetrate it, and realize its fearful foundation. Almost everything you do, you do because you are afraid to die. And yet dying is exactly what you are doing, from the moment you are born. Two hours of absorption in a good Super Bowl telecast may distract you temporarily, but the fact remains. You were born as a sacrifice. And you can either participate in the sacrifice, dissolving in the giving of your gift, or you can resist it, which is your suffering.

By eliminating the safety net of comforts in your life, you have the opportunity to free fall in this moment between birth and death, right through the hole of your fear, into the unthreatenable openness which is the source of your gifts. The superior man lives as this spontaneous sacrifice of love.”
David Deida, The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire

“If you are waiting for anything in order to live and love without holding back, then you suffer.”
David Deida, Blue Truth: A Spiritual Guide to Life & Death and Love & Sex

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