Abbey’s Comments (group member since Apr 30, 2018)

Abbey’s comments from the Nothing But Reading Challenges group.

Great work team! I had fun this round and can’t wait to continue cruising through some books in the next round. I definitely needed this type of challenge to ward off what was feeling like an impending reading slump - and so far it’s worked wonderfully!

Celia wrote: "Abbey wrote: "Celia wrote: "Abbey wrote: "...lately I've been trying to whittle down my library TBR on Libby (although I rarely input those into my GR TBR..."

You have two TBR's? *mind blown* How ..."

It's always hard knowing/remembering whats on Libby from my library, especially as I scroll aimlessly or in search of something else, so those tags have helped a lot. They are finicky to use sometimes, but it's nice for challenges to have a list of books I know are at my library to scroll through instead of working to locate a certain book.

I love learning how others organize their reading lives too! Your GR list with only one author is a great idea. If there is a series you like or an author with multiple books do you add a new book by them to your TBR once you have read the one on the list?

Celia wrote: "Abbey wrote: "...lately I've been trying to whittle down my library TBR on Libby (although I rarely input those into my GR TBR..."

You have two TBR's? *mind blown* How do you keep track/What's the..."

I tend to scroll/explore my library's digital content on Libby and "tag" a book with little bookstack emoji option they have, which puts it into a separate list. I belong to two libraries since I'm a grad student and joined the city/county library where my apartment is, but still have the library where I grew up as a valid card since it's still my permanent address and luckily both use Libby so it's super easy and all my "tags" from either library go into one "shelf".

I tend to do that when I'm missing aimlessly wandering the library or bookstores looking for new titles or books to add to my list, but especially even moreso now that I actually cannot go into the library. However, I'm the worst at remembering these "tags" in the first place to even go back and request them when I'm ready, or transfer them to Goodreads.

So, I guess my GR TBR is closer to my actual TBR (and the books I have unread on my physical shelves at home) and the library one is full of books I saw when scrolling/exploring and didn't really look further into. It's a lot of books later on in series I just started or some first books in a lot of series to see if I'd like them. Ideally I'd remember to put those in GR for one list, but this works (except for the times the "tags" have been completely removed by the Libby app and lost forever lol).

Angie ☯ wrote: "Ahhh....thank you! I just try to do what I'd like to see! :-)

You didn't jump the gun, Round 2 is there for anyone who wants to plan. And just so you know, we don't really check the tasks until th..."

Awesome! and good to know about the tasks for the future too :)

I usually don't plan my physical copies of books, but lately I've been trying to whittle down my library TBR on Libby (although I rarely input those into my GR TBR, so it's a losing battle of a dwindling a TBR lol) and have been going through it as I get the words/letters and just immediately borrowing ones that fit to read during the rounds of letter-based games like this one. So that helps my planning and helps me not ignore my library TBR, which I often forget I've even tagged in Libby :)

Day 3 Discussion Questions

10) I can't imagine the stress of trying to balance the knowledge of a fairly terminal prognosis with trying to be hopeful to live. I mean, we all know our days are numbered, but when you have an idea of what the number might be, you can either try to suck the marrow out of every day or curl up and try not to care enough to let anything hurt you more. Who do you think will have a bigger effect on the other, Will or Stella, and what do you hope will be the outcome, from a personal growth aspect?
This is a great question, although very tricky to answer! This may be the easy way out of this critical thinking question, but I think they may each have an equal effect on each other. Will hopefully will get his desire to live and extend his numbered days back from Stella and and Stella will hopefully through some age-appropriate mindless living back into her life from Will's influence. It's not that either of their current ways of living are wrong, but more that they'd both benefit from heading away from their respective extreme ends and compromising in the middle personality-wise.

11) Maybe I'm too cynical, but I kept feeling like Abby was used as the personification of the idea that "See, you never know how long you have to live, so..." and not flawed enough to be a real person. Did anyone else feel that way or am I being a meanie? I definitely thought Abby's role was a bit forced in this story. I do like that it shows that no one reaches their "limit" of tragedies either individually or as a family. I think sometimes people assume that if someone in your family has a terminal illness, nothing else could go wrong. Or on the flip side that if everything goes wrong, it is somehow a greater tragedy than the sum of its parts. So, while I didn't like the purpose of her sort of being there to remind anyone that life can end at any time, terminal illness or not, I did enjoy that the author didn't shy away from giving one family multiple "tragedies" (I put quotes there because I don't see a genetic condition/terminal illness as a tragedy per se, but it fits the idea here)

12) I loved Barb's parental takedown. Do you think the shift in Stella's parents will last?
If it were real life, I think not. I think it would certainly give a bit of a perspective shift, but one takedown by Barb would certainly not be enough most likely in real life to completely flip how two adults were acting permanently. Since this is a book/movie, I think the shift may last longer than in real life, but I'm still not sold on the idea that it will change everything permanently.

13) Reflecting on Barb's story of Amy and Trevor: would you choose a much shorter but immediately fuller life, or a longer lifespan though it may be less vibrant?
Gah, this question gets me every time it's asked in any format. I'd say shorter, but more vibrant life. However, I can never tell if this is the inner hero in me wanting to be brave and face an early death for immediate vibrancy and color in my shortened life. Or if it just sounds like the better option from afar. Based on how I live my life now, I know that if my years are of lesser quality, I'd rather have lower numbers of high quality years than more numbers of low quality years. So, we'll stick with my gut here and stop second guessing this question. :)

14) Poe says "It's my sickness...it's my problem." While it's admirable to strive for self-sufficiency, a main message of the book seems to be about how it's imperative to open up and do the work to nurture healthy, supportive relationships. What is your take on this? When in crisis, do you distance yourself or reach out?
As someone with a genetic chronic illness myself, this really resonates with me. I certainly lived my childhood and teenage years under Poe's philosophy, because it felt like the selfless thing to do. My parents raised all of my siblings and myself to be self-sufficient, independent humans and I think some of this backfired on me in the extreme growing up. I wanted NOTHING to do with help from anyone or even a hint that I may need help. Which I see now was ridiculous. But as a kid, it's easy to misconstrue life lessons taught by your parents to an extreme level, because you don't understand how to separate occasions where the lesson may not apply. So, I see Poe here falling under that, because he is still a teenager and hasn't fully seen the goodness of his peers willing to help and care for him. It feels different when it's family helping you, but another thing when people your age voluntarily step up. And unfortunately due to just general age/maturity, this often doesn't happen for most until young adulthood. People show up in deeper ways for their friends as they get older, and I think Poe's current mentality is a byproduct of just not having enough people show up in a way that he felt comfortable accepting help. Help is a tricky thing to accept, especially when chronically ill, so this "do it yourself" mentality is a way to gain control and avoid let downs when someone doesn't show up for the help they've promised. Healthy relationships are much better, but when you've only known the opposite, the independent spirit is one way to ensure you always have control.

You guys are awesome leaders - thanks Jenny and Angie!

I just did a quick look through my digital library "TBR" list and reserved ones that fit the tasks. I jumped the gun and added them all to the spreadsheet (with task assignments to come).

However - there is a cozy mystery series I'm halfway through with the MC having a "W" last name, so I can also swap some easier letters I found to keep the remaining 5 in the series for the next round too. Totally cool with anything, but if W trips some others up, the Sarah Winston Garage Sale Mystery series (starting with Tagged for Death) are quick reads I've enjoyed (at least the first 3) so far this year!

Angie ☯ wrote: "Abbey - You had two books with the Task as set in England. (Cloche and Dagger and Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)

We can each only use a task once, so I chan..."

My bad! Thanks for catching that and swapping one over! I was adding tasks for the books I didn't have one selected and definitely was not looking at my correct column for tasks that were already checked...oops :)

I also wasn't sure about Mainland Europe and British Isles and learned more about it after a google search too :)

Is there a better way to add the BOM response links after Day 1? I added Day 1 as a link in the correct cell, but couldn't link Day 2 in that same cell. I just added a column next to it for now for Day 2, just so I could add my link while I remembered, but I wasn't sure where to put other days of the BOM within the one spot placed in the original table.

Thanks!

Day 2 Questions

6 . 'I wonder how many strings she had to pull and how much money she had to throw away to get me into this trial'
This quote caught my attention because in the UK we don't have to pay for treatment, even in a clinical trial in the UK. Did it catch anyone else's notice?
This seemed normal to me, since in the US we pay for almost every aspect of medical care, even in a clinical trial. Some trials have monetary compensation (like for travel and lodging) but some do not. She could also be referring to the money to get her chart looked at and decided to be included, as there were likely many people who qualified for it and a limited number of spots. I'm not sure that that type of money (she seems to allude to bribery of sorts, I think) is even allowed or happening. But everything in the US in medical care is charged and costs money, regardless of insurance level, so it didn't catch my eye as much as someone who didn't have this type of healthcare.

7. Are you surprised at how quickly Stella has become attached to Will? I wasn't expecting this strength of reaction to him not taking his treatment seriously. Did you think it was in character?
I wasn't surprised, it seemed to fit fairly well in Stella's personality. She fights for control of the uncontrollable in her life, and the second some seriously uncontrolled person arrives nearby, I can see her wanting/needing to find control. This is initially just for her own peace of mind, not exactly for Will's own good, but the benefit is mutual in the end.

8. Wow Will's mum is controlling. I'm not surprised he's ended up rebelling from taking his treatments. Do you think you'd react like Stella (perfectionist, controlling about treatment and planning for the future) or Will (fed up, rebellious and living for the moment) to being in this type of situation?
I'd end up as a mix of Will and Stella. I have a different chronic illness and I definitely wax and wane in terms of being super organized and on top of meds and everything, and then getting tired of it all and letting more of it slip here and there. I've definitely never been as rebellious as Will, but I think there is a bit of Will in everyone with a chronic illness.

9. Masks, lots of hand washing, staying 6 feet (or roughly 2m) apart, limited places you can go… The recent pandemic is giving me more insight into some of what this must be like than I'd had before. How are you coping with the changes?
I've been fairly fine. Because of my medical history and the groups I work with (rare disease populations), I'm used to self-isolating and staying extra cautious during the winter months, so this just feels like an extension of that. Only difference is the whole world now knows what its like for many people who have to live like this during every regular cold/flu season. I've been working and finishing classes from home just fine. I head back to Grad School in August, with the hopes for a successful full semester back within the precautions.

Discussion Questions - Day 1

1) From what I know, this book is the novelization of the movie. While this doesn’t happen too often, I’ve read a couple books before that were only written after a movie/series (e.g. The Secret Diary of Lizzie Bennet). Have you ever read a book like this? What did you think? Was it successful? Did this experience influence your expectations of this book?
I know this book came out fairly ahead of the movie by a few months (if I remember correctly), and in reverse of your question, I thought this book gave me more insight into the movie than the movie gave me. I haven't read any others like the format you are describing (to my knowledge), so I really only have this book to base my thoughts on. So, this book heavily influenced my love of the movie and I think gave us a bit more of a character study into more characters and their family dynamics than the movie had time to accomplish.


2) Stella and Will, wearing face masks & using copious amounts of hand sanitizer before it was cool. All jokes aside, this is an oddly timely reminder that face masks do make a difference to prevent the spreading of diseases. I knew next to nothing about CF before starting this book and I’ve seen very mixed reactions to the representation of CF so I was wondering… do you have any experience with CF and therefore expectations? (If you don’t feel comfortable answering, feel free to just skip this question!)
I have a different chronic illness, but many in the chronic illness community I am a part of online have CF. I've heard fairly positive things from my friends with CF about the book and movie, especially in terms of how the actors looked, medical devices used etc. The book describes it all very well and accurately, but seeing it on screen is an impressive feat as well. Obviously, some aspects may be dramatized (it's a book/movie after all), but overall it was really cool to read about medical devices, long hospital stays, a girl trying to stay organized to take control of the uncontrollable etc. Those are all real things to many of us, regardless of what disease/chronic illness so seeing it mainstream and written down is very cool.


3) "If I’m going to die, I’d like to actually live first.“ This quote from Will’s POV reminded me of the countless bucket list stories and made me wonder whether this will go in that direction. Yet while Will takes more of a Devil-May-care attitude, Stella is very cautious to follow the rules. Do you think Will’s attitude is going to influence Stella as they got closer (literally?!). Will she also take more (dangerous) risks?
I think both of their ways of looking at a terminal illness, especially one you live with your entire childhood and beyond are valid expressions, albeit at opposite ends of the spectrum. There's no "right" way to think or view a chronic illness, but I can see both their extreme approaches maybe meeting in the middle? The dangerous attitude is always tempting for someone who is so rigid and controlled, but sometimes the dangerous attitude is just someone craving control. There are many facades one can put up to cover their innate fear of their disease or uncertain future, so I'm hoping with two extreme ends meeting they may both get to voice their true feelings and inner thoughts.


4) Stella is a "tech nerd", even programming her own app. Most MCs in YA books have artsy, "girly" hobbies (sorry for using that terrible gendered stereotype), if they have any prominent hobbies at all. Books about artsy people are among my favorites and I’m always on the hunt for more. While I like traditional hobbies, some of my favorite books (e.g. With the Fire on High) have non-mainstream hobbies and I am actually quite excited to learn more about this aspect of Stella’s story. Have you read any other books where the main character had a prominent hobby that wasn’t drawing/painting/writing/theater/an instrument?
I've read quite a few that have tech hobbies like Stella's, like coding/computer hacking, but it's usually in context of a sci-fi/YA book. I like books that feature artsy hobbies, likely because it allows me to see a world I am not a part of, but since I cannot relate to art in the slightest, I tend to veer towards books with technology or sports/athletics as the female MC hobby/plot.


5) Stella’s parents are recently divorced, in what she calls the “most ridiculous divorce of all time”, and she worries a lot about them. It both breaks my heart and confuses me slightly why it is so far being kept from us what happened - we only know that Stella believes both parents are unhappy after the separation. So… what do you think happened?

I've read the book when it first came out and now cannot even remember why, so I get to speculate all over again. I know statistically, many (I don't remember the real study numbers) parents of kids who are sick end up separating because of the strain either financially, or personally, especially having to split time at the hospital and home. I think there were other family issues going on in Stella's family that may have contributed, but I cannot for the life of me remember at this point.

Great questions - thanks for writing!

I'm definitely loving this challenge! Listened to my first "iffy" book yesterday, The Girl He Used to Know, which had my favorite male narrator, but I was already taking a risk with the description anyways lol. The ending was the best part (not because it was almost over, but because it took a surprising turn for a more contemporary fiction novel).

Anyone else come across some fairly average books in their reading either during the challenge or this year? I've only had a few this year, and only 1 or 2 DNFs but those borderline books are always so hard to decide if I should just stop and move on :)

Jenny wrote: "Woohoo! I was randomly picked to write DQs for the next BOM, Five Feet Apart. Points!!!!"

BOOYAH!!! I put my name in the running, but I'm so glad you got it for our team! I've never written DQs so it was a bit of a gamble putting my name, so I am a bit relieved to just see how it all works. The only other buddy read I've done fizzled out when I was the only one that ended up continuing the book lol, so I'm excited for this one. I love the story and it's accuracy of CF.

I have a different chronic illness, but know many people with CF who have loved the representation. If anyone likes this story, I highly recommend the Middle Grade novel Caleb and Kit that has a character with CF, but the story centers on a new friendship and risks taken in gaining independence.

Jenny wrote: "Is anyone reading for the BOM? If you are interested, it just started. The link is in one of the first messages in this thread. Remember we get extra points for ..."

I hope you like Echo! I've read parts of it when I volunteering a classroom at a Ronald McDonald House in undergrad, but didn't have my own copy to finish. So it's been on my list!

Pretty tame weekend for me! Finished two books and started the third. My oldest brother is in town for the week, so we've got my entire family together (during quarantine myself and my younger two siblings in college ended up all back home since March) and I've enjoyed some time out on our deck with my siblings this weekend.

We've had people cleaning our air ducts at my home for the past 5 hours, so my audiobook listening while I work from home as been low since it's so loud. Hoping for some quiet hours soon to listen again!

Hope everyone else is starting off their weeks with some good books!

Finished my first book today and starting another before bed!

Jenny wrote: "Ten tags per team per round.
I assume that the tasks list lasts (say that three times fast) for the whole challenge, so if you are marrying tasks to your books, try to get the harder ones out of t..."

I'm assuming that at the end of the 2 week period, the tasks attached to the books are "locked" in, correct? I know you can't "bank" books, but wasn't sure I read anything correctly on the tags, but assumed they stayed attach to the book submitted.

Thanks for answering questions so well, you guys rock!

Jenny wrote: "It's two weeks. Keep adding!"

I forgot it was two weeks (by that I mean I briefly forgot what a fortnight meant), and will likely end up with a few more that I may add on during the first week as it progresses. My monthly number may end up being a low estimate, since I averaged based on entire year so far, when I probably should have estimated my pandemic numbers only lol. Since being back at my parents house, I work with some data entry that allows a lot of audiobook time, so my numbers have increased a bit since March.

Here are some of my recommendations for my favorite books with accurate disability representation.

Sick Kids in Love

Blind

The Running Dream

Jenny wrote: "Fill them out wherever you want. We can move stuff around later if we need to. The goal is to fill out as many BACKPACKINGs as we can. We are only credited with one partial word at the end of the r..."

Cool, thank you! I'll start adding in the ones I have checked out/downloaded in other letter sets so I can determine which ones I have that don't work for anything, and get through them before the start. :)

When filling in further books after our one for the first word, should we stick to one book per set of "Backpacking" or whats the best way to go about that? I have a lot of books I know I'll get through, but want to make sure I'm adding them in correctly.

I added my first one and a second in the next section, but wasn't sure the best course from there. Once I know, I'll finish filling in what I can tomorrow based on what books I have checked out and planned. Thanks!

Jenny wrote: "I plan to read Five Feet Apart as well. The other one, probably not. I almost always read the BOMs during a challenge, but that one is very much not my cup of tea. I may change my mind."

The family-saga type story like in Jetsetters isn't usually my cup of tea either, but I try to work in a few a year to see if I eventually enjoy one, lol. Although, I just read some pretty bad reviews of the writing style of the book, so I may pass on it too.