s•u•n•s•h•i•n•e «§KENZ§»’s Comments (group member since Nov 04, 2013)

s•u•n•s•h•i•n•e «§KENZ§»’s comments from the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry group.

Antonio and Avi are both teachers, right...?

Sure thing!

Lol!!!

Partying! :/ Sort of. Haha, yeah... I am back, however. Please accept my most sincere apologies for my unannounced hiatus.

Sorry dears, what are you wanting me to put where?

Yes ma'am.

Wand Description:

"When Linnet, even at eleven exuding a haughty mien, entered the cramped, claustrophobic Ollivander's, it was clear to the wandmaker that this spoiled little girl's wand was to make profound revelations about her not even apparent to Linnet herself." | "even at eleven exuding a haughty mien" would best be set aside by dashes, rather than commas | "even ..." is used twice in this sentence | suggestion: '...about her not apparent to even Linnet herself.'

One more line after NAME!

Relations: Not everything should be italicized. (See the Profile.)

вełłαтяıχ wrote: "Name: Linnet Chryseis Stark

Position Applying For: Quidditch Commentator

Why?: Linnet is quite the chatterbox, and a reporter and gossip of the highest order. Although not inherently a pleasant p..."

Granted.

I love the picture! :D Um... If you could look over the profile (it was updated not too long ago), the tips I give in there should help you to catch the issues I see present in Georgia's profile. If that isn't much help, I can/will do a thorough critique.

Woolfie, who are Sam's friends?

All the colons are missing... :/

She looks pretty good! There are a few formatting things though.


For starters, REGINA should not be bolded, and there should be one more line between that and Name. (So two total.)

Granted.

I have some errands to do, but then I shall come respond in ze roleplay and keep it moving. Either by the end of today or tomorrow morning let's get everyone on the boats and carriages and off to Hogwarts. Give that a day, and then arrive at Hogwarts. Sound like a plan?

Oh-ho!

Who called Sam's name?? I don't know why, but it's killing me that I don't know!!!

Yay! About time! :D

[Enter Evander August from Carriage 2: Compartment E, message 19.]

Evander laughed and smiled warmly at the young staff member. "No kidding!" Jamie was cool, just like Alice. He couldn't imagine what it would be like to work at Hogwarts. Either way, he was excited to meet the Groundskeeper. However, it was time to go hop on a carriage, and he saw some of his friends waving. As the crowd of students started pushing against him and Alice, he shot a last look at Alice's smiling brother. "Sorry, Alice, but some of my friends are waiting for me. Thanks so much for riding with me! See you later!"