Marita’s Comments (group member since Oct 15, 2019)

Marita’s comments from the Beta Reading Group for Marita A. Hansen group.

Emma carruthers wrote: "Can’t wait how many chapters are in the book Marita ?"

Sorry, I thought I'd replied earlier but musn't have pressed post properly on my phone. Goodreads doesn't work that great on my phone, only my computer. Anyway, there are 8 chapters. I've just sent you chapter 4. Phew! I didn't think I was going to get it done today, got a bit busy with family stuff.

Sorry, I got a bit busy today so will have to send out chapter 4 tomorrow (it's 7:45pm in New Zealand right now).

carinne wrote: "Thanks!"

You're welcome :)

☺~Tina~☺ wrote: "Chapter 1 off to a good start. We will see how it goes but I wish Lucy would have just stayed with the original no to Riley."

She definitely should've said no :)

Emma carruthers wrote: "Sounds perfect have a good weekend"

Thanks, and likewise :)

Emma carruthers wrote: "Love the pictures"

Thanks! I still haven't found someone for Riley, though I found someone who would work for Zuko. If you happen to see any pictures that you think would suit a character, you can pop them up here too :)

This page is for Chapter 4, which is from Lucy's point of view. I'm having a little break over the weekend (still working on it, but not as much), so will probably send it on Monday (NZ time, so your Sunday). If I happen to finish it earlier, I'll let you know.

While this picture makes me think of Brooke.

Here's another picture of Barbie Ferriera that could work for Lucy, though Lucy's hair is crazier.

I'm kind of thinking that Lucy looks a bit like Barbie Ferreira (from EUPHORIA).

carinne wrote: "I like it, I just found it weird that Riley was poor. I don't know why it came across as unbelieveable. I guess I feel like she would have used that secret against him, and wouldnt have been so afr..."

I think Lucy's more afraid of Brooke than Riley, she just gets nervous around him because of her crush, while Devin and Zuko just annoy her. They also make her feel embarrassed and uncomfortable, especially Devin who's mean. Though, Brooke does use Riley's embarrassment about being poor against him. Brooke's more calculating than Lucy. Lucy is driven by her hormones, while Brooke is driven by her need to control everything and everyone. I hope Riley's chapter explains more (chapter 3).

Anyway, thanks, I appreciate your comments! I'll see if I can make that come across better.

I'll double check.

carinne wrote: "I dont think i receive chapter two."

I'll go send it to you now, along with Chapter 3.

Emma carruthers wrote: "Well Iv finished chapter 3 and I have to say I loved it from Riley’s point of view. Also a can’t remember if it said but had it told you what age they are yet ?? Totally hate Brooke, love Lucy and ..."

They're 18. I don't think I mention their age, just mentioned they're seniors and that Lucy started watching when she was a freshman, 4 years ago. Actually, I think one of the chapters, maybe chapter 3 mentions that Brooke is 18, when Riley talks about her not being a virgin.

Emma carruthers wrote: "Can’t wait see what he thinks of Lucy."

Cool! I've sent Chapter 3 to you.

Julieta wrote: "I read chapter one and two and I really like it!
I didn’t notice any mistake or something wrong \o/ green light for me. Waiting for the third chapter because that end was cliffhanger 😂"

Thanks, Julieta :) I'll be sending out Chapter 3 soon, just finishing things up.

This page is for Chapter 3 discussions. I will - hopefully - be sending it out tomorrow. It will be from Riley's point of view.

Emma carruthers wrote: "Perfect chapter loved it all. Loved that Lucy is shy but then when she gets a thought into her head she is strong and says it. Ps totally loved the top tight bottom on her skirt paragraph the fact ..."

Thanks, Emma :) I'm editing Riley's chapter right now :)

I will be sending this chapter out today.

Chapter 2's discussion page.