How can I manage to meet all of my children’s needs at once?
Continuing our guest post series, Elizabeth, whom you met in last week’s post, continued to fret over having enough time and emotional energy to meet the needs of a kindergartner, a two year old, and a newborn. Knowing that quality time is something that builds connection and trust, she was worried that the immediate demands of a newborn would make it difficult to spend uninterrupted time with her older daughters. Happily, she found reassurance in The “Perfect” Parent, specifically the portion entitled “Take Five”.
Take five minutes a day and dedicate it to nothing–literally, no-thing! Tell your child that you will be doing this every day with him or her. For five minutes, sit in your backyard, on your doorstep, by a potted plant on a windowsill–anyplace where you can see nature. Then relax and take your mind off of the rest of your day. This is your one-on-one time with your child, a time when you consciously put away your busy-ness. If you’re a pregnant parent, you, too, could (and should) spend five minutes a day with your hands on your tummy, taking deep breaths and just relaxing. If you have more than one child, then make it five minutes per day per child. Have no agenda on your mind, no topics to discuss. If you have something you want to talk about with your child, keep it for another time. This time is meant to be empty, filled only with no-thing.
If need be, tell your child that you’re going to hang out with him or her and just rest. Just sit with your child, put your arm around him, hold her hand, tell him you love him, or ask her how her day was. Do whatever comes naturally to you.
From Elizabeth: “Well, I can certainly find five minutes for each of my girls! And doing nothing with them will benefit me too–it is way too easy to get caught up in all the things that need to be done during the day and forget to simply be. The perfect time of the day for this will be different for each child, which is another way to make it special. Thanks again, Roma!”
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