I Didn't Fall! (But I Almost Fell. Right When I Got to the Podium. (Forward!))

The book signing went well! By the end of the hour it looked like a Derby Gang had shown up to be my bodyguards, and perhaps their intimidating size could be the reason the place sold out my books before everybody got a chance to get a copy. Note to writers: get a gang. When the pretty pants-less lady stares down your audience in a bookstore, it turns out they'll pretty much do anything for her.

In all honesty, as much as the pants-less lady did her job, I'm really grateful for all my...