Model Behavior
I'M WRAPPING UP MY final big investment. Going into it, I knew it would lose money, unleash unwanted disruption and chew up time when it’s never been more precious—and yet I still went ahead.
As readers might recall, last year, Elaine and I remodeled the kitchen in our Philadelphia home. This year, we decided we’d revamp the upstairs bathroom, despite my cancer diagnosis and the forecast that I might live just 12 more months.
To be strictly accurate, “we” didn’t decide. Rather, I decided, and Elaine reluctantly agreed. With so little time left, why would I take on a major remodeling project? There are four key reasons.
1. Easier for Elaine. Since my diagnosis, I’ve been in overdrive, trying to better organize my financial affairs. I’ve also done things that are a little out of character, such as replacing the hot water tank, even though it hadn’t yet died, and adding an air-filtration system to our heating and cooling equipment that Elaine wanted, even though the technology strikes me as unproven.
What drove these decisions? I found my answer in Dennis Friedman’s recent article. “Next on my list are replacing our home’s front windows,” Dennis wrote. “A new patio and brick wall are also on the horizon…. I want to make sure that life will be easier for my wife” after I’m gone.
Me too.
I knew Elaine wouldn’t undertake the bathroom remodeling once she was on her own. That made me more determined to go through with the project, in the hope it’ll make her life a little more comfortable after my death.
2. Addicted to progress. We humans are a restless lot—and, at least for me, that restlessness remains undiminished, despite my truncated life expectancy. Even now, I have a list of things I want to get done, and crossing off one or two of those items each day gives me a sense of purpose and satisfaction.
This extends to the current bathroom remodeling. I may not be doing the plumbing, tiling, electrical work and framing myself, and I know the boost to our home’s value will be far less than the sum we’re spending. Still, I love the feeling that, at the end of the project, our home will be even lovelier and that this improvement will be part of the world, even if I’m not.
3. Better together. Dying isn’t much fun. Along with the endless medical appointments, there are days when I don’t feel great, especially the period right after my every-three-week chemo and immunotherapy session. In recent months, the cancer has spread to my spine, so I’ve also been struggling with back pain and have had difficulty walking.
Can we change the subject to something cheerier? Enter the bathroom remodeling. It’s given Elaine and me a project to rally around. There are all the choices we’ve had to make—the tiles, fixtures, paint colors and so on. While the disruption hasn’t exactly been fun and it’s occasionally led to tension between us, I think overall the project has been a plus, giving us something to focus on other than my cancer.
4. Winding down. I may be addicted to progress, but I also know it’s time to stop adding to my to-do list and to cross off those items that remain. The bathroom remodeling is one of those items.
There’s a fistful of other items I also need to wrap up, including writing 10 final articles for HumbleDollar’s Saturday newsletter. Those 10 articles will carry the site through to March 1. Thereafter, Adam Grossman will be taking over the Saturday slot. I plan to keep writing for as long as I can. But it’s time to pass the baton.
Jonathan Clements is the founder and editor of HumbleDollar. Follow him on X @ClementsMoney and on Facebook, and check out his earlier articles.The post Model Behavior appeared first on HumbleDollar.
