644 Kindness or Control? | The Hidden Layers of Codependency

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“Let’s make the distinction: Feeling overly responsible for other people’s lives is not being nice. If you can’t not do it, then it’s a compulsion, not a choice. Being nice needs to be a choice.” – Terri Cole

Intro

Do you automatically accommodate others because it’s the “nice” thing to do?

Do you consistently overthink how your actions will impact others?

Are you always on the lookout for how you can help people or solve problems?

If you’ve ever wondered where the line is between codependent, caring, or controlling behavior, this episode is for you. 

I’m breaking down the distinction by discussing a little-known aspect of codependency, sharing real-life examples to clarify, and providing tips on how to shift from codependency to healthy giving.

Highlights:4:20 Defining codependency and recognizing when helping is over-giving8:30 The consequences of over-giving on our relationships16:30 How I realized I was still auto-accommodating17:50 What anticipatory planning looks like19:15 Ways to reduce your own over-giving codependent behaviorLinks Mentioned:

To hear my upcoming summit with 30 experts on real love, click here! terricole.com/summit

Visit  hfcbook.com to order my brand new book about breaking the cycle of high functioning codependency, Too Much.

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