Devalued Career to A Closeted Hobby
I always intended on my writing to lead to a career. I spent decades trying to get my writing noticed in magazines, writing contests, Wattpad, writing websites. It seems I've been tossed backward. Going back to square one again is not my idea of success. I've started writing for magazines again. I've entered a writing contest. I won't see the results of that until later this Autumn. I guess I'll be entering a few more of those writing contests. All of these have monetary prizes, including magazines which will pay for certain articles, short fiction, even novel length story submissions.
Of course, they have a specific word count, etc. I feel like I'm revisiting a flashback that I was hoping I wouldn't have to keep revisiting. Just goes to show you, you can be extremely talented and end up nowhere. I've been told by many strangers, readers, publishers I'm extremely talented. But it seems the reality is that's not always enough in this world. I don't know if I'll ever be able to get any of my other books out into the world.
Or if anyone will ever get a chance to see or experience the business ideas I have in store that are written down on my flash drive along with my books waiting to be read and devoured by a reader intrigued enough by them. It's like I'm dead and have left this world accomplishing nothing. Why have an innate talent that is worthless and leads you to the bottom of the pit?
I won't stop writing or writing my business ideas down. But I have finally decided to stop treading water and just let myself drown. I can't keep afloat any longer in this writing/publishing world. So I guess what I'm saying it's time for me to go into very early retirement.
Of course, they have a specific word count, etc. I feel like I'm revisiting a flashback that I was hoping I wouldn't have to keep revisiting. Just goes to show you, you can be extremely talented and end up nowhere. I've been told by many strangers, readers, publishers I'm extremely talented. But it seems the reality is that's not always enough in this world. I don't know if I'll ever be able to get any of my other books out into the world.
Or if anyone will ever get a chance to see or experience the business ideas I have in store that are written down on my flash drive along with my books waiting to be read and devoured by a reader intrigued enough by them. It's like I'm dead and have left this world accomplishing nothing. Why have an innate talent that is worthless and leads you to the bottom of the pit?
I won't stop writing or writing my business ideas down. But I have finally decided to stop treading water and just let myself drown. I can't keep afloat any longer in this writing/publishing world. So I guess what I'm saying it's time for me to go into very early retirement.
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Carole
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May 25, 2018 12:43PM
I hear you, Angel. It keeps getting harder and harder.
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This makes me sad, but it is a refrain I've head over and over again, here on Goodreads, and in my local community where people struggle to get their books read. Being an avid reader my whole life, it saddens me that we are finding so many other distractions instead of picking up a good book. I hope something appears to give you hope, Angel, in this discouraging world.
Carmel wrote: "This makes me sad, but it is a refrain I've head over and over again, here on Goodreads, and in my local community where people struggle to get their books read. Being an avid reader my whole life,..."Thank you, Carmel!
Carole wrote: "I hear you, Angel. It keeps getting harder and harder."Yes. It seems pointless all this pushing hard to get somewhere near to maybe success.
And it seems you continue to try different things, in the face of discouragement, so perhaps that will one day blossom into something that "gives back" to you! I do hope so.
Carmel wrote: "And it seems you continue to try different things, in the face of discouragement, so perhaps that will one day blossom into something that "gives back" to you! I do hope so."Thank you Carmel! I hope so, too. I wish you all the same.
If you love writing, and clearly you do, keep writing. Don't give up doing what gives you joy.
Pamela wrote: "If you love writing, and clearly you do, keep writing. Don't give up doing what gives you joy."I won't stop writing. I'm just retiring from being an author.
I wrote you a long comment the other night when I first read this post, and somehow I deleted it. I'm sure I won't remember now half of what I originally had to say.One thing I want to mention is that with all the changes in the publishing industry, many writers are becoming discouraged. I've pretty much accepted the fact that I'll never make a living from my work. I was never in it for the money to begin with, so that wasn't a huge jolt. But the fact that good writers for the most part can't support themselves with their writing saddens and angers me.
I couldn't ever not write. I tried it once during an abusive relationship (in which my spouse was jealous of my writing) but I couldn't sustain a non-writing life. For those of us with an innate talent for writing, it's in the blood. I will continue writing until I'm no longer able to. How great it would be to know I could share my words with the world and add to the wealth of fiction that has always been a rich source for sharing the magic and sorrow of living in an imperfect world.
I think your voice matters, and I think it's a shame that it probably won't be heard because of the reasons you state in this post. I wish things were different. I wish everyone under the sun wouldn't publish just because they can. That might sound harsh, but we are glutted with novels by people who never even thought to write until POD made publishing accessible to all.
Your distinctive writing deserves to be noticed. When I beta read for you I was struck by your unique writing style. You put everything into what you write and it comes through on every single page. I don't suppose there is any answer for the dilemma that you--and all of us writers--face. We can only continue writing because it gives us a peculiar kind of joy even when we're not being read. We can only continue planting seeds with our words because it's what we do.
Deb wrote: "I wrote you a long comment the other night when I first read this post, and somehow I deleted it. I'm sure I won't remember now half of what I originally had to say.One thing I want to mention is..."
Thank you for your poignant and eloquent words, Deb. I really appreciate you. You are the best beta I ever had. I won't stop writing as you said having an innate talent for it, "it's in the blood."
I just won't be publishing. I would love to be able to continue to do the publishing of my works but I see the writing on the wall. Maybe it was the wrong time to publish. I don't know if there will ever be the right time for my works to have value when published. So I have decided to retire from being a published author but not from writing, just the publishing aspect I'm done with. Maybe there will one day be a reason for me to come out of retirement as for right now there is not. I don't want my talent to be wasted. As of right now, it seems that it is.
My one solace is that maybe sometime in the future, even long after I'm gone, someone will stumble upon my writings and find something that helps them in some way.I've also learned to allow myself to enjoy the writing process itself. I find that within that process I learn so much about myself and about the world around me. Sometimes I'm not even sure what I think or feel about something until I've put it down into words.
We can hope the publishing world will change. I'm hoping so. I'm hoping the current craze for seeing one's name in print (when not accompanied with a writing talent) will begin to fizzle and clear the way for those of us born to write. And though it may be too much to hope for, still I hope that traditional publishers will go back to doing things the "old-fashioned" way when a writer was mostly free to write and didn't have to be both writer and salesman.
Sigh.
Angel, I am sat in the same boat alongside you. I've also been at this for a while-a couple of decades. That's most of my adult life. I have not made much of an impact. I am still paddling.
Current culture looks like one pyramid scheme, everyone from bottom to top building that pyramid; how they do it. Social science? Every ideal is thrown into play as weaponry against interlopers... the originals had creativity, but that produced market success which means they have lasting forms rife for use, by their spirit-opposites: all must love and most usually reflexively do.Or, former NewRepublic editor and younger alumnus Franklin Foer wrote 2 years ago, Amazon-Facebook-Google devalue the word from meaning to monetary value for writers. But give free access to all who will build pyramids, in goodies and praises, so "wtf" (Why The Face, then mr. troll?). World Without Mind was-is the book and lays out what looks like life-seeking of the intersection of good ideals and good social play, sold out in droves and among individuals to good ideals, the subset of nod-wink social climbing and goodies preservation.
My 2 favorite writers, slightly older college alumni I didn't get to meet, still writing; not big sellers (poets) but one, well-known, and the other struggled and had a long professional career but recently opened a remote cafe with his wife and publishes again.
The plus (good thing) of online instawriting is you edit the content, where magazines etc. will push-pull, add and delete words and ideas, change titles but leave your name Correct.
Wade wrote: "Current culture looks like one pyramid scheme, everyone from bottom to top building that pyramid; how they do it. Social science? Every ideal is thrown into play as weaponry against interlopers... ..."Thank you, Wade for your input. Maybe I will publish again. Maybe not. But right now that isn't what I'm going to do.
D.J. wrote: "Angel, I am sat in the same boat alongside you. I've also been at this for a while-a couple of decades. That's most of my adult life. I have not made much of an impact. I am still paddling."Thank you, D.J. I know I am not alone in this. But I think it's best for me to try other endeavors. It's been a long journey and its time to put myself to good use elsewhere. But I will continue to write. I still believe that you're on the right path and will make your impact sooner than you think. Just keep going.
Deb wrote: "My one solace is that maybe sometime in the future, even long after I'm gone, someone will stumble upon my writings and find something that helps them in some way.I've also learned to allow mysel..."
We can only wish, Deb.
Angel wrote: "Thank you, D.J. I know I am not alone in this. But I think it's best for me to try other endeavors. It's been a long journey and its time to put myself to good use elsewhere. But I will continue to write. I still believe that you're on the right path and will make your impact sooner than you think. Just keep going."Thanks Angel. I think the main thing is to enjoy what you write. I read things I've written and think, yes, I'd read that. It gives me a sense of achievement. I hope you get the same from your writing.
D.J. wrote: "Angel wrote: "Thank you, D.J. I know I am not alone in this. But I think it's best for me to try other endeavors. It's been a long journey and its time to put myself to good use elsewhere. But I wi..."Thank you.
The problem is that we have to be better at marketing than we are at writing and even then it's difficult to break through. It's a shame how many great writers will never get discovered because they're not good at working the system.
