Fat, I Have A Boner To Pick With You!

When I met my husband, I was at my ideal size and weight. I was watching what I ate, exercising, and drinking a shit ton of water. Then love stepped in and everything went to pot.

I have been with my husband for 4 years and married for three of them. I have watched he and I become very complacent and have not been eating as well or exercising regularly. I have watched my relatively flat stomach turn into a Southern sliding apron of epic proportion, seen new and not so improved extra crap on my back near and around my bra strap, and I hate the way the camera seems to put 200 extra pounds on me, or so it looks like to me.

Now, my husband says I’m am sexy as hell, my daughter says I should love myself at any weight because I rock, my son calls me hearty but says he digs me anyway, and I just plain call myself the product of love gone wrong.

I blogged a bit ago about walking to get in better shape but since I melted one day and feared that if I fell I’d get 87th-degree burns from the blacktop I was walking on, I had to put that one hold for fear of damn heat stroke and a trip to the burn unit to boot.

Recently, I finished a great book called ‘Love for Scale’ by Michaela Greene, which was about a girl who was overweight, still living with her parents in her mid 20’s, had no boyfriend or boyfriend perspectives, and was miserable. However, she decided to take control of her life by joining Weight Watchers, moving out, and then happens to meet an awesome dude at her Weight Watchers meetings. It was just a lovely book and to boot, it motivated me . . .

I joined Weight Watchers last week and I have to say, I feel better than I have in ages. My IBS hasn’t acted up and I’m shocked because I was convinced that if I ate fruit, it would terrorize me but its been just the opposite. I’m eating this wonderful veggie soup that is worth 0 points and is absolutely hands down the most delicious thing I have ever made. I have also re-joined the gym and I’m doing Pilates 2 days a week as well as using the gym on the other days. I feel more motivated than I have in a long time.

What I don’t get is, I was able to lose weight before on Atkins very easily and quickly but I’m here to tell you, Atkins ain’t cuttin’ it for this chick anymore and I guess age changes things on you but doesn’t let you in on the little secret til there’s a little extra of your person hanging off of ya.

I’m all about accepting yourself for who you are and as you are, I am, and if you or your man/woman likes you a little extra rolly, that’s great, but for me, I have this dress in my closet that I absolutely love and I have not been able to wear it since I started dating my husband. It pisses me the hell off that I can’t wear that dress but between that dress and the book I read that motivated me, I will wear that dress!

Now, I am not interested in getting into a bikini, although I wouldn’t turn my nose up to it if I was able to get that fit, I’d just like to feel comfortable on the beach or at the pool. If you know me, I don’t give a crap about what people think, but I do care what I think and I think it’s damn time to do something about my uncomfortableness that I try to shoo away but it ain’t going away. Plus, I have to stay healthy so I can see my job as a mother and wife all the way through. I have to take care of me!

For all of you out there that struggle with weight, I’m in the boat with you and it has taken me over 3 years to finally get motivated to do something about it. I’m not sure where motivation can come for some of you but that book I told you about was mine. I really should write the author a thank you note!

Love y’all!! ♥