Ashe Vernon's Blog, page 168
August 5, 2015
"TEXTS I (probably) WON’T EVER SEND:
I miss you.
God, I miss you.
Did you know you’re still my..."
TEXTS I (probably) WON’T EVER SEND:
I miss you.
God, I miss you.
Did you know you’re still my emergency contact? Sorry about that.
I can’t take it when you hold your mouth like that,
I want to devour you, I want to eat you alive
This is going to sound stupid
You know what, never mind.
Hey, I don’t want to get back together but if you
meet me halfway we can fuck in the back of your car.
How about we just both admit we aren’t sorry.
Hey. Thinking of you again. Sorry.
I mean it this time.
Okay, you know what fuck you. I mean,
FUCK you, but also–fuck you. Fuck.
That’s not what I mean.
I almost bought a plane ticket, today.
I was in love with you and I don’t think I ever mentioned.
I was in love with you and I might have mentioned
but you might have thought it was a joke and I just
want to make sure you know that it wasn’t and I
love you even though I’m not supposed to.
Hi.
Me again.
”- TEXTS I WON’T EVER SEND by Ashe Vernon (via latenightcornerstore)
August 3, 2015
In your opinion is suffering from guilt over minuscule things that sometimes I have nothing to do with, and that don't matter in the grand scheme of things a form of anxiety? I can't stop thinking about it, and my heart is racing, and I'm shaking, and I fe
Well, darling, I’m certainly not qualified to give a real opinion on this, but I will say that it sounds a lot like anxiety to me. I’d recommend seeing a professional and getting a proper diagnosis. You don’t have to suffer alone.
hello, do u have poems about unrequited love? thank you very much!!!
Honestly? Most of my poems about love are unrequited love. Just look through my “love” tag and you’ll find dozens of them.
is trusting people really difficult for you? how do i let people in?
Actually, trusting people comes very naturally for me. The thing is, I’m a very–I don’t know how to put this, uh–cynical trusting person? So, I TRUST people extremely easily, but I give that trust with the expectation that they will break it.
I like to think that it’s worth it–that the pros of trusting people outweigh the disappointment/hurt when I’m let down. I want to believe in the good in people.
It can be scary to trust someone when you know they’ll probably hurt you in the end. But trusting is such a delicate, tender, human thing. I wouldn’t want to let go of it.
So, I've been with this guy for 7 months and at the beginning, it was the best relationship. He made me feel so happy, like I was on top of the world and like he truly loved me. Now, things have gone down hill. I'm so insecure around him. He's always yelli
Baby, that sounds like it could be emotional abuse. What you’re describing sounds a lot like gaslighting.
Maybe the relationship used to be good, but it’s important to recognize that it isn’t anymore and you need to let go of it. A relationship shouldn’t bring more pain than joy. That’s literally the opposite of what it should be doing.
"It’s not like I’m the first person
who doesn’t take their own advice.
So when you..."
It’s not like I’m the first person
who doesn’t take their own advice.
So when you come to me
looking for the secrets to happiness,
I will pretend like I have them.
Conveniently, I will neglect to mention
my own clinical depression–that is,
unless it’s used to demonstrate
“overcoming hardship”
or some other self-help bullshit.
What I won’t admit to are
the three months where uncontrolled panic
made it impossible for me to leave the house or
how sometimes I still get anxious
being away from my apartment.
Listen,
I don’t know how to be happy
any better than you do.
But I’ll pretend–
because broken hearts are my favorite to kiss,
because I am desperate to be needed, because
I am disgusted with my own goddamn
Messiah complex but, god, you look at me
like I am something to believe in
and I’m weak for it.
The thing about being useful
and being loved
is I’ve never been able
to tell the difference.
It’s no wonder I got good at being used.
I’ve had a lot of practice.
And then I go and fall in love
with people who have no time for me.
I used to think it was a cosmic joke–
some terrible coincidence, but
I’m starting to wonder if a part of me
craves the non-attention.
If I only find myself worthy of love
when it comes in the shape of
unanswered phone calls.
After all, I have a pattern. And
I’ve dated people who loved me, but
I’ve never loved them in return. No,
that I save for the ones who lose interest, or
the ones too afraid of their own heart
to let themselves use it.
I don’t know how to walk away before
it gets hard.
I don’t understand this part of myself,
or why she won’t listen to the same advice
I’d give any friend:
You don’t deserve this.
Your heartbreak is a hand grenade;
you’re going to set it off again just
to spend months picking up
the aftermath.
It is time to bring this to an end.
Someday, I will love someone
who loves me back
and does it well,
and does it right.
And I will have to catch my breath,
because they will have knocked the wind
right out of me.
- LOVE, OR WHATEVER THE HELL YOU CALL IT by Ashe Vernon
My favorite tumblr poets
clementinevonradics
tristamateer
alonesomes
madgirlf
sweetestsecrets
creuxing
latenightcornerstore
andrewgibby
5000letters
FOLLOW THEM AND HAVE YOUR HEART BROKEN.
I hope you have a great day/week/month/year! You are a raft in the middle of the ocean for some of us and I can't begin to tell you how much I appreciate that. You have literally saved my life. But please don't forget to take your own advice and take some
Oh–oh my gosh, this knocked the wind out of me. Thank you. Thank you so much. This means so much to me.
