Shiloh Walker's Blog, page 156

okay, temporarily, my site looks weird

But my blog is back. And I'm off to find a bribe for my wunnerful weblady.

I broke my website… err, my blog

Apologies folks.  There are some technical difficulties going on.  The problem starts with the letter S… and ends with the letter H and there's an HILO in there, too.

I don't know why you can't see the blog normally, although you CAN see if I post individual links, I think.  My awesome weblady is working on fixing what I broke.  Me?  I'm going to go hide in the the corner.

 

A Forever Kind of Love…#7

ebook release April 2011

You can always come home.

Second chances come a little harder.

Chase and Zoe were the high school golden couple. Football captain, cheerleader, prom royalty.

After graduation, though, Chase couldn't resist the urge to experience life outside their small town. He didn't exactly expect Zoe to wait twelve years for him, but now that he's back, he finds some small part of him hoping she did.

It's no big surprise she's married. The kick in the face is she married his best friend.

Zoe was devastated when Chase left, but she's filed those bittersweet memories under "Moved On". She loves her life, and loves her husband. She has all she needs. And Chase keeps an honorable distance.

One cold, wet, miserable day, tragedy turns Zoe's world upside down. Chase never expected her to simply fall into his arms, but a man can dream. Except his dream doesn't include the fact that this time, she's the one hitting the road…and he's the one left behind.

Slamming on the brakes, he stared at her.

She didn't notice. She was staring straight ahead, so still, so motionless. She could have been a statue. Her hair was wet, hanging down her back in dark gold ropes, a few tendrils curling around her heart-shaped face. Her mouth was unsmiling, her eyes wide and unblinking.

His heart bumped against his ribcage and he pulled his car over to the side of the road and got out.

In the past few months, they'd bumped into each other a few times. Always casual, and every single time, Roger had been there.

Not once had he been alone with her.

Not once had he been with her without Roger's presence to serve as a buffer.

Chase couldn't have said if that was a good thing or bad thing.

Now, as he crouched down in front of her, he realized he felt about as nervous as he had the first time he'd asked her out. How many years ago? Eighteen years. Eighteen years ago now…they'd been together almost all through high school.

"Zoe?"

She blinked slowly and shifted her eyes to his face. A slow, polite smile tugged at her lips and she murmured, "Hello, Chase. How are you this evening?"

He peered up at the sky and then looked back at her. Rain clung to her lashes, dripped off her nose. She didn't seem to notice.

"Well, kind of wet." Very wet. The rain was already snaking down past his collar, inside his shirt to trickle down his spine, and it was so damn cold. "Zoe, what are you doing sitting out here? It's pouring out. Are you okay? Is…is your mom all right?"

He'd heard about her mother. Shit, that had to be hell. Zoe's relationship with her hadn't ever been easy, and now the woman was in a nursing home because she couldn't take care of herself anymore. Couldn't take care of herself, and there was no way she'd let Zoe do it, if even half of the stories he heard were true. She'd never been a pleasant woman, but lately, it was worse.

Zoe just stared at him. In the poor light, he could hardly make out her eyes, but he knew that soft, pale green better than he knew the color of his own eyes. They were too dark, the pupils large and dilated…shock, he realized.

Reaching out, he touched her hand. "Zoe?" he said quietly.

She blinked, a slow drift of her lashes over her eyes and then she looked down at his hand touching hers. When she looked up at him, there was some sense of awareness in her eyes, but only just. "Hello, Chase," she said, again.

Hello, Chase.

Like she had bumped into him on the street.

Not like he'd found her sitting in the middle of downpour, sitting alone in the square. Scowling, he closed his fingers around her wrist and tugged as he stood. "Come on, I'm taking you home."

He was half-prepared for her to argue.

There was a time when she would have.

But she followed along behind him, not saying a word.

He wasn't sure what bothered him more—her silence now, or the way he'd found her.

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Fear sucks

[image error]see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Fear sucks.  An uncontrollable, borderline irrational one?  That sucks even more.

Yeah, I know 'fear' isn't exactly something that's normally controlled, so to speak.  But I have control issues.  I was told the other day that maybe I should work on my 'control' issues..

I like being able to control things.  And I can't always. Like the fact that I'm having surgery again. Sure, yeah, I can say, NOPE. NOT DOING IT. But that would be stupid. Because then I'd continue to be in pain.  And I also have pain issues.  As in…I don't like it.

I'm not afraid of surgery.  Generally.  I seem to get sick or have an issue that requires it every couple of years.  I've got good doctors and if I didn't, well, I can recognize a bad doctor (thank God) and I'd find a better one very fast.

The problem isn't a life-threatening thing.  It's likely not even a serious thing, although I'm not going to say 'it's not major'-if you've ever had surgery, you know it's not pleasant, whether it's considered 'major' or 'minor'.  It's just necessary.  I'm pretty well-informed on the subject…I had to have a similar surgery last year, (third surgery in eight months, I'm so over this), I'm a nurse and hey, I can research like nothing else. Which may be part of the problem.  Even though I know…logically, as a nurse, as a clear-minded individual, it's not likely to be this, or that, or have that complication…well, I'm also cursed with that 'what if' thing.

What if it is serious, what if it's this, or that or…blah blah blah and all the freaking voices won't SHUT UP?

I don't know why, but I had myself seriously freaked out over this.  I spent two days last week all but catatonic, sitting in the living room, practically hiding, just like the kitty in the pic.  This isn't me.  I don't have a problem with being afraid, but I've never let it control me.  And for some reason, it was…

Then something** snapped me out of it.  I'd been letting myself slide into this funk and I had to stop it.  I can't control the physical problems I'm having and I was still fighting with the freaking fear that was trying to paralyze me, but I sure as hell wasn't going to let whatever this was keep me locked up and paralyzed.

I had to force myself to trudge through the night, doing what I'd been neglecting over the past few days.  Spent some serious time that night contemplating what I doing, spent some serious time praying…my faith is everything and maybe that's where I was messing up, forgetting that, because I was too busy giving into this fear.  And I still couldn't get why I was so scared.

I talked to my husband, and that night, I felt a little more peaceful.  A little better.  The next morning, I did a light workout, hurts too much to do anything more.  Then I went by my church. Don't worry…I'm not going to preach at anybody.  But it dawned on me that I'd spent the past few days all but mindless with fear, letting it control me-me, the control freak, and I wasn't talking to people.  Our preacher at church isn't just a good preacher-he's a good friend, too.  I left feeling better, more at peace-finally, thank God, this mind-numbing fear was gone and I could think again.  Could focus, could work.

More importantly, I could stop being a mindless blob who just sat on a chair, worrying and whining.  I felt like myself again. I tend to keep to myself and brood, and usually, that's okay, but this time, I let it take me over.

I think we do that sometimes…we let things take over and get huge, let them dominate and it takes the weirdest thing to catch out attention, make us realize what's happening.

**The something?  Baby bratlet.  She made a mess and for some reason, I was like…okay, I'm done…

Update on Pastor Marrion

For those who were following his story, I got this update today…

Hello friends,

I just want to share an amazing story and slideshow just posted on TIME's website about the plight of Pastor Marrion. It was written by my colleague and photogapher Marcus Bleasdale and includes eighteen stunning images that Pastor Marrion helped him produce over the past decade.

http://lightbox.time.com/2011/04/18/a-fixer-in-need/#1

I just spoke to pastor this morning and he seems well. The doctors are still waiting on results of one test before giving the green light for the transplant on Friday. This week we managed to raise enough for the transplant itself (THANK YOU!!!), but hope to raise more for the post-op care and any emergencies. This piece in TIME will certainly help.

I'll send you all an update after tomorrow's doctor's appointment with a more recent update.

Until then, be well. And thank you very much for your donations and help spreading the word. We're SO CLOSE to making this happen.

all best,

Bryan

You can read more about his story here.

A Forever Kind of Love…#6

ebook release April 2011

You can always come home.

Second chances come a little harder.

Chase and Zoe were the high school golden couple. Football captain, cheerleader, prom royalty.

After graduation, though, Chase couldn't resist the urge to experience life outside their small town. He didn't exactly expect Zoe to wait twelve years for him, but now that he's back, he finds some small part of him hoping she did.

It's no big surprise she's married. The kick in the face is she married his best friend.

Zoe was devastated when Chase left, but she's filed those bittersweet memories under "Moved On". She loves her life, and loves her husband. She has all she needs. And Chase keeps an honorable distance.

One cold, wet, miserable day, tragedy turns Zoe's world upside down. Chase never expected her to simply fall into his arms, but a man can dream. Except his dream doesn't include the fact that this time, she's the one hitting the road…and he's the one left behind.

>

Even if he wanted to snarl or break something every time he saw Zoe and Roger together, he couldn't leave just for that.

He hadn't come back just for Zoe. Even though part of him had hoped…

He'd come home because it was home.

Her being married—to his best fucking friend—didn't change that.

Get over it, he told himself. Just like he'd told himself a hundred times over the past few months. Easier said than done.

Easier said than done.

But he managed. So what if he hadn't gone out on a single date since he'd been here? It had only been six months.

It wasn't that he was obsessing over her…not exactly.

He was just not too interested in anybody else.

That was all.

He was busier than hell anyway. Trying to learn the ropes of being a business owner and running a bookstore. The only thing he'd previously known about bookstores was that he loved to read. On top of that, he had to bring it into a new century, keep it afloat during a struggling economy and it took plenty of time, plenty of energy.

When did he have time to think about dating?

He dumped the books in the back of his car, thinking they could wait a few minutes when he got home. The bottle of wine he had in the fridge was the first thing he'd open. Not a book, not the mail, not the bills, not something to eat.

The wine. Then maybe he'd start a fire. A nice way to end a rainy day.

The cold, wet drizzle had lasted throughout the day—it was great for bringing in customers, but now it was turning into a downpour. When he got home, he might call Tiffany and tell her she could close up if she wanted. This wasn't the sort of weather that would bring out the customers.

People wanted to spend nights like this inside, curled up with a good book, a movie, a lover…

Zoe…



Sometimes, he thought he was just used to looking for her…everywhere.

Maybe that was why he saw her so easily.

Sitting on a bench on the green, even thought the weather wasn't exactly ideal. Mid-forties and the rain was colder than ice.

Sitting there, staring at nothing.

Zoe.

Preorder

Kindle | Nook | Samhain

More on Mindmapping…

This one is for the computer. I like it. (click on it to see it larger)

VERY flexible.  Check it out here. As to how you would use for writing and stuff, that's up the writer…

Soldier saying thanks…

Back in February, Marjorie M. Liu and I both posted about a soldier who was needing some birthday cards…

Today, we both received an email from him.

Just wanted to email and thank you for the blog you had put up on your website with my address over here in afghanistan. I had over 100 cards in the mail for my birthday and i cant write everyone back to tell them thanks. if you can put on your blog that I GREATLY appreciate everything that I have gotten in the mail, cards, snacks, and whatever else. Thanks for the books that were signed and sent to me as well! I am very thankful for what everyone does for soldiers, especially not knowing someone! Thank you so very much!

A hundred cards, guys… readers rock.

Another EC book…

Doing some blasts-from-the-past excerpts on Saturdays for a bit.  Remember when I posted how EC had slashed prices on a whole bunch of books available through 3rd party vendors?  Figured that was a good time to post some excerpts from my older EC titles… so here's another.

Actually, here's my first…my first book pubbed with EC.  Which kinda started everything for me.

"You sure are pretty, Lauren," he said, grinning up at her. "If you don't mind my saying so."

"Thank you," she said politely, a smile tugging the corners of her mouth as she turned her head to look at him. "Of course, I realize your judgment is a tad bit impaired right now."

"Tad bit, my ass," he muttered, enjoying the sensation of the room spinning around. The only thing in focus was Lauren, with her watchful gray eyes and amused smile. Dale lowered his gaze to her mouth—that wide, lush mouth, curved up in amusement. Carefully, concentrating on each separate movement, he rose to his feet.

"Why don't I fix you something to eat and then clean up this mess?" she asked, sidestepping neatly when he reached for her, then positioning herself at his side as he tried to steady himself.

"Not hungry," he told her, a sweet smile on his face. He reached out, stroked his hand down the satiny skin of her cheek. "Soft," he murmured, turning his hand around and stroking his knuckles down her jaw to her neck.

"So are we friends again?" His gaze, bleary and bloodshot, wandered over her face. "You here to make me feel all better?"

"Yes. That's why I'm going to fix you something to eat so you don't wake up with a hangover the size of Kansas," she said steadily, even though her heart started tripping when his eyes started to linger, none too subtly, on her mouth.

"Don't wanna eat," he sulked, reaching up to touch his index finger to her bottom lip. "Not unless you're on the menu."

You can find the dropped prices at places like…

Kindle & Nook

The Friday 56

Winner of last week's #Fridayreads contest is…Ann G, email starting with JaneE2.  Ann, I need you to email Nicole at grimmhunter.shilohwalker@gmail.com!

So, remember this?

Some of you took guesses on what it was.

Wanna see what it is? It's below the cut…

It's a black and white clip of it, but it's the from the area down on the right corner. So technically, two people were pretty much right on the nose.  It's part of a cover. StacieDM and Book Vixen guessed it. Book Vixen was REALLY right-as in the cover  for one of the books in my RS trilogy.

As I said I'd make it worth your while if you took a guess…StacieDM and Book Vixen, you also need to email Nicole-the email is up top.  Send her your mailing addy.  You get a prize.

Now…onto to today's Friday 56~

Mine is actually from If You Hear Her

Pretty, quick, not quite so easily broken. Even after close to a week, she tried to fight.  Tried to struggle.  Even tried to run, and she ran well.

About the Friday 56

Grab the book nearest you. Right now
Turn to page 56.
Find the fifth sentence.
Post that sentence (plus one or two others if you like) along with these instructions on your blog or (if you do not have your own blog) in the comments section of this blog.
Post a link along with your post back to this blog.
Don't dig for your favorite book, the coolest, the most intellectual. Use the CLOSEST