Poppy Z. Brite's Blog, page 48
March 12, 2012
Tidings
My current eBay auctions end this evening, and the weekend brought a smallish but much-needed Exquisite Corpse royalty check. Maybe things are looking up a little. The Nutty Professor (the 1963 original) is my new favorite movie. Thank you, Ramsey!
March 9, 2012
Jerry Lewis Face
Or maybe Rowan Atkinson ...
I have come to the conclusion that life is better broke and hungry with someone who loves you and shows it every day than middle-class and luxuriously fed with someone who ignores you. A year ago I thought I could live with the latter, but no more.
Yesterday was my worst physical pain day in recent memory. I've given up tramadol; it helped quite a bit, but I'm tired of being dependent on it. Yesterday I couldn't always concentrate enough to read, and I was trying to make A Game of Thrones last until the other books come (not gonna happen), so I got a free Netflix trial membership and watched two old Jerry Lewis movies. One, The Sad Sack, was pretty funny and included a version of my favorite camouflage joke.* The other, Visit to A Small Planet, was one of the worst movies I've ever seen that wasn't on MST3K, but I watched it all the way through because I have decided I want to see all his movies. The ones I most want to see, The Nutty Professor and The King of Comedy (saw it years ago; thought it brilliant; want to re-watch), aren't available for instant streaming. There are people in my life who think a Jerry Lewis obsession at this point would be a very bad thing, and they are probably right, but I've never been able to help the shit I get obsessed with. So, for your edification and in thanks for your readerly kindness, here is my Jerry Lewis face.
*(Jerry plays a disaster-causing soldier.)
SECRETARY: He was transferred after he lost a tank.
GENERAL: Lost a tank???
SECRETARY: Yes. He was sent out to camouflage it one day, and, well ... we never found it.
I have come to the conclusion that life is better broke and hungry with someone who loves you and shows it every day than middle-class and luxuriously fed with someone who ignores you. A year ago I thought I could live with the latter, but no more.
Yesterday was my worst physical pain day in recent memory. I've given up tramadol; it helped quite a bit, but I'm tired of being dependent on it. Yesterday I couldn't always concentrate enough to read, and I was trying to make A Game of Thrones last until the other books come (not gonna happen), so I got a free Netflix trial membership and watched two old Jerry Lewis movies. One, The Sad Sack, was pretty funny and included a version of my favorite camouflage joke.* The other, Visit to A Small Planet, was one of the worst movies I've ever seen that wasn't on MST3K, but I watched it all the way through because I have decided I want to see all his movies. The ones I most want to see, The Nutty Professor and The King of Comedy (saw it years ago; thought it brilliant; want to re-watch), aren't available for instant streaming. There are people in my life who think a Jerry Lewis obsession at this point would be a very bad thing, and they are probably right, but I've never been able to help the shit I get obsessed with. So, for your edification and in thanks for your readerly kindness, here is my Jerry Lewis face.
*(Jerry plays a disaster-causing soldier.)
SECRETARY: He was transferred after he lost a tank.
GENERAL: Lost a tank???
SECRETARY: Yes. He was sent out to camouflage it one day, and, well ... we never found it.
March 8, 2012
Hello
I'm sitting here in a massive pain fog eating discount peanut butter on stale bread because that's all there is, but I'm still in a better mood than I was in that last post. Choosy mothers may choose Jif, but poor-ass motherfuckers choose the crappy store brand that's on sale at 2 jars for $5. Reading A Game of Thrones and have ordered the other books in the series except for the new hardcover. What did Erasmus say? "When I have a little money I buy books, and if there's any left over, I buy food"? And was it even Erasmus? I know nothing. (And in fact, when I have a little money, I buy cat food. And testosterone, which is so fucking pricey. Gotta get it again next week. Groan.) Have always liked George R.R. Martin (
![[info]](https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/hostedimages/1380923608i/3292608.gif)
grrm
), but never been a big fan of epic fantasy; however, I seem to be eating this up like a bag of Munchos. I've been needing something I could lose myself in.
grrm
), but never been a big fan of epic fantasy; however, I seem to be eating this up like a bag of Munchos. I've been needing something I could lose myself in.
March 6, 2012
Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack
It's nothing but peaks and valleys lately, and I could use more peaks. My beloved old cat Marcel died a week and a half ago and I just haven't had the heart to write about it. He was the brother of Rexina, who passed a few weeks ago at 16, and he was a true pillar of the household. Things seem wrong without him. And if I pay the bills, then I don't always know where my next meal is coming from. And this whole Saints "Bountygate" thing is breaking the collective heart of Who Dat Nation. And Chris doesn't want to move back home this month as I had hoped he might. There are good things too, most of which Grey is solely responsible for. My life right now would be hopeless without him.
Anyway. new eBay auctions are up: hardcovers of Drawing Blood, Antediluvian Tales, and The Value of X, and chapbooks The Seed of Lost Souls, Con Party at Hotel California, The Feast of St. Rosalie, The H.O.G. Syndrome, and Pansu. Please take a look if you can. Also, the response to the Big-Ass Mortgage Sale was amazing and I am getting those books shipped out as quickly as I can. I'm sorry for this litany of woe.
MARCEL
1996-2012
R.I.P.
Anyway. new eBay auctions are up: hardcovers of Drawing Blood, Antediluvian Tales, and The Value of X, and chapbooks The Seed of Lost Souls, Con Party at Hotel California, The Feast of St. Rosalie, The H.O.G. Syndrome, and Pansu. Please take a look if you can. Also, the response to the Big-Ass Mortgage Sale was amazing and I am getting those books shipped out as quickly as I can. I'm sorry for this litany of woe.
MARCEL
1996-2012
R.I.P.
March 2, 2012
Burning Questions
1. Why, when I stayed up until 3 AM last night, have I been awake since 6:45 this morning? Could it have to do with the fact that I saw Chris again yesterday and am now sort of re-convinced that he hates me? Or with having gone to the Walgreens at 1 AM, bought half a dozen Krispy Kremes, and devoured five of them (I can't even look at that last glazed)? Or both?
2. Why did I just spend an hour reading My Little Pony ableism drama when my only previous contact with MLP has been the successful hoodoo of weighing down a Rainbow Dash doll with a horseshoe and sinking it to the bottom of a big bowl of water labeled "Lake Pontchartrain," then sticking the whole mess in the freezer, on the day of Super Bowl XLIV (Saints vs. Colts)?
2. Why did I just spend an hour reading My Little Pony ableism drama when my only previous contact with MLP has been the successful hoodoo of weighing down a Rainbow Dash doll with a horseshoe and sinking it to the bottom of a big bowl of water labeled "Lake Pontchartrain," then sticking the whole mess in the freezer, on the day of Super Bowl XLIV (Saints vs. Colts)?
March 1, 2012
Bad T-Word
News flash: I do not like the word "tranny" (and that's the last time it will appear spelled out in this journal unless I'm talking about auto repair). I do not like it in the rain. I do not like it on a train. I just don't like it, Sam I am. I usually let it pass in online discourse since I'm not the language police, but I can't let it pass when someone close to me uses it, whether or not they're using it about me. (I've had the word thrown at me in a mean way a couple of times, and yeah, it hurt, but I think it's ultimately the prerogative of trans women to reclaim it or not, since they're the ones most often taunted and hurt by it.) So I thought we'd have a little etiquette lesson, not so different from my protips on what to do after misgendering a trans person, but slightly more complicated.
Last night my objection to "tr*nny" caused a bit of real-life strife with someone dear to me. This could have been avoided with these simple rules. (Remember, "cis" just means "not trans.")
1. Yes, some trans people like the word "tr*nny" and may even use it to refer to themselves. They have reclaimed it as other minority groups have reclaimed other slurs. The fact that you, a cis person, are friends with them/met them once/read their book/saw them use it on Twitter/etc. does not magically confer upon you the right to use it too.
2. Yes, some people use "tr*nny" to denote a transvestite or drag queen rather than a transgender person. That doesn't make the word any less painful to transgender people who dislike it. You, a cis person, don't get to decide what slurs against trans people do or don't mean. You especially should not try to explain to the trans person why "tr*nny" doesn't mean what they think it means and so they shouldn't be offended.
3. When a trans person calls you on using an offensive term, you should apologize and try not to use the term again, at least in that person's presence. You should not make the whole thing about your feelings. You should not make excuses about how you can't always remember these things (we know that, but we still appreciate you caring when you fuck up). You should not say "It's hard for me too." You should not try to get the trans person to comfort you because now you feel bad. Above all, THOU SHALT NOT SULK. (Sorry, didn't mean to slip into Old Testament mode, but I feel strongly about sulking.)
That is my lesson for today. Discuss as you like, but can we please not argue? I've had a rough 24 hours physically, mentally, emotionally, and probably a few other fronts I've forgotten, and I don't want to hear any hollering.
Last night my objection to "tr*nny" caused a bit of real-life strife with someone dear to me. This could have been avoided with these simple rules. (Remember, "cis" just means "not trans.")
1. Yes, some trans people like the word "tr*nny" and may even use it to refer to themselves. They have reclaimed it as other minority groups have reclaimed other slurs. The fact that you, a cis person, are friends with them/met them once/read their book/saw them use it on Twitter/etc. does not magically confer upon you the right to use it too.
2. Yes, some people use "tr*nny" to denote a transvestite or drag queen rather than a transgender person. That doesn't make the word any less painful to transgender people who dislike it. You, a cis person, don't get to decide what slurs against trans people do or don't mean. You especially should not try to explain to the trans person why "tr*nny" doesn't mean what they think it means and so they shouldn't be offended.
3. When a trans person calls you on using an offensive term, you should apologize and try not to use the term again, at least in that person's presence. You should not make the whole thing about your feelings. You should not make excuses about how you can't always remember these things (we know that, but we still appreciate you caring when you fuck up). You should not say "It's hard for me too." You should not try to get the trans person to comfort you because now you feel bad. Above all, THOU SHALT NOT SULK. (Sorry, didn't mean to slip into Old Testament mode, but I feel strongly about sulking.)
That is my lesson for today. Discuss as you like, but can we please not argue? I've had a rough 24 hours physically, mentally, emotionally, and probably a few other fronts I've forgotten, and I don't want to hear any hollering.
February 29, 2012
Wow!
Response to the Big-Ass Mortgage Sale has been awesome, thanks so much. One thing I should have requested last night: when you check out via Paypal, PLEASE include a note letting me know if/how you want your book's signature personalized!
WHOA ... while my legs are as hairy as most other guys', my arms still show only a discouragingly light layer of down. But while typing, I just noticed that I now have DARK KNUCKLE HAIRS!!! Only a few, but second puberty is teaching me that where there are a few, there will soon be more.
WHOA ... while my legs are as hairy as most other guys', my arms still show only a discouragingly light layer of down. But while typing, I just noticed that I now have DARK KNUCKLE HAIRS!!! Only a few, but second puberty is teaching me that where there are a few, there will soon be more.
Mortgage Sale
In addition to my regular eBay auctions, I've got a Big-Ass Mortgage Sale going on: signed/personalized paperbacks of Drawing Blood for $12 and hardcovers of Guilty But Insane for $20. Both prices include U.S. Media Rate shipping. Worldwide air mail also available. Wuxtry! Wuxtry! Get 'em while they last!
A Matter of Trust
Now this is the way things should always be. I'm ensconced in my (fairly) neat and clean house with nothing that really needs doing and a book I've been wanting to read*. I just had a good dinner with my mom. I miss Grey only in a pleasant, anticipatory way, knowing he is right across town in his own lovely space doing his own work (currently, processing thousands of gay Mardi Gras ball photographs) and we will be together again soon.
In general, though talking to Chris yesterday wasn't easy, I feel better since than I have in weeks. We've been texting too, which is currently my favorite way to communicate. It's like the person I once trusted most had become this boogeyman in my head, but when I saw him yesterday, he was just my old compadre. I may not like everything he's doing, but he's still himself and I still love him.
Question for anyone, and especially poly people: What do you make of the difference (if any) between loving someone and being in love with them?
*The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. PLEASE DON'T TELL ME ANYTHING ABOUT IT IN COMMENTS.
In general, though talking to Chris yesterday wasn't easy, I feel better since than I have in weeks. We've been texting too, which is currently my favorite way to communicate. It's like the person I once trusted most had become this boogeyman in my head, but when I saw him yesterday, he was just my old compadre. I may not like everything he's doing, but he's still himself and I still love him.
Question for anyone, and especially poly people: What do you make of the difference (if any) between loving someone and being in love with them?
*The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. PLEASE DON'T TELL ME ANYTHING ABOUT IT IN COMMENTS.
February 28, 2012
May I Call You Pigfucker?
I finally realized who Rick "Mr. Frothy" Santorum reminds me of a little:
No offense to the fine comic actor Dian Bachar, but those familiar with his characters in Cannibal! The Musical and BASEketball may obtain some lulz.
No offense to the fine comic actor Dian Bachar, but those familiar with his characters in Cannibal! The Musical and BASEketball may obtain some lulz.
