Shannon Ables's Blog, page 305

Au Courant Weekly: January 10, 2016

—The Simple Sophisticate, episode #78

International

—On Wednesday morning, South Korea reported a detection of seismic activity, measuring a 4.8 earthquake provoked by what North Korea claims to have been a successful test of a hydrogen bomb in the upper northeastern region of the country. Unilaterally condemned by the international community, including China, critics and experts looking at initial reports have revealed North Korea’s claims are unfounded. However, since they may have detonated an atomic bomb, this news reveals that they continue to make nuclear advancements.

—Earlier this week 30 men were arrested in Germany after being suspected of being part of the New Year’s Eve sexual assaults on women in the city of Cologne. Twenty-two of the men are believed to be asylum seekers fueling riots and protest in the city on Saturday as a pushback to Chancellor Merkel’s refugee policies. With a reported 1.1 million seeking asylum having entered Germany last year, primarily from the middle east, Africa and Afghanistan, right-wing groups made it clear they would protest. The New Years Eve incidents prompted more than 170 complaints, primarily for sexual assault, and with the initial response by Cologne police being unacceptable, the chief of police has since been removed from his post.

National: United States

—In southeastern Oregon, Ammon Bundy from Nevada along with an estimated 20 others have broken in and taken command of the Mahleur County Wildlife Refuge. Located approximately 30 miles from Burns, Oregon, the group of militants calling themselves the Citizens for Constitutional Freedom have repeated their demand of being in opposition with federal land-use policies. Commandeering the facility on Saturday, the local sheriff met on Thursday with Bundy offering a safe and peaceful escort off the property. The offer was declined. While many citizens of Burns and the surrounding area have voiced understanding and the plight of the militia, they have repeatedly stated they do not agree with the means or tactics which the group has employed.

Politics

—President Obama issued executive orders on Tuesday after hearing recommendations from the Director of the FBI, James Comey, and Attorney General Loretta Lynch. Focusing on reducing the loopholes and flaws when it comes to background checks, online gun dealers will now have to be licensed and do a background check with every purchase. As well, as pertaining to a current federal law, the privacy limitations of sales to those identified with mental illnesses will be made more readily available to those conducting background checks. As well more funding was requested to hire 200 ATF (alcohol tobacco firearms) agents and 230 more FBI agents to help process more efficiently the background checks. On Thursday, President Obama held a town hall hosted by CNN and moderated Anderson Cooper at George Mason University in Fairfax, Virginia. The event focused on “Guns in America” and included advocates from both sides of the issue. The conversations and exchanges are worth having a listen to.

—For the eighth time in President Obama’s presidency he has used his veto pen. On Friday, for the first time, after more than 50 attempts by Republicans and the House of Representative to repeal Obama’s signature healthcare law, the bill, having cleared the Senate in late December (52-47) and the House (240-180) with only four members crossing party lines on Wednesday, was repealed by President Obama. Not having enough votes to override the veto, the bill would have also defunded Planned Parenthood.

Health & Science

—Britain’s government’s chiefs of health released for the first time in 20 years startling warnings about drinking too much alcohol as it relates to cancer. Even warning against the glass of wine a day and suggesting a glass of tea instead, the chief medical officer Sally Davies appears to have put her foot down on drinking too much. As reported by The New York Times, “the new health guidelines say that to reduce health risks, men and women should not drink more than 14 units of alcohol in a week, roughly the equivalent of seven glasses of wine, six pints of beer, or half a bottle of whiskey.”

—A simple way to eat better in the new year, place a mirror at the table. A study by the University of Central Florida revealed that when we observe ourselves eating something we define as unhealthy, the tastiness of the item decreases, and we eat less. Published in the Journal of the Association of Consumer Research, watching ourselves eat cake diminished the satisfaction and “enhanced the discomfort of the failure.”

—On Tuesday, Federal regulators with the Federal Trade Commission fined the brain training app Lumosity $50 million. While a deal was struck for $2 million, should Lumos Labs break the agreement, the original fine would be enforced. Having claimed to have a program that had “the ‘proven’ ability to enhance brain function, ward off degenerative brain diseases, and improve academic and athletic performance”, the FTC backed by multiple brain studies from highly respected institutions such as Stanford were able to find no evidence to back up their claims. Accusing Lumosity of preying on the fears about age-related cognitive decline, the FTC is requiring Lumosity to refund its more than 70 million customers from 182 different countries.

—U.S. Federal Dietary guidelines were released on Thursday as they are every five years, and the word is sugar needs to be reduced and while red meat does too, due to the negative effect it may have on the farming industry in the states, it received a kinder reduction in dietary recommendations. With a wealth of research demonstrating that high levels of sugar consumption increase the risk of Type 2 Diabetes and heart disease even in people who are not overweight, the recommendation is to limit sugar to no more than 10% of one’s daily caloric intake (based on a 2000 calorie a day diet). On the red meat and processed meats front, the suggestion is to turn to other sources of protein such as more nuts and seeds and at least 8 ounces of seafood a week.

Arts & Entertainment

~The 73rd Golden Globes hosted by Ricky Gervais will take place today on NBC at the Beverly Hills Hilton in Beverly Hills, California.  Yes, this is the one were the stars seem to be enjoying themselves a bit more and both television and film are honored. For a complete lists of the nominees, click here. The show begins at 8pm (EST) and 5pm Pacific. If you are someone who enjoys the red carpet arrivals, be sure to set your DVRs for 6pm/3pm.

Bendite Event of the Week
— 5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche

Opening January 15th and running through the 24th, Samuel French’s 5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche is set in 1956 in a community center basement. The annual meeting of  Susan B. Anthony Society for the Sisters of Gertrude Stein has gathered for their annual quiche breakfast, but when Communists threaten to disrupt their idyllic town, the women struggle to keep their cool. Tickets for adults are $19 and students and seniors $16 at the Second Street Theater.

French Word of the Week

galette

~brought to you by Geraldine of Comme Une Française

~This & That: No. 191

Thought to Ponder

 

~AU COURANT episodes from the Archives:

~January 3, 2016

~August 22, 2015

~August 29, 2015

~What is Au Courant all about? Find out HERE.

 

 

Source: image

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This & That: No. 191

Blog
—HBFit 

Health, Beauty and Fitness. To balance all three to provide a wealthy foundation from which to spring forward into pursuing and accomplishing your dreams. Founder Hannah Bronfman has created a worthwhile destination that offers posts of ideas and inspiration to cultivate the balance that will help your reach your full potential.

Books
—Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-Being by Martin E. P. Seligman

The concept of positive psychology has captured my attention lately, and while Dr. Seligman’s book Flourish has been available for more than a couple of years, it is one I am eager to read. Discussing the concept of well-being and defining precisely what it is, Seligman speaks to the ideas of optimism, motivation and character to help each of us enjoy a more fulfilling life.

—Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges by Amy Cuddy

I will admit, I first learned of power poses after watching an episode of Grey’s Anatomy last year. Needless to say, my interest was piqued. Social psychologist Amy Cuddy’s TED talk “Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are” has been viewed more than 30 million times, and now, she has a book available to dive even deeper into the life changing behavior that has captivated the world. Presence was just released this past month and shares how to shift away from worrying about the impression we are making on others and instead adjust the impression we are making on ourselves. This book is on my night stand and I ready to dive in. I’ll be sure to report back.

Learning
~ Duolingo

This past week on Instagram I shared that I was beginning French classes at the local community college here in Bend to brush up on my must-ended French-speaking abilities (it’s long overdue).  And immediately, so many of you responded with your own experience and language tools. I must give a quick shout-out to Andrea who introduced me to Duolingo, an online site and free app of which I am not completed intrigued by. In fact, while writing this post, I visited the site, and spent fifteen minutes completing a few refresher French lessons (for free!). I have now downloaded the app and look forward to keeping my French fresh in my mind. I highly recommend for any language you are interested in.

—Pimsleur

Many have most likely heard of Rosetta Stone, the language program to help you learn any language quickly, efficiently and accurately. In 2012 I shared a post about the benefits of learning a foreign language, and I continue to be passionate about this pursuit. Since that time, and having had a positive experience with Rosetta Stone, I have come across Pimsleur. An effective language learning tool available in MP3 and CD versions, integrating memory, organic learning, principle of anticipation and core vocabulary. For a similar price to other programs, a long list of different languages are available and you come become fluent in the comfort of your own home, car or out and about on your daily walk.

Shopping
—Karl Lagerfeld leather shoulder bag

Reduced 55%, Karl Lagerfeld’s classic shoulder strap leather handbag is a staple to accessory nearly any everyday outfit.

—Tomas Maier funnel-neck stretch jersey midi dress

Midi lengths have been catching my attention for a while, as they allow the silhouette of the body to be elongated and provide a bit of extra warmth as well in the winter. The unique signature neckline and classic black style offers a dress to be worn for a variety of day or evening occasions, all the while keeping it classic, chic and understated.

~recipe for the Magic Chocolate Cake~

Welcome to 2016! With the first This & That of the new year, let me welcome you to what has been a busy and inspired last three weeks here on TSLL blog and podcast. From the anticipated release of TSLL Planner templates (check out the new page design) to the return of Au Courant Weekly on The Simple Sophisticate podcast each Sunday morning, and last, but not least the new three part series that just launched yesterday: How to Create a Blog You Love.

Without a doubt, I am eager to aspire to the image above this weekend, sit down, relax and sip a cup of something delicious, but I must say, I am having a hard time doing so because I am thoroughly excited about all that is going on here on the blog. More than a 1000 readers ordered their preferred TSLL planner template in the first week, and after working out a few kinks (the downloaded links had a default setting to have the links expire after 24 hours, yikes!), we are now all set. Needless to say, if you are at all interested in creating your own planner for the new year, complete with the Inslee illustrations only found here on TSLL, be sure to check out TSLL Planner online shop. And if you have already purchased, printed and put together your planner, be sure to share a pic of it on Instagram with the hashtag #tsllplanner (view my pics here).

Before I go, I want to send a tremendous thank you to Erika of The Farm on the Hill blog for including TSLL book Choosing The Simply Luxurious Life: A Modern Woman’s Guide in her Essential Reading List for a Simple 2016. I too have a pile of books I am beginning to read and thoroughly enjoy as a way to start off the new year in a manner that is inspired and offers wisdom for personal growth. Speaking of which, the first Monday episode of The Simple Sophisticate was all about trust. If you haven’t tuned in, be sure to check it out as it is a rich resource for cultivate a skill that, while taking practice, has the potential to be a life and relationship changer, beginning with ourselves. But now, the weekend and a few links I think you might enjoy. Until Sunday morning, bonne journée!

~How to Cultivate the Art of Serendipity

~10 Changes to Make in Your 30s That Will Set You Up for Lifelong Success

~40 Things to Do Before You Turn 40

~5 Simple Steps for Lasting Love in 2016

~18 Ways to Create Good Habits – And Eliminate Bad Ones – For Life

Images: (2)

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How to Create a Blog You Love, Part Une

In 1994 Justin Hall, Jerry Pournelle, and Dave Winer began doing something that hundreds of millions are doing today. Blogging. Credited by many for being the first webloggers to begin what is now a full time job for many, blogging can be done in a myriad of ways for a variety of reasons.

In 2009, it was estimated that 200 million blogs were in existence. A rough estimate in 2014 put the blog tally at 420 million, but one of the largest blogging platforms, Blogger, doesn’t report their analytics, so again, a rough estimate. Either way, blogging has and is an existing medium that continues to offer individuals an avenue for self-expression, a means to promote their business (traditional book authors are all but required by their publishers to have a blog associated with their online web presence) and any other opportunity to put your voice out into the world without having to spend much, if not any money

Many TSLL readers have asked over the years for me to share in more detail how my lifestyle blog The Simply Luxurious Life began and how it became the blog that it is today read by hundreds of thousands each month from around the globe. Let me first begin by saying, I had no intention or foggiest idea that the outcome you see today could be a possibility. The key, as I share in the first chapter of my book is to love writing and have a sincere relentless, unwavering passion for the content you are sharing. If your goal is to blog as a career, I cannot promise that. No one can promise that. There is a magic mix of persistent, stubborn hard work, timing and risk taking as you are willing to invest.

But before I dive more deeply into the nuts and bolts, what I’ve created today is the first in a three part series of how to create a blog you love. As the title for today’s post I almost put “How to Create a Successful Blog”, and while I could have because if you love what you do, you are successful, sometimes the term “success” can be misconstrued. I believe, and if my blog is evidence to the fact, that if you love something, you already are successful, and if people gravitate toward what you have to offer, all the better. But I can sincerely say, I would write each day for free. Okay, maybe a monthly earnings enough for regular cups of my favorite Parisian tea, but still, truly, I love what I do, I am thankful I have the platform to express myself and am fortunate to work with talented people who have helped put my vision out into the world in a medium that I am proud to call my blog. So the title How to Create a Blog You Love was solidified.

Building the Foundation

Much like building a house, surrounding yourself with quality relationships, the details matter and this takes time and perhaps some investing on your part. So let’s break it down.

1. Select the best platform

There are a handful of free blogging platforms for anyone who is just beginning or knows for certain their blog will be solely a personal hobby or pursuit. Blogger, WordPress.com (not WordPress.org) and Tumblr. TSLL blog began on Blogger for the two reasons mentioned above. But as you will see from this detailed post by StartABlog123, if you want more than a personal outlet, you will want to consider other platform options. I stayed with Blogger for three years before I finally migrated to WordPress.org (not to be confused with WordPress.com – free).

If your goal is to sell services, monetize in a way that is efficient and uncluttered, you will want to pay for hosting (we will talk about that in a minute) and select a platform that allows you to have complete control over your blog. The options available for hosting are WordPress.org (1 out of 6 blogs are WordPress), SquareSpace, Ghost, Moveable Type & Expression Engine (learn more about each of these here). There are other options, but these are the most recommended (some have been around much longer than others, but the last three mentioned may suit what you’re looking for).

As I mentioned above, I migrated to WordPress.org without hesitation and have never regretted the move in the least. I have complete control of design, layout, content and while I do pay a hosting fee each month, I write it off on my taxes and continue to create the blog that I have envisioned in my mind when it comes to helping readers live simply luxuriously.

And I must give a shout-out and high recommendation to Joy Miller of Five J’s Design for migrating my blog from Blogger to WordPress. I do not suggest doing this by yourself unless you are skilled in coding. For a few hundred dollars and in fewer than a couple of days, my blog and all of my archived content was on my WordPress site.

2. Buy your domain

The cheapest and simplest thing you can do to brand your blog is to buy your domain name. No more thesimplyluxuriouslife.blogspot.com or thesimplyluxuriouslife.wordpress.com (free hosting sites). Even if your blog is a hobby, for few than $15 a year you can reserve your domain name from a variety of sites (GoDaddy,  and many others). There are many unique domains beyond .com. For example, if you visit www.habituallychic.luxury, a few years ago she selected to change her domain name to fit her blog’s premise (luxury). Often these cost more, but again, nominal compared to other yearly costs. The key is something readers will remember, limit the extra punctuation marks and then lock it in. I also reserved my name shannonables.com because I thought one day I would have an author’s page. And thankfully I did because I do have an all things simply luxurious living at shannonables.com.

When it comes to renewal each year, I have put mine on automatic renewal to ensure my domains remain in my possession. Even when you choose this option, they will send a one month, two week, one week and day of reminder to let you know that the renewal is taking place (which you can change at anytime).

Note: Before you select the name of your blog, view part two next week when I share my thoughts on what the focus of your blog should be, your niche. This will save you unnecessary changes in the future to your domain and help keep the consistency which is crucial for continued success and growth when it comes to your readership.

3. Hosting

If you know or have an idea that you might want your blog to become a business, you will have chosen a self-hosted blog. There are many different hosting services, and having explored the internet for the best one, there is no conclusive answer. I work with both Host Gator and BlueHost. The monthly cost will depend on what you need based on the reach of your blog (page views, hits, etc). I have had to increase mine over the years as the audience as grown, but when you are just getting started, it can be as minimal as $15 a month. Another helpful tip to know is that technicians are available nearly 24/7 if for some reason you have questions, your website goes down, etc. This very rarely happens, but sometimes there will be a database error and nothing will be seen. Typically, it is not just your website and you personally have done nothing wrong. Simply call them up and in minutes they will have it up and running. Over the past year, I think I have had this happen twice for a few short minutes once I recognized what was going on.

4. The design

The best part of creating a blog is designing it as you have dreamed about in your mind. TSLL has undergone a couple of changes, but the best decision I made was to hire a web designer. I cannot recommend more highly Shari Miller of Little Blue Deer Designs. She is still my designer and is highly sought after by the fashion, food and lifestyle blogging community because she offers tremendous service at an affordable price. For Oregonians, and for anyone for that matter, I worked with Jack Wheeler of Blue Hat Designs from Eugene for my author website, shannonables.com, and am very pleased with his eye and talent. He is a bit more in cost, but well below the high-end designers you will find. I would return to him in an instant as well.

Expect to pay between $200 to $500 (low end) for basic WordPress or Blogger designs. I have spoken to many other designers, some who have laid out Vogue‘s website and other high-traffic sites and they can run you into the couple of thousands of dollars on the low end. Truly, $500 is a steal in this world as they are in high-demand and they know the market. Another skill or language for us all to become fluent in if nothing else to save ourselves money.

5. Optional: Select an illustrator

Hands down, the best decision I didn’t know I was making at the time, was to reach out to an illustrator that I was inspired by and paid for a commissioned illustration. Why? Your design will be completely unique and entirely yours to copyright or use in any business fashion you choose. Inslee Fariss, as you see on the blog, on the cover of and inside the book as well as the image for the podcast, speaks my language when it comes to blending style with elegant simplicity. I thank my lucky stars I had the courage to reach out to her when I did back in 2011. And while Inslee is highly sough after today (Rachel Zoe and Elizabeth Arden have commissioned her talent), there are many talented artists out there. Perhaps you have a friend or a family member. The key is to pay for the commission and sign a contract that gives you complete control of the image once it is complete.

Okay, now that the foundation is laid, let the writing and creating begin! Stop by next week for Part Two when we talk about how to select your content, focus, and how to create posts that are attractive as well as engaging.

 

Image: (1)

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Decor Inspiration: Creative Cozy

The West Hollywood bungalow of actress Nina Dobrev infuses modern touches by from Kelly Wearstler along with a cozy welcoming cottage vibe. From the beckoning kitchen nook above to the geometry black and white kitchen backsplash, unexpected touches of a signature style abound. Enjoy the tour.

~DECOR INSPIRATION posts from the Archives:

~Cottage Cozy

~Function & Beauty

~Comfort & Conversation

Images: MyDomaine

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Word of the Week: No. 32

~Click below for pronunciation:

 

~WORDS of the WEEK from the Archives:

~No.31: annus mirabilis

~No. 30: doyenne

~No. 15: modicum

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Outfit of the Week: Black Sophisticate

~Theory Ramalla Modern GGT~

~M Missoni twill slim-leg pants~

~J.Crew Elsie suede d’Orsay pumps~

~Rebecca Minkoff Finn Crossbody handbag~

~Taylor Kinney Tektite Double Strand necklace~

SHOP THE OUTFIT:

Turn on your JavaScript to view content

~OUTFITS OF THE WEEK from the Archives:

~Wild Attire~

~Chilly Chic~

~A Touch of Order~

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Style Inspiration: Back to Simple

Simple style, simple choices, simply perfect. With fewer choices and confidence that each item is quality and superbly designed for your physique, stepping into the closet can feel much like a holiday. And if your closet doesn’t quite feel as though it were a euphoric destination, it certain can become that in time. Shop wisely, invest as necessary and eliminate the unnecessary. Enjoy gathering a bit of style inspiration for the selection in today’s post.

~STYLE INSPIRATION posts from the Archives:

~Ageless Style

~Simple & Signature

~Simple Chic

Images:(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11)

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Found: The Missing Piece

“Trust is choosing to risk making something you value vulnerable to another person’s actions.” Meanwhile, distrust is deciding that “what is important to me is not safe with this person in this situation (or any situation).” —Charles Feltman, author of The Thin Book of Trust

~The Simple Sophisticate, episode #77

It is estimated that 50% of us made resolutions as we rang in 2016 just a few days ago. And while I am always on the boat of making and setting goals whether it’s January 1st or September 1st, study after study reveals that one of the many things successful, happy, content people have in common is that they set goals. Clear goals. Concrete goals, also known as SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Time-bound).

And while I won’t be offering a concrete goal that you may select today, I will be sharing with you a goal that I have never placed on my resolutions or goals list because I didn’t know how to accomplish it, until now.

Cultivating trust.

As much as we can blame the outside world for some of the frustrations and headaches in our lives, we also must take responsibility for how we create frustrations and headaches for ourselves. Part of it is ignorance, the other part is obdurateness, the thinking that in no way could we be at fault, and it must be something else. The beautiful realization is that often what needs to be fixed after we’ve changed everything on the outside that can be changed, is our cognitive response.

Statistically, each and every one of us has endured a loss of trust either in our personal or professional lives. But what does losing trust look like? When we say we don’t trust someone or something, what are we really saying?

Whether information crosses our paths when we are looking for it or when we need it, I don’t know for sure, but I do know that Brené Brown’s video for Oprah’s Super Soul Sessions on The Anatomy of Trust, stopped me cold.

I had initially planned to write an entirely different post for today, the first episode/post of 2016. But upon watching the twenty-four minute video, I finally came to understand something that I have been ambiguous about since I was in high school. What is trust? How do we build trust? How do we begin to trust others? And most importantly, how do we begin to trust ourselves?

I encourage you to watch the video as her eloquence and expertise will not be done justice with today’s post, but what I quickly realized as I began to reflect back on relationships and why I didn’t feel comfortable with them or why I let go or why I couldn’t invest further or find a deeper intimacy was because at least one of the pillars of trust that Brown lays out was missing.

Brown shares her acronym for defining or explaining concretely what trust looks like in BRAVING.

B —oundaries
R —eliability
A —ccountability
V —ault
I —ntegrity
N —on-judgment
G —enerosity

And with each pillar, I found myself nodding my head. For example, I speak about boundaries, and setting boundaries often here on the blog, but one area that is difficult for me is communicating them with others. For a handful of different reasons based on the boundary, person and situation I find myself, this is difficult for me. But I’ve also noticed that each time I do it it becomes easier, I become clearer and speak for more confidently. I have also recognized when others are communicating their boundaries, and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate this because I know how to precede with the relationship. Now I know where I can go, now I know where you stand, now I know what you are comfortable with and what you aren’t. They communicated, I’ve listened, and we can still move forward getting to know each other.

I think another part of the difficulty with boundaries is sometimes we don’t know where they are for ourselves. We’re still exploring and getting to know ourselves; therefore, unknowingly, we aren’t sure, so we present ourselves as a push-over when in reality, we just don’t know. However, as we continue to become more in tune with ourselves, the boundaries that we don’t want crossed start to crystalize. And when we become clear about what we know, we can be more flexible on what isn’t that big of a deal.

The trust part with boundaries begins when we communicate them clearly and determine if they are being respected, and visa versa, they’ve communicated with us their boundaries and they see us respecting what they’ve made clear.

Before I explain briefly what each of the pillars are, the most important part of trust that we often forget and where are self-confidence either flows from or is unable to sprout from is whether or not we trust ourselves. Self-trust.

Aha!

When we set boundaries of eliminating negative self-talk, respecting our bodies, spending within our means, we are respecting the boundaries that cultivate self-trust. But if we do not set boundaries to do so, we build self-doubt. So why then, if we don’t trust ourselves to adhere to each of the pillars would it be easier to trust others? It won’t be. Our doubt grows from having been hurt by others but also by how we’ve treated ourselves.

Getting back to my resolution for 2016, to cultivate trust. It begins by trusting ourselves. Let’s take a look at the definition of each of the pillars of trust.

B —oundaries — being clear about them and holding them, and clear about others’ and respecting them
R —eliability — trust them to do what they say they will do and this act is repeated consistently over time. Simultaneously  knowing our limitations and saying no, so that we can continue to be reliable with the commitments we make. 
A —countability — when you make a mistake, you own it, apologize and make amends. When someone else makes a mistake, they own it, apologize and make amends. And then you move forward and do not dwell.
V —ault — What I share with you will be kept in confidence. I hold others’ confidence as well and model it as to exemplify that the vault exists with others I have relationships with.
I —ntegrity — 3 Pieces: (1) choosing courage over comfort, (2) choosing what is right over what is fast or easy, (3) practicing your values not just professing them. 
N —on-judgment — to be able to fall apart, make a mistake, and ask for help without incurring judgment. We cannot assign value for needing help.
G —enerosity —Choosing to not assume the worst when someone doesn’t call, forgets or makes an error and then checking in by communicating while you missed them or would have liked to have heard from them, you understand it was an honest mistake, etc. State this sincerely, no guilt, not judgment, communicate and then move forward. 

Brown’s definition of trust is the tool that has been missing from my vocabulary all of my life. Perhaps you too were looking for the language to better communicate what you need or what was missing from relationships that you are are currently in, used to be in or wish to be in in the future.

In 2015, I made the move, I found the courage, I let go of some comfort and began again here in Bend. It was without question the right move for the life I want to lead, but there is still work to be done. The work now is taking place within: how to build trust and be more trustworthy, to recognize why I cannot be in relationships with people I may have been in relationships in the past and as well, and recognize why I can be in relationships with people as I move forward if I engage and exhibit trust.

Instead of assuming someone new is untrustworthy, base it on what they show you, not what other people have done to you. Cognitively we may have a reason to be guarded, but with attention to why our cognition is working in this way, we can retrain our minds, begin to behave and respond differently so that the results will be different as well.  And isn’t that what the opportunity of a new year is all about? Change? If we begin to do and think differently, the world we create and live within will be begin to respond differently as well.

You have more power within you than you realize. I am nowhere near the need of this journey of cultivating trust, but I am now more on my way than I have ever been before. Let’s make this an amazing year. Shall we?

~Brené Brown’s latest book Rising Strong

~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~How to Deal with Toxic People

~How to Construct a Healthy Social Circle

~How to Live a Courageous Life

 

Petit Plaisir
~ Mozart in the Jungle , an original Amazon television series

~Season 1

~Season 2

~Inspired by Blair Tindall’s book (2005) Mozart in the Jungle: Sex, Drugs and Classical Music

 

Images:(0)(1) (2)

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Au Courant Weekly: January 3, 2016

~The Simple Sophisticate, episode #76

International

—On Monday, Iraqi forces reclaimed Ramadi, a key city in Iraq, from ISIS who has maintained control for the past seven months. The New York Times reported that if Iraqi forces are able to maintain control of Ramadi, it could prove pivotal in pushing ISIS out of Iraq and reversing the gains in Syria.

—In the Israeli coastal city of Tel Aviv on Friday afternoon, a man opened fired at a popular bar, killing two and wounding at least three. The gunman then fled and is being sought by Israeli police. The motive and identity of the man is unclear, although speculation is rising. Police are not confirming anything as of yet.

—Storm Frank has prompted hundreds evacuations and massive power outages in parts of NW England, SW Scotland and Northern Ireland. On December 28th Storm Frank was the sixth storm to be named in the United Kingdom and Ireland’s Met Office 2015/16 naming of extratropical cyclones as winds topped 85 mph (137 km/h).

National: United States

—On December 22, the U.S. Census Bureau released data on population growth/decline, as well as the migration patterns of those who have moved from one state to the next. As of July 1st of the past year, it is estimated that 321.4 million people live in the United States, increasing 12.7 million (4.1%) since 2010. Seventy percent of the growth occurred in only ten states: Texas, California, Florida, Georgia, North Carolina, Washington, Arizona, Colorado, New York and Virginia. However, why each state grew differs. Read more here.

—Beginning prior to Christmas and continuing into the new year, parts of Missouri, Illinois, Texas, Tennessee, Arkansas and Mississippi have been in the path of wicked winter weather. Twenty-two people have been killed in Missouri and Illinois, as waters have risen to historic levels with the arrival and devastation of the winter storm. On Tuesday, Jay Nixon, the governor of Missouri, declared a state of emergency and deployed the National Guard. On December 23rd, tornadoes caused as many as 14th deaths in Arkansas, Mississippi and Tennessee, and on December 27th Dallas, Texas, incurred three tornadoes that caused 11 deaths.

—New year, new laws. Many laws across that country that were passed in 2015, went into effect Friday January 1st. From Hawaii raising the age one must be to buy cigarettes and tobacco products to 21, to Oregon being the first state to allow birth control to be sold by pharmacists without a prescription, there are many new laws to be aware of. Be sure to check your local newspaper and state government websites.

—Singer and daughter of the iconic Nat King Cole, Natalie Cole died late Thursday December 31st in Los Angeles at the age of 65 due to congestive heart failure prompted by “hepatitis C and various health complications from a 2009 kidney transplant from which she never fully recovered”, as reported by the Los Angeles Times.

Politics

In less than one month, the first stage of the 2016 U.S. Presidential election will begin with the Iowa Caucuses taking place on February 1st. Look for January to be a bevy of candidates vying for the camera and voters’ attention even more than we’ve seen in 2015.

Arts & Entertainment

—Amazon reported that 25% of American households have a Prime Membership. Its share of U.S. e-commerce sales jumped to 26 percent this year from 22 percent last year, a research firm estimates as reported by The New York Times.

—Downton Abbey final season premiere takes place tonight on PBS Masterpiece at 9pm and will consist of nine episodes wrapping up on Sunday March 6th.

Bendite Event of the Week

—Skating at The Pavillion has opened! Beginning December 28th, the outdoor, covered Olympic sized hockey rink located at the corner of Colorado and Simpson avenues in southwest Bend is opened to the public. Having been under construction for just over a year, the Pavilion will be a year-round facility that will host court sports such as tennis and basketball during the warmer part of the year. Available for free skating, hockey, curling and more, check out all that the Pavillion has to offer. For $3 for a pair of rentals and $9 for adults, the free skating hours are sure to offer a fun outdoor winter activity.

French Word of the Week

Le goûter

Bonjour, this is Géraldine from Comme une Française.com. I’m here to share the latest French Word of the Week: a simple very French word for your Simply Luxurious Life in France.

“Le goûter” is the traditional 4 PM French snack. We say “prendre le goûter” and for children, it’s the symbol of after school, as they leave the class at 4.30PM. They’ll have “un croissant” or “un pain au chocolat” or maybe something else. And sometimes “un chocolat chaud”. But it can also be a fruit, a few sweets, cake, biscuit…

And adults can have “un goûter” too, even though they may say “viens pour le café” or “viens pour le thé”, which is more of a grown-up thing to say. But it will be the same.

In France, not eating between meals is a very important rule, to prevent people from snacking all the time. We say “Ne pas manger entre les repas” : “Don’t eat between meals” And usually, children won’t have anything to eat between le goûter and “le dîner” around 7PM.

Le goûter is really a nice time to sit and enjoy a piece of cake or un pain au chocolat with a big smile, in the middle of the afternoon.

If you want to add more French in your Simply Luxurious Life, join me on Comme une Française.com for weekly video tips to sound French, even to the French! And it’s free.

Thought to Ponder

~Posts You Might Enjoy:

~What Is Au Courant Weekly? Find out HERE.

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The post Au Courant Weekly: January 3, 2016 appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

TSLL Planner: Building a Simply Luxurious 2016!

“When you establish a destination by defining what you want, then take physical action by making choices that move you towards that destination, the possibility for success is limitless and arrival at the destination is inevitable.” ― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

Well, TSLL readers, 2016 has officially begun and as I wake up on the new year that is 2016, I have a handful of resolutions, as I imagine many of you do as well. But unless we put a plan in place to attain the resolutions we seek, we deny them the opportunity to materialize.

What will your desired destination be? Okay.Now what actions will move you ever closer towards that destination? Success is yours if you put in place a plan. It may be slow, but if you strive forward in the direction towards your destination, you will eventually arrive.

I have long been a planner, a visual observer, someone who sincerely derives great satisfaction from writing my goals down, breaking them into small steps and regularly checking in to determine my progress. The feeling of placing a signifying  “check” through a small step that has been achieved is priceless.

And as my direction and a clear understanding of what and where I want my life to go and how I have come to understand is the best way to travel, I have begun to be quite selective with what I need from my daily and monthly planning system.

As the idea of creating a custom planning system for myself has been dancing around in my mind, I began this past year to receive emails from readers requesting a simply luxurious life planner which included TSLL well-known illustrations by Inslee and was in alignment with the simply luxurious life mission statement.

Initially, I was going to create a hold-in-your-hand planner, but then I recognized that daily planning pages would not be able to be included. I NEED daily planning pages. They are my lifeline to visualizing the day ahead and ensuring at the end of the day that I have accomplished what I need to inch ever closer to my goals.

Many of you may already know that a long list of bloggers offer their own templates for their readers to print out, but again, none of them offered precisely what I knew I needed to successfully live my life. So I went to work.

I complied a list of all options available when it came to planner pages, and then I made a list of what was needed how to synchronize the postings on the blog and podcast and premise of living simply luxuriously to create an entirely unique, yet simplified planning system. In other words, I wanted to create a planner that was top quality and eliminated the unnecessary. And thus, TSLL Planner templates were created.

How to Use TSLL Planner PDF Templates:

Purchases can only be made on desktops (not tablets or smart phones)
Designed for personal use only.
Each printable page is designed to be 8.5″ x 11″

each printable page includes 2 planner pages


Designed to fit into a Classic Franklin binder , but any style of binder will work (you may resize as well prior to printing)

Future sizes will be made available. Please do email me or comment below to let me know which size you prefer.


Decide and purchase what you need (an all inclusive planner or a complete planner, goals pages, monthly calendar, etc)
Click on “Add to Cart” and keep shopping as necessary.
Click on Check-Out when complete.
Upon completion of purchase, you will receive an email with all of the downloads, save them to your computer so you can print them as often as you need.
Only 3 downloads of each link will be available, otherwise you will need to purchase the item again (by saving the downloads, you avoid this).
Print on a color-printer that prints on both sides of the paper (FedEx/Kinkos and Office Depot will do this for you if you need it).
Make copies as necessary

Cut each paper in half
Hole-punch where necessary to fit with your binder
Cut off a small triangle (dog-ear) at the top and bottom of the inside corner for easy turning of the pages


Voilá! You now have a brand new streamlined planner to help you achieve your goals, cultivate a stylish, timeless, chic wardrobe, and cultivate a productive and healthy everyday that will enable you to live a refined life on an everyday income.

Below I will share in detail what is available and prices for each item, along with images. Don’t need more details? Click here to begin shopping and create your very own TSLL Planner.

~My personal TSLL planner templates in my Franklin Classic binder.~

What’s available:


Daily Planning pages

(5.5″ x 8.5″) – two per printable sheet ($2 each)

customize which of the twelve TSLL illustrations you would prefer (see images below)

Stylist Office
Travel
Francophile
Cooking
Dog Walker
Umbrella Couple
Oscar de la Renta dress
Lady in White
Sanctuary
Cover Girl
Fashion Week
Bubble Bath

Each daily planning page includes:

French blue oval for the day, date and month
T0-Do List (six lines), with coordinating “check” completion system
Health/Fitness checklist

Water (each box equals 16 oz)

Per the recommended 8 glasses of 8 oz a day, check off throughout the day to help you to remain hydrated. Why? It hydrates your body, flushes out toxins, helps skin and hair look radiant, controls body temperature, heart rate and blood pressure and keeps your hunger in check. Often we are merely dehydrated, not hungry. What counts? Tea, coffee and some fruit (did you know that watermelon is 90% water?) Learn more here.


Aerobic (20 minutes or more of increased heart rate to fat-burning levels), 2-5 days a week
Strength (2-3 days/wk of strengthening exercises)
Flexibility (5 minutes every morning or 1-3 times a week)
Mindfulness (daily: meditation, a restorative walk or check this post out)


Daily Schedule
Notes section:

Expense tracker (business and/or personal)
Simple Luxury

Enjoy at least one simple luxury every day. This space could also be used to keep track of what you are grateful for each day.

(Sample below): Daily Page planner with Oscar de la Renta dress illustration

All Inclusive Planner Package ($25)

All 12 different daily planning pages illustrations (see above)
Cover Page

Personal & Business Contact information

physical address
email address
phone number


3 blank lined pages designated for Quotes to be Inspired By

All Inclusive Planner Package continues

Monthly Calendar (2-page layout)includes Monthly Cover pages

Monthly To-Dos (both personal & business)
Blank lined pages for Ideas/Notes/Dreams

All Inclusive Planner Package continues below

Goals Template (long terms goals & short term progress)
Capsule Wardrobe Planner (spring/summer & fall/winter)
Lists pages

2 pages of Places to Visit
2 pages of Books to Read, Movies to Watch, Podcasts to Listen To, Music to Download & Plays to See

All Inclusive Day Planner (one illustration for day planning pages) ($5)

Select which illustration for your day planning pages

You may add additional illustrations for day planning pages for $2 each


Cover Pages (as seen above)
Monthly Calendar, 2 pages

Monthly To-Dos (personal & business)
Ideas/Notes/Dreams page


Goals Planner (long term goals & short term progress)
Capsule Wardrobe Planner (spring/summer & fall/winter)
Lists pages (same as above)

 

Goals Planner $1


Lists Pages – $2


Capsule Wardrobe Planner – $1


Monthly Calendar – $2


Click here to begin shopping!

~I am always looking to add or tweak TSLL Planner templates. Please do share how the planner would best suit your life, keeping in mind that the planner offerings will always align with living simply luxuriously. Thank you for your interest and may your new year be the most success you’ve had yet.

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The post TSLL Planner: Building a Simply Luxurious 2016! appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.