Vivian Probst's Blog, page 4

February 18, 2015

Are men reading 'Death by Roses'?

When your book cover shows the legs of a woman sitting on a toilet, you’d think that men would pass it by as ‘chick lit’. It could be the red high heels she’s wearing, but men are indeed picking up ‘Death by Roses’ and reading it—with rave reviews. And unless they are hopeless liars, they are enjoying the book very much. I’ve even heard that some couples are reading the story together!

Truth is, ‘Death by Roses’ is as much about Art McElroy as it is about his wife Mae Rose. (She just looks better on the toilet!) Both are completely unaware of the love they could have shared until Mae Rose dies. Once she gets what could have been, she wants to come back and fix everything, which makes a mess of everything. Or as one reader suggested, ‘when Mae Rose gets to heaven, all hell breaks loose!’

There is no such thing as going back—we can’t be who we were of course and most of us wouldn’t want to be, but we can be who we are now and go forward. People sometimes ask me if I think every marriage is fixable, if we just look at our relationship from a different and ‘higher’ perspective like Art and Mae Rose learn to do. I can’t answer that question universally but I believe that if we look at our most intimate relationships with an eye on the opportunity to ‘dial up’ a better outcome on a regular basis, it sure beats waiting until later to see what could have been. If there is any truth to the story--that someday, we will have the opportunity to see what could have been--I like imagining that now so that I can enjoy the benefits sooner. So grab your partner and dance to ‘Death by Roses’!

Vivian
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Published on February 18, 2015 10:11

February 4, 2015

IT'S LAUNCH DAY! (What my septic tank taught me about life)

Wherever you are today, I hope you will raise a glass of something and join me in a toast to the launch of ‘Death by Roses’! ‘Launch’ means that the book is now available on-line and through bookstores!

I started the day by jumping out of bed and giving thanks. Then I bundled up in 4-degree weather to celebrate by launching myself on my toboggan. Got stuck on top of the septic tank. HA! My husband picked me up and we went back up the hill on his ATV so that I could go back down again and again.

Then I got the lessons:

First, you have to put yourself in a place of possibility—in this case, SNOW and a hill; in my novel’s case, a story and When Words Count Retreat.

Next, you have to take the ride; you might not get as far as you want to go at first but you’re laying tracks so keep doing what you’re doing. That’s how it felt when my story went through a lot of work to prepare for the Publishing Trifecta.

Once you’ve got a path, you can go farther, faster. If I’d stopped my toboggan ride just because my first run ended on top of that septic tank hill, I’d be missing all the fun! So, keep laying the track. ‘Chop wood; carry water’. Edit, Edit, Edit.

Then, be sure to enjoy the ride, wherever it takes you. The most precious thing about today’s sledding wasn’t that it was FAST. It was a slow-motion wonder so that I could focus on hearing the swish of the toboggan as the world went by. Pure pleasure! The journey of ‘Death by Roses’ has been like that for me. Having a successful book takes time and patience so enjoy the journey and the scenery along the way!

Finally, give thanks for all the support! It’s a lot more difficult to enjoy tobogganing if you have to haul your own sled up the hill. Enough said?

Here’s who I thank today:

My husband!

Steve Eisner and the staff at When Words Count Retreat!

SelectBooks, my publisher!

Rachel Ekstrom (Irene Goodman Literary Agency)!

Meryl Moss (MLM/Media Muscle)!

All of the people who share in this adventure who are far too numerous to name!

Stay tuned and give thanks! What a difference YOU make to life!

Vivian!
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Published on February 04, 2015 09:44 Tags: launch-day

January 23, 2015

So...You Want to Write a Book?

But you don’t know how to start… and it feels daunting.

Welcome to the haunted house of authordom where you will be spooked on a regular basis with terrifying reasons not to begin or if you’ve begun, not to finish. Procrastination hell.

Thoughts might go around in your head like a video on fast forward with no STOP button. Thoughts like: ‘I’m not gifted enough; my story wouldn’t interest anyone else; I don’t have time or money; I can’t handle that type of rejection; I’ll die (of shame, embarrassment, etc.); Who do I think I am?’

Here’s another secret: if you hear people on the outside of your life questioning you on any of these matters, know that they are saying to your face what you’re telling yourself on the inside. You have to deal with your fear. We all do.

As if that’s not enough, you’ve watched movies of failed writers—there are so many. You might also have heard that writers have committed suicide or that writers suffer terrible depression and/or writer’s block.

Enough already.

I’d like to paint a different picture. One that I hope offers you reassurance and comfort so that you understand from the start, it’s not about YOU—it’s about what wants to be created through you. The question is only if you’re willing-not if you’re good. The story and editors will take care of that part.

Secondly, the story is more afraid of you than you are of it. It’s afraid you won’t write it or that you’ll try to change it to make it more marketable. I’ve certainly argued with my story characters from time to time but giving in is always the best choice. You have to prove yourself worthy of the story before it will come out of hiding (it’s been inside you a very long time).

Next, just write. If you love it, just do it! It’s a blast to be in the flow. I benefited from reading ‘The Artist’s Way’ by Julia Cameron. I couldn’t have written what I have until I learned that a) every one of us is an artist and b) writing even gibberish for 30-minutes each day (she calls it Morning Pages) will ease you into the process. So if you’re terrified that you’re making a HUGE commitment, back off it a bit. Just promise yourself that you’ll write something every day and it doesn’t matter what it is.

Finally, think about how you’ll feel at the end of your life if you don’t do it. That’s true about almost anything. When my mother passed away very suddenly at age 65 (I am now 62) I got a strong message—DO NOT ALLOW REGRET TO OVERWHELM YOU. I knew I wanted to write—that if I lived this life without writing, I was going to miss out on something BIG.

Oh, one last thing—there is tremendous support for you. You can’t see it, but it’s there. Just watch. Life will arrange itself to give you time and material to write. Once you show your intent, it will open doors for you that you can’t imagine. And the truth about writer’s block? There is no such thing. If you can’t think of something to write, don’t. The story lives in you. All you have to do is listen.

Vivian Probst
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Published on January 23, 2015 11:25 Tags: writer-s-block

January 13, 2015

The Blushing Author

Death by Roses is a HIT with Midwest Book Review

“Superbly crafted…original…riveting…remarkable…solid entertainment from the first page to the last…

What more could a new author hope for? Dear friends, each of you knows that every step of this journey has been full of magic and miracles. Book editor Nancy Sugihara (SelectBooks) noticed this review and sent it over last night. I had just crawled into bed here in Washington DC where I am attending an affordable housing conference. Whereupon, I immediately arose, dressed, and went down to the bar where I found some conference attendees to celebrate with over a glass of bourbon. Staying in bed was impossible! You understand, don’t you?

Is this for real? Is it happening? YES! Bless each and every one of you. Share the good news with everyone you know! (“Heaven, I’m in heaven…”)

Vivian!
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Published on January 13, 2015 11:18 Tags: midwest-book-review

December 30, 2014

Who Moved My Life? November 17, 2014

One month after soft book launch...

Not many people know I’m an author yet. But the Universe does and all of a sudden, things are different. I can’t explain it but I can feel and see it. ‘Death by Roses’ is making a difference already!

This past week I received another e-mail that made my entire being tingle. ‘Vivian,’ it said. ‘I read you book and I loved it. Then I gave it to my 89-year old mother and she loved it too. She said it helped her resolved some old relationship issues both with people who are living, and those are not.’

From the beginning, I sensed that ‘Death by Roses’ would be an incredibly fun and irreverent way to look at life from a ‘higher’ perspective. The divine spark that wrote the story using me as a willing accomplice, reminded me constantly, “This is the one. This is what we want to say to the world. It will be your first published book. Trust us. Don’t try to write what you think people will like—JUST LISTEN!”

I learned that ‘listening’ is the key to any artistic endeavor--letting the life that wants to create through you actually tell you what to do. If we listen, we will know what to do. Writing ‘Death by Roses’ has been doing the same thing for me except that now that it’s published, I am literally watching my world change right before my eyes. Everything I used to do; everything I thought I was; everyone I know and love (or not), are different. It’s as if I now have different eyes. I don’t understand it but it’s like I’ve walked through a veil and am on the other side, which is more glorious and more real than what I’m used to. Or, perhaps I’m just losing my mind?

I didn’t write ‘Death by Roses’ because I wanted to change anything about my life; I don’t want the world around me to change. But it’s happening anyway. I wanted to step into being an author just like I step into the tub at night. Easy, relaxed, feeling good in my skin. But so far, it’s been more like stepping onto a roller coaster. I soar so high with delight and plunge into despair on a regular basis. It feels like falling in love. I feel crazy, stupid, silly, and on top of the world!

I confess that I have fallen in love with ‘Death by Roses’ and it’s more distracting than I thought it would be for other things that are part of my ‘normal’ life. My creative energy is now all about reweaving my life so that it embraces my new love more. All those years I’ve been spending writing are now over and I just want to play with my new pet project. There are days when it’s easy to move around my universe with my book and my consulting work; there are days when it feels impossible to do both. There are days when I am cranky and I don’t know why; days when I love the whole world so much that I feel (and probably behave) outrageously.

Example: Two weeks ago, I sang karaoke in front of a group of people that hire me to consult with them. I teach tax regulations all day and then I go to my room to catch up on other work. But not that night. For some reason I felt like I wanted to party with the group. (This is NOT normal). They didn’t expect me to be there; neither did I but I loved it! I felt so free that I even danced! I guess that’s part of it—I feel liberated, as if a part of me that been hiding in the spaces of my mind, completing this work, now gets to come out and play. But watch out, there’s a new story shaping up so this could be a very short reprieve.
Death by Roses
I’m on a plane, flying to Denver where my sister Mary will pick me up and we’ll spend 4 days together in the Rocky Mountains—the mountains are such a grounding place to be. Everything that feels so important pales against the majestic quietness of a landscape only a divine Artist could create. We’ve got two book events scheduled and Mary is going to sing ‘The Richest People in the World’ (a song from the book) as a duet with a male singer. I LOVE that song; I can’t wait to share these experiences with her. But then, it still all comes down to listening. To the quiet space beyond thought where true magic happens. Write on!
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Published on December 30, 2014 11:36

A VIEW FROM CLOUD 10! Celebrating the ‘soft’ launch* of ‘Death by Roses’! October 21, 2014

What a perfectly magical evening I shared with sixty friends on Oct. 14th at Water2Wine in Brookfield, WI. I know—you want pictures—you want to see the magical dress and all the incredible moments! I want to see them too. AARRGGHH! It is so hard to wait, isn’t it? But our marvelous photographer TJ Lambert of Stages Photography has promised them shortly. We are waiting as eagerly as the ‘Night Before Christmas’!

Special moments:

MY FAMILY WAS PRESENT!

My father, Sterling Theobald, step-mother Ruth Ann Theobald, brother, Paul Theobald, and sister Mary Hunter were with me to celebrate. Mary’s trip was iffy from the beginning due to a very busy schedule and commitments that had been on her calendar for months. But—VOILA! Somehow she found a flight that worked. It was a short visit—just 30 hours—but she got here. I think sister Cheryl was busy reworking things from higher realms—not meddling**—oh no! Just carefully watching for possibilities.

CELEBRATING BIRTHDAYS!

The 14th was my 62nd birthday which made the day even more special. My husband Tom had celebrated his birthday just two days prior and my father had his 89th birthday coming up so, to my sister Mary leading us in ‘Happy Birthday’, we sang enthusiastically as 218 candles were blown out (actually there were only 3 candles, a ‘2’, and ‘1’, and an ‘8’).

THE WONDERFUL ARRIVAL OF DIANE AND ADAM LOEB!

I dedicated ‘Death by Roses’ to my late sister, Cheryl, and to a man who made an incredible difference in my life, Fred Loeb. Diane is his wife and Adam, his son. I was over the moon to see them! Fred, I know you’re not physically present, but thanks for getting both of them together for this marvelous occasion. Adam lives in New York City and would not have been in Wisconsin except to assist his mother to relocate an elderly family member.

GETTING TO SAY "I WON!"

When I won the Publishing Trifecta last year, there wasn’t much celebrating. My win meant that 3 other authors didn’t (win) and it was sad for them. We sat around, drank champagne, and wept together because we wanted all of us to win—it became an evening of consoling.

But on October 14th, surrounded by family and friends, I got to say it. “I WON!” with all the enthusiasm and joy that I could express. It was incredible!

READING FROM MY BOOK!

There is nothing in the world like being able to read your book to an audience of family and friends—with music in the background--heavenly! I hope to record these book segments and post them on our website one of these days. As most people said, “Now I really have to buy the book because I need to know what happens next!”

We’ve had two more book events since then and more are scheduled. Orders are coming in; reviews as well. It’s a Wonderful Life!

*Soft launch: Since ‘Death by Roses’ is not scheduled for publisher release until February next year, SelectBooks gave me a special gift by agreeing to print copies for me to sell during the next few months. It’s beyond words to hold your own book in your hands!



**In ‘Death by Roses’, meddling is the act of an afterlife being interfering in the lives of human beings and causes specific outcomes. Meddling means changing those outcomes without the permission of the person and has some awful consequences such as being ‘vanished’. You really must read this story and see the wonderful afterlife that I was given to write about!

AS OF THIS WRITING WE HAVE 3 PEOPLE WHO HAVE FINISHED READING ALREADY!

Words like ‘brilliant’ and ‘polished’, have been used. One woman who doesn’t read books, finished it in two days! Shucks, it feels good!

***

Events like these take the efforts of real people doing real work. My thanks goes out to Anne Wondra, Beth Holbrook, Rita Hale, Rhonda Begos and her band, Susie Losinske, Larry and Barb VanHoveln, owners of Water2Wine.
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Published on December 30, 2014 11:33