Bryan Parady's Blog, page 31

When Life Hits Hard

 

Life is relentless. It can be filled with joyous occasions, but it can also sucker punch us till we are bent over with pain.

I think we all have moments when we want to throw in the towel and say “enough is enough”.  I know I do.

There are times when I’m tired of the fight, tired of making my way, tired of striving towards the goal, tired of hitting the gym, of the same routine day in and day out.

We have these seasons of life.  It’s not some crazy frantic thing that makes us weird for feeling it.  It simply is the way things are.

We were created to go through times like this, we have strength to get through these times, and they will pass.

I know when we are in them it seems like it will never be over, it seems like we are stuck in some type of quick sand that sucks us down and is always trying to bury us.

But it’s so vitally important to really dig in and press hard during these times. Remind yourself that you are strong enough to overcome any obstacle, to beyond any hurdle.  And when you do you will become even more confident and more strong.

So be prepared for the times that kick your butt, and prepare yourself ahead of time for them.

But above all remember, you can kick the crap out of hard times and come out the victor.

Take The Path

You know what you have to do. It’s been eating at you for some time now.  Something is not quite right. You wake up wishing for it, but have to keep it quiet and shuffle through your hum drum day.  You go to that job you are thankful for but don’t love.  You wish deep down there was something different….something more.

In reality you’ve always known.  Ever since you were young you wanted this.  It may have come out in different forms, but it was there.

Aren’t you ready?  Aren’t  you sick of shutting it up deep inside, only to save face, and appear to be living the dream (though it’s the dream of someone else).

It’s time to throw off the hand cuffs of mediocrity.  Shout from the rooftops.  Go do your daring adventure starting TODAY.  Not tomorrow, or next year, or when this happens or that.

Now.  Do it. You know what passion lies in you.  You know exactly what dream you have. So quit living a fake life.  Bust your butt, ignore what everyone says you “should” do and start living out your dream.  Be creative, work hard, follow YOUR dream.  Prepare for failure it will come, but get right back up and learn from it.  You can, and you will achieve your dream if you chase hard enough.  Don’t give up, and for goodness sake start today. You’ve got one life.

Make the most of it and run, don’t walk.  You were born to chase your dream.

Have Fun

Life can be demanding, stressful, hectic,and downright cruel sometimes. In the midst of the day to day things we have to do, work, college, shopping, raising children, cleaning, maintaining the home and vehicles, things can get overwhelming.

Routine is good because it keeps us on target, but there are occasions when routine needs to go bye-bye for a day.

It’s no coincidence that laughter they say is the best medicine.  This is because it truly relaxes us and makes us feel good about ourselves and our life.

Fun and laughter while maybe not “productive” in the sense of getting us closer to our goals, is productive in another sense.  In the sense of it recharges us, it keeps us from having breakdowns and reminds us that we do enjoy laughing.

When all these things take place we are better able to then focus on our goals and get things done.

We need a healthy balance in our life of both fun and determination and work.  One without the other leaves us lacking significantly.

So if you are driven on seeing your goals fulfilled and are working your butt off good for you! Keep it up, but remember to throw some fun things in once in awhile.

Listening

 

This saying above fits a problem that I struggle with sometimes. There are times when I find myself in a conversation not truly listening to understand, but listening either.

A. to come up with a solution

or

B. I’m thinking of my response before the other person finishes.

Both of these habits are destructive to good communication.  They take the focus off the speaker and move it to ourselves.

Knowing this and practicing it however are two totally different things.  To truly understand it we really have to embrace empathy, which is us striving to really understand where the other person is coming from. Putting ourselves in their shoes.

It’s not a matter of me coming up with a solution, it’s not a matter of my opinion, it’s a matter of caring enough about the other person to just let them talk and have someone who genuinely wants to listen and care for them.

Bigger Than Yourself

I have a problem.  I am selfish.  Not incredibly so but still, it’s there.  I like to think that I am a kind giving person willing to do anything for my family, and that is pretty true.  But what other things do I really lay my life down for?

How am I helping those who are less fortunate than my family and I?  Those who are downcast, who are being abused, mistreated, sold for sex, those living in a box, those going to bed hungry.

What am I don’t outside my cozy four walls?

It’s a sobering question that kind of smacks me back to reality and makes me realize I live a very selfish life.  Selfish if measured against what I do for those who are hurting.

Because in truth, I wish I was doing more, and the fact that I am wishing that makes me realize I am not doing enough.

 

Plans

Making plans is usually a pretty easy straight-forward process.   It’s the seeing them through until you reach your goal that is the difficult part.  Sometimes we can make plans but they just don’t pan out.  Circumstances may change, people involved may change or lose interest, and so your plans end up not getting you to your goal. This is pretty normal and doesn’t mean everything is over.

It just means your plans need to be adjusted.  Your goal shouldn’t change, just the way you get there.  Don’t ever make plans in cement because they have to change.

When you make plans you need to go into knowing the end goal, but also knowing that circumstances that are beyond your control will change.  If you are dead set on a plan this can be very discouraging when the time comes.  But if you have the perspective that your plans are not permanent, then when the time comes to change them it won’t matter much.

So stay flexible and be open to changing your plan.

Be True

 

 

 

Have you ever felt like you have to prove yourself to someone else.  You feel as if they are controlling your life more than you are. Like they have some kind of say as to what is good enough and what isn’t?

Allowing others to control our decisions and actions can be very dangerous because in the process we lose ourselves. We lose our character, and what makes us unique.

Stay original, stay true to who you are.  We can take others viewpoints, and see if there is anything we can learn from it ,but we shouldn’t just take what others say at face value without questioning their motives or whether or not they are looking out for you or themselves.

Those who truly care about you will encourage you in your pursuits, and they will ask questions that make you think rather than degrade what you are doing.

So examine those around you and cut ties with friends who may try to bring you down.

Stay true to you.

Someday

 

 

 

Results don’t happen overnight. If you are working towards a goal it takes time, it takes hard work, sweat, and tears.

Whether you are writing a novel, building a business, fighting for a relationship, achieving physical goals, getting your degree, or interviewing for that dream job, you have to work hard.

Not only do you have to work hard, but you have to stick with it.  The age old saying “Rome wasn’t built in a day” sticks around for a reason, because there is so much truth in it.

Things don’t change over night, go into things knowing that.  It could take weeks, months, or years to get where you want.

It can be easy to get overwhelmed when presented with how long something might take to achieve, but you have to look at today, and what you have to do today.

Look at it this way. Sure if you start today, it make take two years to get to where you want.  But if you don’t start, nothing will ever change.  So is it worth 2 years to live the rest of your life happy with things or is it better to take the easy way out and be miserable forever.

Stop delaying and coming up with excuses. Start today and the results will come.

Making It Count

 

We live in a day and age where diets are king.  You can go online or walk into any bookstore and pick just about any diet you want.  They make great promises to get you in shape, and get your weight under control, but they in truth are just fads.

Then you have workout programs, there are a million of those too.

But in reality if you want to get your body in shape, both mentally and physically there are only two things you have to do.  Eat good, and workout.

It’s that simple.

But in an attempt to make things easier as well as make money, companies tell you otherwise.  There are everything from creams, to wraps, to pills that claim they will make you lose weight.

All these might work for a very short time.  But it’s like putting a band aid on a limb that’s been chopped off.  Pretty ineffective.

You want to get in shape?  Quit eating out, stop eating mac and cheese and burgers for dinner.  Do some research online on what it  means to eat clean.  Eat white meats, chicken, fish, fresh veggies, whole grain foods.  Ditch the soda, the sweets, and the grease.

Diet is huge. It’s almost everything.

Second, do something.  Go to the gym, get a bike, get out in your neighborhood and run.  You don’t have to have fancy equipment, you don’t have to spend a fortune on a gym.  I spend $20 bucks a month on my gym.  That’s less than most people spend on Starbucks a week.

If you want to change your body, then you have to do something.  Don’t expect a quick fix, or a miracle pill, they don’t exist, and anyone who tries to tell you otherwise is lying.  Bust your butt, and get to work.  It’ll pay off.

Fuel The Fire

 

What fuels your fire?  What can you talk about and not get bored of?  What do you look forward to greatly?  Whatever your answer is to these questions are you doing it?  Are you actively pursuing what makes you come alive?

It’s really easy to get into the mindset that we have to find what other people want or need and then try to just fulfill that rather than pursuing what makes us feel alive.

We think that we should get a good stable job, get that degree everyone is saying, live in this or that city etc.  But what turns you on when it comes to dreams and goals?

Because even though other people don’t know it, and even though you yourself might not know it, the thing you need the most is to fan that flame inside you.  The world needs you to fan that flame, because those who have gone before us and blazed new trails and who we look up as being so inventive and great?  All they did was chase after their passion with total abandonment.

So stop chasing empty things, and go after what brings you alive.