Bryan Parady's Blog, page 30

Above Your Means

How often do we feel we need something?  We want to buy things it makes us feel good. Whether it’s for personal use or for the intent of trying to impress someone else.

But what it really does is get us into trouble. Everywhere you look these days we are bombarded with credit, 0 down, and no interest for however many months.  We are accustomed to buying things when we don’t have the money.

But this is a dangerous game to play, because it stretches us beyond what we should be capable of.  It builds our debt rather than our wealth, and it doesn’t teach us to wait for things, but feeds into the idea that whatever we want we can have now.

What’s worse is it feeds into a cycle, you want to feel good, or better so you go buy that new toy, but soon it loses it’s lack-luster and it’s time for the next bigger and better thing. Your phone still works great but 7 months after buying it the newer version comes out and you have to get it.  Why is this?

It’s time we are more aware of our buying decisions and start to be cautions with our spending as well as putting off purchases that we can’t afford to make.

It will be worth it.

Selfless

 

 

How do we be selfless?  What does it mean to do acts of service?  Does it look a certain way?  Sound a certain way?  Or is it simply a mindset we have towards others?

In our day and age it is really easy to become self absorbed.  It’s not even intentional that we become self absorbed, but between our social media, get ahead, me first society it’s very easy to lose sight of helping other people. It’s easy to lose sight of how we truly gain in this world by giving of ourselves.

It doesn’t have to be a certain way, look or sound a certain way, it just needs to be done out of self service.  You giving of yourself to make it better for someone else.  It can be as simple as a kind word.  Going out of your way to get someone something they love.

Do a chore for someone, help someone mow their lawn, clean their house.

It doesn’t have to be any big thing, it’s just simply showing someone that you care enough to do something kind for someone else.

What Are You Doing?

 

 

 

While life throws a lot of curve balls and plants a lot of obstacles in our way, there is really only one obstacle that we have in our life, and that is ourselves.

Every single person has dreams and aspirations of what they would love to be.  But not everyone actually becomes those things.  Why is that?  Is it because some just aren’t meant to achieve their goals?  Or is it something more?

Life is going to throw an insane amount of things your way, but how you respond to them and what you do is going to determine whether or not you make it to who you want to be in life.  You have to make choices and decisions that will require a lot of sacrifice and hard work in order to get to your dream.

But it is possible.  If you are dead set on achieving your goal then the word failure shouldn’t even exist for you.

It’s up to you on who and what you will become.

Distractions

Distractions are everywhere.  They keep us from doing the things we were created and meant to do in this world.  They come in all shapes and sizes, from hobbies that take over our lives, to video games, to social media, television, even families can be used as a crux and distraction from us pursuing our calling.

It can be very challenging to pull ourselves away from the distractions.

If you feel like you are being overwhelmed with distractions, take a few hours sometime this week to get by yourself.  You may have to get up really early in the morning before the kids, or blot out a few hours from your weekend, however, you do it, take a few hours.  Don’t your phone, don’t have a tablet or computer.  No television or music allowed.

Get a notebook.  You know one of those things that is bound and has pages in it to write on.  Get a cup of coffee or tea, or whatever you enjoying sipping on and just think about the things you love.

Make a list of all the things you love to do, maybe they are things you haven’t done in ages.

Once you are done with your list, pick a few of the top ones. Then plan how you are going to do get involved in at least one of those the next week.  Right down specifics, including when you are going to do it, what you’ll need, etc.  Continue to do this each week.

A few hours each week. The second week reevaluate your list, you’ll probably find you have thought of more things to add, or creative ways to do the things on  your list.

Get free from distractions and start being in control of your life again.

It Gets Better

 

Sometimes we go through really hard times in a relationship. We question everything we thought about the other person.  Question whether they truly love us or care about us. When things are hard, they are usually really hard, and it can be difficult to see beyond the pain and the hurt.

Then to make matters worse our mind starts racing with all these worst case scenarios. We wonder what will happen since our significant other is angry. Will they do more things to hurt us?  And so our imagination runs wild.

One of the best and most helpful things to remember in times like these, is that the current situation will pass.  You won’t forever feel this way, neither will the person you love.  When the dust settles, and smoke clears, you’ll find that you are the same people.  In marriage this is crucial.  You have to hold onto the reality that your spouse does love you, just at the moment neither of you “feel” any of that towards each other.

Coming to terms with that will make it better, and then realizing it won’t be like this for long. Whatever the disunity stems from, be humble, ask for forgiveness, don’t hold out and try to “win” the fight.  It’s not about winning.

Stick with it in hard times.  You agreed to that.  For better or worse. And while in a perfect world the worse wouldn’t exist, but it makes the better all the more good.  So stick with it.

Staying Positive

It can be easy to have a negative outlook on things.  Whether it’s our family, our work, bills, we tend to focus on what we don’t have, what we wish we had, or what we could’ve had.

There is always going to be something we wish we had.  A better job, car, house, etc.  But when we spend our lives consumed with what we don’t have we make both ourselves and those around us miserable, because we focus solely on our own miserable state.

When we look at the positive side of things our whole attitude will change to match it.  Each day remind yourself of what you are thankful for.  Be thankful for the job you do have, even if it’s not your ideal, you are able to pay your bills, your family, a car that runs. A place to live.  If you have these things you are considered rich when compared with the world.

There are always things you can be thankful for.  Focus on those and stay positive, you will be much happier.

More Than A Quick Fix

By now you may be scratching your head what even happened to your new years resolutions.  For some they are no more than a memory.  You see, using new years as a reason to make a resolution is a waste if you aren’t continually resolving to do things throughout the year.

Every day you wake up you should be making resolutions for what you want to accomplish that day and how you want to be further along than the day before.

Another problem many run into as they make their resolutions is there is nothing to define them.  People say “I am going to be happier,”  or “I’m going to get in shape,” but they don’t make any plans for how they are going to do either of those things.  So if you’re wondering what happened to those promises you made yourself then start today.  It doesn’t have to be a new year to start resolutions.

Come up with clear and concise things.  For instance instead of saying “I’m going to be happier,” make a list of things that make you really happy.  Maybe it’s a hobby you haven’t pursued in a long time. If you want to get fit, start shopping better, cut out junk food, and start working out, even if it’s in your home.  There are a million youtube videos of different workouts.

Start today, don’t only make goals on new years.  Make them every day of the year, and constantly review them and see what adjustments you need to make.

Ignite The Fire

What makes you absolutely come alive?  Think about it for a minute.

Maybe it’s something you haven’t done in a really long time, maybe someone told you it was dumb so you stopped, maybe you think it’s silly, maybe you failed at it once.

Here’s the deal though.  That one thing that burns in your heart and makes you come alive is the match that others need in order to come alive.

See, we think that pursuing our passion is only about us.  And while it is important to us, it’s also important to others.  But we tend to only see those who think negativity towards what we want to do.  But for every negative person there are two who need our passion, our excitement, and our example to ignite themselves.

We are like lighters, igniting others.   One match can set a huge fire off.  So go after what you makes you come alive, ignite your own future, and that of others.

What We Give

How is our life measured?  Is it by what we receive?  By how much we earn?  How many things we acquire?  How impressive our resume and portfolio is?

Or is it more than these things.

It’s really easy (especially in this day and age) to get caught up in numbers.  I know I’ve been guilty of it before.

We miss out on opportunities to really hang out with family or friends because we think that if we just invest a little more time and make that bonus, or get to x amount of followers, then we will make it big.

But in the process we miss out on so many more important things.

There’s nothing wrong with numbers to a certain extent, but when they start to take priority it can lead us down a dangerous road.  We can’t lose ourselves for the sake of numbers, esteem, or other’s opinions.

How many “stars” have we seen buy into this mentality and have a devastating crash.  It’s because somewhere along the way the real meaning and importance of things takes a back seat to the numbers.

So whatever you are striving for, go after it with all your heart, but don’t lose the core of who you are and don’t forget the why behind what you are doing.

View From The Top

Good things don’t come to those who wait.  Good things come to those who fight like crazy, work their butt off, and never ever give up.

Climbing a mountain is a struggle.  The air gets thinner the higher you go, your breathing gets heavier, and your legs ache more with every step.  Sweat pours from your body regardless of how cold the temperature is.

It is painstakingly hard.

But getting to the to.  It’s truly breath-taking.  To be above the clouds, above the tree line, to see what few others have seen, and to experience that rush of completion is quite something.

Nothing comes close to it.

When we are climbing we don’t think it will be worth it. We remember people telling us about the grandeur of the mountain, but they didn’t tell us about the pain and the aches, and the exploding lungs.

But why didn’t they?  Because what they came away with wasn’t the pain, but the remembrance of the view.

Keep that in mind when you are climbing.  No amount of reasoning in your mind can make the pain you feel any better. But if you focus on what you are going to end up seeing and focus on the thrill of completing your task, that thought, and that hope will keep you going.  It will keep your body pushing forward.

Don’t ever give up.