James Hauenstein's Blog, page 21
May 29, 2021
Twin Eidolons - Chapter 1
My story begins like all stories of this nature. In a new home. Recently, my Grandma's eccentric, much younger stepbrother had died and willed his house to my mother who gave it to me because she didn't want to leave the home she has lived in for the past 40 years. Jean-Claude was maybe 102 or 3 when he died. My mother doesn't know for sure because in those days in Haiti, where he was born, a child's birth isn't registered until one of the parents informs a government census official. She says that home births are very common and sometimes a child could be registered right before they start school. Jean-Claude never married and never worked a day in his life. Family folklore has it that his parents were eccentric too! Eccentrically rich. Somehow escaping the country's military government with millions in U.S. currency made on the backs of other Haitians from the sugar and coffee fields. That part of the will my mother decided to hold onto. The millions of dollars. She felt it would corrupt our family's love for one another. Still my husband was thrilled to death inheriting a home already paid off and we could stop wasting his money on renting an apartment. My mother told me that I would never have to worry about paying property, state, or federal taxes because she would take care of it while she was still alive and eventually I would inherent a trust fund she was setting up in my name. So that was one less thing to worry about. I was happy because it came with 5 acres of land, mostly covered in trees, but I knew, if my husband and I put ours minds to it we could clear a large enough area for our expectant baby boy to have a place to play around in as he grew up. On the first Saturday of May, my husband, my mom, and myself, took off on a two hour drive for the country. We were all giddy to see the three story mansion I would be raising my child in.
We had only seen yellowing old photographs of the estate before that day and the idea of living the life of Downton Abby from TV quickly exploded into disappointment as it was almost impossible for my husband to get the front gate open, to drive up to the house. The mansion and the surrounding grounds were in very bad shape. Years of neglect from a 102 year old recluse who wouldn't let a soul near his home while alive had weathered the building and let the weeds and wild brush take over the yard.
My mother said she would have workers out tomorrow morning painting the inside and outside of the house. Electricians and plumbers making sure everything was working properly. With landscapers and gardeners fixing up the grounds. "If all goes well," she said. "You could be moving in by the end of the month." Pretty optimistic I felt. But still, we all agreed to go inside and see if any of the furnishings and other household items were salvageable. Before going up the steps to the front door my mother surprised my husband and me by saying, "The lawyer for Jean-Claude's estate, who gave me the keys yesterday, said there would be an envelope waiting for us on a small table just inside the door." She paused, then asked herself out loud, "I wonder what that could be about?" I saw a gleam in my husband's eyes and I knew he was hoping it was cash. I was hoping it might be a personal letter for my mom giving her well wishes. But my mother kept ominously saying to herself as we entered, "I wonder what it could be?" She found the envelope, opened it, and let out a little shriek. I picked up the the letter from the floor to see what had frightened her. It read, "Please take care of Widelene and Mirlande for me. Jean-Claude." My mother looked to be in shock. "Mom. Mom!" I had to shout to get her attention. "Who are these people?" I asked. "They were Jean-Claude's twin sisters. They were killed inside the house by a Haitian man who said your great grandfather stole all his money." She continued with tears in her eyes. "Your great grandfather shot and killed him, but it was too late to help the girls!"
To Be Continued.......
This is,A Fictitious Story And All Characters Are From The Imagination Of The WriterJim Hauenstein And, “The ghosts of things that never happened are worse than the ghosts of things that did.”
- L.M. Montgomery - That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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I'll Be Seeing You! Eidolon means Ghost by the way.
We had only seen yellowing old photographs of the estate before that day and the idea of living the life of Downton Abby from TV quickly exploded into disappointment as it was almost impossible for my husband to get the front gate open, to drive up to the house. The mansion and the surrounding grounds were in very bad shape. Years of neglect from a 102 year old recluse who wouldn't let a soul near his home while alive had weathered the building and let the weeds and wild brush take over the yard.
My mother said she would have workers out tomorrow morning painting the inside and outside of the house. Electricians and plumbers making sure everything was working properly. With landscapers and gardeners fixing up the grounds. "If all goes well," she said. "You could be moving in by the end of the month." Pretty optimistic I felt. But still, we all agreed to go inside and see if any of the furnishings and other household items were salvageable. Before going up the steps to the front door my mother surprised my husband and me by saying, "The lawyer for Jean-Claude's estate, who gave me the keys yesterday, said there would be an envelope waiting for us on a small table just inside the door." She paused, then asked herself out loud, "I wonder what that could be about?" I saw a gleam in my husband's eyes and I knew he was hoping it was cash. I was hoping it might be a personal letter for my mom giving her well wishes. But my mother kept ominously saying to herself as we entered, "I wonder what it could be?" She found the envelope, opened it, and let out a little shriek. I picked up the the letter from the floor to see what had frightened her. It read, "Please take care of Widelene and Mirlande for me. Jean-Claude." My mother looked to be in shock. "Mom. Mom!" I had to shout to get her attention. "Who are these people?" I asked. "They were Jean-Claude's twin sisters. They were killed inside the house by a Haitian man who said your great grandfather stole all his money." She continued with tears in her eyes. "Your great grandfather shot and killed him, but it was too late to help the girls!"

This is,A Fictitious Story And All Characters Are From The Imagination Of The WriterJim Hauenstein And, “The ghosts of things that never happened are worse than the ghosts of things that did.”
- L.M. Montgomery - That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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Thanks for reading.
Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You! Eidolon means Ghost by the way.
Published on May 29, 2021 11:21
May 28, 2021
Do I Look Cool Now
My consistent,lucid,annotator,Yaz 129,brought up the wonderful comparison of me,getting a little embarrassed,and a little anxious,when I spouted out,"It's my daughter's car!"in my story,"A Dynamic Father,"to that of being asked by my daughters to buy tampons for them.(Read "A Dynamic Father" and you'll see why.) Raising four daughters I have gone to the store to buy tampons on more then one occasion.It was about 10 years ago,that I swore I would never do it again when,at the time,I got in line,at the 15 items or less aisle. I plopped down a large 72 count bag of tampons.Trying to look cool in front of the attractive,twenty something checkout girl.She immediately looks me in the eyesand says,"That is really embarrassing. I can't even go to the checkout and buy tampons for myself in front of other people. I check out in the self serve aisle!"
Of course I have gone back since then,shamefully,with my tail between my legs,to buy tampons for my girls.Now,I buy smaller bags of tampons,hide them under other groceries,and I use the self serve check out aisle!
And man,
do I look cool now!
This is,The Proud Papa Of Four GirlsJim Hauenstein,
And,
“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”- Robert A. Heinlein - That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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I'll Be Seeing You!

Of course I have gone back since then,shamefully,with my tail between my legs,to buy tampons for my girls.Now,I buy smaller bags of tampons,hide them under other groceries,and I use the self serve check out aisle!
And man,
do I look cool now!
This is,The Proud Papa Of Four GirlsJim Hauenstein,
And,
“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”- Robert A. Heinlein - That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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I'll Be Seeing You!
Published on May 28, 2021 12:01
May 26, 2021
Why Oh Why
Summer is coming so I thought I would bring this story back for your reading pleasure.*****
Why oh why didn't anyone ever tell me about this little secret when I was drinking beer?You want to know how to drink beer all night on New Year's Eve,at aBirthday Party,or at your local
Bar,
and still be the designated driver?First a little background.What?
You can't wait to hear it? If I told you everything right away,I wouldn't be able to babble as much as I like to do.And what would the fun in that?
Our sober guru,Doctor Joe, as he was fondly called,was -Educated at Harvard with a troika of degrees, a BA, a JD, and an MBA. The late-Joseph Owades was a flat-out genius. With a PhD in biochemistry from Brooklyn Polytechnic Institute and an early job in the fermentation sciences department at Fleischmann's, (Fleischmann's Yeast) Owades probably knew more about fermentation and alcohol metabolism than perhaps any man who has ever lived. In fact, he has been called "The best brewer who's ever lived." He used that immense knowledge to eventually become a consultant for most of the progenitors of America's early craft brewing movement such as Anchor Brewing in San Francisco, New Amsterdam Brewing in New York, and the Boston Beer Company in, you guessed it, Boston. There he became good friends with Jim Koch, helped perfect Boston Lager, and passed on to Jim his little yeast secret. "One teaspoon of yeast per beer, right before you start drinking." You see, what Owades knew was that active dry yeast has an enzyme in it called alcohol dehydrogenase (ADH). Roughly put, ADH is able to break alcohol molecules down into their constituent parts of carbon, hydrogen, and oxygen. Which is the same thing that happens when your body metabolizes alcohol in its liver. Owades realized if you also have that enzyme in your stomach when the alcohol first hits it, the ADH will begin breaking it down before it gets into your bloodstream and, thus, your brain. "And it will mitigate – not eliminate – but mitigate the effects of alcohol!" By Aaron Goldfarb for Esquire
There you have it.Jim Koch,the guy you see on television all the time sellingSamuel Adams,has been drinking this way for years.
So you can too!
Put some yeast into some yogurt right before you drinkand maybe,just maybe,we will have one less drunk driver on the road thisYear.I had to quit drinking so there would be one less drunk driver!I'm Not Bitter!
This is,If You Decide To Carry White Powder Around With YouMake Sure The Bag Has A Fleischmann's Yeast Label On It,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
“I have absolutely no pleasure in the stimulants in which I sometimes so madly indulge. It has not been in the pursuit of pleasure that I have periled life and reputation and reason. It has been the desperate attempt to escape from torturing memories, from a sense of insupportable loneliness and a dread of some strange impending doom.”- Edgar Allan Poe - That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You!
Why oh why didn't anyone ever tell me about this little secret when I was drinking beer?You want to know how to drink beer all night on New Year's Eve,at aBirthday Party,or at your local
Bar,
and still be the designated driver?First a little background.What?
You can't wait to hear it? If I told you everything right away,I wouldn't be able to babble as much as I like to do.And what would the fun in that?
Our sober guru,Doctor Joe, as he was fondly called,was -Educated at Harvard with a troika of degrees, a BA, a JD, and an MBA. The late-Joseph Owades was a flat-out genius. With a PhD in biochemistry from Brooklyn Polytechnic Institute and an early job in the fermentation sciences department at Fleischmann's, (Fleischmann's Yeast) Owades probably knew more about fermentation and alcohol metabolism than perhaps any man who has ever lived. In fact, he has been called "The best brewer who's ever lived." He used that immense knowledge to eventually become a consultant for most of the progenitors of America's early craft brewing movement such as Anchor Brewing in San Francisco, New Amsterdam Brewing in New York, and the Boston Beer Company in, you guessed it, Boston. There he became good friends with Jim Koch, helped perfect Boston Lager, and passed on to Jim his little yeast secret. "One teaspoon of yeast per beer, right before you start drinking." You see, what Owades knew was that active dry yeast has an enzyme in it called alcohol dehydrogenase (ADH). Roughly put, ADH is able to break alcohol molecules down into their constituent parts of carbon, hydrogen, and oxygen. Which is the same thing that happens when your body metabolizes alcohol in its liver. Owades realized if you also have that enzyme in your stomach when the alcohol first hits it, the ADH will begin breaking it down before it gets into your bloodstream and, thus, your brain. "And it will mitigate – not eliminate – but mitigate the effects of alcohol!" By Aaron Goldfarb for Esquire

There you have it.Jim Koch,the guy you see on television all the time sellingSamuel Adams,has been drinking this way for years.
So you can too!
Put some yeast into some yogurt right before you drinkand maybe,just maybe,we will have one less drunk driver on the road thisYear.I had to quit drinking so there would be one less drunk driver!I'm Not Bitter!
This is,If You Decide To Carry White Powder Around With YouMake Sure The Bag Has A Fleischmann's Yeast Label On It,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
“I have absolutely no pleasure in the stimulants in which I sometimes so madly indulge. It has not been in the pursuit of pleasure that I have periled life and reputation and reason. It has been the desperate attempt to escape from torturing memories, from a sense of insupportable loneliness and a dread of some strange impending doom.”- Edgar Allan Poe - That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You!
Published on May 26, 2021 10:14
May 21, 2021
The Surgery
I want everyone to know that I am going to be away from writing on my blog for at leastFour or Fivedays as I recover from minor surgery I'm having tomorrow.Nothing too serious,but in my brain I'm thinking,anytime you go under the knife you have to hope that the person cutting into you wasn't told by their companion that they wanted a divorce that morning from the now crazy Surgeon!I know,it sounds like an episode from"Criminal Minds."Where the innocent victim is sliced into little pieces because theCrazed Surgeonis enraged because life has given them lemons.
This is,A Lot Of Stuff On This Blog For Your EntertainmentSo I Hope You Keep Coming Back Even Though I Will Be AwayJim Hauenstein
And,
“Cutting out bad habits is far more effective than cutting out organs.”
- Herbert M. Shelton -
That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You!

And,
“Cutting out bad habits is far more effective than cutting out organs.”
- Herbert M. Shelton -
That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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Sign up as a Follower,or leave a Comment.If it's worthy enough,I'll answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You!
Published on May 21, 2021 09:57
May 19, 2021
An Adventure In Hiking
On Mother's Day,which is always on a Sunday,became alife and deathsituation for me,two of my daughters,and one of my grandchildren.Sunday is the day my second oldest daughter,her son,and I go to a differentSouthern California Trailsto go hiking.This time my youngest daughter decided she would accompany us.Looking on theAll Trails website,we decided to try theTenaja Falls Trail.
It has everything you want.Kid Friendly,has aRiver,beautiful
Views,a
Waterfall,andWildlife.
The website states;"Tenaja Falls Trail is a 4.5 mile lightly trafficked out and back trail located near Lake Elsinore, CA that features a waterfall and is rated as moderate. The trail is primarily used for hiking and walking and is accessible year-round." It also states that the elevation is:"Up & Down 416 feet."
It is very pretty,very rugged,very up & down.Only saw one rattlesnake,no mountain lions,but I really didn't comprehend
"Out & Back"portion of the description!It is 4.5 miles in,4.5 miles out,on the same rugged mountainous trail.You would be surprised how far 416 feet is when you have to climb itup & downseven or eight times!
This is,Soaking My Legs In Epson Salt Still Ten Days Later,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
“Thousands of tired, nerve-shaken, over-civilized people are beginning to find out that going to the mountains is going home; that wildness is a necessity” - John Muir - That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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I'll Be Seeing You!

Views,a
Waterfall,andWildlife.


"Out & Back"portion of the description!It is 4.5 miles in,4.5 miles out,on the same rugged mountainous trail.You would be surprised how far 416 feet is when you have to climb itup & downseven or eight times!
This is,Soaking My Legs In Epson Salt Still Ten Days Later,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
“Thousands of tired, nerve-shaken, over-civilized people are beginning to find out that going to the mountains is going home; that wildness is a necessity” - John Muir - That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You!
Published on May 19, 2021 10:56
May 17, 2021
Spending My Time The Right Way
One of myGrandchildrenstayed over this past weekendand if you have read my blog over these last five years you would know that I always say,"Family comes first."So instead of spending time on the computer,I spent my time with him.We had a really good time until he wanted to playMonotony,or I meanMonopoly.We still had a good time playing but I hateMonopolyever since I was a wee little child.It is the one board game that has been in every home I ever lived inand I have never bought one of them!
I know Baby Yoda is really popular right nowbut even he can't use hisJedi Powerson me so I like this game.But,I will play any board game with any of myChildren & Grandchildrenbecause it keeps them away from staring at theirCellphones,Computer Screens,or playing endlessly on theirGame Consoles!If Silicon Valley Execs Are Raising Their Kids Tech-Freeand they are making millions by getting the average person hooked on their tech,there something must be wrong with it.Yeah,It's calledADDICTION! This is,I Would Be Scrolling On My Phone Right NowWhile Typing On My ComputerBut My Phone Needed To Be ChargedJim Hauenstein And, I Am Not Addicted!
"Silicon Valley is no longer the valley of innovators who solve problems, it has turned into the valley of resourceful stupidity. They are a bunch of people wasting resources on creating products that do nothing more than fuel the predominant neurosis of consumerism."
- Abhijit Naskar -
That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You!

I know Baby Yoda is really popular right nowbut even he can't use hisJedi Powerson me so I like this game.But,I will play any board game with any of myChildren & Grandchildrenbecause it keeps them away from staring at theirCellphones,Computer Screens,or playing endlessly on theirGame Consoles!If Silicon Valley Execs Are Raising Their Kids Tech-Freeand they are making millions by getting the average person hooked on their tech,there something must be wrong with it.Yeah,It's calledADDICTION! This is,I Would Be Scrolling On My Phone Right NowWhile Typing On My ComputerBut My Phone Needed To Be ChargedJim Hauenstein And, I Am Not Addicted!
"Silicon Valley is no longer the valley of innovators who solve problems, it has turned into the valley of resourceful stupidity. They are a bunch of people wasting resources on creating products that do nothing more than fuel the predominant neurosis of consumerism."
- Abhijit Naskar -
That is my story and I am sticking to it!
Like what you are reading?
Sign up as a Follower,or leave a Comment.If it's worthy enough,I'll answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You!
Published on May 17, 2021 12:23
May 14, 2021
A Few Observations
During the early years of the internet the most common word for people to use as their password was, password. Now that most companies say you need to use at least one capitalized letter, at least use one number, and at least one symbol, it seems most people are now capitalizing the letter P, using the number 1, and exclamation point as their symbol! (I have my sources!)
Father Gregory Boyle, founder of Homeboy Industries, is one of my latest heroes. Everything I have heard or read says he is a good human being. I also thing he has a healthy attitude about God."God protects me from nothing, but sustains me in everything." Kareem Abdul-Jabbar has written four Mycroft and Sherlock Holmes books for your reading pleasure. Phil Plait is still the Bad Astronomy. With the COVID-19 pandemic, my Doctor's and Dentist's office no longer offer magazines in their waiting rooms. This has hit the print media hard. Which ones will survive to print another day? YouTube decided to turn off "Comments" on some of my songs that I put up. They say it could be detrimental to children. Unfortunately they turned it off for my song about nature and one about love. The songs about Sex and Drugs and Rock n' Roll they left alone.
There are so many apps out there today for buying Bitcoin and Stocks that I no longer have to pay an agent a commission. I just use a crystal ball to choose which ones I am going to buy!
This is,Buying Low And Selling High Is My MottoJim Hauenstein
And,
“October: This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.”
- Mark Twain -
That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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I'll Be Seeing You!
Father Gregory Boyle, founder of Homeboy Industries, is one of my latest heroes. Everything I have heard or read says he is a good human being. I also thing he has a healthy attitude about God."God protects me from nothing, but sustains me in everything." Kareem Abdul-Jabbar has written four Mycroft and Sherlock Holmes books for your reading pleasure. Phil Plait is still the Bad Astronomy. With the COVID-19 pandemic, my Doctor's and Dentist's office no longer offer magazines in their waiting rooms. This has hit the print media hard. Which ones will survive to print another day? YouTube decided to turn off "Comments" on some of my songs that I put up. They say it could be detrimental to children. Unfortunately they turned it off for my song about nature and one about love. The songs about Sex and Drugs and Rock n' Roll they left alone.
There are so many apps out there today for buying Bitcoin and Stocks that I no longer have to pay an agent a commission. I just use a crystal ball to choose which ones I am going to buy!

And,
“October: This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.”
- Mark Twain -
That is my story and I am sticking to it!
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Thanks for reading.
Be Kind To Everyone.
I'll Be Seeing You!
Published on May 14, 2021 09:10
May 12, 2021
Stories Can Come To Life
I wanted to tell you a tale today about one of my many adventures across the globe from years gone by. How I sailed the Seven Seas during the 1990s in my
Gemini Legacy Catamaran. At a time when modern
Pirates
out gun the
Maritime Sailor. How in the 1980s I fought offPygmy Headhunterson the
Isles Of The Comoros. Found a never discovered Fourteenth Mayan Crystal Skull
in the mountain hills north of the
City Of Lamboglia Puerto Ricoin 2002.Danced withPrincess Stephanie, Countess Of Polignac, while we waited for
Y2K
to begin.How I backed up theMagic Man,Don Majkowski
in 1989,for the
Green Bay Packers.Play on the same stage as
Jimmy Hendricks & Cheap Trick.Well,that is a true story because I played at the same club inMilwaukee, Wisconsinas they did called The Stone Toad .Just not at the same time.
But I can't possibly tell you which exciting new adventure I'm about to embark on today because that would ruin all future tales I've yet to write.I can tell you one thing.Charactersin tales do come to lifeand are as real as your imagination lets them become.And as long as myImaginary Friend Jason
keeps challenging me to arm wrestling matches,I believe he is aliveand kicking. Just like always![image error] This is, Jason Is Really RealAnd I Just Beat Him At Arm Wrestling, Jim Hauenstein,
And,
"Come on, Rory! It isn't rocket science, it's just quantum physics!"
- Steven Moffat -
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Published on May 12, 2021 10:58
May 10, 2021
The Rock Star Syndrome
In a PostI wrote in 2016calledI'm Back,I talked about my"Glory Days"of playing inRock Bandswith some of my friends from years gone by.I talked about when I was visiting my family inWisconsinand was invited byThe ProfessorfromBowie State University in Maryland,to participate in an impromptu jam sessionbut was unable to go.This got me to thinking about how it felt to be on stage in front of a crowd.Which I call
The Rock Star Syndrome.I thought about the last time I felt like aRock Star.During the 1990's I owned season tickets to theSan Diego Chargersfootball team.On one occasion I took my wife to a game.Before the game started,out in the parking lotand inside the concourse,
The Marine Corps fromCamp Pendleton were outside the stadium demonstrating equipmentand showing off some of their larger vehicles of war.
Just inside the entrance to the stadium,in the common area,there stood aTank.
It was guarded by five or sixMarinesand they recognized me from working atCamp Pendleton.
They started yelling,"Hey, there's Jim. Hi Jim!"They all wavedand yelledand I waved back to them.With the biggest smile on my face.
All around the area people were staring at me wondering who I was.Was I a celebrity,a person of prominence,or maybe aRock Star?It was crowded too!People stared at meand talked about me all the while I was walking to my seat.It was the last time that I felt like aRock Star!My wife loved it too!
Thank youMarines.
This is,I Wouldn't Tell You This Story If It Wasn't True,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
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I'll Be Seeing You!
The Rock Star Syndrome.I thought about the last time I felt like aRock Star.During the 1990's I owned season tickets to theSan Diego Chargersfootball team.On one occasion I took my wife to a game.Before the game started,out in the parking lotand inside the concourse,
The Marine Corps fromCamp Pendleton were outside the stadium demonstrating equipmentand showing off some of their larger vehicles of war.


They started yelling,"Hey, there's Jim. Hi Jim!"They all wavedand yelledand I waved back to them.With the biggest smile on my face.
All around the area people were staring at me wondering who I was.Was I a celebrity,a person of prominence,or maybe aRock Star?It was crowded too!People stared at meand talked about me all the while I was walking to my seat.It was the last time that I felt like aRock Star!My wife loved it too!
Thank youMarines.
This is,I Wouldn't Tell You This Story If It Wasn't True,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
"Having rock-star problems may be the closest I ever get to being an actual rock star." - Cassandra Clare, -
That is my story and I am sticking to it!Like what you are reading?
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I'll Be Seeing You!
Published on May 10, 2021 08:45
May 9, 2021
Happy Mother's Day
Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms in the world.I will write again tomorrow.
Published on May 09, 2021 13:17