Chris Rodell's Blog, page 64
February 8, 2016
Great big flags & other Super Bowl thoughts
(773 words)
I thought today I’d write about the patriotic desecration we all enjoy every Super Bowl, but I’d rather not today on what feels like our national hangover.
But one of these days I’m going to dig into that one. See, I’m fascinated by the construction, care and storage of those mega-flags they use at big sporting events.
The American Legion details very explicit rules about
I thought today I’d write about the patriotic desecration we all enjoy every Super Bowl, but I’d rather not today on what feels like our national hangover.
But one of these days I’m going to dig into that one. See, I’m fascinated by the construction, care and storage of those mega-flags they use at big sporting events.
The American Legion details very explicit rules about
February 5, 2016
Mom thinks I work in hardware store (plus blog halftime Super Bowl prediction)
(450/210/355 words)
I'm starting to think the only reason God wants my Mom to live with dementia so long is He doesn’t ever want me to ever run low on blog material.
That’s how I wound up with a make-believe job down at the local hardware store.
Hours are good, pay’s decent and I like all the make-believe people with whom I work.
Some of the make-believe customers can be difficult, but
I'm starting to think the only reason God wants my Mom to live with dementia so long is He doesn’t ever want me to ever run low on blog material.
That’s how I wound up with a make-believe job down at the local hardware store.
Hours are good, pay’s decent and I like all the make-believe people with whom I work.
Some of the make-believe customers can be difficult, but
February 4, 2016
I'm gonna try & swear on KDKA tonight
(485 words)
I’m going to make this brief: I’ll be on 1020 KDKA-AM radio tonight with John McIntire and I’m going to try and swear.
I want to do something shocking, something that’ll earn a jolt of attention, something that generates news.
And because it is radio, merely dropping my pants won’t matter.
I plan on doing that, too, but strictly for comfort.
I should write at least one book
I’m going to make this brief: I’ll be on 1020 KDKA-AM radio tonight with John McIntire and I’m going to try and swear.
I want to do something shocking, something that’ll earn a jolt of attention, something that generates news.
And because it is radio, merely dropping my pants won’t matter.
I plan on doing that, too, but strictly for comfort.
I should write at least one book
February 3, 2016
O.J., me & National Enquirer
(1,162words)
It’s the wildest sort of speculation for me to imagine there’s a lot of office watercolor talk about “The People vs. O.J. Simpson” when I don’t even know if offices even have watercoolers anymore.
Heck, for all I know watercolors may have been replaced by pot dispensaries where harried workers stand around and say things like “Dude” and “Chill.”
See, it’s been a long time
It’s the wildest sort of speculation for me to imagine there’s a lot of office watercolor talk about “The People vs. O.J. Simpson” when I don’t even know if offices even have watercoolers anymore.
Heck, for all I know watercolors may have been replaced by pot dispensaries where harried workers stand around and say things like “Dude” and “Chill.”
See, it’s been a long time
February 2, 2016
Latrobe Bulletin features me & "Last Baby Boomer"
I was very pleased to learn this weekend that in the eyes of the local paper, I’m a proper noun. See I figured I was an adjective. I figured I was “Local Author.”
But when the Latrobe Bulletin published its page 1 feature about me and my book, the headline read: “Chris Rodell’s debut novel is deathbed satire.”
That means, at least in the eyes of Bulletin editors, I’m right up there with
But when the Latrobe Bulletin published its page 1 feature about me and my book, the headline read: “Chris Rodell’s debut novel is deathbed satire.”
That means, at least in the eyes of Bulletin editors, I’m right up there with
February 1, 2016
Overcoming in-flight panic attacks
(710 words)
Flying commercial always makes me feel like a foot must feel when it’s getting shoved into a bowling shoe.
I tweeted that last week and was immediately corrected by Jim H., one of my old Nashville Banner buddies, who said I was being too kind.
A more accurate description, he said, would be it feels like a right foot getting crammed into some left shoe with somebody else’s
Flying commercial always makes me feel like a foot must feel when it’s getting shoved into a bowling shoe.
I tweeted that last week and was immediately corrected by Jim H., one of my old Nashville Banner buddies, who said I was being too kind.
A more accurate description, he said, would be it feels like a right foot getting crammed into some left shoe with somebody else’s
January 31, 2016
RRS: What I think about when the dog and I get into a staring contest
No cogent reason for re-posting this. But it’s got, I think, some funny musings and seemed to fall through the cracks. And it has nothing to do with the Super Bowl so it for now is perfect.
(719 words)
I sometimes find myself staring at the dog and wondering how I’d lok with his nose and how he’d look with mine. And I wonder if he’s thinking the same thing.
I doubt it. I think when
(719 words)
I sometimes find myself staring at the dog and wondering how I’d lok with his nose and how he’d look with mine. And I wonder if he’s thinking the same thing.
I doubt it. I think when
January 30, 2016
Hello to more than 300 new twitter followers!
My 8days2amish twitter followers jumped from 364 on Jan. 20 to 699. Very nice. It was all thanks to an amazon.com giveaway promo for my new satiric novel “The Last Baby Boomer.” I’m hoping it becomes a trend. I’m very proud of the originality of my tweets and think them deserving of a wide readership. But what do I know? Here. You decide . . .
• Our greatest frustrations stem from when
• Our greatest frustrations stem from when
January 29, 2016
"Use All the Crayons!" hits the road: Omaha
(792 words)
I’d been standing smack dab in the middle of Aksarben, Nebraska, when I was informed of why Aksarben, Nebraska, was bound to become one of my favorite palindromes.
Aksarben is Nebraska spelled backwards!
I marvel that at one time way back in 1895 there was a man or woman so silver-tongue persuasive he or she was able to convince community leaders that spelling Nebraska
I’d been standing smack dab in the middle of Aksarben, Nebraska, when I was informed of why Aksarben, Nebraska, was bound to become one of my favorite palindromes.
Aksarben is Nebraska spelled backwards!
I marvel that at one time way back in 1895 there was a man or woman so silver-tongue persuasive he or she was able to convince community leaders that spelling Nebraska
January 28, 2016
My near-fatal finger splinter
(743 words)
I gave a doctor the finger and Obamacare paid for it!
I had a life-threatening splinter deep in my right hand’s middle finger; the Digitus Me’dius, to you fans of old Roadrunner cartoons.
I wish I could contend it was a steel splinter from an ax-wielding mishap or a fragment from a bullet I tried to catch between my fingers.
But, no, the wound was wicker in origin.
Yes, the
I gave a doctor the finger and Obamacare paid for it!
I had a life-threatening splinter deep in my right hand’s middle finger; the Digitus Me’dius, to you fans of old Roadrunner cartoons.
I wish I could contend it was a steel splinter from an ax-wielding mishap or a fragment from a bullet I tried to catch between my fingers.
But, no, the wound was wicker in origin.
Yes, the
