C. Henry Martens's Blog, page 7
January 12, 2018
Inevitable Extinction Theory
©2018 C. Henry Martens
The first glimmers of this idea started rolling around in my head as a high school student, several years… decades, ago. The idea that the human race is destined to become extinct. I have finally arrived at a place where I think I can put down the relevant points after years of speculative thought.
What prompts this article, the culmination of this idea of Inevitable Extinction regarding the species Homo Sapiens, is a small side note published in the latest National Geographic Magazine, the special issue of January 2017… titled “Gender Revolution”. The tiny note to the side of the page states that male and female children get different nutritional benefit from their Mother’s breast milk… based on how financially stable the family is.
Why would that apply to humankind being poised on the knife’s edge of extinction?
Well, let’s start at the beginning.
First off, it is necessary to understand that humans are dangerous, and they make mistakes as a group that they would not make as individuals. One of the mistakes bred into us is a societal, tribal, species related instinct to survive. The idea that the more of our particular *brand* there are, the better off those of our brand are going to be.
Have you ever noticed the intensity of any group in soliciting an “other” over to the *side* of the group? The effort made to absorb the unlike individual, into the cohesiveness of the tribe? It doesn’t matter if it is religion, or a football team, or a political party, any set of individuals that lose their independence, even two that come to believe they have a best way, will try to convince others that they should join.
So human beings have an urge to gather together in numbers.
Now this affinity for being alike, in groups, may have evolved from a necessity to survive the savanna of long ago Africa, us against the savage world… but nevertheless it is still with us today. A carry-over from our need to cooperate to feed and protect ourselves, and our success as a species.
This urge to survive as a group, a species, is integral to the idea of inevitable extinction.
The second leg of the theory is gender dominance. I’m not speaking of one gender dominating another by abuse of one kind or another, but that one gender can be more numerous than the other.
Did you know that it is possible to influence gender in your offspring? Not only is it possible, but it occurs naturally in populations. The result is a natural form of birth control, and beneficial to the population under most circumstances.
The influence that skews gender birth rates one way or the other is most often food. Really? Well… yes. Food is essential to life, and what you eat sets up the chemistry of your body. Depending on what kinds of nutrients you ingest, your diet affects everything from the content of your gut biome to how acidic or basic the rest of your body is. That, the acidity of your body, affects the likelihood of which gender of sperm fertilizes the ovum. It shouldn’t surprise many people that the male sperm is more vigorous and faster than the female sperm, and the female sperm is longer lasting. In a more acid environment, one gender of sperm has an advantage, in a base environment, the other does.
But what has this got to do with extinction? Well, what gender survives to reproduce has a great degree of impact on future population. More females, more children… fewer females, fewer children. Before the rise of medical intervention this was critical, and our only evolutionary birth control.
Population impacts future food supply. Have you ever heard anyone say, “The best predictor of future performance is past performance”? Well, it is true, not only in the stock market but also in natural environment food supply. The earth has natural cycles. We evolved to take advantage of the times of plenty, as well as the lean times.
In a natural environment with no medical intervention, more female children as a percentage are born in times of plenty. It follows that in lean times more male children are born. But gender percentages are skewed by nutrition in other ways. In a hunter-gatherer society that is dependant on protein as the major source of sustenance, male numbers are higher and in societies depending on plants, carbohydrates and sugars, females are more likely.
This is how we evolved.
Hunting societies needed hunters. In ancient far north hunting societies where the main source of nutrition was stored fat and frozen or dried fish, more male children were born. Warmer climes and agriculture skews the numbers the other way. In times of plenty, with lots of food to eat, we are evolved to have more female children. It is a natural cycle.
So, again, how does this relate to extinction?
Have you ever heard of overgrazing?
But before I get to that, let’s visit that National Geographic blurb one more time. They said that male and female children get different nutrients from breast milk, depending on how financially secure the woman is that is feeding them. In wealthy families, the boys get richer milk, and in poorer families, the females receive the richer milk. Do you see the correlation? This all goes back to hunter-gatherer evolution. Wealthier people have more, and richer, protein sources, and male children are encouraged to survive and thrive. Poor people tend to eat more carbs, and female children tend to dominate the numbers.
The cycle doesn’t have to be noticeable to skew the outcome. A few more women, rather than men… who’s going to worry about that? A lot of people might even applaud having fewer men around.
Now I could get into the way our social structures have evolved as a result of these natural phenomena, but sociology is another subject. However, there is certainly one result that is pertinent.
As our form of capitalism churns out ever more wealthy people at the top of the economic ladder, there are an ever-increasing number, an exponential number, of people at the bottom of the economy. The percentage of female births have been unnaturally high, correlating to the general financial condition of the lowest economic tier. What is considered substandard nutrition, a diet based on inexpensive foods like rice, pasta, and grains, is a bonanza of nutrition according to our evolutionary necessities… and the poor are not only gaining weight but are also producing more female children. Which feeds the cycle.
Couple the larger percentage of women with medical advances keeping children alive through their childbearing years, and we have a situation where population has grown well past a natural number of human beings on the planet.
Overgrazing. Think it can’t happen? There are nations in the world that are dependant on aid to feed their citizenry. And these are the good years. Between good climate and technologically advanced agricultural practices, the food supply is unnaturally abundant. As the soils are overworked and the aquifers drained, there will come a reckoning. The cycle of abundance will eventually decline into a cycle of shortages.
I have to wonder if nature set this all up as a way to weed out the animals that are inclined to overbreed and overgraze.
One point needs to be made. Women have all of the power in what eventually must transpire. Men cannot be depended on to limit population numbers. First, males of the species are far too arrogant. They see big numbers as a survival strategy. More people like me (in this case those who believe as I do), mean I am more likely to win. And men are unlikely to release that thinking easily. Short term thinkers, men.
Some recent numbers suggest the population is declining in industrialized nations. Governments are filling the gaps with immigrants, people who are much more likely to live in poverty and still produce large families. The cycle continues.
So these are the thoughts running through my head. I would like to think there is a solution, but babies are so cute, aren’t they?
If you follow the logic to its inevitable conclusion you may see that we are getting ever closer to a tipping point. Temporary over-abundance, poverty, biological predisposition to high percentages of female births leading to more female births, diminishing resources like good soil and easily acquired water… and the very human proclivity to put off what can be avoided until there is a crisis. Imagine the entire world as one big Easter Island…
Inevitable extinction
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To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
The first glimmers of this idea started rolling around in my head as a high school student, several years… decades, ago. The idea that the human race is destined to become extinct. I have finally arrived at a place where I think I can put down the relevant points after years of speculative thought.
What prompts this article, the culmination of this idea of Inevitable Extinction regarding the species Homo Sapiens, is a small side note published in the latest National Geographic Magazine, the special issue of January 2017… titled “Gender Revolution”. The tiny note to the side of the page states that male and female children get different nutritional benefit from their Mother’s breast milk… based on how financially stable the family is.
Why would that apply to humankind being poised on the knife’s edge of extinction?
Well, let’s start at the beginning.
First off, it is necessary to understand that humans are dangerous, and they make mistakes as a group that they would not make as individuals. One of the mistakes bred into us is a societal, tribal, species related instinct to survive. The idea that the more of our particular *brand* there are, the better off those of our brand are going to be.
Have you ever noticed the intensity of any group in soliciting an “other” over to the *side* of the group? The effort made to absorb the unlike individual, into the cohesiveness of the tribe? It doesn’t matter if it is religion, or a football team, or a political party, any set of individuals that lose their independence, even two that come to believe they have a best way, will try to convince others that they should join.
So human beings have an urge to gather together in numbers.
Now this affinity for being alike, in groups, may have evolved from a necessity to survive the savanna of long ago Africa, us against the savage world… but nevertheless it is still with us today. A carry-over from our need to cooperate to feed and protect ourselves, and our success as a species.
This urge to survive as a group, a species, is integral to the idea of inevitable extinction.
The second leg of the theory is gender dominance. I’m not speaking of one gender dominating another by abuse of one kind or another, but that one gender can be more numerous than the other.
Did you know that it is possible to influence gender in your offspring? Not only is it possible, but it occurs naturally in populations. The result is a natural form of birth control, and beneficial to the population under most circumstances.
The influence that skews gender birth rates one way or the other is most often food. Really? Well… yes. Food is essential to life, and what you eat sets up the chemistry of your body. Depending on what kinds of nutrients you ingest, your diet affects everything from the content of your gut biome to how acidic or basic the rest of your body is. That, the acidity of your body, affects the likelihood of which gender of sperm fertilizes the ovum. It shouldn’t surprise many people that the male sperm is more vigorous and faster than the female sperm, and the female sperm is longer lasting. In a more acid environment, one gender of sperm has an advantage, in a base environment, the other does.
But what has this got to do with extinction? Well, what gender survives to reproduce has a great degree of impact on future population. More females, more children… fewer females, fewer children. Before the rise of medical intervention this was critical, and our only evolutionary birth control.
Population impacts future food supply. Have you ever heard anyone say, “The best predictor of future performance is past performance”? Well, it is true, not only in the stock market but also in natural environment food supply. The earth has natural cycles. We evolved to take advantage of the times of plenty, as well as the lean times.
In a natural environment with no medical intervention, more female children as a percentage are born in times of plenty. It follows that in lean times more male children are born. But gender percentages are skewed by nutrition in other ways. In a hunter-gatherer society that is dependant on protein as the major source of sustenance, male numbers are higher and in societies depending on plants, carbohydrates and sugars, females are more likely.
This is how we evolved.
Hunting societies needed hunters. In ancient far north hunting societies where the main source of nutrition was stored fat and frozen or dried fish, more male children were born. Warmer climes and agriculture skews the numbers the other way. In times of plenty, with lots of food to eat, we are evolved to have more female children. It is a natural cycle.
So, again, how does this relate to extinction?
Have you ever heard of overgrazing?
But before I get to that, let’s visit that National Geographic blurb one more time. They said that male and female children get different nutrients from breast milk, depending on how financially secure the woman is that is feeding them. In wealthy families, the boys get richer milk, and in poorer families, the females receive the richer milk. Do you see the correlation? This all goes back to hunter-gatherer evolution. Wealthier people have more, and richer, protein sources, and male children are encouraged to survive and thrive. Poor people tend to eat more carbs, and female children tend to dominate the numbers.
The cycle doesn’t have to be noticeable to skew the outcome. A few more women, rather than men… who’s going to worry about that? A lot of people might even applaud having fewer men around.
Now I could get into the way our social structures have evolved as a result of these natural phenomena, but sociology is another subject. However, there is certainly one result that is pertinent.
As our form of capitalism churns out ever more wealthy people at the top of the economic ladder, there are an ever-increasing number, an exponential number, of people at the bottom of the economy. The percentage of female births have been unnaturally high, correlating to the general financial condition of the lowest economic tier. What is considered substandard nutrition, a diet based on inexpensive foods like rice, pasta, and grains, is a bonanza of nutrition according to our evolutionary necessities… and the poor are not only gaining weight but are also producing more female children. Which feeds the cycle.
Couple the larger percentage of women with medical advances keeping children alive through their childbearing years, and we have a situation where population has grown well past a natural number of human beings on the planet.
Overgrazing. Think it can’t happen? There are nations in the world that are dependant on aid to feed their citizenry. And these are the good years. Between good climate and technologically advanced agricultural practices, the food supply is unnaturally abundant. As the soils are overworked and the aquifers drained, there will come a reckoning. The cycle of abundance will eventually decline into a cycle of shortages.
I have to wonder if nature set this all up as a way to weed out the animals that are inclined to overbreed and overgraze.
One point needs to be made. Women have all of the power in what eventually must transpire. Men cannot be depended on to limit population numbers. First, males of the species are far too arrogant. They see big numbers as a survival strategy. More people like me (in this case those who believe as I do), mean I am more likely to win. And men are unlikely to release that thinking easily. Short term thinkers, men.
Some recent numbers suggest the population is declining in industrialized nations. Governments are filling the gaps with immigrants, people who are much more likely to live in poverty and still produce large families. The cycle continues.
So these are the thoughts running through my head. I would like to think there is a solution, but babies are so cute, aren’t they?
If you follow the logic to its inevitable conclusion you may see that we are getting ever closer to a tipping point. Temporary over-abundance, poverty, biological predisposition to high percentages of female births leading to more female births, diminishing resources like good soil and easily acquired water… and the very human proclivity to put off what can be avoided until there is a crisis. Imagine the entire world as one big Easter Island…
Inevitable extinction
Click here to receive the Apocalypse Observer Newsletter in your inbox
www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
January 5, 2018
Introspection and Seeking Reality
©2018 C. Henry Martens
I've been on a journey of discovery for about twelve years now. The trek didn't begin a dozen years ago, it started when I was born, but my conscious participation began with a couple of epiphanies resulting from life-changing events during the course of my life.
The reason I am writing this is in order to explain to family and friends why I think so differently from them and why I have become less reticent about voicing those differences. You see, I no longer believe that belonging to a tribe at the expense of reason or reality is a worthwhile priority.
I know that statement will insult some of you. It is as though I am saying I know something you don't. As though I have special knowledge that you haven't been lucky enough to acquire. That I am claiming some kind of superiority.
All I can say is that this is -my- journey, not yours, so there are going to be some differences. You know things I don't. Please allow me to have understandings independent of your own. So yes... I have acquired special knowledge, and in doing so, I have sought out and fallen into ways that affirm what I understand. Affirmation that goes beyond titles or grades or accolades... or that everyone in a tribe of like-minded thinkers accepts as agreeable.
Let's get a few things out of the way right away. I love my family and friends. I have always treasured, and will treasure my associations. But agreeing with everything others subscribe to in order to get along, or to “seem” to get along, has become increasingly problematic. We all do this, more or less, and I have found that these mutual admiration societies inhibit freedom of thought and independence in conclusions... leading to some very wrong perceptions. This is not to say that we don't all give each other leeway, but just that our leeway so often damps down our own conclusions about what is right, what we perceive as truths. We shut up to get along instead of embracing that diversity many people claim as valuable. In the end, this leads to avoiding uncomfortable truths. A tribe moves toward concensus as a unit, not toward reality.
One of the things that has to be said right away is that I may seem to have conclusions set in concrete, but my confidence is not in the decision reached... instead being more in the process of investigation that leads to a judgment. I practice “Active Open-Mindedness” even when I seem completely decided. Searching for that hidden nugget of information that will adjust my thinking, I seek new information out rather than going into automatic defense of a long-held conclusion mutually held by a group.
Active Open-Mindedness is difficult to exhibit, but this is why so many of my comments are couched in the form of questions.
This beginning to the article is becoming overly long, and I am realizing that many things must remain unsaid in order to keep it short. Please bear with me.
I think the first thing that gave me a real pause in my thought process, the start of my journey, began with a wall hanging. The saying on it... “It's not how much we have, but how much we enjoy that makes us happy.” One of those easily found platitudes that seem so benign and universal. The saying reminded me of how my mother was always trying to get me to try things, and how I resisted. I was also surprised at how I had changed over the years, enthusiastically embracing new experiences instead of avoiding them. As time went on, thinking more deeply, I discovered a greater substance behind the words. The idea that conclusions never need be uncompromising, resolute, or inflexible.
Journeys begin with a first step, even unintentional ones. I had no inkling that mine had begun.
The second step had to wait. Sudden monumental change a few years later overwhelmed me. Over the course of a year, and then the next two, major changes in fortunes and circumstances jarred my life with tremendous peaks and horrendous depressions. Such are the wages of success beyond expectation, and unforeseen calamity.
I was lost, my legs cut from under me. I could have easily given up. I came very close.
I had to find a way to survive.
Oddly, or fortuitously, another platitude insinuated itself into my consciousness. The words, “Don't believe everything you think” mulled about in my confused brain. At first, I discarded the words. On the surface they seemed so counter to reason. But they nagged at me, and in my present state of mind the words eventually began to provide support for an epiphany. Part of that “way to survive” would be to shed my old skin, my preconceptions, my former conclusions, and start again.
Two things combined to begin my education in independent thought. First, I began to investigate how brains work in making decisions, holding perceptions, and coming to conclusions... as well as how and why we avoid change. I began in an informal way, as I really had no blueprint for what I was seeking. Perhaps this open-ended hunt worked better than having a road planned in advance. I tend to think so.
The second part of the epiphany struck me unintentionally. In trying to get past my frustrations, I began to seek out changes and new activities. Without realizing the value in what I was doing, I had some unusual success that was independent of people's approval or acclaim. I had always been told I was talented, intelligent, or any of several compliments that tripped off of people's tongues in easily offered phrases. I had long ago come to distrust those too-easy comments. After all, if I was so damned smart why were so many people unwilling to see things as I did? I'd melded into the rest of society by denying anything that set me apart. And I had been content. But no more, because I was inspecting my perceptions much more critically, and finding that I could come to conclusions that were only set in sand. And that was a good thing.
In distrusting the compliments of people, I unconsciously sought out affirmation that didn't depend on human opinions. I wanted to know my abilities and test my perceptions of them on an unbiased field of battle.
Self-affirmation, independent of what other people think, is an epiphany in and of itself. I highly recommend it. Collected and put into a useful perspective, it is freeing. Everyone in the world should be so lucky as to find what I did.
Among other things, I started to play poker.
How does poker provide affirmation? Well, it doesn't unless you win. And I won. A LOT. Not any big tournaments, but a lot of little ones. Four tournaments in a row, and six out of eleven another time. In one setting with larger numbers, at least fifty other players, I won twice out of seven times and came close twice more. The odds against these results mean something. The results meant I have skills that are useful in life. And that my skills exceeded on average those I played against. Consistently. And several skills are involved.
But because of my prior acquiescence to group-think, to damping down my individual abilities in favor of belonging, I had been denying myself... and reality.
So... all things came together in a way that made me question everything I knew and everything I ever thought. By using Active Open-Mindedness, new experience is now automatically forced into a venue of inquiry, contemplation, and assigned values, but not end results. Conclusions are liquid and subject to better information. The farther I traveled into the rabbit hole, the more I became aware that I was alone, and other people, even those I love, are tied to their interpretations and reasoning by convention rather than reason. And they don't realize this very often. And even more rarely do they do anything about it.
I believe many people wonder about a lack of sympathy that they may perceive in me. I have certainly shocked people occasionally with my pronouncements. I want to assure you that I have no lack of sympathy, but I find it more useful to seek solutions than to dwell on memorializing problems. Empathy is a valuable tool to be used, but it is not an end result. Reality takes precedence.
I have become a fan of famous quotes, so Einstein's, “We can't solve problems using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them” seems particularly apropos. I have learned to look at issues from all sides, even inventing new sides to be explored.
We can't solve problems using wishful thinking, or desire, or polarized politics, or herd mentality, or consensus... except as a start to recognize there is a problem... but not to reach a best outcome. Best outcomes are independent of the tools used to find them and wishful thinking impedes realistic expectations.
I hope this explanation makes it easier to put up with me. I don't expect much understanding, as you are all walking your own paths and unlikely to step off to inspect another. But I want you all to know that I inspect yours and appreciate them more than you may know. I walk in your moccasins more than you might think. It's part of Active Open-Mindedness. But that does not mean I choose to react as you might expect. I would rather find solutions than dwell in automatic agreement or unnatural-to-me displays of sympathy.
Please understand that I don't claim to know more than anyone, or that I have any special information, or that I'm any more intelligent than anyone else. What I do claim is a more useful method to evaluate the same information we all have without reaching biased conclusions, because I am not invested in defending anything but accuracy. Often an accuracy that I would prefer were otherwise. I am imperfect, still working to shed the biases and preconceptions that impede my progress, but I've come a long way.
This practice I engage comes at a high cost on a personal level. People think I am argumentative, when I am really only wishing to point out inconsistencies and alternatives and hopeful that they will realize they are not required to have a conclusion set in stone.
The world is presently lost, and we all know it... and doing the same things over and over, expecting better outcomes... well, you know...
I have to try, and you thinking less of me is a small price to pay in the grand scheme.
The problem is that people have become invested in defending their positions instead of thinking about alternatives. The great value I've found in Active Open-Mindedness is that I have diminished my need for other people's validation, while increasing my appreciation for what other people have to offer. My dependency on approval isn't governed by acceptance by a tribe, by fitting in, by going along.
Some of you may find that frightening, either from your own perspective as someone trying to relate to me, or as someone imagining what it must be like to be so separate from a group. I don't see myself as separate although I did at one time. I embrace all sides, understanding that all sides have more goals in common than they do obstacles to divide them. I may walk a path between, but I am only warmed by the flames on both sides.
For those of you who see everything politically, I am Conservative but not a nebbish for the now radicalized GOP. This makes me a liberal to those Republicans that believe agreeing blindly with the new definitions of radio talk show entertainers is a test of loyalty to the party. On the other hand, those of you on the left might assume I am lost to the dark side because I question your own party-inspired conclusions. We are all more closely associated than our political beliefs would have us think. Too invested in defending quickly accepted positions than entertaining common ground.
One thing I have been surprised to learn is that people agree ninety (?) percent of the time on basic goals no matter which side speaks, and I would remind you of that. I am NOT your enemy when we agree on so much. If we focus on our disagreements over strategies to attain goals, to the exclusion of our commonalities in what we wish to achieve, we all lose. Again, I would also remind you that both sides of politics agree on ninety percent of what is good for our nation, that disagreements are most often in how we get there.
Herd mentality in politics always reminds me of Mark Twain, “Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”
A few final thoughts on independence-of-thought by way of explanation.
If you don't have a dog in the fight, you aren't required to have an opinion.
There are no perfect solutions in a real world. Sometimes the best outcome is to accept and support an imperfect solution. Better outcomes are fluid, as information and circumstances change. Humans rarely take time to recognize and value new information and circumstances before they get to the point of tribal agreement, so solutions face formidable obstacles.
I fully support and applaud the #metoo movement. There are valuable lessons being offered and learned. But the issue, as presented, is very one-sided and would benefit from more discussion rather than demanding acquiescence and “the only proper response is to shut-up” shaming. Women are not the only slighted parties, nor are they the only victims. And men are not the only perpetrators. Female abuse against men is far more common than society likes to admit. No sexual harassment is acceptable, but misunderstandings are natural and normal.
Men pay a high cost for the power women see as attractive, desiring it for themselves. If you don't recognize this, most likely it is because those costs appear so normal when paid by men.
Hypocrisy is rampant in both parties, and denied by all. Hypocrisy benefits no one except those that feed on division.
Rote learning, and thinking, enforces conclusions, and only repetitiously entertaining different ideas will break that cycle. Don't expect to understand the first time.
Compromise has been sold to the right as an evil, as losing. This idea has bled into the left. Yet compromise is the best way to reach agreement and move on to best outcomes for both sides.
The largely unrecognized root wedge driving the political parties apart is abortion, and there is an imperfect compromise that could be beneficial if the my-side-is-the-only-side-invested would consider the damage they are doing and weigh the costs. A reasonable compromise would open the floodgates to other issues being addressed.
Global warming is real, and caused by human activity, more or less. Any unbiased person can supply points to be made on both sides of the argument. But only people trapped in ideological denial refuse to weigh the evidence impartially, and the outcome is uncertain only in the degree of harm we will leave to the future.
Faith is comforting, but people change flat tires.
Human population is the root cause of every environmental problem. The earth is a self-cleaning and self-repairing system, but only if it isn't over-burdened.
Death is not something to waste your time on by memorializing mortality. The stone memorials of today will lose meaning to future generations. Better to put effort into learning from our mistakes and finding solutions than placing wreaths on unknown graves.
Wisdom is not wisdom if it is not shared.
And one final thing. I only recently found out there was a name for what I discovered and designed to help myself. My journey has been independent of any formal training or expert advice, or influence. But in discovering the term, “Active Open-Mindedness,” it seems to fit well with what I am practicing. That may change... as I am not tied to anything except exploring for the best explanations that I can find.
Click here to receive the Apocalypse Observer Newsletter in your inbox
www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
I've been on a journey of discovery for about twelve years now. The trek didn't begin a dozen years ago, it started when I was born, but my conscious participation began with a couple of epiphanies resulting from life-changing events during the course of my life.
The reason I am writing this is in order to explain to family and friends why I think so differently from them and why I have become less reticent about voicing those differences. You see, I no longer believe that belonging to a tribe at the expense of reason or reality is a worthwhile priority.
I know that statement will insult some of you. It is as though I am saying I know something you don't. As though I have special knowledge that you haven't been lucky enough to acquire. That I am claiming some kind of superiority.
All I can say is that this is -my- journey, not yours, so there are going to be some differences. You know things I don't. Please allow me to have understandings independent of your own. So yes... I have acquired special knowledge, and in doing so, I have sought out and fallen into ways that affirm what I understand. Affirmation that goes beyond titles or grades or accolades... or that everyone in a tribe of like-minded thinkers accepts as agreeable.
Let's get a few things out of the way right away. I love my family and friends. I have always treasured, and will treasure my associations. But agreeing with everything others subscribe to in order to get along, or to “seem” to get along, has become increasingly problematic. We all do this, more or less, and I have found that these mutual admiration societies inhibit freedom of thought and independence in conclusions... leading to some very wrong perceptions. This is not to say that we don't all give each other leeway, but just that our leeway so often damps down our own conclusions about what is right, what we perceive as truths. We shut up to get along instead of embracing that diversity many people claim as valuable. In the end, this leads to avoiding uncomfortable truths. A tribe moves toward concensus as a unit, not toward reality.
One of the things that has to be said right away is that I may seem to have conclusions set in concrete, but my confidence is not in the decision reached... instead being more in the process of investigation that leads to a judgment. I practice “Active Open-Mindedness” even when I seem completely decided. Searching for that hidden nugget of information that will adjust my thinking, I seek new information out rather than going into automatic defense of a long-held conclusion mutually held by a group.
Active Open-Mindedness is difficult to exhibit, but this is why so many of my comments are couched in the form of questions.
This beginning to the article is becoming overly long, and I am realizing that many things must remain unsaid in order to keep it short. Please bear with me.
I think the first thing that gave me a real pause in my thought process, the start of my journey, began with a wall hanging. The saying on it... “It's not how much we have, but how much we enjoy that makes us happy.” One of those easily found platitudes that seem so benign and universal. The saying reminded me of how my mother was always trying to get me to try things, and how I resisted. I was also surprised at how I had changed over the years, enthusiastically embracing new experiences instead of avoiding them. As time went on, thinking more deeply, I discovered a greater substance behind the words. The idea that conclusions never need be uncompromising, resolute, or inflexible.
Journeys begin with a first step, even unintentional ones. I had no inkling that mine had begun.
The second step had to wait. Sudden monumental change a few years later overwhelmed me. Over the course of a year, and then the next two, major changes in fortunes and circumstances jarred my life with tremendous peaks and horrendous depressions. Such are the wages of success beyond expectation, and unforeseen calamity.
I was lost, my legs cut from under me. I could have easily given up. I came very close.
I had to find a way to survive.
Oddly, or fortuitously, another platitude insinuated itself into my consciousness. The words, “Don't believe everything you think” mulled about in my confused brain. At first, I discarded the words. On the surface they seemed so counter to reason. But they nagged at me, and in my present state of mind the words eventually began to provide support for an epiphany. Part of that “way to survive” would be to shed my old skin, my preconceptions, my former conclusions, and start again.
Two things combined to begin my education in independent thought. First, I began to investigate how brains work in making decisions, holding perceptions, and coming to conclusions... as well as how and why we avoid change. I began in an informal way, as I really had no blueprint for what I was seeking. Perhaps this open-ended hunt worked better than having a road planned in advance. I tend to think so.
The second part of the epiphany struck me unintentionally. In trying to get past my frustrations, I began to seek out changes and new activities. Without realizing the value in what I was doing, I had some unusual success that was independent of people's approval or acclaim. I had always been told I was talented, intelligent, or any of several compliments that tripped off of people's tongues in easily offered phrases. I had long ago come to distrust those too-easy comments. After all, if I was so damned smart why were so many people unwilling to see things as I did? I'd melded into the rest of society by denying anything that set me apart. And I had been content. But no more, because I was inspecting my perceptions much more critically, and finding that I could come to conclusions that were only set in sand. And that was a good thing.
In distrusting the compliments of people, I unconsciously sought out affirmation that didn't depend on human opinions. I wanted to know my abilities and test my perceptions of them on an unbiased field of battle.
Self-affirmation, independent of what other people think, is an epiphany in and of itself. I highly recommend it. Collected and put into a useful perspective, it is freeing. Everyone in the world should be so lucky as to find what I did.
Among other things, I started to play poker.
How does poker provide affirmation? Well, it doesn't unless you win. And I won. A LOT. Not any big tournaments, but a lot of little ones. Four tournaments in a row, and six out of eleven another time. In one setting with larger numbers, at least fifty other players, I won twice out of seven times and came close twice more. The odds against these results mean something. The results meant I have skills that are useful in life. And that my skills exceeded on average those I played against. Consistently. And several skills are involved.
But because of my prior acquiescence to group-think, to damping down my individual abilities in favor of belonging, I had been denying myself... and reality.
So... all things came together in a way that made me question everything I knew and everything I ever thought. By using Active Open-Mindedness, new experience is now automatically forced into a venue of inquiry, contemplation, and assigned values, but not end results. Conclusions are liquid and subject to better information. The farther I traveled into the rabbit hole, the more I became aware that I was alone, and other people, even those I love, are tied to their interpretations and reasoning by convention rather than reason. And they don't realize this very often. And even more rarely do they do anything about it.
I believe many people wonder about a lack of sympathy that they may perceive in me. I have certainly shocked people occasionally with my pronouncements. I want to assure you that I have no lack of sympathy, but I find it more useful to seek solutions than to dwell on memorializing problems. Empathy is a valuable tool to be used, but it is not an end result. Reality takes precedence.
I have become a fan of famous quotes, so Einstein's, “We can't solve problems using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them” seems particularly apropos. I have learned to look at issues from all sides, even inventing new sides to be explored.
We can't solve problems using wishful thinking, or desire, or polarized politics, or herd mentality, or consensus... except as a start to recognize there is a problem... but not to reach a best outcome. Best outcomes are independent of the tools used to find them and wishful thinking impedes realistic expectations.
I hope this explanation makes it easier to put up with me. I don't expect much understanding, as you are all walking your own paths and unlikely to step off to inspect another. But I want you all to know that I inspect yours and appreciate them more than you may know. I walk in your moccasins more than you might think. It's part of Active Open-Mindedness. But that does not mean I choose to react as you might expect. I would rather find solutions than dwell in automatic agreement or unnatural-to-me displays of sympathy.
Please understand that I don't claim to know more than anyone, or that I have any special information, or that I'm any more intelligent than anyone else. What I do claim is a more useful method to evaluate the same information we all have without reaching biased conclusions, because I am not invested in defending anything but accuracy. Often an accuracy that I would prefer were otherwise. I am imperfect, still working to shed the biases and preconceptions that impede my progress, but I've come a long way.
This practice I engage comes at a high cost on a personal level. People think I am argumentative, when I am really only wishing to point out inconsistencies and alternatives and hopeful that they will realize they are not required to have a conclusion set in stone.
The world is presently lost, and we all know it... and doing the same things over and over, expecting better outcomes... well, you know...
I have to try, and you thinking less of me is a small price to pay in the grand scheme.
The problem is that people have become invested in defending their positions instead of thinking about alternatives. The great value I've found in Active Open-Mindedness is that I have diminished my need for other people's validation, while increasing my appreciation for what other people have to offer. My dependency on approval isn't governed by acceptance by a tribe, by fitting in, by going along.
Some of you may find that frightening, either from your own perspective as someone trying to relate to me, or as someone imagining what it must be like to be so separate from a group. I don't see myself as separate although I did at one time. I embrace all sides, understanding that all sides have more goals in common than they do obstacles to divide them. I may walk a path between, but I am only warmed by the flames on both sides.
For those of you who see everything politically, I am Conservative but not a nebbish for the now radicalized GOP. This makes me a liberal to those Republicans that believe agreeing blindly with the new definitions of radio talk show entertainers is a test of loyalty to the party. On the other hand, those of you on the left might assume I am lost to the dark side because I question your own party-inspired conclusions. We are all more closely associated than our political beliefs would have us think. Too invested in defending quickly accepted positions than entertaining common ground.
One thing I have been surprised to learn is that people agree ninety (?) percent of the time on basic goals no matter which side speaks, and I would remind you of that. I am NOT your enemy when we agree on so much. If we focus on our disagreements over strategies to attain goals, to the exclusion of our commonalities in what we wish to achieve, we all lose. Again, I would also remind you that both sides of politics agree on ninety percent of what is good for our nation, that disagreements are most often in how we get there.
Herd mentality in politics always reminds me of Mark Twain, “Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”
A few final thoughts on independence-of-thought by way of explanation.
If you don't have a dog in the fight, you aren't required to have an opinion.
There are no perfect solutions in a real world. Sometimes the best outcome is to accept and support an imperfect solution. Better outcomes are fluid, as information and circumstances change. Humans rarely take time to recognize and value new information and circumstances before they get to the point of tribal agreement, so solutions face formidable obstacles.
I fully support and applaud the #metoo movement. There are valuable lessons being offered and learned. But the issue, as presented, is very one-sided and would benefit from more discussion rather than demanding acquiescence and “the only proper response is to shut-up” shaming. Women are not the only slighted parties, nor are they the only victims. And men are not the only perpetrators. Female abuse against men is far more common than society likes to admit. No sexual harassment is acceptable, but misunderstandings are natural and normal.
Men pay a high cost for the power women see as attractive, desiring it for themselves. If you don't recognize this, most likely it is because those costs appear so normal when paid by men.
Hypocrisy is rampant in both parties, and denied by all. Hypocrisy benefits no one except those that feed on division.
Rote learning, and thinking, enforces conclusions, and only repetitiously entertaining different ideas will break that cycle. Don't expect to understand the first time.
Compromise has been sold to the right as an evil, as losing. This idea has bled into the left. Yet compromise is the best way to reach agreement and move on to best outcomes for both sides.
The largely unrecognized root wedge driving the political parties apart is abortion, and there is an imperfect compromise that could be beneficial if the my-side-is-the-only-side-invested would consider the damage they are doing and weigh the costs. A reasonable compromise would open the floodgates to other issues being addressed.
Global warming is real, and caused by human activity, more or less. Any unbiased person can supply points to be made on both sides of the argument. But only people trapped in ideological denial refuse to weigh the evidence impartially, and the outcome is uncertain only in the degree of harm we will leave to the future.
Faith is comforting, but people change flat tires.
Human population is the root cause of every environmental problem. The earth is a self-cleaning and self-repairing system, but only if it isn't over-burdened.
Death is not something to waste your time on by memorializing mortality. The stone memorials of today will lose meaning to future generations. Better to put effort into learning from our mistakes and finding solutions than placing wreaths on unknown graves.
Wisdom is not wisdom if it is not shared.
And one final thing. I only recently found out there was a name for what I discovered and designed to help myself. My journey has been independent of any formal training or expert advice, or influence. But in discovering the term, “Active Open-Mindedness,” it seems to fit well with what I am practicing. That may change... as I am not tied to anything except exploring for the best explanations that I can find.
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December 29, 2017
5 Essential Steps to Achieve Your Goals
©2017 Kari Carlisle
Yes, it’s that time of year again. Christmas is over, and the new year is fast approaching. If you’re like me, these days between the holidays are a good time for reflection on the past year and what lies ahead.
I recently read that the human brain has a tendency to dwell on the negative, and so, it’s hard to recognize successes rather than regret the failures. And that tendency just sets you up for more failure. Therefore, step one in achieving your goals is to recognize this self-defeating behavior, learn from past mistakes, and refocus on strategies that have led to past successes.
Step one will require some work. You will need to reflect on past goals, what tactics you used to achieve them, and whether or not you were successful. You may need to write all this down, and you may need the help of someone close to you who will be tactful and honest. Do what works best for you, and do not skip this step. It’s the very definition of insanity to keep doing the same thing and expect different results. If you were not successful before, you must change your strategy and tactics.
Step two is to create ONE goal. This goal must be measurable and achievable in a short period of time. Why? Because you’re going to run a test. No sense coming up with multiple goals to achieve over the coming year only to reach this time next year with nothing to show for it. You need to identify what is going to work for you.
Since weight loss is a very common goal, I’ll use that as an example. Goal: I will lose 10 pounds by January 31. This goal is measurable and achievable in a short period of time. This makes it more likely to achieve than the generic goal of “losing weight next year.”
Step three is to strategize how you will achieve your goal. What tactics will you use? Common strategies for weight loss include diet and exercise. Tactics drill down to the specifics – what will your diet consist of, and what kind of exercise, for example.
Step four is one that no one ever does, or if they do, they use it as an excuse to never even get started. You must identify the resources you’ll need to achieve your goal. Depending on the goal, the resources may involve time and money, space, tools and materials, and they may also include mental (knowledge, emotional) and physical resources, as well as outside support. Don’t worry about the resources you don’t have at this step. Just list all the resources you need. In our weight loss example, you’ll need a scale, food (the right kinds), time to exercise, mental determination to defeat cravings, and perhaps a cheerleader.
Step five is the preparation you need to do to get started on your goal. Here’s where you work toward obtaining the necessary resources. If a resource is not obtainable, you need to revise your goal or your strategy. Do NOT abandon your goal. Let’s say your circumstances make it difficult to find the time to exercise as you had planned. Instead of giving up in defeat, revise your strategy so you can exercise in a way that fits your schedule. You may have had dreams of hiking the Pacific Crest Trail, but alas, you have a job. So, dust off the boring treadmill, and exercise while watching the news.
As part of obtaining needed resources, you may need to remove some barriers. Barriers are anything that’s going to get in the way of achieving your goal. They are the things that may distract you such as snack foods, television, and people who do not support you. The worst barriers could be internal – that tendency toward negative thoughts and a defeatist attitude. While it may be difficult or impossible to completely remove these barriers, you must be aware of them and have a plan to overcome them.
Okay, now you’re ready to start your short-term test.
After it’s over, you’ll need to go back to step one – evaluation. Did you reach your goal? Or not? What worked for you? What didn’t? Did you miss a critical resource that you needed? Even if you did not achieve your goal and everything you tried met with failure, that’s good! It’s good because you spent only a short time to learn what works and what doesn’t. You didn’t spend a whole year trying to accomplish something only to fail. Now, you have an opportunity to grow from this experience and start fresh.
And if you did succeed in meeting your goal, congratulations! You have the same opportunity to grow and start fresh. Add new goals. Expand on your goals. Set mid- and long-term goals. Just remember to always evaluate, define your strategies, and make sure you have all the necessary resources. The beauty of this process is that you can grow exponentially as you utilize these steps. Setbacks are only means to identify strategies and tactics that don’t work for you.
Whatever your goals, when you find the strategies and tactics that resonate with you, stay with them. If rewards work, always use rewards. If you live for crossing things off lists, then always use lists. Don’t let anyone else’s idea of “the correct path” to a goal infiltrate what you learn about your own personal motivations.
Here’s wishing you great success in all your endeavors in the years to come!
Click here to receive the Apocalypse Observer Newsletter in your inbox
www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
Yes, it’s that time of year again. Christmas is over, and the new year is fast approaching. If you’re like me, these days between the holidays are a good time for reflection on the past year and what lies ahead.
I recently read that the human brain has a tendency to dwell on the negative, and so, it’s hard to recognize successes rather than regret the failures. And that tendency just sets you up for more failure. Therefore, step one in achieving your goals is to recognize this self-defeating behavior, learn from past mistakes, and refocus on strategies that have led to past successes.
Step one will require some work. You will need to reflect on past goals, what tactics you used to achieve them, and whether or not you were successful. You may need to write all this down, and you may need the help of someone close to you who will be tactful and honest. Do what works best for you, and do not skip this step. It’s the very definition of insanity to keep doing the same thing and expect different results. If you were not successful before, you must change your strategy and tactics.
Step two is to create ONE goal. This goal must be measurable and achievable in a short period of time. Why? Because you’re going to run a test. No sense coming up with multiple goals to achieve over the coming year only to reach this time next year with nothing to show for it. You need to identify what is going to work for you.
Since weight loss is a very common goal, I’ll use that as an example. Goal: I will lose 10 pounds by January 31. This goal is measurable and achievable in a short period of time. This makes it more likely to achieve than the generic goal of “losing weight next year.”
Step three is to strategize how you will achieve your goal. What tactics will you use? Common strategies for weight loss include diet and exercise. Tactics drill down to the specifics – what will your diet consist of, and what kind of exercise, for example.
Step four is one that no one ever does, or if they do, they use it as an excuse to never even get started. You must identify the resources you’ll need to achieve your goal. Depending on the goal, the resources may involve time and money, space, tools and materials, and they may also include mental (knowledge, emotional) and physical resources, as well as outside support. Don’t worry about the resources you don’t have at this step. Just list all the resources you need. In our weight loss example, you’ll need a scale, food (the right kinds), time to exercise, mental determination to defeat cravings, and perhaps a cheerleader.
Step five is the preparation you need to do to get started on your goal. Here’s where you work toward obtaining the necessary resources. If a resource is not obtainable, you need to revise your goal or your strategy. Do NOT abandon your goal. Let’s say your circumstances make it difficult to find the time to exercise as you had planned. Instead of giving up in defeat, revise your strategy so you can exercise in a way that fits your schedule. You may have had dreams of hiking the Pacific Crest Trail, but alas, you have a job. So, dust off the boring treadmill, and exercise while watching the news.
As part of obtaining needed resources, you may need to remove some barriers. Barriers are anything that’s going to get in the way of achieving your goal. They are the things that may distract you such as snack foods, television, and people who do not support you. The worst barriers could be internal – that tendency toward negative thoughts and a defeatist attitude. While it may be difficult or impossible to completely remove these barriers, you must be aware of them and have a plan to overcome them.
Okay, now you’re ready to start your short-term test.
After it’s over, you’ll need to go back to step one – evaluation. Did you reach your goal? Or not? What worked for you? What didn’t? Did you miss a critical resource that you needed? Even if you did not achieve your goal and everything you tried met with failure, that’s good! It’s good because you spent only a short time to learn what works and what doesn’t. You didn’t spend a whole year trying to accomplish something only to fail. Now, you have an opportunity to grow from this experience and start fresh.
And if you did succeed in meeting your goal, congratulations! You have the same opportunity to grow and start fresh. Add new goals. Expand on your goals. Set mid- and long-term goals. Just remember to always evaluate, define your strategies, and make sure you have all the necessary resources. The beauty of this process is that you can grow exponentially as you utilize these steps. Setbacks are only means to identify strategies and tactics that don’t work for you.
Whatever your goals, when you find the strategies and tactics that resonate with you, stay with them. If rewards work, always use rewards. If you live for crossing things off lists, then always use lists. Don’t let anyone else’s idea of “the correct path” to a goal infiltrate what you learn about your own personal motivations.
Here’s wishing you great success in all your endeavors in the years to come!
Click here to receive the Apocalypse Observer Newsletter in your inbox
www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
December 22, 2017
Short Story: Aftermath
©2017 C. Henry Martens
The morning was cool but warming as I lay the last shovel of dirt over Jason. I carefully tamped it down, as I had the rest, and leaned back to think about how the future was changed. The silence was only accentuated by the sounds of nature surrounding me.
A young man, Jason died suddenly. Perhaps it was the tooth that gave him trouble over the last couple of years, even before the rest died. He had fallen hard a few days ago, and I suppose he could have taken an internal injury without knowing.
My thoughts wandered easily over the possibilities that no longer included Jason's priorities. He had kept me busy, to be sure. So many of the things he considered necessary seemed less so to me.
I left the shovel standing. A marker over his resting place. Perhaps a tribute to his industriousness.
I wondered if he knew...
The house was welcoming as I entered. I think familiarity enveloped me as much without Jason's presence.
§
A bull of too much size surrendered to my bullet, and the herd would be protected from his genetic potentials. The priorities were different now, without any concern for selling pounds of flesh to feed a population. Now I weeded according to future concern for animals surviving without assistance. A death now would prevent many deaths in the years to come, or at least that was the idea.
The fence, an unbroken row of vehicles, plugged the north valley. The south valley was sealed by the same strategy thirty miles away. We had spent a lot of time looking for keys to drive the no-longer-useful conveyances to the area we picked. Now they stood in an ungainly row, nose to tail and wobbly over the uneven ground, and would stay that way until they succumbed to time. That would be a long while, as evidenced by only a few of the tires having lost air so far.
A ranch hand, Jason insisted on blocking off the valley top and bottom. He mentioned security and “raiding hordes” when he first broached the subject, but I suspect he was just a fan of good fences as he also insisted on maintaining livestock.
We took some time figuring out how to make a solid but movable gate across the highway at each end. He seemed to appreciate my suggestion, and an apparatus of cables and mass and physically powered wheels now graced each opening, affording access and egress.
The valley wasn't tight, as the dirt roads into the mountain ranges to either side remained open. But animals are lazy for the most part, and the ones that were not docile would be the ones with bad attitudes, the ones we didn't want.
The approaching hordes never materialized, and the only time we used the gate was the once we traveled to the city north of us. The empty, wind-blown streets proved depressing, and Jason never exhibited any interest in returning. We have all we needed here.
§
The spring garden was just beginning to bear fruit when the two women showed up. They made short work of opening the south gate, and they closed it behind them. That spoke well of them.
A small house with a fireplace accepted them, and soon the hearth was cheerfully aflame and warming. The few surrounding houses yielded some few unopened food containers, and they made themselves comfortable in a temporary fashion, as they expected to move on.
§
Smoke rising and darkening the air alerted me to the possibility of strangers. After years of non-existent vehicular traffic or industry, the atmosphere had cleared and smoke was easy to see.
Feeling no particular urgency, I decided to wait until morning to investigate. I expected a brush fire started by the sun shining through glass or some kind of spark igniting dry grass. There hadn't been any rain for a week, and no lightening even then. Human beings didn't cross my mind.
There was no reason to drive, and I was finding it increasingly difficult to justify starting the truck anyway.
The chestnut gelding nuzzled my hand as I offered him a fresh carrot. He was always the first to approach, and drove the rest away if I let him. A glutton for the treats. His sweet tooth would have worked him to death if I always chose the easiest horse to catch. Instead, I shooed the bully away and enticed the blue roan, and soon he was saddled and we were on our way.
The chill of spring left dew on the grass for a long time before the warming day dried it. I was always interested in how the valley was returning to a natural state. By now, Jason had been dead for over eight years, and he would have been delighted. I missed him, but the horses gave me some comfort. Soon, the roan was warmed up and I urged him into a slow canter to cover ground. Both of us enjoyed the extra speed, and I had to hold the horse in.
As soon as Jason and I knew no one was alive in the vicinity and live media transmissions ceased, he felt we owned the valley. Right away we discussed what to do, and the young ranch hand wanted to return the area to a pristine state. He insisted on bulldozing and burning all but a few structures, and I had no reason to object. We kept one tiny town at the south end of the valley intact for the most part, only cleaning up the refuse of human activity. At the north end, the larger town met its fate in a conflagration during a windy summer evening. We left one neighborhood of tiny homes so we would have somewhere to stay during forays. Inspecting several homes and buildings in the central valley, finally settling on a large, sturdy shop and small house north of center, we moved in and leveled everything else. Everything we had no use for, built by humans, was razed as we discovered them. By the time the two strangers showed up, the natural environment had minimized any sign of humanity, except for those structures we pardoned and the road through the low ground.
Considerate of my horse's health, I shunned the pavement. Open ground through thickets of returning growth swallowed up the miles, and soon, we approached the little town we had saved from annihilation. By now I knew the smoke was coming from a chimney, so I approached with caution.
A worn and dirty vehicle with a crumpled fender and a soft tire occupied the parking area in front of a small cottage. A woman of advanced age sat on the front porch, puffing on some kind of cigarette and scratching beneath her loose blouse. Her hair was clean but astray, her clothes likewise, and she seemed very content to watch the clouds and sip from a cup she held as though keeping her hands warm.
One of the best things about an apocalypse is realizing that time has no meaning. After putting the roan in a standing corral out of sight, there was no reason to be in a hurry. I settled into a hidden nook to watch.
I had few expectations, other than the elderly woman having a companion. A lone person of her age seemed an improbable traveler.
A younger woman stepped from the door, also holding a cup. She looked around with a scowl on her face. After a couple of harsh words and the elderly woman making a gesture to brush them off, the younger traveler reentered the cottage.
I considered contact, but the women being heated put me off. I had no desire to put myself in the middle of an argument.
Soon, the young woman emerged once again. She carried a few things, probably personal items used during their overnight stay. Starting the car, the woman exited the SUV with a small box trailing a thick cord and a smaller cord still attached inside. The soft tire was soon aired up, the woman not bothering to check pressure and judging her task by eye. She thumped the tire with her fist and threw the compressor into the back seat.
The older woman paid little attention to the activity, but when the younger seated herself again and put on her seat belt, the elder got up and ambled to the passenger door and got in. The cigarette she had lit, soon after finishing the first I saw her smoking, flew from the car window as they drove away.
§ I've often considered why I never stepped out of the shadows. I've never seen another human being since. The years have sped by. I monitored the airwaves, listening and looking for signs that humans have rebuilt their race. There has been nothing.
I've run the numbers, too. Statistics are a part of history, even when there are no humans to study them. The numbers of humans once alive. The numbers that died. The rate of recovery for the environment. The new species that have evolved. The stars that have winked out. The speed at which the moon diminished, finally disappearing into the void.
Time is a human construct. So are numbers. But they have proven useful over my existence. Even a synthetic can find value in keeping busy.
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To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
The morning was cool but warming as I lay the last shovel of dirt over Jason. I carefully tamped it down, as I had the rest, and leaned back to think about how the future was changed. The silence was only accentuated by the sounds of nature surrounding me.
A young man, Jason died suddenly. Perhaps it was the tooth that gave him trouble over the last couple of years, even before the rest died. He had fallen hard a few days ago, and I suppose he could have taken an internal injury without knowing.
My thoughts wandered easily over the possibilities that no longer included Jason's priorities. He had kept me busy, to be sure. So many of the things he considered necessary seemed less so to me.
I left the shovel standing. A marker over his resting place. Perhaps a tribute to his industriousness.
I wondered if he knew...
The house was welcoming as I entered. I think familiarity enveloped me as much without Jason's presence.
§
A bull of too much size surrendered to my bullet, and the herd would be protected from his genetic potentials. The priorities were different now, without any concern for selling pounds of flesh to feed a population. Now I weeded according to future concern for animals surviving without assistance. A death now would prevent many deaths in the years to come, or at least that was the idea.
The fence, an unbroken row of vehicles, plugged the north valley. The south valley was sealed by the same strategy thirty miles away. We had spent a lot of time looking for keys to drive the no-longer-useful conveyances to the area we picked. Now they stood in an ungainly row, nose to tail and wobbly over the uneven ground, and would stay that way until they succumbed to time. That would be a long while, as evidenced by only a few of the tires having lost air so far.
A ranch hand, Jason insisted on blocking off the valley top and bottom. He mentioned security and “raiding hordes” when he first broached the subject, but I suspect he was just a fan of good fences as he also insisted on maintaining livestock.
We took some time figuring out how to make a solid but movable gate across the highway at each end. He seemed to appreciate my suggestion, and an apparatus of cables and mass and physically powered wheels now graced each opening, affording access and egress.
The valley wasn't tight, as the dirt roads into the mountain ranges to either side remained open. But animals are lazy for the most part, and the ones that were not docile would be the ones with bad attitudes, the ones we didn't want.
The approaching hordes never materialized, and the only time we used the gate was the once we traveled to the city north of us. The empty, wind-blown streets proved depressing, and Jason never exhibited any interest in returning. We have all we needed here.
§
The spring garden was just beginning to bear fruit when the two women showed up. They made short work of opening the south gate, and they closed it behind them. That spoke well of them.
A small house with a fireplace accepted them, and soon the hearth was cheerfully aflame and warming. The few surrounding houses yielded some few unopened food containers, and they made themselves comfortable in a temporary fashion, as they expected to move on.
§
Smoke rising and darkening the air alerted me to the possibility of strangers. After years of non-existent vehicular traffic or industry, the atmosphere had cleared and smoke was easy to see.
Feeling no particular urgency, I decided to wait until morning to investigate. I expected a brush fire started by the sun shining through glass or some kind of spark igniting dry grass. There hadn't been any rain for a week, and no lightening even then. Human beings didn't cross my mind.
There was no reason to drive, and I was finding it increasingly difficult to justify starting the truck anyway.
The chestnut gelding nuzzled my hand as I offered him a fresh carrot. He was always the first to approach, and drove the rest away if I let him. A glutton for the treats. His sweet tooth would have worked him to death if I always chose the easiest horse to catch. Instead, I shooed the bully away and enticed the blue roan, and soon he was saddled and we were on our way.
The chill of spring left dew on the grass for a long time before the warming day dried it. I was always interested in how the valley was returning to a natural state. By now, Jason had been dead for over eight years, and he would have been delighted. I missed him, but the horses gave me some comfort. Soon, the roan was warmed up and I urged him into a slow canter to cover ground. Both of us enjoyed the extra speed, and I had to hold the horse in.
As soon as Jason and I knew no one was alive in the vicinity and live media transmissions ceased, he felt we owned the valley. Right away we discussed what to do, and the young ranch hand wanted to return the area to a pristine state. He insisted on bulldozing and burning all but a few structures, and I had no reason to object. We kept one tiny town at the south end of the valley intact for the most part, only cleaning up the refuse of human activity. At the north end, the larger town met its fate in a conflagration during a windy summer evening. We left one neighborhood of tiny homes so we would have somewhere to stay during forays. Inspecting several homes and buildings in the central valley, finally settling on a large, sturdy shop and small house north of center, we moved in and leveled everything else. Everything we had no use for, built by humans, was razed as we discovered them. By the time the two strangers showed up, the natural environment had minimized any sign of humanity, except for those structures we pardoned and the road through the low ground.
Considerate of my horse's health, I shunned the pavement. Open ground through thickets of returning growth swallowed up the miles, and soon, we approached the little town we had saved from annihilation. By now I knew the smoke was coming from a chimney, so I approached with caution.
A worn and dirty vehicle with a crumpled fender and a soft tire occupied the parking area in front of a small cottage. A woman of advanced age sat on the front porch, puffing on some kind of cigarette and scratching beneath her loose blouse. Her hair was clean but astray, her clothes likewise, and she seemed very content to watch the clouds and sip from a cup she held as though keeping her hands warm.
One of the best things about an apocalypse is realizing that time has no meaning. After putting the roan in a standing corral out of sight, there was no reason to be in a hurry. I settled into a hidden nook to watch.
I had few expectations, other than the elderly woman having a companion. A lone person of her age seemed an improbable traveler.
A younger woman stepped from the door, also holding a cup. She looked around with a scowl on her face. After a couple of harsh words and the elderly woman making a gesture to brush them off, the younger traveler reentered the cottage.
I considered contact, but the women being heated put me off. I had no desire to put myself in the middle of an argument.
Soon, the young woman emerged once again. She carried a few things, probably personal items used during their overnight stay. Starting the car, the woman exited the SUV with a small box trailing a thick cord and a smaller cord still attached inside. The soft tire was soon aired up, the woman not bothering to check pressure and judging her task by eye. She thumped the tire with her fist and threw the compressor into the back seat.
The older woman paid little attention to the activity, but when the younger seated herself again and put on her seat belt, the elder got up and ambled to the passenger door and got in. The cigarette she had lit, soon after finishing the first I saw her smoking, flew from the car window as they drove away.
§ I've often considered why I never stepped out of the shadows. I've never seen another human being since. The years have sped by. I monitored the airwaves, listening and looking for signs that humans have rebuilt their race. There has been nothing.
I've run the numbers, too. Statistics are a part of history, even when there are no humans to study them. The numbers of humans once alive. The numbers that died. The rate of recovery for the environment. The new species that have evolved. The stars that have winked out. The speed at which the moon diminished, finally disappearing into the void.
Time is a human construct. So are numbers. But they have proven useful over my existence. Even a synthetic can find value in keeping busy.
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December 15, 2017
Context
©2017 C. Henry Martens
Context: noun. The circumstances that form the setting for an event, statement, or idea, and in terms of which it can be fully understood and assessed. Also, the parts of something written or spoken that immediately precede and follow a word or passage and clarify its meaning.
I like to play with different scenarios in my head. The imagination is a useful tool when coupled with the rest of the toolbox humans possess. One of the things I like to play with is context. Putting the bald statements of politicians and experts to the test by placing them in context is an enjoyable mind exercise, and helps me to keep an open mind based in reality. Basically, placing statements-of-fact in context allows me to see the hidden agendas, the generalizations, and the outright falsehoods that many people accept without thought.
Fear sells. It is a fact of life that if a politician can scare you into thinking there is a risk, and can sell you on the idea that (s)he will address the issue to your benefit, you are more likely to vote for him/her. This is why airports are crammed with people waiting in lines, removing their shoes and metal objects, and being groped willingly by strangers.
But what about context?
Did you know that excluding 9/11/2001, when 2,983 people lost their lives to terrorism... excluding that single date in the years from 1975 through 2015, there were 41 people killed by foreign born terrorists? That would be one per year on average, according to a study for the Cato Institute by Alex Nowrasteh.
I don't know... but doesn't it seem reasonable that most of those foreign born terrorist deaths could be CIA agents in the performance of their placed-in-harm's-way kind of jobs? Or are they even safer than I might expect?
A little context... and by extension a few questions spring to mind.
How much does it cost to protect us from a threat that kills on average one person a year? How many politicians are elected using these fears, and are they the kind of politicians that have reasonable priorities? And if they are only manipulating votes by selling fear, then what are their real agendas? All of this money being spent, to say nothing of the emotional costs and the lack of worthy concern over better priorities.
Better priorities? Maybe I should explain that. Another context.
To keep it simple I'll just take one example. Media coverage. Now the media likes terrorism. It is easy news, and news that sells. The media doesn't have to dig hard to sell terrorism because they can spin the same story several ways, almost as though a single incident could be sold as several separate events depending on the perspective presented. Not that they do this intentionally (ahem), but isn't it amazing how terrorism stays in the news and other things are never reported on or get little coverage? So the point I'm making is that there are hidden costs to terrorism, and one of those costs is a lack of good journalism. Your need to know is being minimized by “easy news”.
So context...
There are so many fun mind games to be explored.
How would men feel about abortion if they were saddled with the child in the same percentages that women are now? How would women feel if they were denied their children in favor of men? What if men were required to raise the children they father, and women were not? Context.
How many people would breed unwanted animals if they knew the real statistics in how many domestic cats and dogs are euthanized at shelters? And how “no-kill shelters” either refuse excess animals or transfer them to kill shelters after proving less than adoptable? Context.
How would you feel about doing something you love if the purchaser was going to use it for purposes you felt to be repugnant? If you are a gay baker, do you have the right to refuse to bake a wedding cake for straight people? Does a person of color have the right to refuse a contract making flags for white supremacists? If police officers were targeting white people going through black neighborhoods, much more likely to use lethal force, would taking a knee during the National Anthem be more acceptable as a protest? Context.
Context...
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Context: noun. The circumstances that form the setting for an event, statement, or idea, and in terms of which it can be fully understood and assessed. Also, the parts of something written or spoken that immediately precede and follow a word or passage and clarify its meaning.
I like to play with different scenarios in my head. The imagination is a useful tool when coupled with the rest of the toolbox humans possess. One of the things I like to play with is context. Putting the bald statements of politicians and experts to the test by placing them in context is an enjoyable mind exercise, and helps me to keep an open mind based in reality. Basically, placing statements-of-fact in context allows me to see the hidden agendas, the generalizations, and the outright falsehoods that many people accept without thought.
Fear sells. It is a fact of life that if a politician can scare you into thinking there is a risk, and can sell you on the idea that (s)he will address the issue to your benefit, you are more likely to vote for him/her. This is why airports are crammed with people waiting in lines, removing their shoes and metal objects, and being groped willingly by strangers.
But what about context?
Did you know that excluding 9/11/2001, when 2,983 people lost their lives to terrorism... excluding that single date in the years from 1975 through 2015, there were 41 people killed by foreign born terrorists? That would be one per year on average, according to a study for the Cato Institute by Alex Nowrasteh.
I don't know... but doesn't it seem reasonable that most of those foreign born terrorist deaths could be CIA agents in the performance of their placed-in-harm's-way kind of jobs? Or are they even safer than I might expect?
A little context... and by extension a few questions spring to mind.
How much does it cost to protect us from a threat that kills on average one person a year? How many politicians are elected using these fears, and are they the kind of politicians that have reasonable priorities? And if they are only manipulating votes by selling fear, then what are their real agendas? All of this money being spent, to say nothing of the emotional costs and the lack of worthy concern over better priorities.
Better priorities? Maybe I should explain that. Another context.
To keep it simple I'll just take one example. Media coverage. Now the media likes terrorism. It is easy news, and news that sells. The media doesn't have to dig hard to sell terrorism because they can spin the same story several ways, almost as though a single incident could be sold as several separate events depending on the perspective presented. Not that they do this intentionally (ahem), but isn't it amazing how terrorism stays in the news and other things are never reported on or get little coverage? So the point I'm making is that there are hidden costs to terrorism, and one of those costs is a lack of good journalism. Your need to know is being minimized by “easy news”.
So context...
There are so many fun mind games to be explored.
How would men feel about abortion if they were saddled with the child in the same percentages that women are now? How would women feel if they were denied their children in favor of men? What if men were required to raise the children they father, and women were not? Context.
How many people would breed unwanted animals if they knew the real statistics in how many domestic cats and dogs are euthanized at shelters? And how “no-kill shelters” either refuse excess animals or transfer them to kill shelters after proving less than adoptable? Context.
How would you feel about doing something you love if the purchaser was going to use it for purposes you felt to be repugnant? If you are a gay baker, do you have the right to refuse to bake a wedding cake for straight people? Does a person of color have the right to refuse a contract making flags for white supremacists? If police officers were targeting white people going through black neighborhoods, much more likely to use lethal force, would taking a knee during the National Anthem be more acceptable as a protest? Context.
Context...
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December 8, 2017
Movie Review: Valerian
©2017 C. Henry Martens
I try to do positive movie reviews. I just don't find it worth my time or emotional expense to put effort into bad movies.
But I'll make an exception this time.
Maybe my negativity about the movie Valerian is because it is a terrible film, but even more, it is a waste of exceptional effort and tremendous talent.
To be specific, this is what you get when you splice really good cinematic ability, special effects, costume and set design, with a mediocre script and an overwhelmed director.
The tragedy of this film is not in the story because the tale was too weakly presented to make the point of any calamity that could have made the picture worth watching. And the two young actors burdened with carrying the storyline were also burdened with a script they couldn't sell.
I blame the director.
This is what happens when the person running the show can't decide whether to be serious, or silly. I am not a fan of gratuitous humor. This movie was ruined by unfunny and unnecessary dialogue, delivered in a way that was painful to experience. I was left wondering if the acting was as bad as it appeared or if the actors were just badly directed.
To give the movie some positive feedback, I have to say that even though the alien characters critical to the story reminded me of Avatar's Na'vi, they worked. They were well done artistically, enough so that the similarity was easy to forgive. Special effects, mostly alien creatures, seemed more sophisticated in their design and presentation than in many films.
We go to movies like this with an expectation of having to suspend our *sense of disbelief*. That ability, to place our concept of reality on hold, is critical to enjoying science fiction or fantasy. But this film beats us over the head with improbability, and when we might have risen to try again, it delivers unbelievably cliché dialogue that grips us in a syrupy stickiness.
Want a good movie to rent? Stay away from this painful attempt.
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To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
I try to do positive movie reviews. I just don't find it worth my time or emotional expense to put effort into bad movies.
But I'll make an exception this time.
Maybe my negativity about the movie Valerian is because it is a terrible film, but even more, it is a waste of exceptional effort and tremendous talent.
To be specific, this is what you get when you splice really good cinematic ability, special effects, costume and set design, with a mediocre script and an overwhelmed director.
The tragedy of this film is not in the story because the tale was too weakly presented to make the point of any calamity that could have made the picture worth watching. And the two young actors burdened with carrying the storyline were also burdened with a script they couldn't sell.
I blame the director.
This is what happens when the person running the show can't decide whether to be serious, or silly. I am not a fan of gratuitous humor. This movie was ruined by unfunny and unnecessary dialogue, delivered in a way that was painful to experience. I was left wondering if the acting was as bad as it appeared or if the actors were just badly directed.
To give the movie some positive feedback, I have to say that even though the alien characters critical to the story reminded me of Avatar's Na'vi, they worked. They were well done artistically, enough so that the similarity was easy to forgive. Special effects, mostly alien creatures, seemed more sophisticated in their design and presentation than in many films.
We go to movies like this with an expectation of having to suspend our *sense of disbelief*. That ability, to place our concept of reality on hold, is critical to enjoying science fiction or fantasy. But this film beats us over the head with improbability, and when we might have risen to try again, it delivers unbelievably cliché dialogue that grips us in a syrupy stickiness.
Want a good movie to rent? Stay away from this painful attempt.
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www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
December 1, 2017
Retail Apocalypse? Let's Go to the Mall!
©2017 Kari Carlisle
I am NOT a mall person. I hadn’t been to a mall in years until the other day when it seemed like the right thing to do. And it was!
One of my favorite fake songs is “Let’s Go to the Mall” sung by Robin Sparkles, 90’s Canadian teen entertainer, in How I Met Your Mother. It’s catchy. It’s upbeat. And it recalls the glory days of my youth in the 80’s (“The 80’s didn’t hit Canada until the 90’s,” according to Robin). I wasn’t a mall person then, either, but the song represents the spirit and fashion of a time when the U.S. economy was growing.
Now, they say we’re in a Retail Apocalypse. Stores are going bankrupt and closing. Malls and strip centers are half empty. People can find everything they need or want online and at cheaper prices. Is it the end of an era?
And I hear there’s no such thing as Black Friday or Cyber Monday anymore. All the amazing deals and shopping opportunities have sort of spread out over the whole month of November, so now I see Black November specials being advertised. I think that’s a good thing. I’ve never been a fan of Black Friday, anyway, opting to spend the day hiking if I am not working.
Well, the other day, my husband and I took a day trip to do some “fun” shopping. We didn’t need anything, we had just gotten paid, and all the holiday specials were getting into swing. After hitting a couple of big thrift stores and scoring big on a Doctor Who miniskirt and a Dalek keychain (Phoenix Comicon, here I come!), we got hungry, only to discover ourselves on the end of town with no decent restaurants.
After weighing the option of driving to the other end of town, even though we weren’t done shopping on THIS end, my husband suggested what I was already reluctantly thinking. Should we go to the mall and see what’s in the food court? <heavy sigh> I guess…
So, for the sake of time, that’s what we did. And it opened up a whole new world of wonders! Well, not quite, but I was pleasantly surprised.
Flagstaff Mall is small, so it doesn’t have a very large food court… six dining options, I counted. After walking around, I couldn’t decide where to eat – they all looked good to me! The Mexican food restaurant gave out samples, and I was sold on a green chile quesadilla on a handmade tortilla. My husband opted for a gyro from the family-owned, New York-inspired restaurant. The owner took his order personally. I asked about the baklava on display, and he said they are homemade by his mother using a family recipe. So, we split an order of baklava – how could we turn that down?!
After eating an excellent lunch, we were too stuffed to leave and decided to walk around the mall to walk off some of those calories. I wasn’t surprised to see a few empty stores, but more stores were occupied than I expected. There were the usual chain stores, but then, we started seeing some interesting specialty stores.
The first of those specialty stores was an antique shop – in a mall! We wandered in and expected a bland selection at outrageous prices. I was floored. I love going to antique shops and usually find a lot of junk. Not here. What I found was a selection of museum-quality pieces from southwest Native American art to European oil paintings to African tribal art and everything in between. And the prices? Shockingly reasonable. There were a good many items that I would know the market value, and they were all priced at or below what you would find in other stores. The shop owner knows his stuff, too. I listened in as he answered another customer’s questions about some of the paintings, and he was honest, accurate, and forthcoming. It was like getting a private docent tour at an art museum. For free!
Another shop we had to check out was a local artists’ cooperative. All kinds of arts and crafts from dozens of local artists was available in a range of prices. And they even served cookies! Too bad I was too full to take advantage.
The biggest surprise was discovering my friend’s new business, XCape, which includes escape rooms,* party room, and glow-in-the-dark mini golf. I knew she was starting a new business, but I didn’t realize it was in the mall. We had a great visit with her, and though the escape rooms weren’t finished yet, the golf was open, and lots of people were having fun taking in 9 holes. We got an exclusive peek at the escape rooms which should be open as you read this. We will definitely return soon to play!
So, if there is a Retail Apocalypse going on, maybe it’s a good thing, giving the smaller businesses opportunities they couldn’t afford in the past. Flagstaff Mall has piqued my curiosity. I may not resist so much to go into other malls.
*An escape room is the latest rage – you get locked into a fully furnished room and must solve a series of puzzles to find the key to escape.
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To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
I am NOT a mall person. I hadn’t been to a mall in years until the other day when it seemed like the right thing to do. And it was!
One of my favorite fake songs is “Let’s Go to the Mall” sung by Robin Sparkles, 90’s Canadian teen entertainer, in How I Met Your Mother. It’s catchy. It’s upbeat. And it recalls the glory days of my youth in the 80’s (“The 80’s didn’t hit Canada until the 90’s,” according to Robin). I wasn’t a mall person then, either, but the song represents the spirit and fashion of a time when the U.S. economy was growing.
Now, they say we’re in a Retail Apocalypse. Stores are going bankrupt and closing. Malls and strip centers are half empty. People can find everything they need or want online and at cheaper prices. Is it the end of an era?
And I hear there’s no such thing as Black Friday or Cyber Monday anymore. All the amazing deals and shopping opportunities have sort of spread out over the whole month of November, so now I see Black November specials being advertised. I think that’s a good thing. I’ve never been a fan of Black Friday, anyway, opting to spend the day hiking if I am not working.
Well, the other day, my husband and I took a day trip to do some “fun” shopping. We didn’t need anything, we had just gotten paid, and all the holiday specials were getting into swing. After hitting a couple of big thrift stores and scoring big on a Doctor Who miniskirt and a Dalek keychain (Phoenix Comicon, here I come!), we got hungry, only to discover ourselves on the end of town with no decent restaurants.
After weighing the option of driving to the other end of town, even though we weren’t done shopping on THIS end, my husband suggested what I was already reluctantly thinking. Should we go to the mall and see what’s in the food court? <heavy sigh> I guess…
So, for the sake of time, that’s what we did. And it opened up a whole new world of wonders! Well, not quite, but I was pleasantly surprised.
Flagstaff Mall is small, so it doesn’t have a very large food court… six dining options, I counted. After walking around, I couldn’t decide where to eat – they all looked good to me! The Mexican food restaurant gave out samples, and I was sold on a green chile quesadilla on a handmade tortilla. My husband opted for a gyro from the family-owned, New York-inspired restaurant. The owner took his order personally. I asked about the baklava on display, and he said they are homemade by his mother using a family recipe. So, we split an order of baklava – how could we turn that down?!
After eating an excellent lunch, we were too stuffed to leave and decided to walk around the mall to walk off some of those calories. I wasn’t surprised to see a few empty stores, but more stores were occupied than I expected. There were the usual chain stores, but then, we started seeing some interesting specialty stores.
The first of those specialty stores was an antique shop – in a mall! We wandered in and expected a bland selection at outrageous prices. I was floored. I love going to antique shops and usually find a lot of junk. Not here. What I found was a selection of museum-quality pieces from southwest Native American art to European oil paintings to African tribal art and everything in between. And the prices? Shockingly reasonable. There were a good many items that I would know the market value, and they were all priced at or below what you would find in other stores. The shop owner knows his stuff, too. I listened in as he answered another customer’s questions about some of the paintings, and he was honest, accurate, and forthcoming. It was like getting a private docent tour at an art museum. For free!
Another shop we had to check out was a local artists’ cooperative. All kinds of arts and crafts from dozens of local artists was available in a range of prices. And they even served cookies! Too bad I was too full to take advantage.
The biggest surprise was discovering my friend’s new business, XCape, which includes escape rooms,* party room, and glow-in-the-dark mini golf. I knew she was starting a new business, but I didn’t realize it was in the mall. We had a great visit with her, and though the escape rooms weren’t finished yet, the golf was open, and lots of people were having fun taking in 9 holes. We got an exclusive peek at the escape rooms which should be open as you read this. We will definitely return soon to play!
So, if there is a Retail Apocalypse going on, maybe it’s a good thing, giving the smaller businesses opportunities they couldn’t afford in the past. Flagstaff Mall has piqued my curiosity. I may not resist so much to go into other malls.
*An escape room is the latest rage – you get locked into a fully furnished room and must solve a series of puzzles to find the key to escape.
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www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
November 24, 2017
Gender and Sexual Misconduct - #metoo
©2017 C. Henry Martens
Well... as I am writing this another man has been accused of abusing women sexually. I am not writing this to make excuses for men. Far from it, I recognize how male behavior can be reprehensible. The only comment I have in this regard is that people are increasingly looking for black and white perfection, when the world is a very gray place. In this context, the gray areas we seem to easily forget, I write this article.
The recent news stories have brought many thoughts to me. I am a feminist in that I believe in equality of opportunity. I believe in equal pay for equal work. I believe in supporting and fighting for a forum for my wife and daughter and granddaughter to express their concerns, and as long as they are legitimate and well presented... to change my thought processes and actions to accommodate them.
Just as I do for myself and my son and grandson. Equality.
In this most recent process, I am seeing a huge lack of reciprocity, the opportunity for men to participate in any dialogue. I have tried, but women are angry, and my own experience has been to be shut down and even vilified for presenting a male perspective.
But being told that the only “proper response is to shut up” doesn't stop the thought process.
So I've been thinking while I listen. And my thoughts began to naturally wander toward my own experiences. I have a couple of encounters in my past where I wonder if I crossed the line as an adult. I don't *know*, but I believe I may have stepped beyond propriety. I regret these experiences.
I was also sexually curious as a child, but after research, I found out that 85% of children have sexual experiences within the context of play and that these experiences are considered natural and normal. I might add that even if the roughly 50% that are male were 100% engaged, that would mean 75% of females would be engaged to get to the 85% stated from my source.
But I was still thinking. As the conversations continued, the numbers of men grew, the anger and frustration swelled... I kept thinking, and much of it was about my past experiences.
And then the light bulb came on.
You see, even though I have never seen my experiences as abusive from my male perspective... as in MYSELF being abused, in the context of the way these discussions are framed many of them WERE abusive to ME.
Remembering them, I began to place myself in the memories as the female participant and the woman as the male participant. A thought experiment. And the light bulb BLAZED.
The most obvious one was where a much older woman offered me a place to live during a temporary job in the area she lived. I had rented an apartment in a house, the building sold, and I was scrambling to find a place to live. She worked as a hostess at a local restaurant where I had breakfast every morning, and she offered her cabin at the lake. She said as long as she didn't charge rent, no one would care. But they did... and soon she was offering an extra bedroom in her home. A home she shared with her husband and a son that was almost as old as me. Soon she was offering to “take me to ecstasy”, and nuzzling my neck in unsolicited embraces. And what was I to do? I was titillated and felt complimented as she was a stunningly beautiful woman. And I needed a place to live. I'm absolutely sure her husband knew what was going on as time went on. There was too much sun lotion being applied, too many unnecessary hugs, too many interrupted whispers.
I managed to avoid coitus, although this woman tried mightily to arrange encounters. She and her husband even showed up at my wedding, driving several hundred miles, she to proposition me the night before the event.
Doesn't this sound like abuse?
As I continued to think about the past, my growing list of experiences, I came to realize that the women involved were as likely to be abusive of me, perhaps more so.
I have two fingers on my hand where I feel I may have crossed a line. But I have both hands used when counting abuses of myself. Perhaps this discrepancy is natural. We tend to remember the slights in life more than the more subtle support, don't we?
Some of the abuse was far less obvious than my example. Very similar to the stories I hear women expressing. The difference being that as a man my ego was being fed, and even when I was angry or disgusted, even accepting, I saw the abuse as a compliment.
I suspect that men don't think of sexual encounters in the context of their own abuse. I know I didn't. But I've learned...
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Well... as I am writing this another man has been accused of abusing women sexually. I am not writing this to make excuses for men. Far from it, I recognize how male behavior can be reprehensible. The only comment I have in this regard is that people are increasingly looking for black and white perfection, when the world is a very gray place. In this context, the gray areas we seem to easily forget, I write this article.
The recent news stories have brought many thoughts to me. I am a feminist in that I believe in equality of opportunity. I believe in equal pay for equal work. I believe in supporting and fighting for a forum for my wife and daughter and granddaughter to express their concerns, and as long as they are legitimate and well presented... to change my thought processes and actions to accommodate them.
Just as I do for myself and my son and grandson. Equality.
In this most recent process, I am seeing a huge lack of reciprocity, the opportunity for men to participate in any dialogue. I have tried, but women are angry, and my own experience has been to be shut down and even vilified for presenting a male perspective.
But being told that the only “proper response is to shut up” doesn't stop the thought process.
So I've been thinking while I listen. And my thoughts began to naturally wander toward my own experiences. I have a couple of encounters in my past where I wonder if I crossed the line as an adult. I don't *know*, but I believe I may have stepped beyond propriety. I regret these experiences.
I was also sexually curious as a child, but after research, I found out that 85% of children have sexual experiences within the context of play and that these experiences are considered natural and normal. I might add that even if the roughly 50% that are male were 100% engaged, that would mean 75% of females would be engaged to get to the 85% stated from my source.
But I was still thinking. As the conversations continued, the numbers of men grew, the anger and frustration swelled... I kept thinking, and much of it was about my past experiences.
And then the light bulb came on.
You see, even though I have never seen my experiences as abusive from my male perspective... as in MYSELF being abused, in the context of the way these discussions are framed many of them WERE abusive to ME.
Remembering them, I began to place myself in the memories as the female participant and the woman as the male participant. A thought experiment. And the light bulb BLAZED.
The most obvious one was where a much older woman offered me a place to live during a temporary job in the area she lived. I had rented an apartment in a house, the building sold, and I was scrambling to find a place to live. She worked as a hostess at a local restaurant where I had breakfast every morning, and she offered her cabin at the lake. She said as long as she didn't charge rent, no one would care. But they did... and soon she was offering an extra bedroom in her home. A home she shared with her husband and a son that was almost as old as me. Soon she was offering to “take me to ecstasy”, and nuzzling my neck in unsolicited embraces. And what was I to do? I was titillated and felt complimented as she was a stunningly beautiful woman. And I needed a place to live. I'm absolutely sure her husband knew what was going on as time went on. There was too much sun lotion being applied, too many unnecessary hugs, too many interrupted whispers.
I managed to avoid coitus, although this woman tried mightily to arrange encounters. She and her husband even showed up at my wedding, driving several hundred miles, she to proposition me the night before the event.
Doesn't this sound like abuse?
As I continued to think about the past, my growing list of experiences, I came to realize that the women involved were as likely to be abusive of me, perhaps more so.
I have two fingers on my hand where I feel I may have crossed a line. But I have both hands used when counting abuses of myself. Perhaps this discrepancy is natural. We tend to remember the slights in life more than the more subtle support, don't we?
Some of the abuse was far less obvious than my example. Very similar to the stories I hear women expressing. The difference being that as a man my ego was being fed, and even when I was angry or disgusted, even accepting, I saw the abuse as a compliment.
I suspect that men don't think of sexual encounters in the context of their own abuse. I know I didn't. But I've learned...
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November 17, 2017
10 Gift Ideas for Geeks
©2017 Kari Carlisle
First of all, it’s important to note that not all geeks are the same. Don’t make the mistake Amy made on The Big Bang Theory when she says the guys were playing a “Star Trek” game when, as Penny rightly corrects her, they were playing a “Star Wars” game. Of course, then Penny follows that with a mistake – when Amy asks, “What’s the difference?” Penny says, “There’s absolutely no difference!” Penny could not be more wrong (yes, another Big Bang reference). There is a huge difference. So if your geek is a big Star Wars fan, do NOT buy him/her a model of the starship Enterprise. Likewise, if your geek is a big Star Trek fan, do NOT buy him/her a lightsaber.
Unfortunately, it’s really much more complicated than that. Like the Big Bang guys, many geeks are fans of both franchises, along with a multitude of other TV shows, movies, comic books, cartoons, video games, cosplay, science fiction, fantasy, steampunk, etc. And their level of fandom of each will vary dramatically. Just because someone might appreciate a good Ewok joke on Facebook does not mean a life-size plush Ewok doll is the ideal gift for that person. And if you don’t know what an Ewok is, you have a lot of homework to do. You will need to do some sleuthing to figure out your geek’s preferences.
Once you have a solid idea what your geek is a big fan of, look for unique gifts associated with those preferences. Start now and you can find awesome, custom-made or vintage gift items for the holidays in a range of prices on sites such as Ebay and Etsy. Here are some ideas for you (links are for your convenience - we are not making any money on your purchases)...
For the coffee-drinking anime fan:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/525256025/anime-gifts-anime-anime-mug-gifts-for?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=anime%20gifts&ref=sr_gallery_12
For the pierced superhero fan:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/edd3/?CJID=%zi&istCompanyId=007b6f44-e03c-4536-8b29-58e160067143&istItemId=wpmrpqpww&istBid=t#tabs
For the beer-drinking Game of Thrones fan:
http://store.hbo.com/game-of-thrones-gold-ommegang-glass/detail.php?p=921114&v=hbo_gift-finder_by-show_game-of-thrones
For the swimming Star Trek fan:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/jojq/
For the bespectacled gamer:
https://www.kyledesigns.com/video-gamer-eyeglasses-case/
For the comfort-loving Walking Dead fan:
https://www.fun.com/walking-dead-rick-grimes-bathrobe.html
For the curious Outlander fan:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/285989015/under-jamies-kilt-outlander-inspired-soy?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=outlander&ref=sr_gallery_4
For the Alien fan with a sweet tooth:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/jpqs/
For the tunes-loving Star Wars fan:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/kgmm/
For the Doctor Who foodie:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/f339/
If all else fails, buy tickets to the next nearby Comicon/Sci-Fi convention. It’s a guaranteed winning gift for any geek!
Click here to receive the Apocalypse Observer Newsletter in your inbox
www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
First of all, it’s important to note that not all geeks are the same. Don’t make the mistake Amy made on The Big Bang Theory when she says the guys were playing a “Star Trek” game when, as Penny rightly corrects her, they were playing a “Star Wars” game. Of course, then Penny follows that with a mistake – when Amy asks, “What’s the difference?” Penny says, “There’s absolutely no difference!” Penny could not be more wrong (yes, another Big Bang reference). There is a huge difference. So if your geek is a big Star Wars fan, do NOT buy him/her a model of the starship Enterprise. Likewise, if your geek is a big Star Trek fan, do NOT buy him/her a lightsaber.
Unfortunately, it’s really much more complicated than that. Like the Big Bang guys, many geeks are fans of both franchises, along with a multitude of other TV shows, movies, comic books, cartoons, video games, cosplay, science fiction, fantasy, steampunk, etc. And their level of fandom of each will vary dramatically. Just because someone might appreciate a good Ewok joke on Facebook does not mean a life-size plush Ewok doll is the ideal gift for that person. And if you don’t know what an Ewok is, you have a lot of homework to do. You will need to do some sleuthing to figure out your geek’s preferences.
Once you have a solid idea what your geek is a big fan of, look for unique gifts associated with those preferences. Start now and you can find awesome, custom-made or vintage gift items for the holidays in a range of prices on sites such as Ebay and Etsy. Here are some ideas for you (links are for your convenience - we are not making any money on your purchases)...
For the coffee-drinking anime fan:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/525256025/anime-gifts-anime-anime-mug-gifts-for?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=anime%20gifts&ref=sr_gallery_12
For the pierced superhero fan:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/edd3/?CJID=%zi&istCompanyId=007b6f44-e03c-4536-8b29-58e160067143&istItemId=wpmrpqpww&istBid=t#tabs
For the beer-drinking Game of Thrones fan:
http://store.hbo.com/game-of-thrones-gold-ommegang-glass/detail.php?p=921114&v=hbo_gift-finder_by-show_game-of-thrones
For the swimming Star Trek fan:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/jojq/
For the bespectacled gamer:
https://www.kyledesigns.com/video-gamer-eyeglasses-case/
For the comfort-loving Walking Dead fan:
https://www.fun.com/walking-dead-rick-grimes-bathrobe.html
For the curious Outlander fan:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/285989015/under-jamies-kilt-outlander-inspired-soy?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=outlander&ref=sr_gallery_4
For the Alien fan with a sweet tooth:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/jpqs/
For the tunes-loving Star Wars fan:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/kgmm/
For the Doctor Who foodie:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/f339/
If all else fails, buy tickets to the next nearby Comicon/Sci-Fi convention. It’s a guaranteed winning gift for any geek!
Click here to receive the Apocalypse Observer Newsletter in your inbox
www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
November 10, 2017
Rape, #metoo?
©2017 C. Henry Martens
This was posted by a woman on Facebook:
"27 years ago in London... a college exchange program and too many pints led to..."
What?
What does your imagination lead you to think? 27 years ago... and too much to drink, and she still remembers it.
The #metoo phenomenon has recently taken off. I want to participate by being sympathetic. I want to understand the issues. I want to educate myself and inform others. I want to offer comfort to those abused and in pain. But above all, I want to find a best solution so the problem with no reasonable perfect outcome becomes less likely to cause heartache.
In this, I find the victims of sexual abuse reluctant, often vehemently opposed, to allowing dialogue that takes away from the sensitivity they are seeking.
Nothing but acquiescence, in complete silence, by men, seems to be tolerated.
First off... I am a man. I recognize and accept that sexual abuse is largely, everything but exclusively, the result of a problem with the actions of male human beings. The weapon driving this crisis is mainly a penis-driven brain. Doesn't it seem logical that male perspective would be valuable to better results? To begin a learning process and understanding whys and hows and what-not-to-do's?
So to begin with, I've spent a lot of time agonizing over what I've done in my life. And it didn't begin with this present debate. I've wondered if behavior is appropriate for a long time and been shocked by my lack of impulse control on occasion. Most of my friends see me as a pretty insensitive guy, but they rarely delve into the depth of the truths I voice, the intricacies that most people don't think about. We would all be better served if we would consider all perspectives before having a conversation or voicing an opinion, but most people don't do that beforehand it seems. So... I try to do that. I make an effort to listen over time and correlate different perspectives ahead of time so I can offer value. But truths are often difficult to hear, much less accept. I've learned this in writing, that an idea has to be expressed many times, preferably in different terms and contexts before people see the logic... and then, only if they don't place barriers up in defense of what they think already.
So people are reticent to consider an issue from any perspective than their own, and in the #metoo movement, the issue has already been decided using political correctness to exclude male perspective. Well, unless the man's story is as a victim.
Most issues requiring a solution resist being solved because people are unwilling to think differently. In this regard, I find the subject of sexual abuse to be stifled. Stifled and prone to continuing angst because of a lack of dialogue involving both sides. After all, the penis being used as a weapon has a person on both ends.
I reject that men should be excluded from discussion of a male problem. I also reject the growing shaming of men for simply being born male. I reject that “male privilege” has no corollary in or with “female privilege.” And while we're at it, I reject several of the premises that allow those-that-will-become-victims to deny any understanding beforehand.
There has been a wonderful, very short article posted on social media by a woman, Nicole Stamp. She wrote it in response to many men asking, “What can we do?” This link should get you to it if you care to read, and I recommend it.
But do not mistake my admiration of the effort for condoning the inherent misandry of the conclusions. The article is well written and thoughtful but from only one perspective.
I agree with many of the things said, “she'd rather be introduced by her job title and accomplishments,” “Be wary of... telling little girls they are pretty...” (at the expense of smart, kind, inventive... [my words]), and “Use insults that work on everyone rather than insults that specifically target the feminine....”
On the other hand, “If you're having sexy time and the other person stops reciprocating,” abstains from advising a clear message and in fact provides an excuse for the lack of one.
Advising men to indulge in books, TV, and movies that “prominently feature female characters” ignores that those products often enforce the worst of female stereotypes.
Within the article, I found many gender biased suggestions. Still, I found the intent to be laudable. It was just so damn one-sided. In fact, one of the suggestions was “When... you're going to share an article, especially if it's a gender issue, take a minute and try to find one written by a woman.” My take? Try to find one written by a man! Likely difficult. That search will illustrate the level of hesitancy men have for providing a voice, a perspective, and that the male story is marginalized by loud voices insisting that only victims have legitimate claims to understanding.
My point in all of this is that there are reasons men create victims. Not that they intend to as most of the time, it is by sheer ignorance, being oblivious to anything other than their own premature emotions or thoughts. Ignorance is cured by education. The other reasons, right up to the rage some men feel that leads to violence, can be addressed. But not by telling them “the only correct response is to be quiet and listen.” And shaming creates anger as well as unjustified guilt.
I appreciate Nicole's last line, “Thanks for trying to be decent men. We see you.”
But in regards to non-violent sexual abuse, I would suggest sharing a dialogue might be more productive.
We seem to also be forgetting that men AND women have a biological urge to procreate. We are designed for this. But men and women are different. In general, women are more comfortable with rules and social structure, and men are inclined to test boundaries and push limits. These urges are part of our genetic make-up and no more choices than being gay or having five fingers. We can intellectualize this, attempt to give men alternatives to acting out, but in the end, young men will be more likely to misunderstand their initial sexual encounters and form ideas based on what they get away with. This is not a plea for sympathy, or an excuse, but a fact of gender differences. Young women have a lot of power if they are inclined to accept it, and if they are encouraged to wield it. Saying “No” to a boy full of hormonal urges may cool his ardor, but if it doesn't, getting up and walking out or several other strategies will. And in the end, consequences are essential. Education is the only way to give maturing children values and behaviors that we will all find appropriate.
Oh, by the way, that example illustrated at the beginning of this article posted on the internet, ended like this:
“27 years ago in London... a college program and too many pints led to a really good thing! Love you, Matt.”
It's nice to know that some things end well...
Click here to receive the Apocalypse Observer Newsletter in your inbox
www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
This was posted by a woman on Facebook:
"27 years ago in London... a college exchange program and too many pints led to..."
What?
What does your imagination lead you to think? 27 years ago... and too much to drink, and she still remembers it.
The #metoo phenomenon has recently taken off. I want to participate by being sympathetic. I want to understand the issues. I want to educate myself and inform others. I want to offer comfort to those abused and in pain. But above all, I want to find a best solution so the problem with no reasonable perfect outcome becomes less likely to cause heartache.
In this, I find the victims of sexual abuse reluctant, often vehemently opposed, to allowing dialogue that takes away from the sensitivity they are seeking.
Nothing but acquiescence, in complete silence, by men, seems to be tolerated.
First off... I am a man. I recognize and accept that sexual abuse is largely, everything but exclusively, the result of a problem with the actions of male human beings. The weapon driving this crisis is mainly a penis-driven brain. Doesn't it seem logical that male perspective would be valuable to better results? To begin a learning process and understanding whys and hows and what-not-to-do's?
So to begin with, I've spent a lot of time agonizing over what I've done in my life. And it didn't begin with this present debate. I've wondered if behavior is appropriate for a long time and been shocked by my lack of impulse control on occasion. Most of my friends see me as a pretty insensitive guy, but they rarely delve into the depth of the truths I voice, the intricacies that most people don't think about. We would all be better served if we would consider all perspectives before having a conversation or voicing an opinion, but most people don't do that beforehand it seems. So... I try to do that. I make an effort to listen over time and correlate different perspectives ahead of time so I can offer value. But truths are often difficult to hear, much less accept. I've learned this in writing, that an idea has to be expressed many times, preferably in different terms and contexts before people see the logic... and then, only if they don't place barriers up in defense of what they think already.
So people are reticent to consider an issue from any perspective than their own, and in the #metoo movement, the issue has already been decided using political correctness to exclude male perspective. Well, unless the man's story is as a victim.
Most issues requiring a solution resist being solved because people are unwilling to think differently. In this regard, I find the subject of sexual abuse to be stifled. Stifled and prone to continuing angst because of a lack of dialogue involving both sides. After all, the penis being used as a weapon has a person on both ends.
I reject that men should be excluded from discussion of a male problem. I also reject the growing shaming of men for simply being born male. I reject that “male privilege” has no corollary in or with “female privilege.” And while we're at it, I reject several of the premises that allow those-that-will-become-victims to deny any understanding beforehand.
There has been a wonderful, very short article posted on social media by a woman, Nicole Stamp. She wrote it in response to many men asking, “What can we do?” This link should get you to it if you care to read, and I recommend it.
But do not mistake my admiration of the effort for condoning the inherent misandry of the conclusions. The article is well written and thoughtful but from only one perspective.
I agree with many of the things said, “she'd rather be introduced by her job title and accomplishments,” “Be wary of... telling little girls they are pretty...” (at the expense of smart, kind, inventive... [my words]), and “Use insults that work on everyone rather than insults that specifically target the feminine....”
On the other hand, “If you're having sexy time and the other person stops reciprocating,” abstains from advising a clear message and in fact provides an excuse for the lack of one.
Advising men to indulge in books, TV, and movies that “prominently feature female characters” ignores that those products often enforce the worst of female stereotypes.
Within the article, I found many gender biased suggestions. Still, I found the intent to be laudable. It was just so damn one-sided. In fact, one of the suggestions was “When... you're going to share an article, especially if it's a gender issue, take a minute and try to find one written by a woman.” My take? Try to find one written by a man! Likely difficult. That search will illustrate the level of hesitancy men have for providing a voice, a perspective, and that the male story is marginalized by loud voices insisting that only victims have legitimate claims to understanding.
My point in all of this is that there are reasons men create victims. Not that they intend to as most of the time, it is by sheer ignorance, being oblivious to anything other than their own premature emotions or thoughts. Ignorance is cured by education. The other reasons, right up to the rage some men feel that leads to violence, can be addressed. But not by telling them “the only correct response is to be quiet and listen.” And shaming creates anger as well as unjustified guilt.
I appreciate Nicole's last line, “Thanks for trying to be decent men. We see you.”
But in regards to non-violent sexual abuse, I would suggest sharing a dialogue might be more productive.
We seem to also be forgetting that men AND women have a biological urge to procreate. We are designed for this. But men and women are different. In general, women are more comfortable with rules and social structure, and men are inclined to test boundaries and push limits. These urges are part of our genetic make-up and no more choices than being gay or having five fingers. We can intellectualize this, attempt to give men alternatives to acting out, but in the end, young men will be more likely to misunderstand their initial sexual encounters and form ideas based on what they get away with. This is not a plea for sympathy, or an excuse, but a fact of gender differences. Young women have a lot of power if they are inclined to accept it, and if they are encouraged to wield it. Saying “No” to a boy full of hormonal urges may cool his ardor, but if it doesn't, getting up and walking out or several other strategies will. And in the end, consequences are essential. Education is the only way to give maturing children values and behaviors that we will all find appropriate.
Oh, by the way, that example illustrated at the beginning of this article posted on the internet, ended like this:
“27 years ago in London... a college program and too many pints led to a really good thing! Love you, Matt.”
It's nice to know that some things end well...
Click here to receive the Apocalypse Observer Newsletter in your inbox
www.readmota.com
To comment, scroll down and type in your comment. Under Comment As, you can select Anonymous or Name/URL (you don't need to enter a URL). Then hit Publish.
