Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 12

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

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Published on October 17, 2024 11:59

The work is figuring yourself out

The work is figuring yourself out. It’s looking back at the feelings underneath and the belief systems that we have about ourselves that make us make certain choices and create certain patterns in our life. Jennifer Lopez

Growing up in the Catholic Church I interpreted that doing the "right" thing and praying meant that I would have no problems in life. Follow the formula, be a good person, pray and confess. Well, was I in for a shocker. In this experience, called life, there will be unexpected moments, lessons, challenges, ups and downs that no matter how much goodness I pour into the world there will be experiences that come to teach you, to show you, to make you grow. This is how we grow.

Humans are creatures of habits, what we do repeatedly become our lives, good or not so good. If we are not paying attention, life gives us some nudges to bring us back to center. Those nudges can become great lessons, markers and growth spurts if we pay attention. If we ignore the nudges they continue until we pay attention. The work is really about figuring out ourselves and paying attention to the nudges and signs. So when situations come up, and come up they do, we can take responsibility, hold ourselves accountable rather than shame, blame, deny and justify.

What I have learned is whether we agree, believe it or know, our beliefs show up in how we live. When we pay attention and become more self aware and live from a place of beliefs that serve us

Peace and Blessings

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Published on October 15, 2024 12:47

We are wired for grace, healing and joy.

We are wired for grace, healing and joy. It's part of our sacred anatomy - Carolyn Myss

I've been waking up with more joy in the mornings. This joy is based solely on the respect I now have for myself

For myself to be aware of how much I have grown, forgiven, accepted, surrendered, admit the mistakes I made, loved. All of that has shown me that this experience called life is a process and I now know that I have the power to respond, to choose. The recognition of the preciousness within ourselves and of others is now something I do not take for granted.

The recognition of our worth, our inherent, irremovable worth is now something I believe in, I have added it on my phone the simple statement "I am worthy" "we are worthy" to support me as I move through every day.

Peace and Blessings

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Published on October 11, 2024 07:53

Pay Attention to the Voices in Your Head

Who are you listening to in your head? Carolyn Myss

Which voice is loudest in your head? Do you even know? Do you even care?Is it the voice of reason? Is it the voice of doubt?Is it the voice of the divine?Is it the voice of the the Holy Spirit?Is it the voice of the society?Is it the voice of your parents, your friends, your loved ones?Is there even a voice at all?
There are so many voices competing for our attention. The voice that you pay attention to makes a difference because when you make a choice it is an act of creation.If your choices are stepped in doubt then you create a choice in doubt. If you choose based on the voice of the divine, you will be divinely guided making a choice from that space.Pat attention to the voice that you listen toPay attention to the choices you make from those voices because those choices over and over create your life.
The voices in your head ought not to push you to make choices and create a life that is chaotic, fearful and without love and carePay attention to the voices in your head this week and when they come up to terrorise you, replace it with a different type of self talkPeace and Blessings

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Published on October 09, 2024 10:30

Humility. Integrity. Simplicity

Humility. Integrity. Simplicity Dr Wanjiru Kamau

A friend sent me a You Tube Video of Dr Kamau. She was being interviewed about feminism and modernity in Kenya. Her words caught me. I usually scroll through the videos, if its more than 5 minutes, I am ready to roll. Confessions - I have indeed been sucked into the instant generation that watch short videos and clips. Get to the point and fast!

The interview was almost an hour long. Oh dear! I started looking at it and just as I was about ready to scroll and roll, Dr Kamau started talking about how we view ourselves determine not only how we show up in the world but also how we make decisions. She talked about being careful how we swallow beliefs and concepts that are not of us and for us. She talked about knowing fully and fundamentally who we are without comparing ourselves to others for the sake of fitting in. She talked about knowing our history and learning to balance the old and the modern.

There are so many decisions in my life that I have made to "fit in" to be seen as "amenable" to "not rock the boat" why? is it because I believed that being authentically myself would lead to rejection, not fitting in not being able to survive and thrive and I have concluded that the answer is yes, all of the above. I was not at that time feeling secure in who I was to show up in its entirety..

Coming from a country that was colonized by the British, we were sublimely taught that we were better when we spoke the Queen's English rather than our own dialect, we were measured by how we sounded, dressing a certain way to not disrupt, etiquette and presence were all based on a country far away that some of us have never seen, visited or cared to. Yet those were the standards and yes, there are advantages of learning, of experiencing new, keeping an open mind. The challenge is that lies in how we view ourselves when we cannot speak a certain way, go to a certain school and live that type of lie - the playing field is not level

Dr Kamau said know who you are and live your life with humility, integrity and simplicity. Just like that! Infuse your life with those core values and knowing you you are. From that space there will be no need to pretend and live a lie.

Sometimes it really is just the simple things that matter

Peace and Blessings

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Published on October 07, 2024 07:53

Face it or Avoid It - Which one are you?

Avoiding conflict might seem like a good solution in the moment, but it can create more issues down the road. Nawal Mustapha

Dealing with stress and conflict has been a couple of areas that I know that I have to improve on. My "dealing" involves either shutting down, avoiding or just keeping the peace. This is not a sustainable method of "dealing". I have learnt that shutting down and avoidance to keep the peace leads to resistance and resentment because I am not being true to myself. The challenge will remain and return.

Once we know how we truly deal with stress and conflict then and only then we can make amends or fully handle the situation. It takes a level of self awareness, courage and practice to move through life situations that cause stress.

There are times when we choose our battles and there are times we face them, knowing what our tendencies are helps us navigate better on the journey

Peace and Blessings

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What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

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Published on October 03, 2024 16:33

Dear October

Can I say how inspired I am by all the people tending to this hurting world, all the people making their own corners of it brighter, all the people doing work no one will ever see, work they might never get credit for, all the people praying and working and softening and questioning and organizing and unlearning and learning and witnessing and listening and trying? Lisa Olivera

Back in the day, I gave extra meaning and responsibility to the month of October. Something about being in the "last quarter of the year" Perhaps it is a throw back from the days when I was a practising accountant. Each quarter was assigned a meaning for making forecasts and comparing those forecasts with reality. The last quarter was an opportunity for a huge effort and push to achieve the year's goals, also a time where I would notice that the days would become shorter, leaves would start falling off trees and it seemed like nature was also doing something different.

Since I have left the world of finance, measuring quarters and cold winters, I started focusing more on what nature reminds me of in October and maybe just maybe, I can copy what nature does so effortlessly. Let go, make room, release. Prepare for what is to come.

I have learnt that:

Not every season is for planting. Some are for reaping

Not every season is for expansion. Some are for releasing

Not every season is for grinding, some are for resting

Not every season is for cranking up the noise, some are for silence, for quiet

Not every season is for working, some are for dreaming.

Not every season is for others, some are for you

Not every season is for hiding, some are for showing off.

Let the seasons guide you, rather than force. Flow. Surrender. Accept.

Peace and Blessings

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Published on October 01, 2024 15:35

Making Room and Allowing

This time of year is an invitation to allow things to fall away Stacey Herrera

The end of September is fast approaching. I saw a meme on IG that said "September acted like they had somewhere to go and fast" I did chuckle seeing that. September for some reason felt as if it paid us a quick visit just to say hi and shake things up a bit.

The last few months of the year provides an opportunity to let go, just like the leaves of the trees fall off in preparation for new growth, new leaves, we can take a page out of nature's book and let go to make room for the new and this goes beyond the physical.

Making room for the new includes forgiving, letting go of the need for the past to be different, surrendering to a higher power when you have done the work, releasing the control and manipulation over a situation. Making room includes questioning beliefs that no longer serve you, the ones that you are holding on to due to shame, guilt, history and fear.

Making room is taking the courageous step to live the life that you desire, to set your goals and articulate your dreams

If we start making room now, when 2025 rolls around we are better equipped to move forward with grace, patience and self belief.

Cheers to the rest of 2024 and to allowing things to fall away

Peace and Blessings

Akosua wins the 2004 Emerging Inspirational Leader Award

Honoured at awards gala

Akosua's Books

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

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Published on September 30, 2024 07:34

Resilience is built in

Your reservoir of resilience is not a finite resource. - Stacey Hererra

Resilience is built in super power we human beings possess. We either forget, don't believe or take it for granted. Think about it, there are situations that you have been in that may have flattened you and you rose from it, you learnt from it, you were even blessed by it.

We, like the sun and the moon, rise again and again. Its important to remember that when passing through a storm or a hurricane - the experience of life is not always linear and that is why our reservoir of resilience is not a finite

Maybe the focus ought to be on remembering that we are built with this resilience and focusing on moving forward, feeling our feelings as guides.

Peace and Blessings

Akosua wins the 2004 Emerging Inspirational Leader Award

Honoured at awards gala

Akosua's Books

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

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Published on September 25, 2024 10:11

My child, no more chasing and no more settling

My child, no more chasing and no more settling. You know this from your addiction recovery. The rule of love for you is: no chasing. No chasing a feeling, no chasing a person, no chasing a fantasy. No chasing the past or the future. And no more melting, melding, binding Elizabeth Gilbert

I was taught to go after what you want. Whatever it takes, go for it, take no prisoners, take no for an answer. And yes, there were times that using this approach worked so well, I got what I wanted and felt like a million bucks. The trouble starts when that approach does not work or getting addicted to believing that I was in control. For those who are regular to this space, you would have seen that time and time again, I talk about everything being in balance, being in harmony.

Being in balance means doing all that you can, putting in the work without expectation, with faith and belief.

These are 5 lessons learnt about chasing without balance

1. Chasing is different to going after something you want. Chasing is forcing and borderline manipulation, it ignores red flags. What you chase will run from you.

2. Chasing removes patience and intuition from the equation. Two important qualities required in achieving our goals and objectives.

3. Chasing can easily turn into manipulation - getting what we want by any means necessary.

4. Many times chasing leads to burn out and resentment. There is a sense of entitlement that comes with always getting what we want based on ego rather than on knowing that everything that is yours is divinely provided.

5. Chasing without balance comes is laced with fear.

Love yourself through it all

Peace and Blessings

Akosua wins the 2004 Emerging Inspirational Leader Award

Honoured at awards gala

Akosua's Books