Barnabas Piper's Blog, page 91
January 22, 2016
The Realest Authenticity
Authenticity is one of the greatest values of our day. And I don’t just mean a cultural value, though it is that. Cultural values are often lies based on the worship of self or some other false god. But authenticity is an actual value. In a world of false fronts and internet perceptions and lack of close relationships it is like finding treasure to find people who are truly themselves, hide nothing, and do not deceive.
Even as I write that, though, I realize the vagueness of it. After all, what is authenticity? Is it being open, being honest, and being vulnerable? Yes. Is it leaving no thought unspoken, revealing too much too son, and dumping your crap on others? No.
The truest authenticity, the best authenticity is humble. Authenticity without humility is a lie.
We cannot be authentic without being humble because otherwise we are presenting a false version of ourselves. We are putting ourselves forth as something better than reality, revealing those aspects of ourselves that might make people think better of us. This doesn’t mean we only say good things – that would be far too obvious a lie. It means we say the less glamorous things in just such a way as to garner sympathy or gain trust without actually risking hurt or exposing pain.
If we lack humility our “authenticity” is based in a misunderstanding of who we are, so what we authentically project to the world is not real. We end up deceiving people by accident as they believe us to be something we are not and we do not know we are not. Or we manipulate them on purpose in order to get them to trust what we are not.
Authenticity without humility is a burden to others. It does not serve them. It does not soothe them. It takes from them, holds them to a false standard, sets them up for a fall. It demands things of others instead of asking self-effacingly for the help we need. In the end people are in relationship with a false you, and when that falls apart the wreckage affects all involved.
Most significantly, lack of humility means that your “authenticity” makes you the hero of your story. We are so steeped in story, so enamored with broken, vulnerable heroes, that we position ourselves as such. We show weakness to highlight strength, and often we don’t even realize we’re doing it. Our authenticity is a carefully situated uniform to make us look great.
Only humility allows God to be the hero of our story and lets us reveal those things about ourselves that we would otherwise veil. Only humility helps us see when the right time to share hard truths is and when it’s best to wait lest we harm or burden another. Only humility helps us set ego aside and share our needs with others. Only humility does not spin a truth or look for the perfect, desirable reaction. In each of these actions we are revealing our true selves – the self in need of God’s grace, not the hero. Without humility thee is no authenticity and without that there is no place for others to see God working.
January 21, 2016
Owning Your Failures
Sometimes a thing happens that you anticipate, that you’ve seen happen many times before, but it still surprises you. For me that thing happened Sunday in the Minnesota Vikings–Seattle Seahawks NFC wild-card playoff game when Vikings’ kicker Blair Walsh shanked a game-winning 27-yard field goal with just seconds left. I’m accustomed to football heartbreak—I’m a Vikings fan after all. I saw Gary Anderson’s miss in the 1998 NFC championship game and Brett Favre’s interception in the 2009 NFC championship game. This heartbreak isn’t new, but goodness, it stings every time.
Just moments after bellowing “NO!” at the TV and then sinking back onto my couch it dawned on me that someone else was stung much worse than I was: Blair Walsh, who just blew the game, the season. He had a chance to win it and he failed. Then many fans turned on him with hateful, vile social media posts. How awful must he feel?
The way Walsh handled his failure is a lesson for us all. He was crushed. He felt the full weight of letting his team and its beleaguered fan base down. He felt the pain more pointedly than anyone else in that stadium or watching on TV from five states away. We know this because he admitted it publicly.
. . .
He did not shy away from critique or questions. He didn’t hide or give a “no comment.” He respected the job reporters had to do and the desire of the fans to hear from him. Walsh committed to improving and to come back better next season. He knew his response would not change things, but it was exactly the right way to handle critics and squelch their ire.
From one perspective we ought to expect such a response from someone who made a mistake. None of Walsh’s actions were exceptional in themselves, but they were remarkable because of their rarity. He showed humility and empathy to the fans’ pain and frustration and faced their criticism. It’s so rare to see a public figure frankly apologize and admit his failure, so much so that Walsh’s unexceptional actions were actually quite exceptional.
. . .
Do we have the humility and self-awareness to respond like Blair Walsh did? Can we apologize without caveats, own our failure, and commit to improvement? Painful as it is, no other response so satisfies the conscience or diminishes conflict.
Read the full article HERE.
January 20, 2016
Just Living Your Life Isn’t Enough
Most of us just live our lives. We live by routine and stay in our lane. Our lives carve tracks that we follow day after day, month after month. And for most people that kind of steady consistency is the ideal. Anything outside of that track is an interruption, a nuisance, or even a crisis.
We make decisions based on this narrow track. What do I need to live my life better? What will help me be a better employee, parent, student, or spouse? What will simplify and enhance my life? These are our filters. And we ignore all that doesn’t fit through the filter. It’s not that those other things are necessarily bad. It’s that they don’t matter. At least to us.
The result is that we shrink our lives. We shrink them to our own needs (or perceived needs) and preferences and schedules and commitments. We shrink the margins of our life to leave room for a little relaxation, a little personal betterment, a little Netflix. We seek to know what we must and little more. We ask those questions that progress us down our track and few others.
J.R.R. Tolkien, in his classic story, The Hobbit, describes a race of beings who sound strikingly like us in the Western world. They live simple lives and love their food and drink. They are suspicious of the outside world, even fearful, but are fascinated by tales of it. In short they desire simple lives with the right amount of pleasure and the occasional tale of what happens “out there” across the borders of the Shire, their home.
We are real life hobbits, seeking peaceful lives centered on daily needs, basic comforts, a little gossip and some good parties. We want to handle our business, do our work, and be compensated fairly for it. But we really want the outside world to stay outside. Don’t invade our Shire. And don’t expect me to go on any adventures or quests into the great unknown, and especially not with anybody strikingly different than I. I get the adventure I need from watching reality TV, nature documentaries, and listening to missionaries talk about the other side of the world. If I get really adventurous I can go find a video on YouTube of someone doing parkour on the Eiffel Tower or something.
But then our carefully directed and graded track intersects and merges with another, that of someone whose experiences wildly diverges from our own. A wizard, as it were, knocks on our door or a pile of dwarves devours everything in our pantry and sings a tale of a dragon. Now our shrunken life isn’t enough to make sense of their life. We’ve heard rumor of such people and such experiences, but they were much more palatable online. We don’t understand and we don’t understand how to understand. We don’t know what questions to ask or what resources to use. We have suppressed and excluded curiosity for so long that we no long have any idea where to find it or how to use it. We are stuck.
Conflict happens. Friction happens. Empathy is nowhere to be found because empathy requires walking a mole in their shoes but we don’t know where to walk or even how. We are inert, lost, frustrated and confused.
This is an excerpt from the book I am currently writing, The Curious Christian (working title) that is due to be released in early 2017.
January 18, 2016
New Happy Rant: An Epic Game of “Would You Rather”
Ted, Ronnie, and Barnabas take on listener-submitted “would you rather questions such as the following:
Would you rather talk predestination with a college undergrad or a Kindergartener?
Would you rather only be able to wear 90’s Christian t-shirts or have to sport a man bun?
Would you rather have sat courtside to see Michael Jordan or have been in the front row for Michael Jackson?
These are just a sampling, so tune in for the full, tense, agonizing, nail-biting discussion.
Big thank you to Resonate Recordings, the fine folks who make us sound listenable. If you are looking for great people to help your church put out recorded sermon audio or help you with a podcast they’re your people. T
Feel free to hit us up on Twitter at @HappyRantPod or on Facebook with any topic suggestions or feedback. We love hearing from listeners!
To listen you can:
Subscribe in iTunes.
Listen on Stitcher.
Leave us a rating in iTunes (it only takes 1 click and it really helps us).
Listen using the player below.
Episode #71
January 14, 2016
What “Seventy times Seven” Means
Forgiveness is hard. To willingly and willfully give up your claim on another person because of a wrong done by them is trying.
One of the most famous and most quoted passages on forgiveness is Matthew 18:21 & 22 where Peter asks if he must forgive someone who sins against him even as much as seven times and Jesus gives the famous response: “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven.”
The obvious and correct interpretation of this passage is that there must be immense forgiveness for wrongs committed against us, many times more than our human nature is comfortable with. We are to be rich in grace toward those who wrong us over and over again and thus forgive them over and over again for their various offenses. For, if we have been forgiven thousands of times over for our wrong doings by Christ, how can we not also forgive others?
But there is a second interpretation, complimentary to the first, which I think is also true and equally as important. And that is this: we are to forgive the wrong doer seventy times seven for the same single sin against us.
When someone hurts us deeply it is not as simple as to forgive them and be done with it. It’s not that simple because the hurt runs deep and keeps hurting days, months, years after the initial offense. It’s not that easy because certain words, places, circumstances, or conversations remind us of the hurt over and over again. And it’s not that simple because we’re sinners. When we forgive, it is eroded by our own heart’s bitterness and undermined by our own self-righteousness. It is forgotten in fits of self-pity or anger. Our forgiveness is not a finished or eternal offering.
So we must forgive that single person for that single hurt not just once, or seven times, but seventy times seven. Every time we face those certain words, places, circumstances, or conversations that bring the hurt back we must choose to forgive again.
This kind of forgiveness is, in my experience, the hardest to do, and that’s because the kinds of offenses that require it are the most hurtful. It’s one thing to forgive a brash, loud-mouthed co-worker over and over again because they manage to be offensive with every other sentence. It’s another thing entirely to forgive, daily, the spouse or parent or friend who has undermined your credibility or betrayed your trust. But it is good.
Seventy times seven means far more – but never less – than forgive each time you are wronged. It means forgive offenses to completion even if that means a daily, or even hourly, decision to let the debt go.
January 12, 2016
7 Reasons Sports Matter So Much to So Many
Last week the baseball hall of fame announced their 2016 inductees, the NCAA Football championship game is fast approaching, and the NFL playoffs begin. Combine that with the NBA and NHL seasons and college basketball hitting mid-season stride and sports is near to peak excitement. Stories and debates and social media buzz abounds; it’s hog heaven for sports media and fans.
With the fervor at such a pitch I couldn’t help but wonder why. Why do sports matter so much to so many? Why do these games and these votes for entrance into a museum raise such ire and passion and zeal? Here are seven reasons people are so invested.
1) The Thrill
Sports are sheer, unadulterated fun. They provide moments of tension and excitement with regularity and intensity like no other entertainment or activity.
2) Identity
When tens of thousands of fans walk into a stadium or arena wearing the same colors they are part of something bigger than themselves. For some this is just a cool experience, but for others it’s much more than that.
3) Filling a Void
To some fans that experience of being part of something fills a hole in their lives. For others the whole thing is a needed distraction from some hardship or pain in their lives, an uplifting few moments between real life’s difficulties.
4) Wonder
A roar goes up from the crowd. “Wow!” exclaims a fan at his TV. These are the reactions sports elicit because of the stupendous feats on the field of play. We love the feeling of being amazed, and sports delivers it.
5) Community
Fathers and daughters, mothers and sons, friends and neighbors, even strangers– sports bring them together at the local park, in living rooms, at arenas, and in back yards. Friendships are formed that last decades for some, and for others it’s the catalyst needed to start a real conversation with a new neighbor.
6) Vicarious Living
In our minds we are young, lithe, in our athletic prime. In reality we stand on the sideline of our daughter’s soccer game with an achy left knee and holler instructions and encouragement and find joy in her efforts and accomplishments. We can still feel the thrill and the disappointment in her experiences, and we love it. And we miss it.
7) Nostalgia
The smell of fresh mown grass, the crack of the bat, the whack of pads, the swish of the net, and the crisp fall air of a Saturday at the park bring us back. Back where? To a thousand of our favorite memories with family or friends, to our triumphs and travails.
No doubt you see yourself in one or more of these. I certainly do, and that reminds me that sports offer the potential for great happiness but also idolatry. We find joy in them but they can also occupy too significant a place in our lives. We love them, and that is good, for they are a good gift. But as we see ourselves in these seven reasons we must be conscientious that our excitement doesn’t become worship and our fervor remains benign. It is wonderful to indentify with others, to connect, to enjoy, to be wowed, and to remember – but not if we begin to find identity on those or turn to them as a primary source of happiness.
January 11, 2016
New Happy Rant: An Emergent Update – Rob Bell, Mark Driscoll, Brian McLaren, and More
In this episode we try something a little different. Since Ted co-authored a book several years ago called Why We’re Not Emergent and since the key players in the Emergent movement keep rearing their heads we figured we’d do a “where are they now?” episode. We follow up on Rob Bell, Mark Driscoll, Doug Pagitt, Dan Kimball, and Brian McLaren to see what they’re doing now, what are they teaching now, and what their current hair styles might be.
We also get an important update from Ronnie on when the heck we’ll get a new intro some we can lay the current one to rest with proper honors.
Big thank you to Resonate Recordings, the fine folks who make us sound listenable. If you are looking for great people to help your church put out recorded sermon audio or help you with a podcast they’re your people. T
Feel free to hit us up on Twitter at @HappyRantPod or on Facebook with any topic suggestions or feedback. We love hearing from listeners!
To listen you can:
Subscribe in iTunes.
Listen on Stitcher.
Leave us a rating in iTunes (it only takes 1 click and it really helps us).
Listen using the player below.
Episode #70
January 7, 2016
Public Apologies Gone Wrong
Markieff Morris doesn’t need my forgiveness for throwing a towel at his head coach, Jeff Hornacek, yet he apologized to me and the rest of Twitter for just that. Morris, a forward for the Phoenix Suns, was angry after being benched in a recent game. The team rightfully suspended him for two games and demanded he apologize to his teammates and coaches before rejoining them. What struck me was Morris’ public apology via Twitter.
Public apologies are the norm now when athletes lose their cool. A groundswell of pressure generated through the press and social media demand them to say they’re sorry and pacify to the masses. But this undermines what an apology is.
. . .
Apologies are for righting wrongs between individuals or groups, for the wrongdoer to admit fault and ask forgiveness. In the case of Rajon Rondo, a volatile point guard for the Sacramento Kings, that meant a public apology did become necessary. During a game on Dec. 3, Rondo used highly offensive slurs directed at gay referee Bill Kennedy. At the time it wasn’t publicly clear what was said, but after the league suspended Rondo the news came out. Rondo issued two apologies, one rather flat, another more pointed, because the repercussions of his actions were harmful to a larger group.
The public cannot, however, always get the apology it wants. Cleveland Browns wide receiver Andrew Hawkins took the field before last Sunday’s game wearing a shirt calling for justice for Tamir Rice and John Crawford III, both shot by the police in the state of Ohio in highly disputed cases. Many police officers and members of police unions were outraged and demanded an apology that Hawkins eloquently, respectfully, and emotionally refused to offer. They wanted an apology because they saw his actions as disrespectful. Hawkins was not cowed and stood by his convictions. He didn’t owe anyone an apology because he had avoided the kind of language or attitude that demean others. He simply took a stand.
In the end, all this apologizing and demanding has undermined “I’m sorry.” In too many cases the coerced apology sounds like a grumpy sibling muttering “I’m sorry your face ran into my fist” to another sibling. The public recognizes the disingenuousness and cries “not good enough!” even though we got what we asked for.
. . .
We love outrage and offense. We love to think someone is indebted to us, to hold our social cred over others’ heads. What arrogance. We can want apologies from those who attack or hurt us personally, but maybe, just maybe, we owe an “I’m sorry” to those athletes from whom we have demanded the same.
Read the full post HERE.
Public Apologies Gon Wrong
Markieff Morris doesn’t need my forgiveness for throwing a towel at his head coach, Jeff Hornacek, yet he apologized to me and the rest of Twitter for just that. Morris, a forward for the Phoenix Suns, was angry after being benched in a recent game. The team rightfully suspended him for two games and demanded he apologize to his teammates and coaches before rejoining them. What struck me was Morris’ public apology via Twitter.
Public apologies are the norm now when athletes lose their cool. A groundswell of pressure generated through the press and social media demand them to say they’re sorry and pacify to the masses. But this undermines what an apology is.
. . .
Apologies are for righting wrongs between individuals or groups, for the wrongdoer to admit fault and ask forgiveness. In the case of Rajon Rondo, a volatile point guard for the Sacramento Kings, that meant a public apology did become necessary. During a game on Dec. 3, Rondo used highly offensive slurs directed at gay referee Bill Kennedy. At the time it wasn’t publicly clear what was said, but after the league suspended Rondo the news came out. Rondo issued two apologies, one rather flat, another more pointed, because the repercussions of his actions were harmful to a larger group.
The public cannot, however, always get the apology it wants. Cleveland Browns wide receiver Andrew Hawkins took the field before last Sunday’s game wearing a shirt calling for justice for Tamir Rice and John Crawford III, both shot by the police in the state of Ohio in highly disputed cases. Many police officers and members of police unions were outraged and demanded an apology that Hawkins eloquently, respectfully, and emotionally refused to offer. They wanted an apology because they saw his actions as disrespectful. Hawkins was not cowed and stood by his convictions. He didn’t owe anyone an apology because he had avoided the kind of language or attitude that demean others. He simply took a stand.
In the end, all this apologizing and demanding has undermined “I’m sorry.” In too many cases the coerced apology sounds like a grumpy sibling muttering “I’m sorry your face ran into my fist” to another sibling. The public recognizes the disingenuousness and cries “not good enough!” even though we got what we asked for.
. . .
We love outrage and offense. We love to think someone is indebted to us, to hold our social cred over others’ heads. What arrogance. We can want apologies from those who attack or hurt us personally, but maybe, just maybe, we owe an “I’m sorry” to those athletes from whom we have demanded the same.
Read the full post HERE.
January 6, 2016
New Happy Rant: Ugly People Can Sing Too, Pastor Self Promo, and Year-End Book Lists
No better way that to start off 2016 than with a bang, and that’s what set out to do on this brand new Happy Rant podcast. As is our way we attack the thorniest of issues and poke fun at the most necessary of things. And we might shoot a sacred cow or two along the way. Here is the rant:
Why are all the Christian singers good looking? Can’t ugly people sing too? And what does this tell people about what it takes to be a successful Christian?
At what point does a pastor’s social media posts about his ministry excitement become overkill?
A discussion of the proliferation of year-end book lists on blogs – helpful, braggy, or something else?
We have a fantastic sponsor this week – Theology For You. They offer a website of fantastic resources including their own podcast, but the big thing they want our listeners to know about is the weekender events they partner with local churches to host. The Theology for You Weekender is designed to help Christians understand theological subjects from Scripture and how those subjects practically apply to everyday life. The topic of their 2016 Weekenders is Union with Christ. Theology for You defines theology as the studied practice of knowing God. That’s theirr heart: to help Christians know and worship God better through the study of Him. For our listeners, just mention the Happy Rant podcast when you contact them about weekenders and you will get a 20% discount!
We want to thank Resonate Recordings, the fine folks who make us sound listenable. If you are looking for great people to help your church put out recorded sermon audio or help you with a podcast they’re your people. T
Feel free to hit us up on Twitter at @HappyRantPod or on Facebook with any topic suggestions or feedback. We love hearing from listeners!
To listen you can:
Subscribe in iTunes.
Listen on Stitcher.
Leave us a rating in iTunes (it only takes 1 click and it really helps us).
Listen using the player below.
EPISODE #69
