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Justice League Movie Confirmed! More Terrible Casting Inbound…

Well, people, it’s finally happening.

The WB just made it official.  The Justice League Movie is going to happen in 2018!  Zach Snyder, director of the Man of Steel movies, is going to helm the DC team-up after Batman vs. Superman, which means that BvS is probably going to end with a set-up for the Justice League.  So far, the casting announcements for Batman vs. Superman make it pretty much Justice League Jr.  We have Superman (duh), Batman (duh), Wonder Woman, and a recently announced appearance by Cyborg.

Though Zach Snyder has proven himself to be a wonderful visualist, his story-telling skills as a director are still uneven, and his casting decisions for these movies have been… well, let’s just say “unconventional.”  Batfleck was not exactly my ideal choice to play the grizzled “older” version of the Dark Knight.  (Seriously, was Josh Brolin too busy or something?)  And Gal Gadot, while amazingly gorgeous, was an odd choice for Wonder Woman.  Then, there’s the relatively unknown Ray Fisher, who was cast to play Cyborg.  And who could forget, of course, you have JESSE EISENBERG as Lex F’n Luthor!!!!  I – I just – *RAGE* I still can’t get over THAT one!  Mark Zuckerburg as Superman’s arch nemesis.  YES!  THAT MAKES SENSE!  Grrrrrr. /rant

With those casting choices already confirmed, one can only imagine how Snyder will fill out the rest of the Justice League roster.  If these are any indication, his choices will be either gloriously horrible, or so stupendously brilliant, we all won’t recognize his genius until we see the final result on screen.  However, being the evil genius that I am, I have constructed a future-viewing device, and glimpsed into the year 2017, getting a look at some of the casting decisions that are made BEFORE THEY ACTUALLY HAPPEN!  (Actually, I just made this stuff up.)  Here are my predictions for the rest of the Justice League cast, based on Zach Snyder’s track record so far…

Aquaman:  Knowing that Aquaman is the least popular DC comics superhero, Warner Brothers and Zach Snyder make a marketing decision to cast Olympic Gold Medalist Michael Phelps in the role, as a way to synergize the “King of the Oceans” with America’s favorite swimmer.  “Warner Brothers is very excited to be working with Olympic Gold Medalist Michael Phelps on the new Justice League movie and feel he is the perfect choice to play Aquaman,” a spokesman for Warner Brothers will say.  “Yes, we know he has absolutely no acting experience at all, but no one cares about Aquaman, so he’ll hardly have any lines in the movie.  He just needs to look good without a shirt and swim really well.  And as we all know, Michael fits that bill to a tee!”  The internet will be on fire talking about Aquaman’s new costume, which will consist of green-and-gold  metallic speedoes, and nothing else (possibly a trident).  Subway will be planning a “Tuna Salad Sub Month” tie-in to coincide with the Justice League movie release, prominently featuring Phelps in his Aquaman get-up.

Martian Manhunter:  In an attempt to reach out to the “African American” film-going community and bring in as many of them as possible, Zach Snyder and Warner Brothers will cast Tyler Perry to play Martian Manhunter, and plan to give him free reign to produce a series of related movies based on the character, such as “Martian Manhunter’s Wedding,” “Martian Manhunter’s Family Reunion,” and “Martian Manhunter Goes To Jail.”  “One of the great things about the Martian Manhunter character is that he just wants to be a normal human, you know?” Tyler Perry will say.  “That gives us a lot of freedom to tell stories about him people can relate to.  I mean, sure, we can see him being a detective and fighting crime.  But we can also see him going to his girlfriend’s family’s house for Thanksgiving dinner and laugh at how they try to relate to the fact their daughter is dating a shape-shifting martian from Mars!”  “I’m really excited to be working with Tyler (Perry),” Zach Snyder will say.  “He really brings a great deal of humanity to Martian Manhunter the character really needs.  It’s almost like watching Eddie Murphy in the Nutty Professor movies!  Tyler plays every character Martian Manhunter shape-shifts into – most of which happen to be fat, old, black women.  It’s a real joy to watch.”

Green Lantern:  Choosing to distance the movie from the previous Green Lantern bomb, Zach Snyder will cast a new Green Lantern, deciding to go in a “different direction” with the character to play against audience expectations.  The part will now be played by comedian Andy Dick, who will surely delight audiences with his off-brand sense of humor, sexually ambiguous mannerisms, and off-script ad-libs.  “I just felt the character needed a fresh take, and Andy was the man to give Hal Jordan what he needed,” says Snyder.  “The audience is going to watch him on screen and and go ‘Wow, what is this guy going to think up to have his ring manifest?’  It’s going to be exciting!”  Warner Brothers will also target the marketing of the character to the LGBT community in an effort to make it appear as though Green Lantern *could* be the first major gay superhero to hit the big screens.  “Everyone who saw the first Green Lantern movie said it was gay,” a Warner Brothers spokesperson will say.  “So we already have that going for us.  Might as well run with it and see where it goes.  Hollywood loves making things gay!  And part of Andy’s brilliance is that you don’t know if he is or if he isn’t, so it appeals to everyone!”

The Flash:  Despite wanting to distance themselves from the previous Green Lantern bomb, Zach Snyder decides to cast Ryan Reynolds as The Flash.  “Ryan and I are really good friends, and I think he got a bad rap for his take on Green Lantern, which was totally the fault of that hack Martin Campbell,” Snyder will say.  “Ryan’s got the all the right wit, charm, and sense of humor to play the Flash.  The Flash is the heart and soul of the Justice League, and I think Ryan brings those qualities to every movie he’s in, especially if that movie has Sandra Bullock in it.  I really think he’s perfect for the part.”  When asked about the possibility of audiences being confused about the actor playing a different superhero than previously established, Snyder will say “No one had a problem with Chris Evans playing Johnny Storm AND Captain America!”  When pointed out Johnny Storm and Captain America were never in the same movie at the same time, Snyder will respond “I think audiences are smart enough to figure out what we’re going for.  I’m not really worried about it.”  When asked to comment on the controversial casting decision, Ryan Reynolds will be too busy fornicating with one of his ridiculously attractive female co-stars, and getting attached to play other superheroes in other superhero movies currently in development hell.

Green Arrow:  Despite the success and popularity of the incredible CW TV show based on the character, the producers decide to keep the movie universe separate and add more female characters to the Justice League roster, hoping to appeal to a broader audience.  Zach Snyder decides to cast Jennifer Lawrence as “Olivia Queen,” a rich debutant who comes off like Paris Hilton by day, but is really the hard-edged vigilante Green Arrow by night.  Oh, she also has a lesbian relationship with The Black Canary, because people love lesbians, and two hot girls kissing works great in a trailer.  In addition, Warner Brothers plans to cash in on her Hunger Game‘s cred, because audiences are already familiar with her running around shooting bows and arrows.  “Jennifer is the perfect actress to play The Green Arrow,” Zach Snyder will say.  “I can’t imagine any other actress playing the part.  In fact, I don’t think anyone could, since everyone else but me wanted her to be played by a man.  Sexists.”  When asked to comment on the controversy, Warner Brothers will release a press statement saying “The Hunger Games franchise proved Jennifer Lawrence shooting arrows on screen for two hours equates to hundreds of millions of dollars in box office revenue.  We here at Warner Brothers totally want in on that noise.”  Already, Green Arrow spin-off films are in the works, most of which have to do with Oliva Queen being forced to fight in “Running Man” type game-shows in tropical locations against murderous teen villains.  According to producers, they will be “totally different” from The Hunger Games.

Hawkman:  With the advancements in CGI, Zach Snyder makes the controversial decision to cast Paul Walker in the role of Hawkman.  “Yes, I know Paul Walker is dead.  It’s a real tragedy,” Snyder will say.  “But due to the nature of Hawkman, he’s going to be mostly CGI anyway, so we might as well go all the way!  And Paul Walker is still really popular with the Fast and Furious crowd.  This also gives us leeway to develop a romance between Hawkman and Wonder Woman, witch the F&F fans would just love.”  Though the media will decry this as a cheap publicity stunt, Warner Brothers will defend the decision by saying “We support Zach Snyder’s creative and artistic freedom to cast undead CGI Paul Walker as Hawkman in the Justice League Movie because we like money.  Everyone knows Paul Walker wasn’t a very good actor, so we’re confident the animators we have working on the project will ensure Paul Walker delivers a better performance in death than he ever did in life.”  Paul Walker’s estate will promptly begin licensing his CGI likeness rights to other films, ensuring the Fast and Furious franchise lives on at least until Fast and Furious 831: Furious N Space ends the epic saga in the year 3,976.

Zatanna:  Zach Snyder casts Megan Fox as Zatanna.  When asked to comment about the decision, he’ll say “She’s super hot, and I want to see her run around in fishnet stockings for two hours.”  Oddly enough, this is the one casting decision absolutely no one has a problem with.

What do you think?  Who will they cast to round out the Justice League Movie?  Please enter your predictions in the comments section below!

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TNT’s The Last Ship – Michael Bay Sci-Fi On TV!

You know, few cable networks are putting out truly great original programming.  Even fewer are putting out truly great sci-fi programming.  TNT is really stepping up their game this summer when they premier the Michael Bay produced The Last Ship as their latest “summer action” series offering.

While not full-on sci-fi, it does seem to have a few sci-fi elements to it.  But as you can see from the extended trailer above, the series definitely has a ton of suspense and drama.  The series is based on a book of the same name by author William Brinkley.  The book is about a US Navy Destroyer that survives a global nuclear war, and it’s crew desperately searches for habitable land.  It would appear the show is going a different route, where the world is ravaged by an extremely deadly virus as opposed to nuclear war, and the ship is harboring a microbiologist (seriously, are there any real microbiologists as hot as Rohna Mitra in the world?) who may have a cure for the disease.  With the world’s population devastated, and the US government mostly collapsed, the last ship could be humanity’s only hope for survival.

TNT ordered 10 episodes, so we’ll get at least that much time to see if this show is going to be any good or not.  If their other original series are any indication, it probably will be!  Even though Michael Bay’s involvement may turn off some, I’ve always greatly enjoyed his work.  He knows how to do fun, popcorn spectacle really well, and he also knows how to make anything with the military spectacularly cinematic.

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Disney Can’t Figure Out Bobba Fett

Here’s an interesting bit of Star Wars gossip from the good people over at MakingStarWars.net concerning the planned Boba Fett stand-alone film Disney is planing to make.  According to them, execs are a bit puzzled over how to make everyone’s favorite bad-ass bounty hunter a Disney-friendly hero, while still retaining his bad-assness.

From what we have heard about the event, there was a lot of discussion about Boba Fett at the breakfast. The executives are apparently enthusiastic about the rocket man. There are some minor problems going forward with a film about a villain, however. The general problem with Boba Fett is how to use him effectively without ruining his evil essence to make him the protagonist of a Star Wars Spin-off film. The executive was overheard (paraphrased) as saying:

“Lucasfilm wants Boba Fett to remain menacing and scary but we have to make him the hero of the film and it is a real challenge.”

Lucasfilm is adapting the Marvel model for most of what they are doing but there isn’t a clear cut precedence for a Boba film to follow. So far, Marvel hasn’t been able to figure out how to make a villain into a hero while keeping the villain dangerous and evil outside of Loki’s antics through various Marvel films.

There are two writers rumored to be working on the Boba Fett spin-off.  One is Simon Kinberg, who in my opinion is a rather mediocre talent, considering the vast majority of the movies I’ve seen of his have been entirely forgettable, and some just downright awful (Jumper, anyone?).  And the other is Lawrence Kasdan, who is an amazing writer, and is responsible for some of the best movies to come out of the 80′s.  So, if Kasdan is working on the Fett movie, I’m sure he’ll figure out how to make it work.  I mean, he basically created the character of Fett in Empire Strikes Back, and he somewhat re-created him with the character of Emmet in Silverado.  However, if it’s Kinberg at the helm, I could certainly see the production running into trouble.

The solution is pretty much obvious to me, however, which is only yet more proof why I should be king of Hollywood an no one else.  (Hear that Hollywood Gods?  Anoint me already!)  Whenever you have a bad guy you need to turn into a hero, you need to have a selfish interest motivating that character’s heroic actions.  Real heroes risk their lives for the good of others.  Anti-heroes risk their lives for their own goals, because it’s in their best interest to do so.

I’ll give you two examples of this.

The first is The Dirty Dozen.  This is a film about a group of criminals who are sent on a suicide mission deep inside Nazi Germany.  Their mission is actually quite an important one, and they’re all chosen for their unique skills, but each member of the Dirty Dozen is an anti-hero.  They’re killers, malcontents, and some are even sexual deviants (who loves ya, baby?).  They go along with the mission because even though the odds are they won’t make it back, if they do, they gain their freedom and escape punishment for the crimes they committed.  The “Freedom in exchange for Service” trope is actually quite common in anti-hero stories.  Anyway, we get to see the Dirty Dozen overcome numerous obstacles and carry out their mission, all the while retaining their bad-assness.  Though the characters are noble in a certain sense, and their actions heroic, they never stop being criminals.

Bad Guys Don’t Have To Become Good To Be Heroic

Another is Escape From New York.  (You could also say Escape From LA here as well, since they’re both basically the same movie.)  In that movie, you have the quintessential criminal/anti-hero, Snake Pliskin, who is injected with a lethal virus by the government and sent into the post-apocalyptic city of New York to rescue the President of the United States.  If he can accomplish his mission in time, he’ll be given the antidote to the virus.  Thus, Snake gets to be his usual bad ass self, while being a hero, even though his entire motivation is self preservation.

Anti-Heroes Are Heroic Out Of Self-Interest.

Now, this being Disney, there’s a third route to go, and that is the “Bad Guy vs. Lots Of Even Badder Guys” trope, which you see in pretty much every Clint Eastwood western ever made.  This might actually be the way they go, since it opens the avenue to make Boba Fett a “nicer” character in the future.  Essentially, in this example, you have a bad ass drifter come into a town full of good people who are being terrorized by a bunch of really bad people.  The bad people pick on the drifter, and the drifter shows them he’s not to be trifled with.  The good people try to convince the drifter to help them fight the bad people by being kind and hospitable to him and showing them the virtues of their community.  Despite his better judgement, the drifter becomes attached to the nice townsfolk.  The really bad people then attack and hurt/kill the nice townsfolk and almost kill the drifter, who somehow survives.  The drifter then gets REALLY angry and kills every last single bad guy in a spectacular fashion to get revenge, then heads off into the sunset.

So there you go, Disney!  3 plot devices you can use for your Boba Fett movie, free of charge!  Just have some newly formed Republic troopers haul Boba out of the Sarlac Pit for a special mission that only he can perform (like bringing in an Imperial Assassin that only he could track down or something), and somehow force him to cooperate.  Or have him crawl out on his own and be taken in by some nice moisture farmers who are being terrorized by Hutt gangsters or something.  There are a couple billion ways you could play this.

What you DON’T want to do is white-wash the character and make him “kid-friendly.”  Part of what made Boba Fett so cool was that he was a bad ass.  You can still have bad asses and make them palpable to kids.  Remember the first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle movie in the 90s?  The turtles were total bad asses!  Then they got dumbed down for the sequels and kids lost interest, because even kids can tell when stuff is lame.  And look at the latest Captain America movie as well.  That film pulled no punches with its violence, yet, it was acceptable for children – in fact, I’d argue it’s one of the greatest superhero movies of all time.  Just treat the characters with respect, and you can’t go wrong.

And if anyone deserves respect, its Boba Fett.

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Watching This Will Make You Love Twilight: Eclipse

Let’s face it.  The Twilight movies… they’re not very good.  But when Bad Lip Reading does they’re take on them, they become AWESOME.  I had more fun watching this than I did the actual movie!

The best part is when he hits the cat.  Ha ha haa. 

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The Star Wars Expanded Universe Is Dead

Well, it might not be dead, but the recent announcement from Disney and Lucasfilm has basically made every piece of the Star Wars Expanded Universe the red-headed step child of the franchise.  For those of you who don’t know, the Expanded Universe (or EU) is essentially all the extra-cannocal stuff that happens outside of the movies and a few select TV shows.  So pretty much every book, comic book, and video game under the “Star Wars” banner falls into that category.  So do some of the TV shows, such as the Christmas Special and cartoons such as Droids.

Essentially, the EU started way back in 1991 when the first original Star Wars novel, written by Timothy Zahn, called Heir To The Empire, was released.  In true Star Wars fashion, it was part of a trilogy of books that came to be known as the “Thrawn Trilogy” and focused on events 5 years after the end of Return of the Jedi.  I can remember reading these books as a teenager and being blown away by how awesome they were.  These books hit the New York Times Bestseller lists and really kicked off the Star Wars EU, which up to that point was really just a handful of Role Playing Games and comic books.

The big question after Disney acquired the rights to Star Wars was how the EU was going to fit into their plans for the sequels they planned to make.  After all, there were some pretty major things that happened over the course of the events that played out in the Expanded Universe (like Chewbacca dying, and whatnot).  Lots of Star Wars fans were interested in knowing if Episodes 7-9 were going to be based on the Thrawn novels.  Well, thanks to an official statement on StarWars.com, we have our answer:

For over 35 years, the Expanded Universe has enriched the Star Wars experience for fans seeking to continue the adventure beyond what is seen on the screen. When he created Star Wars, George Lucas built a universe that sparked the imagination, and inspired others to create. He opened up that universe to be a creative space for other people to tell their own tales. This became the Expanded Universe, or EU, of comics, novels, videogames, and more.

While Lucasfilm always strived to keep the stories created for the EU consistent with our film and television content as well as internally consistent, Lucas always made it clear that he was not beholden to the EU. He set the films he created as the canon. This includes the six Star Wars episodes, and the many hours of content he developed and produced in Star Wars: The Clone Wars. These stories are the immovable objects of Star Wars history, the characters and events to which all other tales must align.

Now, with an exciting future filled with new cinematic installments of Star Wars, all aspects of Star Wars storytelling moving forward will be connected. Under Lucasfilm President Kathleen Kennedy’s direction, the company for the first time ever has formed a story group to oversee and coordinate all Star Wars creative development.

“We have an unprecedented slate of new Star Wars entertainment on the horizon,” said Kennedy. “We’re set to bring Star Wars back to the big screen, and continue the adventure through games, books, comics, and new formats that are just emerging. This future of interconnected storytelling will allow fans to explore this galaxy in deeper ways than ever before.”

In order to give maximum creative freedom to the filmmakers and also preserve an element of surprise and discovery for the audience, Star Wars Episodes VII-IX will not tell the same story told in the post-Return of the Jedi Expanded Universe. While the universe that readers knew is changing, it is not being discarded. Creators of new Star Wars entertainment have full access to the rich content of the Expanded Universe. For example, elements of the EU are included in Star Wars Rebels. The Inquisitor, the Imperial Security Bureau, and Sienar Fleet Systems are story elements in the new animated series, and all these ideas find their origins in roleplaying game material published in the 1980s.

Demand for past tales of the Expanded Universe will keep them in print, presented under the new Legends banner.

On the screen, the first new canon to appear will be Star Wars Rebels. In print, the first new books to come from this creative collaboration include novels from Del Rey Books. First to be announced, John Jackson Miller is writing a novel that precedes the events of Star Wars Rebels and offers insight into a key character’s backstory, with input directly from executive producers Dave Filoni, Simon Kinberg, and Greg Weisman.

And this is just the beginning of a creatively aligned program of Star Wars storytelling created by the collaboration of incredibly talented people united by their love of that galaxy far, far away….

So basically, they’re just throwing out everything the EU has done up to this point.  I can’t say this is really a surprise, since the EU is a pretty convoluted place.  The idea that they want to give the filmmakers the freedom to tell stories the way they want to is a good one, since it will keep things fresh.  I think a big problem with Episodes 1-3 was that is was a lot of re-hashing.  Audiences want something new, and I think Disney aims to give that to them.

Notice how they said “elements” of the EU will still be used.  Basically it seems like they’re going to cherry pick popular things from the EU and incorporate them into the TV shows and movies they are making.  I honestly don’t have a problem with any of this since the Star Wars EU ranges from incredible to downright embarrassing.  Basically, they’re doing what J.J. Abrams did with Star Trek and wiping out the timeline to start fresh.

What do you think?  Is this a good thing, or a bad thing?  Personally, I think it’s a good thing.  Sometimes you have to clear away the clutter and start anew if you want to make something great again.  And frankly, I think after Episodes 1-3, Star Wars needs a reboot.  And this is the first step.

The nice people at Lucasfilm did take the time to put together this cool little video talking about and explaining the EU though.  It’s definitely worth checking out.

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Mystery Science Theater 3000 Is Returning?

Man, oh man.  I just had some flashbacks to my college days where I’d sit around with my buddies in the dorm, drinking beer and laughing our butts off while watching these guys make fun of the most horrible movies imaginable.  Let’s face it, Mystery Science Theater 3000 (or MST3K for the lazy writers out there) was freakin’ brilliant TV.  I’m kinda disappointed that SyFy opts to play a bajillion reruns of Ghost Hunters as opposed to the occasional episode of this masterpiece of television wonderment.  From what I understand, the reason the show doesn’t run in syndication has to do with the licensing of the movies that were used, or something to that effect.  I really have no idea.  I just know that, sadly, it isn’t on anymore.

But all that is about to change.

According to an interview with Wired magazine, MST3K’s original creator Joel Hodgson says that he plans to bring the show back as a web-based series, with a new cast, but featuring cameos from alumni of the original show.  For those of you unfamiliar with the MST3K lore, the show was about a man trapped on a space station and subjected to psychological experiments by a mad scientist; the man (initially Joel Hodgson, later Michael J. Nelson) keeps himself sane by building robot buddies and making snarky comments about the horrible movies they’re forced to endure. That’s the setup, anyway. The real joy of the show was watching really clever people make amazing wisecracks about some of the worst movies ever made.  In a strange way, it make the bad movies a joy to watch.

Since MST3K went off the air, the cast and writers have been busy with other endeavors of similar natures, such as Rifftrax and Cinematic Titanic.  However, neither of these ever captured the magic that MST3K did, mostly because they were separate audio you had to synch up with a movie you were watching.  This got around the licensing issue of the film that was being commented on, freeing up the crew to do actual big-budget Hollywood fare for a change, but it also made it more difficult to enjoy in my opinion.  If the crew could bring MST3K back (MST4K?) in some incarnation, I think it would be very welcome indeed.

What do you guys think?  Would you like to see Mystery Science Theater 3000 return, even if it was internet based?  I think if they did something with Roku or Amazon Fire TV it could probably work.  Heck, even getting Youtube to back them would be huge!  All I know is, I’d like to see Hodgson and the guys get back to doing what they do best – make terrible movies awesome by making fun of how awful they are.

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HULK SMASH!!! Guess Who’s Voicing The Hulk In Avengers 2?

So this was, hands down, one of the best scenes in the Avengers movie.  Who couldn’t help but giggle their butts off when Hulk smashed Loki?  And then, as he walks away, the big Green Machine mutters the line “Puny God.”  Well, actor Mark Ruffalo didn’t voice the CGI Hulk there, it was actually the ORIGINAL and ICONIC Hulk actor himself, former weight-lifting champion Lou Ferrigno, who did Hulk’s voice.

Yep.  That guy.

In a recent Wonder Con appearance, Lou confirmed that he’ll be returning for Avengers 2: Age Of Ultron to do more voice work for the Hulk.  This isn’t Earth-shattering news, but I still think it’s pretty awesome.  I grew up loving the Hulk show, even though it was campy as all-get-out.  And Lou Ferrigno is the quintessential Hulk, so I’m very happy to see that Marvel is keeping him involved with the character, even if it is such a subtle involvement only the most ardent of fans are probably aware of it.

Frankly, I’m just waiting to hear the line “HULK SMASH!”  I mean, who doesn’t want to hear The Hulk say that, right?  And while we’re on the topic, when are we actually going to get a good Hulk movie?  It seems to be the one character Marvel has failed with time and time again.  Frankly, they should just ask Peter David to write them a screenplay.  That man knows his Hulk.  (How funny would it be if they cast yet another different actor to play Bruce Banner?)

Here’s hoping we’ll get more Hulk awesomeness in Avengers 2!

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Storm Troopers Twerking – Proof Miley Cyrus Joined The Dark Side

You know, they may be terribly inept, horrible shots, and susceptible to Jedi mind tricks.  But you have to admit, Storm Troopers know how to bust a move when they want to.  And this amazing fan video just shows everyone’s favorite cannon-fodder minions throw down some Dark Side moves beatbox-style.

Frankly, I think videos of Stormtroopers doing anything are up there with videos of cute kittens, puppies, or babies.  I could just watch them for hours. 

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Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon Prequel In The Works

Hey now!  It’s been about 14 years (God I’m old) since the martial arts masterpiece Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, based on the book of the same name by Chinese novelist Du Lu Wang, was released in theaters.  Though geeks like myself had enjoyed “wire-fu” flicks coming out of Hong Kong for many a moon by the time CTHD came out in the year 2000, for much of the American movie-going public, this was their first real exposure to the incredible martial arts work to come out of modern Asian cinema.

The fact that it had an all Asian cast and also was filmed in the Mandarin language, yet was still able to gross over $100 million at the US box office as well as holding the record for the most Oscar nominations ever for a foreign language film (not to mention being the only martial arts film to ever be nominated for a “best picture” Oscar) is a testament to how amazing this movie was.  Crouching Tiger is one of those rare films that blends emotion, deep characterization, amazing action, sweeping epic scope, and beautiful visuals into a true piece of classic cinema.

And now, they’re making a sequel!

Er… a prequel.  Well, ANOTHER movie!  (It’s unclear if it’s a prequel or sequel yet.)

According to Variety, it’s called “The Green Destiny,” and is being directed by Yuen Woo-ping.  Though Ang Lee, the director of Crouching Tiger, isn’t returning, Yuen Woo-ping was the original martial arts choreographer on the first movie (and the Matrix movies), and is experienced in filming second unit fight sequences for the movies he works on.  So I think he’ll probably do a good job, at least with the action element of the movie.  It could be argued that this might be a cash-grab by the Weinsteins, who are producing the film, since they’re going with an “unknown” director who’s more known for his action chops than deep characterization, but hey, there’s nothing wrong with amazing action, am I right?

Despite the  fairly self-contained nature of the original film, it was based on the fourth of a five-book series – commonly known as the “Crane Iron Pentalogy” which were originally published between 1938 and 1942. The fifth book, titled Iron Knight, Silver Vase, will form the basis of the sequel (prequel?), and was originally the film’s title, according to previous reports. The plot concerns the son of one of the characters of the original (the Iron Knight) and how he is switched as a child with a baby girl (the Silver Vase) and his attempt as an adult to find his true identity. Expect the film’s plot to take great liberties with the book’s story.

The movie’s title “The Green Destiny” is a nod to the name of the sword which was the Maguffin in the first movie, so chances are it will play a prominent role in this one.  (Maybe has something to do with the Iron Knight’s heritage?)  Michelle Yeoh is set to return to reprise her role from the first film, and the talented Donnie Yen (of Kung Fu Hustle fame) has been cast as what I can only assume is the Iron Knight.

Details of the plot are being kept under wraps, but here’s hoping the movie ends up being good!  It’s been a while since any decent martial arts movie has made its way into theaters.

A Farscape Movie? Yes, Please!

“Don’t move! Or I’ll fill you full of… little yellow bolts of light!” – John Chrichon

Man oh man, is this good news for sci-fi fans!  Rockne S. O’Bannon, the producer of the excellent Farscape series which aired from 1999 to 2003 on the SciFi (now SyFy) channel has just announced during Wondercon that a feature film is in the works and a script is in the early development stage!

*nerdgasm*

For those of you unfamiliar with the series, it follows the adventures of astronaut John Crichton who’s sucked into a wormhole during the flight of an experimental spaceship and sent to the other end of the universe.  There, he’s teams up with a motley  group of outlaws on an organic (i.e. living) spaceship and is relentlessly pursued by fascist aliens who believe he is the key to unlocking wormhole travel.  The series was unique in that all the aliens were handled my Jim Henson’s Creature Shop.  Also, the writing was really top notch, and there was some great sci-fi on display in the show.  It’s definitely the reason I became a fan of Ben Browder and Claudia Black.

If they are making a movie, I hope it’s a reboot as opposed to a continuation of the series.  We already had The Peacekeeper Wars which tied up the loose ends that were left hanging when the show got cancelled, and I think Serenity proved movie sequels to cancelled shows don’t always work out.  As much as I loved Serenity, if you weren’t a fan of Firefly, you missed out on a lot of what what going on in that film.  In my opinion, they should probably just reboot Farscape and try to make it a new franchise.  I know that will probably piss off a lot of the fans, but I honestly think it would be the best thing for the producers to do.

But no one in Hollywood ever listens to me, so chances are it will be a new story with the old cast.  But hey, as a long time Farscape fan, I am totally fine with that!